September 2014 - Babies turn 1!

[lilone1234]

First birthdays are starting to arrive and our babies are becoming toddlers! What will the next year have in store?

Ooooh how exciting! Does hr/she have a name?

E is still asleep!

Oh fate, you must be so excited! I hope puppy settles in well and quickly.

Yesterday, on the bank holiday DD woke early. This morning she slept in until 6.40. So did we! Which was bliss, other than DH needing to leave for work at 6.45!

Yay for the new puppy Fate, hope s/he settles in well.

This is Brodie. She's a cocker spaniel and gorgeous! She's settling well.

Toddler + Puppy, that should be interesting!

Aw, she is gorgeous! Good luck with the Toddler, Puppy combination

Good luck Fate. She is very sweet, but I don't envy you!

Have been trying to get my dog and DB's new puppy together to make friends but my dog does not like other dogs and his dog (Labrador pup) is far too boisterous. They are not getting on. Pup also knocked DD over and left a huge scratch on her head! Quite a head ache really as will probably need to find someone else to take her while we are away later this year now.

Aw FATE she's beautiful! Enjoy the puppy stage. I bet the children love her.

Does anyone else despair of getting your los to walk holding hands? DD throws HUGE tantrums if I try holding hands or reins. I keep thinking something will shift developmentally and she'll suddenly get it but no such luck so far!

Omg Fate don't you just want to cuddle her ALL day?!

Team yay for a lie in!! DS slept in today until 7.50 when I had to wake him because this is the one day of the school holidays when I actually had to work. Guarantee tomorrow that he'll be up at 6am.

Apples I can't help sorry, DS seems to like to hold my hand. But I wonder if it's where he walked so late that actually he's still quite wobbly so likes the stability. Also he's a mummy's boy and tbh a bit of a wuss so never wants to venture far!

Does anyone else have a partner that has quite a high stress job? This is massively off topic but I'm struggling to support DH at the moment and I'm quite worried about him. Just wondering if anyone has any tips they can share, or similar experiences really. It's now impacting on family life so I'd really like to help him if I can .

Yup, my DH has a high stress job! My job is usually busy, but not too stressful, which is good! We have developed a bit of a routine that's helps him, and me when needed, get it all out of his system. DD goes to bed, then I cook (my main method of relaxing!) whilst he potters around the kitchen getting little jobs done and we talk about our day. Once dinner is served we rarely talk about work stuff, otherwise it is all we ever talk about!

Lilly - is your husband a talker or a quiet brooder? DH is quite a chatterbox (where DD gets it from I guess!), so chatting about stuff usually works for him. When things are really tough at work he has to do something physical, so a long walk or a bike ride.

Also, we make sure we have a monthly date night, which is essential for both of our sanity

Hope that helps?

Apples - I have the same hand holding problem. At the mo I'm only getting her to when it's necessary (walking near a road, hazard approaching etc) with lots of praise but I don't drag it out to try and avoid tantrum. Too young to understand why they need to do it and consequences really so I'm just going for praise and distraction! Can be such a pain though!

DS can be good at hand holding when he wants to! He prefers to walk next to the pushchair and hold onto the side of it. We can steer our pushchair one handed (my mum insisted on buying a stroller for her house but cant push it one handedly) and I put reins on him so I've 'got' him if he were to dart. He walks really nicely holding onto the pushchair so we let him do it.

Bedtimes are easier these days, no idea how or why but we are enjoying it for as long as it lasts!

DS is looked after by grandparents but does socialise/go to groups, he has been fine but Ive never been ill so many times in my life! DH and I caught a sickness bug on Monday evening so have been off work and Im a bit worried about what might be said when I go back. I cant be the only one surely?

Apples, could you try holding her wrist rather than her hand, if she's having a moment? I find coat hoods a useful thing to loosely hold on to when out too. At this age though I would probably just carry (or pushchair) if hand holding was being refused.

Lilly, I hope your DH is OK. My DH doesn't have an excessively stressful job, but did go through a stressful time at work just after DD was born. It was a tough time for him and took a good year to recover from. The best advise I can give you is to look after yourself. If your DH needs extra support from you, you need the relaxation yourself so that you have those extra reserves to deal with it all. "You can't pour from an empty cup" and all that.

Polka - The other day my DH was telling me HR authorised compassionate leave for one of his employees on the basis that her cat was ill. Her cat!! She had argued that parents get time off when their children were ill and her cat was like her baby (she is childless). So if people get time off for poorly pets, then you should have no problems.

Wow, time off for a poorly cat! In DHs last job he was refused compassionate leave to attend the funeral of a close family member of mine. He was told, unless it is your partner, child or parent, it has to be annual leave.

I have twins for DD, although I know many people don't like them. She also has a dummy and watches CBeebies - I'm clearly an awful mummy

A poorly cat! That's incredible.

A walks fine on his reins most of the time, but he likes to wander down peoples drives etc and will randomly sit down . He still isnt too keen going up and down steps so at the moment that seems to stop him running onto the road unless there is a dropped kerb. He is very quick when he wants to be though. My parents took him for a walk at the weekend and took his reins off at one point and he off down the road. Luckily they live in a very quiet village and my dad caught up with him quite quickly!

Lily hope your DH is ok. My DH hates his current job and was getting very stressed about it. It is hard to listen to him and not actually be able to do anything about it. Luckily he starts a new job in two weeks and since he knows he is leaving the current place he is much more relaxed. As Fate said, make sure you look after yourself as well though

I have twins?! Reins!!!

Stupid autocorrect

Thank you team yes your post was helpful. Sometimes he wants to talk about work and other times he doesn't at all. I think we probably talk about work too much to be honest. We did have a good conversation about if his job was really worth it though, and he wants to get through this bad patch first and then talk about it again. I will look after myself as advised and juts make sure that he is getting plenty of time with DS, I can sacrifice time with me if it means he sees DS.

I am away for a weekend with my friends, and it's the longest DS and I will have been apart. We've done 24 hours before. But this will be four days, three nights. I cried my heart out when I left this morning. I'm not very good at being away anyway, I think I mentioned before that I do get terrible anxiety. And my anxiety is massively worsened by sleeping away from home. With that and missing my boy it's not going too well so far. Hopefully I will get some sleep tonight and tomorrow will be a better day.

What a negative post...sorry!

Have a lovely weekend Lilly, it must be hard being away from home for so long, but try to enjoy it. And think about how good it is for your DH to spend some quality time with DS. I bet they are having a great time (I hope I am not making things worse for you with this post?).

Oh not at all Cumbrian they had a great day yesterday and I'm sure today will be much the same! I'm not worried about DS at all, it's just the sheer heartache at being apart!

Thread is filling up so I've started a new one here! www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/2605536-September-2014-Toddlers-Tantrums?watched=1

Lilly, I hope you manage to enjoy the rest of your weekend. So difficult to be apart from your baby but important to recharge the batteries too! I've got my first night away from DD next weekend though for a hen weekend and I know I'll feel the same as you!