The 11th Gemini bus - Trudging through the terrible twos

[AGnu]

Ahh bugger as Frus' mum would say. That really bites. I'm sorry to hear that AF showed up for you again.

Thanks for the input. She did write back and said "Don't worry about it. I know. I've known her for years and we invited her to volunteer for admin tasks with the other office". So phew. Still feel like a total baffoon, but at least that's over.

How's the weather over there? It's been unseasonably warm here and now we projected to drop down to 0 C by Saturday so it feel super duper extra cold now!

Oh pear That wasn't the news I wanted to read from you. Don't give up though you and dh are doing so fab with you healthy changes it will happen!!
I agree down thread with talks on pears groups. He may well enjoy some nursery time but also what about new more challenging groups? Tiger had allready started gymnastics by this age and loved it she was full on and indipendant? She still goes now. Does he go swimming or anything like that?
Funnily enough kitten is totally different. She asks for help being fed wants to be carried around. We had her hair cut into a bob last night and when I said shall we go to have your hair cut she said. ." I not cry mummy" and I said "no it doesn't hurt and your a big girl " to which she replied " no I a baby " lol she's just not having it!!!
She has her 2.5yr check in a few weeks so will mention her poo issues and maybe her some ideas on how to help make toluet training seem to be fun seen as she doesn't want to be grown up
Agnu great to hear you enjoyed your me time and it's hopefully not put you off and future opportunities too
Lor how are you feeling now? Have we heard nothing from lib? She must be seriously over due now no? I'm sure she said she was due a few weeks back
Being good to hear the email got rectified, sounds like pear was right and even though she may be a friend they know there was truth in it. Did you guys not get on or did you feel she's trying to vie for your job?
Sounds like your health kicks are doing wonders for you and dh too really sounds like your relationship is really strong and in a good place! I'm jeleous! I'm so tired right now working 4 long days sucks and have no time to fix the new problems that are arising with house, we too have had tiles come off in bathroom thanks to kids being mad with water and now marks in the ceiling below
So many jobs to do and I hate not having the time or money to just do them!
Frus did you resolve dh fowl argumentative mood? How is ds feeling now?

Thanks for the gaff support ladies! I appreciate being able to come on here and just let it all hang out.

M is a total crab today. She refused a nap at "nap time" and is now trying to nod off at 4 in the afternoon-which would just result in a really ridiculous bedtime and her staying up super late so we are now what you would call the witching hours at our house DH is heading to DS1's teacher conference tonight so it's me vs. the monsters. FUN.

Aww kitty if it wasn't for us desperately TTC no2 we would also be in your shoes with wine and snacks on the couch every evening Not saying that's what you do but you know what I mean!! Do you normally go very healthy come January? That is scarily round the corner!!

I have admittedly kind of had the last two days off as I've been in a dark place but still mainly just eating more rather then gorging on sugar so I don't think I've done too much damage. Back on the wagon now though...boring I am so very proud of DH for loosing 5lbs in 2 weeks. That and all the vitamins I am pumping into him has to help!!

I've got my scan on Monday. We've been told that if the scan shows nothing then we're far far down the waiting list for further tests because we have a child. It makes sense but it also scares me. I'm now starting to feel like the scan is going to come back clear and I'm going to end up feeling like a deflated balloon with no answer. I don't want the answer to be PCOS but I also just want an answer. It's not a win win situation!! I just have to wait. Can't wait for Monday to be over!!

Frus - wouldn't it be nice if you could just have a remote control with DH's? I'd love a pause button! It would be great to press pause on all the petty arguments when you just don't have the energy or better still press delete

Is it Black Friday today?

No idea on Black Friday but maybe next week? Not heard anything today but would you girls judge if I put up my tree this weekend?
I'm not sure what is the best outcome Monday pear but atleast you are on your way to answers and that atleast is something
I don't blame you one bit for the tipple off the wagon, I've still not climbed back on yet

Give it a week pear. Thanksgiving is next Thurs... so let the Xmas shopping mayhem begin! We usually wait until after Thanksgiving to put up our Christmas stuff too. No judgement kitty! There are people who have put up their outside lights and everything a couple of weeks ago!

pear that does sound like a very hard place to be in. Of course you don't want the diagnosis, but often diagnoses come with plans on how to overcome them and that can be a lot easier than just getting a "I don't really know" from a doctor. Wishing you the best with the scan.

Also oh well on the healthy eating break. It happens to us all!

