May 2009 - we're all here! btw, does anyone know what the Hungry Cry sounds like?

[Momino]

phew! how many threads have we done since last aug?

spangle I've just had a look at your f/b pics of baby H. He's changed so much!

Sorry for the post and run yesterday, I've just had a hellish time with the DCs. DS1 is in big trouble at school for his behaviour and has to understanding of how close he is to being excluded, made worse by him kicking a boy from the next street on Thurs night - ONE NIGHT after his week-long grounding for fighting at school was up. Yesterday he just lazed around with his face tripping him whinging about the younger DCs. DD1 battered DS2 in the face with a My Little Pony and a shoe so DS2 was inconsolable, I frogmarched DD1 to her room and she almost knocked me back downstairs with her struggling, got back downstairs and DS1 had emptied his bag onto the seat I was sitting at so I launched it onto the floor in a total rage hitting DS2 (who had just stopped crying) so of course I exploded, sent DS1 to bed, hugged DS2 and all the while I was feeding Greer.

I'm still in massive amounts of pain with my back & pelvis, made worse by the fact that I'd stood with my ex-MiL for six hours on Thursday cleaning the house which was back as messy as ever by teatime yesterday. I'm just so miserable with being in such pain that it's destroying my patience levels. It's really shit.

blotted Sounds like you had a rough time yesterday. I hope today is going to go a bit better. Sounds like your ds1 is a handful. Do you think he's feeling a bit left out with all these little ones around him?

Nah I don't think so - the problem is coming from there being only eight boys in his year at school compared to twenty-five girls. They moved up from the infants playground this year and are having a bit of asserting-our-dominance fighting which he takes too far. All the boys in his class have been in trouble but F makes things worse by lying and I can't trust him. He gets plenty of quality time with his Dad at the weekend so I have no idea why he's bringing the schoolyard behaviour home

How about sending him somewhere like karate or judo, where he can fight but learn to use it more positively and he would be around more boys too. I think our ds's are about the same age, aren't they. We haven't got a fighting problem with him, but he has started lying a lot too. Maybe it's an age thing. Usually I know he's lying because I know what is DS naughty and DD1 naughty, IYKWIM.

Yeah he's 8? The fighting I'm not massively concerned about but the lying is driving me to distraction, plus he goes huffy with me for grounding him but he knows the consequences of his behaviour so he only has himself to blame. My only concern with him learning a martial art would be that it's arming him to hurt his peers and he might not be responsible with it.

My ds is 7.5. Ds does judo and the teachers do drum it in to them that it is not to be used outside the judo classes and so far our ds doesn't use it at all. Not even to annoy his sister!

Evening all,

I feel a bit bad, as DS2 has been crying when feeding for a few days/evenings and I've been getting cross with him as he struggles on and off the breast but then doesn't bring any wind up. I got DH to get some gripe water today to see if that would bring his wind up. It instantly calmed him, and although he didnt bring wind up I think he must have been having griping pains . Poor thing. After his gripe water, he was so calm in his bath - never been seen before! I would recommend it for anyone else whose LO is crying for no obvious reason.

Hiya Everyone,

Hope we're all ok??

Havent had a chance to read through

Im have a few questions for you all in the know;

a) what should Coreys poo be like? At the moment its bright yellow liquid with what can only be described as little tiny yellow lentils in it, is that normal? i cant remember!

b) why is his tongue always white? i thought it was because of the milk as it is only the back half of his tongue but dont know!

c) how can i stop my milk supply? i had to give up breast feeding as I just coulnt do it, so have been expressing for him, he now alternates between formula and my milk but I really want to stop my milk, I have cut down my expressing but by the am my boobs are so swollen and hard that it has me in tears, just want to be normal again.

Im a bit down at the moment, hate the way i look now, having a 9lb13.5oz baby has had a mahosive effect on my body, and as for my pelvic floor, Im going to have to go to see my Dr. as its gone!

Corey seems to be doing really well, he's not been weighed for a while now, over a week.

DH goes bac to work on Monday after being off for 3 weeks, am shitting it to be honest, how am I going to cope on my own with 2?!

Hope everyone is ok, will try and be more punctual now!

chocbunnies Glad to hear you're doing well. How do you mean you couldn't do the bf? Was it painful, because it sounds like you've got plenty of milk. Anyway to answer your questions.
a) yellow poo with bits in is normal baby poo, especially bf poo. People usually describe it like korma.
b) the back of a baby's tongue is white right after a feed from the milk. If it's all over and really thick then it could be thrush and baby will need to be seen by a dr.
c) best way to wean is to cut out a feed every couple of days, gradually cut it down. Maybe you've been cutting down too many feeds a day. If you do get engorged it usually fades after a few days, try hot/cold compresses to ease the pain and off course some over the counter painkillers like paracetamol, but don't express as you'll just stimulate your breasts to produce more.

