July 2008 - Anyone tried dressing an Octopuss?

[JODIEwantsanewname]

New thread here.

Pigley, I don't think he doesn't trust me - apart from anything else, I don't have time for an affair! No, he has no respect for me, I think, or for how I feel about things. With the going through my coat thing, it would have been OK if he'd apologised but he didn't - just said I was overreacting and I needed to get some perspective.

well well well all this news its just mind blowing....we are discussing whether to have one last attempt here..... i want to but then i think what about samuels condition....my dh says im a natural mummy and just adapt....thinking hard

SK your a wondefull mummy and pigley all i can say is.....

awww poledra things always seem so horrid honey when there going wrong dont they, why not make some time maybe arrange it and have this talk with your dh so he knows it real the way you feel and not in the heat of the moment....wish you luck ....poledra often when ive had ups and downs on here and sadness with my samuel your words often make me feel better ...wish i could do the same right now for you x

ohhhhhhhhhh ohhhhhhhhhhh ohhhhhhhhhhh
its nearly my due date, and all these possibles...maybe you girls will make me go into labour, hehehe!

im so excited, about time someone, anyone joined me?

Poledra- only you know whether it?s a serious enough set of issues to consider separating over- have you considered couples counselling? Think relate even do it for just 1 person too, maybe you could have a chat with someone there to sort through your feelings and decide what you want to do. Hang in there matey, if he?s any sort of partner you could explain to him how you?re feeling and he will make a joint effort with you to try and get things sorted out.

SK and Pigley- Aaaaaaaaaaargh! Oh it would be great if we all got preggers together! Pigley have you done a test yet? SK you go girl, you sound a really chilled out mum I bet you wouldn?t even notice another one ;)

I?ve still not got my period, it was due last Tuesday BUT as last month was the first period I?ve had since getting pg this last time (good old bf has kept the blighter away) I don?t really know where I am in my cycle. I thought I?d ovulated either on 23rd 30th or even last Friday (!) so it could be too early to test still. Will do another test tomorrow, we?re off on our hols for a week then so I?ll be incommunicado and without access to either a pc or a pg test (don?t fancy asking for one in a French chemist I?ll probably end up with pile cream by mistake). Fingers crossed for all of us!

See M2L we?re trying to catch up! Hope you?re feeling ok, is it really hot with you at the moment? Hope it?s bearable x

Red you'd better let us know the results of the test before you go off for a week!!!

WOW SK you said this would probably happen and that you would re-read all our old ante-natal threads where you grumbled about being pg to put yourself off guess it still wasn't enough!!

I'm thinking about it, perhaps in a couple of months... Pigley you have to tell us STRAIGHT AWAY if you do your test!

Didn't I say a couple of days ago that this was a dangerous age as they're so damn cute we all start thinking about another one?!!!

Poledra - it sounds like that one incident is more of a one step too far kind of thing/indicative of other things he does and how he treats you, maybe you should have a good think about what works/doesn't in your relationship and what can/can't be changed. And then have a big talk with him about it, if you can. After that you'll have at the very least more of an idea (hopefully). Hope you are doing ok.

Red- I agree... you must do another test before you go and tell us

Well I het myself up to do the test after lunch whilst Abigail was having a nap but seemed it wasnt needed as my period came just before
Oh well.. at least I can now keep track of them again. Before Abigail I had a programme on the pc that logged the dates and worked out fertile times etc that was quite helpful so ive dug that out again.
Did have a few tears earlier as I would of loved to be pregnant again. DH was abit disappointed too and has said that we can start properly trying again after the drive is done and the kitchen finished.. so a few months time although I will be rushing to get the kitchen finished asap!
Plus our friends are getting married in wales in April.(quite a distance from us) and DH is the bestman so prob not best timming either being due imminently or with a tiny newborn.

Off to eat cake to make myself feel better!

awww pigley been through that myself a few times too...you get all worked up to do it, and even though you feel scared that you might be its quite crushing when its negative...never mind sweetie you got the fun in ttc now.....

i had a dream last night i had a baby boy called patrick i said to my dh where on earth has that come from he said the boys watching spongebob squarepants.....probably did

Oh bad luck Pigley, you must be disappointed.

SK, I can't believe you're going to TTC again so soon! You're a braver woman than me, that's for sure!