So, scan showed nothing. Great news but I'm now back in the dark. The waiting list to have further help on the NHS is so long I could be waiting until Summer. I have no choice other then to park all my "thoughts" and see what the next few months brings. I haven't been able to talk to my DH yet but I suspect he will want to delay private testing until Easter giving us time to save. It makes sense. I'm not going to "relax" (who could after 1.5 years of trying) but I'll try and give our bodies a chance after all the changes and effort we're putting into our lifestyles. It's not going to take effect overnight....I get that. So there we go! Managed to buy 4 more Christmas presents today. That's a positive

Ahh pear I know it feels like limbo now but that really is a positive. After all to conceive naturally without help is so much better then going down any ivf route or medical plan. Although it would feel like a plan there is ofcourse no guarentee it would work and is still a costly timely affair. Although there's no answer yet it's definetly a positive to not find anything wrong. My dd1 was conceived after around 20 months of trying at Xmas. Getting drunk and thinking sis it this month defo helped I think. Itl be my Xmas wish for you

That's really frustrating pear! Hopefully it means there's no real/concerning reason why it hasn't happened yet. Maybe Christmas will be a good distraction for you - something else to focus on.

What are you getting for bpear? Will you be up at silly o'clock for the Next sale this year? I can't imagine anything worse, personally but then I can't stand shopping in the middle of the day on a weekday when it's quiet in the shops!

I can't imagine anything better

Thank you ladies love your positiveness! Yes, Kitty you're absolutely right. I seriously could not think of anything worse then having to go down the IVF route. It must be so insanely hard to cope with, I can't even imagine so I am so so grateful that the hospital didn't find anything wrong with my ovaries this month. I was on a PCOS thread when I convinced myself that I have it and the discussion on this thread is just heartbreaking to read. I've drawn myself away now as obviously it's not healthy for me to be meditating on PCOS when we don't know for sure. It's best just to focus on being healthy like you say A friend of mind has just had a second baby and is sending me very "rub it in your face" text messages about how happy she is and how well it's all going. I found this very very hard to cope with last week and DH agreed with me that it's insanely selfish of her. I've already congratulated her and sent my happy wishes and celebrated at her baby shower with joy but I didn't expect such gloating to come back to me so it was a bit of a shock. However, I do remember how when you have a baby you feel like you're on cloud 9 etc so I'm just letting it go over my head as much as possible. Lucky she is not a close friend so I've chosen not to visit her this week as I will see her baby at a party the following week anyway. She didn't visit me when I had bpear but always makes such a fuss about wanting her own visitors. She's one of those people if you know what I mean

I still haven't done any exercise because I've damaged my shoulder lifting up my 2.5 stone son He insists on having cuddles before nap and bedtime and is just generally being a bit of a pickle about it. I have had thoughts about moving him into a big bed to solve the lifting issues but I am just not ready for all the other problems it will cause

Agnu - ooooo the Next sales! I really hope I can go this year! It's my one chance to shop like a maniac like the old days. We've tried very hard not to spoil bpear this year. I think I've failed thanks to Amazon I have brought him practical things though. He's got a few new books from TKMAxz love their bargain books because I rarely give him new books thanks to my sisters passing books down from their kids. Pjamas, a toaster and a nighttime glow worm. Oh and a kiddie laptop, Elc bath slide toy and a mega blocks transporter I got everything in the sale over the summer. I've requested that the in laws buy a bookcase and a sleeping bag for him. I am shocked that they've actually agreed! They originally wanted to get him an electric car but we've put our foot down like caused an argument!!

Kitty - I forgot your d1 took so long to conceive. That must of been really hard as it was your first. Especially as a women you think about it months/years before starting, well I did anyway. Did you have any idea what was stopping you conceive or do you just think it was time? Thanks for your xmas wish. Hope it comes true I'll be either very happy or pouring a lot of wine on Christmas Day as that is when AF is due

Oh and can I just add that my so called best friend who's seen bpear once this year and said she would prefer to see me without him the one who's asked me to be bridesmaid has text me saying that she's had a meltdown because work, short engagement and house build plans has all got too much for her. I'm just taking a moment to smile just a little

Pear, I have no idea! In fairness though I do think that in part the whole relax thing and that had some ground. I had always been convinced I had pcos as my mum had also suggested it when I was young well before child thoughts at around 17 I think I had it in my head that it would take us a long time or I wouldn't be able to ( compounded by the fact I'd never been pregnant but daft as I had always used precautions) I also dont think I was dtd enough aswell but it gets to that point you know. But the month I did I had got an app to start the ball rolling via tests etc and it was Xmas I just thought fuck it pardon the French well give it a break this month and voila. Once I had her I've not had any trouble since but maybe that's part is sparked off my fertility? Or that I obviously know I can now? It also took lib 18 months to conceive N. She didn't try next time either and it just happened like me. I did watch a program that showed that only 25% of people get pregnant in the first 3 months or something though, they showed 20 girls and broke down how many first time, 3 months etc but by 2 years they said there would only be 1 left that couldn't. How true that is not sure but I do believe things happen for a reason and sometimes it just takes longer. I have another friend like yourself who seemed to have secondary infertility. First time without trying second took years but she got there and I think you will too x

Aww pear it's good news, but it's still leaving you with questions. I agree with the general consensus that the holidays will be a nice distraction and it's always way more fun to be distracted with drinks! Yahoo! Great news on the presents! Ours are wrapped, now we just have the daunting task of getting them to the post office and sent off. I wonder what's going on with your friend? It'll be a big shock for her when the attention is off her once baby arrives on solely on baby 100% of the time!

