November 08 - Say it LOUD.......We're shades of GINGER and PROUD :0)

[LackaDAISYcal]

This do??????

nobody's fault

pinky sorry your having a rubbish day, maybe like hana says things will get worse before getting better!? Heres hoping they so soon tho.

I am going to put Ewan in his moses basket when i go to bed, otherwise i will not sleep a wink for worrying about him.

Oh yes I meant to say, thanks for that post, Hana I know what you mean about the anger, too.

I have a feeling it's going to be a long process for me, too. But I am heartened by the thought that it's clearly worked well for others.

I'm still half in denial about it all. Not sure how many peopleare going to have to tell me it's not my fault/ in my own heaD before I believe them.

Choc bless I still miss my DS- I love it when we 'sleepwalks' in for a cuddle!

Thanks for all the well wishes everyone. The worst of it seems to have passed.

I don't exactly blame myself (or ff) for her being unwell, it's just that she doesn't seem happy when feeding. She's pushing the bottle away and is only taking a couple of oz at a time but she guzzled all of the sachets which had to be made up in 7oz of water

vbab I know Bramley. I moved there from Brecks when I was 14 and lived there right up until I moved to Wombwell. I would def be interested in coming to the meet although I feel like a bit of a fraud as I haven't been posting very much

daisy I stopped bf after about a week and continued to express for about another week. I think a lot of this comes down to the fact that I just feel I gave up too soon IYSWIM. I was just not in a good place for the first few weeks as my blood pressure was still being monitored everyday (suspected pre-eclampsia) and I was told I may be readmitted. It took weeks to come down. My iron count was also so low that I was 0.2 away from a blood transfusion. As much as my family was supportive, they didn't like to see the pressure I was putting myself under and that I was getting very 'down' about not getting much milk. A got so distressed everytime she was put to the breast too. It all just feels like excuses though

The good news is that I have expressed tonight and got quite a bit given how long it's been. A also seemed content to cuddle up to me and even took a few drops straight from the nipple although she didn't latch on. I'm not going to push it. The plan is just to relax and look at every drop she gets as a bonus

Sorry, that turned out to be an epic ME post

phee glad your sounding much more positive about things!
I completely understand about the bf, I feel I gave up too early too. I think if I was able to do it now then i could cope with the initial problems that goes with it. I like you was a bit all over the place the 1st couple weeks and just felt it was one extra thing I didn't have control over!
My little man is doing fine on ff and next time I will be more prepared!

Right off to bed, hope everyone has a good weekend
X

phee - WOW Brecks then Bramley. Wouldnt it be weird if we met up and thought "s**t I know you but cant think why". Dont worry about not posting much we will be able to catch up in person . Looking at your profile I noticed you are 26. My sister is 27 this year maybe you were in the same year at Wickersley Comprehensive? I've just turned 31 so a million years older than you. Feel free to see if you recognise me by looking at my profile pics you might then decide not to meet .

Have decided to abandon all of my principles and get a cleaner. Apologies to those already with one, just for myself I have always felt like it wasn't something I would ever do. I feel pretty uncomfortable about doing it, maybe because I used to be one myself. I always would say "why get someone else to clean up after me? I'll do it myself". In fact in the way that ex-smokers (I'm one) can feel very strongly about not smoking, I think I was the most outspoken on the subject of why we shouldn't employ cleaners!

My house isn't just untidy, it's unclean, and it's making me really stressed. I just don't have enough hours in the day to do it now. I feel myself so torn ( as I said earlier in the week)trying to spend time with DS1 and DS2 as well as M. And there's DH as well, trying to get a look in. I haven't sat down at all today until about half an hour ago, and yet not one bit of cleaning has been done today, apart from swiping my finger across the telly screen to remove the dirt. Don't think that counts!

I am absolutely sure that my kids come first and although I look (sort of ) longingly at the hoover whilst playing the 32nd game of pictureka with DS2, I know that I won't be looking back in 10 years time and say "gosh I wish I'd spent more time with my hoover and less playing games with my kids" IYSWIM?? It's bad enough wondering whether or not I'm doing this parenting lark right or not, but at least I'm doing it.

I sat up in bed feeding M at 5am this morning, going over events of the day. Now there are hundreds of little incidents I could look back on and wonder whether or not I got them right or not, but I know that I can't always get it right. My f-i-l has this saying "children grow up despite of and because of their parents" and I am slowly beginning to understand what he means. At the end of the day, I want to leave my kids with as little emotional baggage as possible, but I know realistically, due to my own (rubbish) upbringing, I am going to bring my own emotional baggage into parenting. What I want to be able to do is know that I did my best, not only to improve their lives, but my own as well. Does any of this make any sense, or maybe I'm just rambling through a fog of tiredness..???

Anyhow, as guilty as I feel ( no wonder I'm a catholic, the guilt thing is the thing I do best)I am getting a cleaner, whether deep down I like it or not!

OMG , huge apologies for huge ME post!! Love to all.