Poledra, sorry to hear you're having problems with dh. I'm married to a workaholic too, and he does quite often complain about the state of the house and occasionally walks around tutting loudly and picking things up. But so far he hasn't been through my coat pockets to tidy them - that sounds quite bizarre to me! I have read that being really picky about tidiness can be a sign of stress though, so it may be stress that's making your dh behave like this, if he's got a demanding job. It's not your fault though, he needs to find a way to cope with it without taking it out on you. Hope he listens when you tell him how you're feeling, and that you can work something out.

We had a fun time at softplay this afternoon - Bryony loved the bouncy castle and was bouncing up and down on her bottom. Walking on it was a bit of a challenge though, she couldn't get her balance at all.

It's our last baby signing class tomorrow, before the summer holidays. Bryony hasn't done any signs for weeks, I don't know whether it's because I'm the only one in the family who ever signs to her or if she's just too young yet. There's a little girl only about 3 months older than her though who does quite a few signs, so I've decided to continue for the next term to give B a bit more of a chance, and also because I really enjoy going and spending some time just focusing on her. At this rate though she'll be talking before she learns to sign, her sisters were both quite chatty by about 18 months.

M2L, hope you don't have to wait too much longer. You'll have to change your name soon too - mama2leahand...!

Pigley - on the negative result but at least like Disney said you can have fun TTC. We are planning on TTC next year so I don't have 2 under 2, our house is a nightmare with lots of stairs so would be a nightmare! But I am already logging AF and planning when would be best to drop sprog No2!! Don't want P to have a sibling with a birthday too close to hers so need to work out how to spread them out!!! Good Luck though when you start

SK - can't believe you are going for No4!! agree with whoever said you sound like a brilliantly relaxed chilled out mummy though!! Good Luck to you too!

It's so exciting everyone talking about the 'next one'!! Think I have been bitten by the baby bug! Am being very restrained and sensible in waiting til next year...very unlike me!

We are all still housebound with the stupid flu. P has been quite out of sorts today temp not gone below 38 all day and hit 40 about an hour ago so we rang GP who has said to ring ambulance if it goes above 45. Thankfully some neurofen seems to have helped a bit. Poor thing can't breathe properly for snot at all and ended up leaving most of her bottle before bed as she was inhaling it whilst trying to gasp for air! Just hoping we all get some sleep but don't think we are out of the woods yet as far as P is concerned!!

I know I know I must be utterly insane.

pigley - aww sorry about the BFN come over and join us on the TTC when you are ready, cake is good we have loads of it in the house, B had it in her hair yesterday

poledra - oh poor you, some good advice on here don't know what to add, please keep posting and hope things aren't too bad for you x

M2L - how exciting are you all ready? bags packed? childcare for Leah sorted out? etc

bebe - poor poor you and wee P, you are having a time of it, hope those nasty bugs go packing.

I have had a busy day was away 8-6 today longest I have ever been apart from B, went to see MIL to say goodbye and spent time with SIL sorting out things, poor thing is in a mess. Tomorrow have to make mad dash to supermarket for party stuff and then for something to wear to funeral as I have nothing that fits, DD1's party, then haircut then DP is going down to hometown for bringing in of the body mass, I'm not going as it is at 6.30pm so by the time it's over and everything he won't be back until late and don't want to ask friend to babysit as she is already doing it for funeral on Saturday.

awww SK what a day, you had

but on a lighter note , did you know you can actually hear the sunshine in your voice so to speak when you talk about ttc....

I am utterly insane but you know waht in light of what has happened this week life is too short, I think you would never regret another little person in your life, I blame B she is just so gorgeous and cute she made me and her Daddy want another one. I'm not letting the sodding SPD win and knowing this will be the very very last time I will have it will help.

Evening all, feeling a little calmer this evening. Minnie, you are so right, these things are 'last straws' really. When I look at what I posted, the things I mention are quite trivial but they pile on top of you.

One of the bigger things I'm struggling with is to do with decorating. We moved into this house 6 years ago, and the downstairs is fine. Two of the upstairs rooms are in desperate need of redecoration. I have been waiting 6 years for it to be done, but it has to be done his way, so I didn't get on and just do it myself. Well, I am now sick of the children sleeping in a horrible bedroom, and also not having the study redecorated into a bedroom for DD1. The problem is that, as the rooms have never been decorated, the furniture for them hasn't been bought either so I am trying to store clothes for 3 children in my room, and it just isn't working. So I've gone ahead and started getting quotes from decorators to do the room. This was what triggered the blazing row, as apparently I need to plan the whole room first (i.e. know what furniture exactly is going into the room ) before I can get the wallpaper stripped and some emulsion put on. So he's now spent most of yesterday evening (apart from when he went to the pub, as nothing gets in the way of Weds night at the pub, not even if the children or I are ill....) and this evening doing a 3D model of the room on his computer .