Whoops, clicked post a bit to quickly. I hope that my answers help you and thanks for the reminder of the pelvic floor excersises. Considering the mw told me my vaginal wall was prolapsing a bit I suppose I should really keep on top of that

Goodnight everyone. I'm going to join my dh now and be sociable.

Belgian I couldn't do it as Corey really damaged one of my nipples(Cracked/Bleeding/Almost like it was falling off) this was on day 5, it has only just started healing now and we're on day 19! It was so bad that I was scared to put him back on it. I haven't spoken to anyone about it as Midwife is so pro breast feeding and I just dont want to do it. Also he just wants to feed all the time and I couldnt cope with it so he now has 130mls of breastmilk/formula every 3 hours, to be honest Im not sure if I need to up the amount of formula he has.
I hadnt thought that me expressing was making me produce more, I have been engorged right from when my milk came in as I do have loads, I can easily get 200mls from one boob.
His tongue is really white at the back afer afeed and then it fades but is still a little white, but then we are only 3 hours between feeds.
Glad his poo is normal though!

chocob
good description of poo.. just like my g's and totally normal

not managed to get a good look in g's mouth so can't compare there..

if i remember re milk supply it just stops on it's own.. but can be quite uncomfortable at first until it's re absorbed into your body.. try not to express too much and your supply will lessen.

g's been on another feeding day started fenugreek so hoping it'll help .. dh is feeling rough with a bad cold.. and ds went to bed after discovering why he was having a grumpy day today.. a temp of 100.5.. so hoping the calpol helps him get a good nights sleep.

off to bed for a head start on g waking for her next feed.

x posts with belgian.. should have refreshed on my phone!

re formula amounts.. the box usually has guidelines for mls needed depending on baby's weight..

We've had a miserable day today.

I woke up late with DS2 to find DH and DS1 on their way out. I decided that we'd go too only for DS1 to say that he didn't want me to come. Obviously at 2 and a bit I don't think he meant to hurt me, but I was a bit shocked. He's usually a mummy's boy. He also got far too rough with DS2, which made me shout out in anger and push his hand away, as he was pulling his foot and kind of twisting it at the same time. I was breastfeeding at the time and trying to fend him off. At one point he was squashing the poor little thing.

Somehow DH and I ended up arguing but eventually we all went out in the rain to Stratford, which was lovely, everyone happy.

When we returned DS1 had a nap and woke up and had the most tremendous tantrum I have ever heard. Most of it involved telling me to go away which made me really upset. I know I shouldn't but it did.

DH and I are shattered and feeling like we are coming down with something, which doesn't help. But not a good day today at all.

Dandy your birth story is incredible. I am so angry at your experiences with the doctors. That really isn't good enough.

morning all and happy fathers day to all the dads!

dandy, what a story, what an experience. I hope you get apologies/resolution.

runningmonkey, an epic for you as well. hope writing BS helps.

blotted, very hard work. hope things get better with your ds1 and your pain gets better as well.

llareggub, hope you're feeling better today and your day is better than yesterday.

just finished feeding H and watching her settle herself in her basket whilst I wait for the other DDs and DH to wake up for our weekend morning coffee and milk in bed . it's good to have dd1 &2 back from inlaws. no plans for fathers' day today just taking the little joys as they come.

had 6 (really 7) week check yesterday and all well except harper needs to be checked out for hip dysplasia (sp?) as she has extra folds in her legs and GP wasn't 100% happy with hip movement. I don't know anything about hip dys except a friend of mine found out her DD had it at age 2 and seemed more complicated to treat it at this age instead of as a baby. will google it now.

Hope everyone else is ok and have a great day.

Good morning! Hope everyone is enjoying their day so far.

choco I would ask your HV to check Corey's mouth for thrush. Sara had a little white and I caught it early. Glad I did as even on medicine her whole tongue is now white. Also, they gave me some info and it said in there that it is more common for people who had cracked nipples like you had. Just worth a check to make sure

llareggub Hope you have a better day today! E is also starting horrific tantrums and not really wanting to be around me. I know she does not mean it but I cannot help but be upset by it sometimes. Hope you feel better today.

Day 3 of my medication and so far so good but it makes me sooooo tired! I hope in time that gets better as I am tired enough as it is!