Oh, and let me add this. I do thank God that the biggest stress in my life at the moment is my dirty house, when around me there are people properly suffering. My heart goes out to fellow Nov08 MNetters having a difficult time, I think of people like Jade unlikely to see her kids grow up, and actually I don't have much to moan at.

Right, am definitely going to shut up now. Sorry.

Fudge I am with you. DH nd I are having an increasing number of discussions around wether or not we can afford a cleaner. I am just about managing to put laundry away at the mo.

Choc Thank you for your kind words earlier. Sorry I'm a bit all over the place at the mo.

phee glad things are improving.

Has anyone seen that the May 2008 group are only on their third thread - are we just ultra chatty???

Hey everyone - hope you are all having a good weekend

Fudge wow, get a cleaner!! I can understand where you are coming from but if you can afford it and it gives you more time to spend with your boys then get one - although I can see it may feel a bit 'funny' given you used to be a cleaner

Well I think Pinky has swung it - we will meet at that play area near Meadowhall so she can come Phee don't worry about not posting regularly - as if we care about that! Would just be lovely to meet you and your little one We are going over to my parents as my bro, gf and DS are coming down from Scotland and we hardly ever see them - it is my bro's birthday on the Saturday so my mum wants to have a birthday party for him with all her GC there so my sis and her 3 are going over aswell!

Pinky hope you are feeling better today. I guess it is going to take a long time to deal with the issues and no doubt there will be backward steps aswell as huge strides forward - the important thing is that you are dealing with it

Chocolategal how did the evening go? I remember that feeling when DS1 first went into his cot after being in our room for 6 months - I felt so lost and worried - in fact, I felt that way this week when I started putting Sam upstairs to bed at 7 - with DH being away aswell, it suddenly felt very lonely downstairs!

Right, better go and watch the footy - come on Chelsea

Hey and as I speak, we score

Afternoon.

Wondering if anyone can help?

Yesterday i noticed white flake like spots on DS tongue and suspected Thrush. This morning there was more spots so i called the out of hours GP who confimred this and has supplied us with drops to help it clear up. All great apart from that my nipples (right one in particular) have been a little sore for a few days now. I thought that Ds had been feeding more recently and had just made me a little sore but now i'm wondering whether i have thrush too? My nipps are quite tingly and itchy . Anyway, when i mentioned this to the doctor this morning, he assured me that there was no link between ds's thrush and my itchy/tingly nipples. I'm just seeking advice as i'm sure i read somewhere that if LO has thrush then both mother and child need to be treated to stop it reaccuring? Does anybody have any other info about this?

Thanks

Choco Oscar been in his own room for two weeks now. He is 16 weeks and we felt the time was right as we were waking him up coming to bed/turning over etc and he was waking us up as he is such a noisy sleeper. Everybody sleeping much better these days

Afternoon, looks like everyone is off enjoying the weekend it's quiet on here.
Sorry don't have any answers for you lolabella I'm sure someone will be on soon that can help though! However I would have thought if you weren't both treated you would keep reinfecting each other!?
Will wait to see what all the knowledgable ladies here say

E was fine in his cot last night & slept soundly in it until I lifted him into his Moses basket at 11.30pm when i went to bed, think I will do this for another couple weeks then leave him in it all night.

Did you get the result you wanted ceebee?
yep Choco I think we are ultra chatty!!

choc we moved M into his own room when he was 10 weeks, it was earlier than planned but like lola we were waking him up and he was v noisy (and I am a v light sleeper). M was absolutely fine but of course I was up all night the first night worrying!

lola i am sure the wise ones will proffer sone good advice soon on the thrush thang. poor you and oscar.

chocgal glad E was ok in cot. your plan of gradually moving to his own room sounds sensible. i am hanging on for as long as she will squeeze into the moses...then i will cut twoholes in the bottom ....

little plum slept from 7pm til 5am last night, so v.happy. was so refreshed i went for run along the river this morning.
DH been at footie all day, and plum and i preparing for dinner party tonight. stress!

right - bathtime - hope u all have good evenings.

pinky hope u r feeling better...

Hi everyone! Have been around but laying low ? nothing insightful or relevant to contribute! However, very interested in the parenting discussion ? I?m still on weaning, parenting next on my list to research! For those with older DCs who want to be different to their parents ? is it a constant conscious thing? I don?t know the background on everyone?s personal experiences so apologies in advance if I?m being insensitive but just wondering as I want to be different to my parents?not that my childhood was necessarily bad?but do you find in certain situations or day to day you have to stop and reassess lest you just do what your parents might have done? Or do you automatically react/act differently? Hope that makes sense?

Fudge ? don?t feel guilty about the cleaner! We have had one for a while ? long before we had M?we were both working long hours and then spending time on weekends cleaning?and inevitably fighting about it! If you can afford it, I think it?s worth every cent. Even if it?s once every 2 weeks! If it frees you up to spend more time with your 3 kids, you really shouldn?t feel guilty!

Monkey ? envious of your run today! Such a beautiful day in London ? I was thinking I would do the same but realized I need to get a new sports bra ? my boobs are currently about 3 cup sizes bigger than they used to be!