Anyway, we'll probably come through this because I refuse to allow my marriage to fail. It's not quite what I thought it would be either though - my dad has always cherished my mum, and looked after her (though she is a strong independent woman in her own right, IYSWIM). I don't often feel cherished by DH, and he very rarely tells me he loves me .

Enough about me - I am very about y'all TTC! I'm not doing it, but I do so love little snuggly babas. Why do none of you live near me so I could come and snuggle your LOs instead?

SK, I'll be thinking of you all tomorrow and Saturday. hugs

bebe, what a worry for you with P, I hope she's feeling a bit better soon. I feel your pain after our litany of diseases here!

Been back at work 2 days now - am less tired than when I am at home with the DCs . I might actually manage to cope with this after all...

G'night.

poledra - poor you I know what you mean about the trivial things, no ones relationship is perfect and I suppose over the years we just come to accept the little things but now and again they become too much. With regards the rooms I would just have gone ahead and painted them, sod the row but I am the worlds most impatient person ever.

It's scary thinking about TTC again, on a practical note we will have to build an extension as this house is not big enough and get another car. DD1 is going to school this August, DD2 goes next August so that will help. With the gap between DD1 and 2 being 18 months, then 2 1/2 years to DD2 and 3 I didn't want a huge gap to DB4 hence the kind of rush to squeeze another one in, plus I'm 35 next year too. But life has a way of not working as you quite planned so who knows?

poledra yep i agree and understand about little things building up im the worlds worst about doing it ,its my own fault though i always leave things half finished so its my dh that scurries around doing them [gein]
poor you hardly saying he loves you i cannit imagine that my dh tells me about 20 times a day BUT we are still like love sick teenagers here i leave him notes in his lunch boxes and he leaves me notes by the kettle when i ake up or a trail of post it notes leading to something.....hes crazy im the one thats not that loving to him tbh yes i know he loves me without a doubt but sometimes i find him suffocating me iykwim, he wants to take me to vegas or NY for a 3 day break all i have to do is say yes but i wont cos i wont leave the boys....and this makes him a bit sad and he says im being a bit unfair as we were here before the boys still....true but to me when i became a mummy i guess the boys absorb my life and tbh more than him now...i love him to bits but im in a different direction now.

his answer its 3 days honey not 3 years let me take you maway to show you how special you are to me......yep hes sweet
but see we are different but in a different kinda way....what would you do or anyone
my bet it SK would not leave her girls though/ could be wrong though

my spelling is atrocious must learn to slow down

Well SK, and all you others TTCing, good luck! Although I agree with minnie, it is a dangerous age as they are very lovely and fun to play with now, I have thought about another, but really I do not have room in my life for 4 children. That sounds selfish doesn't it, but I'm struggling now with 3 different children with 3 needs, and splitting myself between 3 kids, and being a wife, and working, and being ME (that always comes last!). So no more babies for me. I'm also pushing 40, so time is ticking on....

I never felt like this after DD2 though, always felt I had another one in me, so now it feels good to know when to stop.....

I look forward to hearing your news though.....

Hi all,

POLEDRA - I remember you posting off and on about feeling about your DH. I alway liken it to a wooden block - every little thing they do chips away at that block of love until there is nothing left.
Really scary facing life without someone who has been there along time for you but I have to say -sometimes people stay with someone because it is a habit and they are too scared of being on their own. Do you have a lot of family and friends around you who would help syupport you and the kids if you did seperate?
Would you consider marriage guidance (would he go?). Best thing I think is to jot down a list of pros and cons of staying/seperating - might sound trivial but it may give you a sense of clarity about things?
Do you argue a lot or are you unloving -would it be better for your kids long term if you did separate? Sometime syou have to take a massive leap of faith and trust in yourself - you might actually find that after the intial shock of it you are much ahppier on your own? Not trying to sway you one way or another but just give you things to think about. You don't want to end up full of resentment in 15 years time about the life you could have had and still feel unloved. I take it you have talked to your Dh about all this? Maybe he just feels resentful of all the pressure he has on him being a 'man' looking after wife, kids etc.

