Just had my long post withdrawn as I put a book title in full and that was idiotic as it might end up getting sent to my office or the publishers when the computers do a trawl of all references. So here it is below with detail removed for those who wonder what delights they are missing So no one mention her name or book titles in full please....
Morning all! It's hammering with rain here but it's actually sort of nice, I've got the big windows open and Radio 2 on (drives DP mad but he's at work now so it's on nice and loud ) THANK YOU for all the birthday wishes, it's SO cheering! DD bought me some Dior earrings, which is quite sophisticated for one so young. Tonight is quiet but tomorrow night we are off up to Stafford to watch a dear friend of mine do his show. He's a stand up and he is just coming to the end of a UK tour. He's DD's godfather to be (haven't decided who the others are yet, if any) and is the only person I allowed to visit me in hospital. Ha! We are seeing him in Stafford because that means MiL can babysit, then on Saturday I have this mystery what I assume to be spa day, which is a gift from DD. I need a swimsuit, jogging pants, trainers and warm outdoor clothes. It could be SAS initiation, but who knows. I am spending the day trying to self-tan my vast wobbly acreage so if it IS an SAS training day I may have wasted my time Then next weekend we are driving to France for the weekend - that's my other present.
Verso, of course you aren't a bad mum for going back to work. As long as they are loved, children need happy parents and whatever makes you happy and fulfilled is good, whether that's staying at home or going to work. Look, your DH probably feels quite impotent all in all and I bet this colours what he says or does, and saying that about the night nanny is probably just some sort of wrongheaded attempt to have a bit of control over something. Bet he's not trying to be mean. Above all, though, you're a perfectionist and I am not letting him off the hook here, but perfectionists are hard people to do things for...Get the night nanny, but don't fret if the care isn't as impeccable as the care she gets from you. And I agree with what ZJ said about your DD2 not looking out for food with a night nanny. One day at a time, little treats for yourself, be clear about what you need from others, and don't be so hideously hard on yourself - and try to cut those around you a bit of slack too even if they are quite obviously in the wrong. I know a bit about this. I was annoyed with DP last night over something, and he didn't behave well. Things have been a little hard recently and whilst I am not pretending that none of it's my fault, being totally evenhanded about it I do suspect that blame lies more with DP than with me. I usually believe in vocalising all discontent. I like people to know how I feel, as otherwise how can you progress? But this time I went to bed quietly (not in an outward huff though as that passive aggressive shit is worse even than shouting) and though I was ranting in my mind, I had so much more perspective this morning. I think...you have to accept that people you love get things wrong, forgive them, and take the broadbrush view that they don't mean to do it. Everyone is just a hostage of their own whims and frailties. And that's fine. Let's face it, we're all at it. Kicking at adversity gets you nowhere. I'm NO saint but taking a generous view of things helps ME to keep happy.
Tilly, the urge to call you Ros is at times overwhelming!
ZJ - how is your poor snotty little DD today?
Glad your physio was helpful, Kayz.
Katie - what a downer about your night out...Any chance you could rally by tonight?
And Spot - poor little T really has been through the mill (as have you). Poor little sausage.
Loved the story, Arti. Brilliant. She doesn't come across in interviews and things (unsurprising really, she is in constant pain and gets fed up of being asked the same old stale questions about communism and feminism) when she actually loves men, chocolate, champagne, and gossip. When she won the N Prize, after the 978th bouquet arrived she said "Oh, will NO ONE send me a bottle of champagne? I'm gagging for a drink". She loves to watch the big football tournaments when they are on and likes nosing at famous people in the Ivy when they are probably in fact nosing at HER. She took up Russian in her eighties, which is pretty cool, I think. I know it's sacrilege but I found the GN trying. As I said, big fan of her, not big fan of her work.
Right, have gabbled on far too much as usual. The cricket fixtures beckon!