We went to visit a prospective childcare place yesterday?oh the guilt! It?s lovely and all but feel terrible?yesterday was happy that they have fantastic things like a sensory room but today feel awful that I won?t be the one doing every new thing with my little boy. It's all a trade-off I guess but now assessing all my options carefully...

Minirosa will be staying in our room for a wee while as dd1 is quite posessive about the bedroom - we made a big fuss about it when I was pg and also she says that minirosa can't sleep in a big bed as she doesn't have any teeth !!!! When minirosa starts going through the night then we will think about it but it won't be until she is at least 6 mths ( probably much later - dd 1 diddn't go into her own room until she was 2!)
Cant help re the thrush but my nips are always itchy and tingly / stingy esp when MR us due a feed.
Hope you are all having a good weekend.... Still really cold here .

lola, you're right; you both need to be treated, but the good news is that you can use canesten cream on your nips if you have any in the house; apply after each feed and give your nips a wipe before the next feed. You can also use daktarin oral gel on your nips and then don't have to wash it off, but it is very icky sticky!!

The problem with thrush is if it gets into your milk ducts, then it causes pain deep within your boobs starting towards the end of a feed and hanging about for some time afterwards, often with intermittent stabbing pains going into your armpits. If that's the case you need a course of oral fluconazole, but GPs are loathe to prescribe it. If you have a good HV, it can help to get her on side.

oh, and hello everyone

Wish I had been enjoying the weekend; we have been catching up on the housework. No cleaner here as we just can't afford it. If I ever get back to work though, it will be a priority.

hello again.

its dd3 4th birthday today, looking back at her baby pics has made me very broody. but lack of sleepness nights makes even thinking about it a no-no lol.

sophie is still not well. she has a couigh she cant shift. its been over 2 weeks now. GP said it could take that long or longer to shift it as she cant cough it all up effectively. if no better mid-week i am taking her back to the docs again.

Btw when do babies eyes change from that bluey colour to their 'real' colour if you know what i mean? dd's 1,2+3 were born with brown eyes, but sophies are still blue. sorry if i've asked before but am so tired i cant remember

my blue eyed girl

Misdee Sophie is gorgeous sorry to hear she is unwell, hope the cough passes soon

Bit of a quandry about W. he has been v.v. fussy feeding and sicky. He seems out of sorts - drooling and rubbing his gums on his knukles. His dry skin/ exzema (cannot spell) has got worse and he is not sleeping/ napping well. I have infacol, gaviscon (infant) and calpol. Do I give him anything? He is in bed now but he did not feed well (we had a bath and he dropped off whilst feeding) He is going to be starving when he wakes up and I feel so guilty that I didn't encourage him to feed more but he has been so unsettled all day I was grateful of the break
so when he wakes up, if he is still outofsorts, what should I give him, if anything?

soz for the 'me-ness' of this post

Morning everyone, not posted for a while, but have been reading, i promise!!1

Barbaree you should invest in some nelson's teetha and ashton and parsons powder. Both are natural and very effective. The Nelsons is specifically for teething, and the ashton and parsons, is for general unsettled-ness. I very rarely give Calpol unless temperature and can guarantee these are a natural effective treatement. I think obs or lacks has mentioned them before as well. Hope W had a good night.

Tiger is still in the room with us, and will remain so for the forseeable future! She has been in a travel cot though from Day 1, so whilst it is not as big as her cot, it is still plenty big enough. I am a light sleeper though and even though she wakes me with her grunting/snorting a few times a night, it is no different to DH doing the same, and I am too scared of cot death to put her in her own room until at least 6 months.

Does anyone else have an irrational fear concerning their kids? I have 2, choking and cot death. I still cut DS1 grapes into 1/4 and he is 6 this year. Plus, when they have steak they get it cut very small. I can remember choking as a child and being super scared, and I am sure this is where my fear comes from.

As for cleaner, we have one. Have done since DS1 was a baby - she is a godsend and does all the "deep cleaning" whilst i just maintain. i am houseproud but have a very busy life, and it is enough of a chore to do a wash everyday, and keep the house clean chasing after the kids and DH. She does 3 hours a week and costs £21.

We also have a blue eyed girl missdee. Both DS's were born with blue eyes, but changed by the time they were 6 months. We too are waiting to see what she will end up like!

Hope everyone else is enjoying their weekends!

Thanks Daisy didn't know i could treat it with Canestan. Will get some today. Is it possible that i can treat myself with this and hope that the thrush doesn't effect my milk ducts? I don't have the stabbing pain you describe but i do have a persistant dull tingly feel in my right breast.

Barbareebaa is it possible that W was overtired? This is exatcly how Oscar is when he needs a good sleep. He becomes fussy on the breast, and screams. He chews his hand too but i think it is a comfort thing. Hope he went down for you well last night anyway

help
this boy is constantly on the verge of screaming. in fact have let him go for it now. am exhausted from trying to comfort him. don't think he has temperature - had jabs on weds. perhaps is just a grumpy phase ? can't even soothe with boobs. don't think overtired (me - i am tho!) will lokk up the parsons remedy- thanks dozy

gah! dh not answwering phone - is at work.