Anyway take your time to think about things - speak to people you trust or see a counsellor to talk things through for yourself. Big hugs and we LOVE youxxxx

As for the rest of you TTC!!!! SK - may I remind you of hyperemesis, SPD 2 littlies and being pg never mind 3!!! How much your DH pissed you off when you were pg etc etc - read back over your posts!!! I promised you I would remind you and I am

I am slightly I really would like another but God I feel old and knackered most of the time. I am not a very patient person and I really NEED time for ME. Also Dh finds it hard to cope at the mo as it is. And he is at Uni for another 2.5 years and I am just sooo ill when pg. Time is short for mwe too as I was 37 a couple of weeks ago. And I am still a fat pie .

Had a job interview yesterday - I think it went really well and I am pretty sure they are going to offer me it next week. I'll be starting 17th August - lecturing at a college which is about 45 mins drive away. It is full -time. I went for the interview and asked about job share so they said they would try to accomodate me but probably not until Januray. I feel really about leaving my 2 to work FT and would be getting a Nanny. But we really need the extra cash and it a perfect job for me - the hols are good etc etc. What do you all think and those of you who do work FT are you too tired/knackerd at the end of the day to enjoy the kids or what? My feeling is to suck it and see. They have just started offering the course I lecture in and it would be an ideal opportunity for me to learn and contribute.

Anway ebnough of my ramblings - My B, SIL, neice, DH's B, SIL, neice and nephew are coming tomorrow so I must go clean

Take care all and I'll be thinking of you SK (big hugs and supporting cuddles).xxx

i like you rumpel say it like it is.....

Where is everyone today?

MIL funeral today was very sad so glad it is over, took girls to wake so everyone could see them some people for the first time, B was lovely in her new dress until she wanted sandwiches and was her usual mucky self, she was also very tired and crabby until she fell asleep on a stranger and then in her pram with her bum and frilly pants in the air. This week she has been such a little grubber, crying for food all the time, have realised why she's not getting night feeds anymore so is hungrier.

Oh and wait for it......

BETHANY SLPET THROUGH THE NIGHT FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT 8pm until I WOKE her at 7 this morning, cannot believe it, thats a week since we put her in her own room and I stopped night feeds, how good is she???

Who was it who was struggling with sleep, Red I know every baby is different but it's worth a try, I was up at 4.30am this morning so not had any benefit yet.

Rumpel - I know I know, I don't get hyperemesis though everything else yes. I told you all to tell me NO if I ever said the P word again but they are so great those little people make all those miserable months seem so worthwhile don't they?

Sorry for the me me me post will catch up you all soon xxx

sk funerals are always better when there over i dont mean that horrible its just there so so draining arnt they, emotionally and physicaly i could not do anymore when my mil died, and its kind of like that part is over and you can grieve properly, bless you all i hope your all ok. xxxx
little b with her frilly knickers in the air....

samuels much better going to bed now i can bath him lie him down awake give him his teddy say night night and he just closes his eyes its lovely BUT he wakes approx 15 times a night mainly for milk any suggestions here?
he doesnt eat a lot in the day at all i struggle to make him open is mouth im sure hes cottoned on to the fact food makes him choke due to his cleft palate? it must hurt him as food gets stuck and he chokes and it all comes out his nose for the next hour or so.
i guess he drinks around 4 or 5 bottles in th day which is 9oz and another 3 full 9oz bottles during the night.
its tiring me out doing this in the night he doesnt cry though just wakes and looks for the bottle and cries when its not there but does he need it ? habit?

Hi all,

just had a quick peek at some of your FB pics etc.

SK - no wonder you would like another - you are very good at it judging by your beautiful girls LOL

DISNEY - Could you try (holds breath for barrage of condemnation) a rusk or something in his bottle at night? I know you are not supposed to but under your circumstances it might be better for him?

Feel rubbish tonight very sore throat and sniffles - must be getting yet another cold! Family arrived today and my B seems to be getting more and more hard work the older he gets - he is so moody and sullen!

Meeting my friends at softplay tomorrow but will try to update photos on FB tomorrow am. Mybig boy is getting more and more gorgeous as time goes on (biased Mummy emoticon)

rumpel good idea actually he has special bottles there plastic and squishy so i can squeeze as he cant suck to get the milk out, in the night he knows if he lies on his back it drips out....
i know its not reccomended to do it but hes not a tiny baby and i guess its worth a try, anything to fill his little tummy up.

meant to add rumpel sorry

hope you feel better soon and big hugs xxxx

do you have any pics of your ds on fb actually il go take a peek