DH had to go into work today Boo. He will be home at 2:30 though so we will have a nice relaxing afternoon and I got steaks for dinner. I am also going to do a treasure hunt, riddle thing for him to find his gift. Thought that would be cute for him from DD. He took the day off tomorrow so going to try and get to the Safari Park for a family day out.

Anyone elses LO's regressing? DD has started waking in the night again. I don't know why. She has slept through the night without a peep for months now. She wakes up everynight now once or twice and by the second time she is wide awake and screams. Won't be laid back down and won't settle. Last night it went over an hour. Makes me mad as I feel like after I finally get Sara settled I should be sleeping! DH usually handles it but still. Just don't know what to do to make her stop now. Just let her cry? She is also making me feed her. She can use a fork and feed herself, but noooo. I must feed her now. I know it is a common thing when a baby is born but wondering how to overcome it all.

Good Morning everybody!

chocbunnies I hope you're ok, you sounded a bit down on your post . Just snuggle your gorgeous boy when you feel sad.

Right, 'inspired' by Dandy (Jesus what a horrendous story, I was truly mortified, furious and just plan bloody upset by your story, sometimes it seems some members of the medical profession don't actually care about the people they take care of) and Running , here is my Birth Story (bear in mind I had a relaxed homebirth planned, with champagne in the fridge for sipping contentedly afterwards ):

Go into hospital 4pm Wednesday June 3rd, into the Low Dependency Unit. Very swish, and DH can stay the night on the sofa bed (although we won?t be staying the night because I?ll have this baby by this evening of course). So, I get my own room, with birthing ball, bean bags, huge pool-like bath, oh just fabulous. Examined by mw, given 1st dose of Prostin. Settle in, mess about, playing with ball and whatnot. Take a walk to cafe within hospital a couple of hours later, see if I can get things going. Nothing happens, so I am given next dose at 11 or 12 that night. Still only 1-2cm dilated, nothing going on so go to sleep. 9am is when cxs start properly, painful but short. Put on monitor and everything is fine, just irregular cx's. Resign myself to a long-haul and tell DH to go home, get showered, changed, check the girls are ok etc at about 11ish. Needless to say, this is when things kick off. I am still only 1-2cm dilated but cxs are now agonising and I'm chuffing on the g&a like nobody's business. God I love the stuff only.......it makes me throw up everywhere, all over me, the mw's etc.

I am cleaned up and then monitored, baby's heartrate has dipped and there is concern, also I am not dilating or contracting properly, decide to break my waters. There is meconium in the waters. I'm feeling a bit panicky by now, things aren't going as they should, it hurts more than I thought, I'm just not dilating and people are concerned about the baby. Decision is taken to move me to HDU and put me on the drip, I am manhandled into backless gown and wheeled over to HDU, crouching on wheelchair, arse on show, puffing and panting. I'm really bricking it by now, as there are mutterings and concerned faces.

DH returns, discovers me missing and finally finds me, in his words, 'grey-faced and terrified'. I hate the MW who will be with me immediately, she's old and stuck in her ways, she will not understand my birthing ideals, I'm furious. The pains are just horrific now, I'm not coping, they're too quick, too strong, I'm out of control and I'm panicking. I tell DH I need an epidural (I always said I would NOT have an epidural). MW goes out, comes in, no epi available yet, she's concerned that the baby may well have the cord round it's neck, wheels in resuss stuff, I'm really scared now. She goes out for something. I turn to DH and say "Does she know I need to push?" all casual-like . He pushes the button. It's 17.40. I am pushing, I have one leg in DHs vice-like grip and the MW (who turns out to be the best I've ever met and I regret my initial reaction to her, she's EXPEIENCED and WISE, rather than OLD) has my other. This is not what you?re supposed to do with SPD, but at this stage I?m thinking ?fuck it?. Well, it turns out that not only does the baby have the cord round it?s neck, it?s back to back. This is why I?ve not been dilating and why it?s been so bloody difficult.

So 17.50 she's born. Utter joy at the realisation have another girl. Would you believe that 10 mins of pushing (yes, my 2nd stage was 10 mins, once the drip kicked in, I dilated in a whoosh), with me (God I?m ashamed of myself) crying ?I can?t do it, I can?t do it? (Bloody wuss) and she was out. It would have been even quicker, but they have to bend the wrong way or something when they?re back to back.

The MW was so wonderful, I honestly think I wouldn?t have done it without intervention if I?d had a less experienced MW, she was unflustered, even when it looked like things weren?t going well.

