June '07...and they're off!

[deckthehallswithboughsofholly]

Coooeeee!!!

ooooh, that looks like just the thing for the back of the Disco for those impromptu picnic stops

I'm off!

hi mhc.....bye mhc

Morning!
Oooo, gin Knew I'd miss something good going to bed early. Jammy [hearts] gin.

Another good night One wake up call at 3.30 for feeding, then slept through until 6.30, when we got up (well DH is still in bed). Maybe I was (unintentionally) starving the poor mite all along ?

Morning
Just a fleeting visit as getting my monkeys ready for a playgroup. Last time I went DS totally embarrassed me with a tantrum. It was so bad I had to leave in the middle of song time.

I am remembering ALL these moments so when he is 16 I am going to act like a loon in front of his mates. I am mean.

DD had a winge at 5am and then woke at 7am. YAH!!! I feel almost refreshed.

Bye

Morning all

Bit of a shit night chez bumper. DH and I had a huge row. I had mentioned that I felt uncomfortable with him seeing me naked, and I wasn't sure why as I have NEVER felt like that before, even when I was at my fattest. He said how can I make it better? I said he would just have be patient with me. He said "I know, I have been patient with you" and I flipped and was like "oh so you are doing me a big faviour are you?" and it went on like that. He said hadn't I even considered his feelings and I said TBH no, I'm dealing with so much right now and so what he doesn't get to have sex a few times? That's nothing compared to what I've been through. But he got so upset and angry at me for not even thinking about him, saying he'd become irrelevant in my life. he said he was disappointed in me (god that's the worst, I felt like I was being told off).

I told him he he could never understand what I went through. He still maintains that it (i.e. labour) wasn't that bad, he was there and saw me deal with it really well so I must be distorting it in my own head. I also told him I felt my body had been ravaged by pregnancy and labour but he said I'm distorting that too, and if I lost a bit of weight and did a bit of exercise my body would go back to what it was like pre-pg (not true ). Oh god it was a horrible fight, and some how it seemed although I was in the wrong. He was right, I have been v selfish, I've not given him much affection, and it is all about me at the moment. But I'm really struggling and it's "all about me" because I need me to be ok for the baby.

We kinda sorted things out, but I don't know where we go from here. The problem is DH doesn't and won't speak to anyone else, but I have you guys, so I know how I am feeling is normal. But he thinks he's been really good, given me space and not mentioned sex or anything but I should be over it now and life should be getting back to normal. I just don't know what to do to take things forward. And now, because we have had this fight if I am affectionate towards him I will feel like I am doing it out of duty and that isn't what I want, I need to do it in my own time, but apparently 5 months is long enough.

morning all

fairy don't worry about buggy fit I am not there as it is p**sng down I am not that hardcore re club med I would look on tripadvisor I have found the reviews on there to be pretty accurate so always look there before I book something

morning els jammy I had a good night too fed at 3 and 6 so excellent for us beats every 2 hrs anyway

am off out tonight have organised for a babysitter every other thurs so dh and I can go out once a fortnight we are going for chinese tonight mmmmm

right off to do chores back later

Well a bad night here. I was up til 1 trying to do internet shopping over my crappy connection, then the baby woke up. Just managed to get him back to sleep and DD woke up with a really horrible cough. She couldn't go back to sleep and ended up coming in with me just as I was dropping off. When I was finally getting back to sleep the baby woke screaming inexplicably. At least we all slept late, so preschool is off again for DD, she's not coughing anymore but it was a really horrible deep chesty cough, I wonder where it came from?

Oh Bumper, no advice really but I really feel for both of you. I know what you mean about feeling totally unsexy. And babies are so all consuming, but it will pass and your body will get back to some kind of normality eventually. In the meantime do you have someone who could look after the bby for you while you get some time to go out for a meal or something?

Aw, Bumper, that sounds horrible. I don't know what to say, but I do sympathise with a lot of what you're feeling. Some of it is how I've been feeling too. I'm only now beginning to get teh odd glimmer of libido back, but unfortnately when I do it often coincides with a moan from DH, so again it then looks like I'm just trying to show a sense of duty if I follow it up in any way. Can't win can we? I hope you two manage to smoothe things over and go forwards OK, do come and moan either here or by email if you need to though (though I realise it's not necessarily a subject you want to vent too much about). As for 5 months being long enough - it's not just time from birth though, I think it should be remembered that through those montrhs there has been lack of sleep, BF, new responsibilities, etc etc to cope with - all emotionally and physically demanding

Eeeew!
I just gave DD a kiss on the cheek and she sicked up pureed apple all over my neck and cleavage.

Thanks guys. Do you think I am being selfish? Or more to the point, am I allowed to be selfish at the moment? I tried explaining to DH that if I wasn't thinking about his feelings it's because I am struggling with everything that is going on, and when you are struggling you often do only think about yourself, it's not a reflection on him, it's because of how I am feeling.

On a funnier note, I laughed when norty said about DD snogging her face coz that's exactly what DD does to me!

Dear Bumper, at least you know it is perfectly normal. I really do think that our sex drive won't return properly until the bf slows down. Its Mother Nature, she tells us we've just had a baby, we are feeding it and as we can't get pregnanty, we don't need sex. And your body just isn't your own with these milky mammories.

Ask him for another month of his patience. you might find that when food takes over from milk things return a bit more to 'normal'. And don't forget, you ARE in size 10 jeans

bumper, I don't know what to suggest, but have some {{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}.

Is he making an effort to help you feel sexy? wining and dining, chocolates, some nice lingerie. It's a two way street, so he needs to help you get your groove back. I think men forget that we can't just turn it off and on like a switch in the same way that they can.

I must admit, I feel about as sexy as a potato at the moment, and never go near my DH lest he thinks it's an invitation thankfully with him working away, it isn't too hard to avoid him.

I have at least 8 farking dummies that I know of in this house....so why can't I bloody sodding effing find one...aaaaarrrrrrggggghhhhh

just found five......stuck between the cot frame and the wall...result

LOL Daisy!

she's still not sleeping....but at least the dummy is keeping her entertained as she takes it in and out and sings at it

She just won't sleep during the day, unless we're out and about. Tis very wearing as I can't get anything done in the house (well, that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it )

I had an electrician in this morning to fix the damage caused when DH drilled into a mains cable at the weekend . Thankfully a cheap repair but having 2 strange men in banging and drilling (f'nah, f'nah!) while she was trying to feed upset DD.

Also got a tree surgeon coming later to give a quote. Anyone know what is reasonable to fell a tree (pear tree if that makes any difference) or to prune a tree (lilac)?

same here mhc....she snoozes whilst feeding, but wakes up as soon as i put her down. she is so tired and grumpy and rubs her eyes, but will not settle

another one here sleeping on lap. We went through a spell of trying to get her to nap in cot by day, and mihgt try again once better night sleeping is fully established, but for now she is on me. Don't mind really, except I could do with a drink, but she rarely naps for more than 30-40 mins so think I'll survive