I?m still not sure whether I should be proud or ashamed that I pushed out an 8lb 11oz baby with an overly large head, with only a tiny 1st degree tear that didn?t require any stitching, in 10 very short minutes. How stretched am I after 3 babies now? DH has offered to ?check?

grumpy Lovely to read your birth story. Not quite what you expected, but you did brilliantly. From my experience both you and your baby behaved in a way that's to be expeted when things move very fast: babies often drop their heart rate (it's the shock I suppose and in your case the cord wouldn't have helped either) and mums loose control and panick If baby was back to back she would have to rotate the long way around, which is why back to back labours are usually longer, unless you've got a bucket of a pelvis like me

chocbunnies I hope your breasts will feel better soon. Engorged breasts can make you feel very uncomfortable I know.

emmab my 7 yo seems to be regressing a bit with his toilet training. DH and I don't know what to do with him. Since the weeing in the car incident last sun, he's wet himself at school on wed and again at home yesterday. He's always had the odd accident, unlike dd1, but he's getting worse.

We're off to a good start to the day. C did 11-3-6 in the night. She woke again shortly after 8 and was in a lovely mood: she's even hsmiled a little and I'm pretty sure it wasn't wind! She also spent my whole breakfast happily lying under her baby gym. About 15 min ago she just drifted off to sleep on my lap without crying or anything. I hope she carries on like this.

No special father's day happenings here. DH left shortly before 9 to help out a friend who is fitting his kitchen. So he'll be out for at least the morning.

(just wanted to say that crying is the very last feeding cue, if you wait until your baby is crying for a feed you have already missed several feeding cues! The first feeding cues are face pulling, head turning/rooting, tongues poking out, arm waving/leg kicking and then fussing [finger/thumb/fist sucking does not mean your baby is hungry!] best to feed them before they are crying, they latch better and feed more calmly, which means less nipple trauma for mum and less wind for baby. I'll go away again.....)

Momino Greer's going to get her hips checked out this week because she failed the clicky hips test

GreenMonkies Er, we know. It was a joke..?

Grumpy Awwww hugs that sounds awfully like my second labour but I caved and got te epidural because I couldn't cope with the transition from no pain at all to oh-my-God-I'm-dying.

Belgian My HV told me that boys having toileting issues is very common around our boys' age. Might be worth mentioning to your GP as there is medication you can try?

grumpy, what a birth story! i called for an epidural during thepushing stage (how silly of me; hope they thought i was making a joke.)

emmabs, both toddlers sometimes insisting on needing help feeding. both want dummies though neither have ever used one. the 22mo dd is also starting to whinge and tantrum constantly but that will be her approaching terrrible 2s. it's driving me mad!

blotted I've already been in touch with the school health team's bedwetting/toiletting section. They said to increase ds's fluid intake during the day, which is proving to be very difficult as he's too shy at school to ask for his bottle and they're not allowed to have it with them on their table. At home it's equally difficult as half the time he refuses to drink saying he's not thirsty and he doesn't seem to be all that bothered about being wet. I'm going to have to get back in touch with them again as he's getting worse rather than better.

greenmonkies I second Blotted. We know all that, but sometimes our babies still cry (hence the title of our thread). That's what babies do and it can be hard work to try and find out what the cry means.

Hello all! Nice day here. DH (bless him!) got up at 6:30 with DD1 and left me and DD2 to sleep, then when we got up he went back to bed. Both girls currently asleep....but this is where I need your help please!!

A (6 weeks tomorrow) is a terrible sleeper. I know she's little, I know it'll pass etc etc but I need help now, we're all struggling. She very rarely sleeps for more than about 20 minutes at a time unless she's cuddled up to someone (and it nearly always has to be me). I do have her in the sling a lot, but it's just not possible to do that all the time. If she falls asleep on me I try to put her down but then she'll wake again pretty quickly. I can't get her to settle herself to sleep at all - how do I teach/encourage it?

And then there's nights...she's rarely asleep before midnight - really unsettled and unhappy, currently trying gripe water and infacol as she's obviously very windy but is there anything else? Once she's eventually asleep after hours of rocking, shushing, feeding, cuddling and so on she'll sleep for 2 or 3 hours, wakes, feeds, eventually falls asleep on me. This is terrible for my back because she's refusing to feed with me lying down now so I have to feed her sitting up, then fall asleep for hours like that and it's killing me!

Apologies for the begging and taking up valuable chat time .

dandy - at your birth story! I can't believe how you were treated. I hope you get your apology and that you are dealing with the events well.

grumpy - good story. I was quite surprised when the MW told me that A's head is enormous too - 98th centile! . Although I did have a few stitches.