Well, I'm now in the damaged shoulder group as well. Managed to pull and strain something in the rotator cuff area in my right shoulder so now I'm currently unable to put on a bra let alone pick up M. I wish I could say it's a really cool boxing injury, but no. I pulled it when reaching behind the driver's seat to unbuckle M's carseat so I didn't have to go out in the rain to do it. Ran to the doc's today and she said it's not torn (TG!) but now I'm out for 2-3 weeks to let it heal. I'm wallowing around in self pity whilst sitting on the couch with 3 maniac children running around due to Thanksgiving break and I have a gigantic bag of frozen peas on my shoulder. The soap opera of my life never ends.

Speaking of... Thanksgiving tomorrow. My mum is going to be there. My younger siblings are still not speaking to my mum. My dad and mum had their first mediation with the lawyers over assets splitting and my dad had to disclose on the several 10's of thousands of dollars he's been giving to his "friend" for the past several years that he never told my mum about. So who's ready for turkey tomorrow?

Omg bring!! How do 10's of thousands of pounds go missing?!?! Is this the "other" women? What did your mum say?

My dad owns his own business so he was funneling it out that way so that my mom didn't know. Yes, it's the other woman. His business partner/secretary of 20 years. He buys her whatever she needs (appliances, cars, a cabin ) and he also has FIVE investment properties with her around the US that my mom is entitled to that he was trying to keep secret so that she wouldn't be part owner to them through alimony. It's a big fucking mess.

Yesterday went fine. My siblings wouldn't stop talking about the bachelorette party that happened last weekend so I was ignored for the most part. My mom and I just hung out in the living room and she took off right after dinner. We ended up staying late after my siblings all left and just hung out with my dad. That part of the day was fun. The kids played downstairs and we were able to just watch American Football and bum around.

M is a MESS today. Snotty. Coughing. Yelling at everyone. Was up at 3:30 demanding toast. Screaming. Trying to kill our cats through means of choking, hitting with shoes, and trying to throw down the stairs. HELP! Psychotic two year old!

Hello!?

Well, M is officially dummy-free. We are on night #5 and she didn't ask about one until yesterday but was very easily distracted. Potty learning is still hit or miss. She will ask to put a nappy on one day and then run around naked the other and refuse all means of warmth and covering.

Shoulder is better. How's yours pear?

I wish I had something exciting to mention but I'm afraid it's back to being mundane around here again. Has anyone decked the halls? I keep putting it off, oops Kind of having minor flashbacks about how absolutely shitty last Christmas was so I think it's one of my roadblocks about getting excited for this year.

Well you know I decked the halls over a week ago

Posted too soon in other news kitten to the doctors a today, the constipation is too bad I can't deal with it anymore

Kitty - aww! Did the GP give any helpful advice?

Bring - no I have not done any decorating yet but hope to by the weekend! I can totally understand your feelings. Maybe start small with paper chains in the kids rooms and then ease into it [santa]

Well I have so much to say...

I went to the GP on Monday to discuss where I am now and came out feeing totally fed up because they've lost my recent blood results. I basically thought I would be waiting until Spring for a hospital fertility appt because that is what my GP told me but then out of the blue (after someone drove into the back of me at a roundabout) the hospital called me with a cancellation and I had my first appointment today with a fertility nurse this morning at the hospital. I was a mess when I arrived. Just a bag of nerves. Not helped by the fact I had to wait 45 minutes but when I finally got in all was OK. I had this fear that she would laugh at me because I've got my 2.5 year old son and I've only been trying for over a year for Dc2. Straight away her first words were "second infertility" is more common then you think. So, she says I don't have PCOS because it would have shown up on the scan. I'm a bit baffled as I'm sure I've read that it doesn't have to show up on the scan to be diagnosed with PCOS. However, if that's what she says then who am I to argue? She has arranged to take my cd1-4 bloods in January. A bit tricky as it will probably be over the Christmas period but hey ho, it is what it is. She's particularly interested to see my prolactin levels. Hallelujah, someone is finally going to check what I've been asking for over a year now!! Then she looked at DH's results and confirmed that his sperm count is good but the quality is not. She recommended all the vitamins he's already on and she said he needs to keep the laptop and his mobile away from his bits. Most importantly she thinks drinking 2 litres of water a day will make a dramatic difference. He's going to be tested again in February so he has 90 days to put it all in practice. Our next appointment with the gynae at the hospital is in February too so we will discuss the next steps. She says that iui is our next step if we see no improvement with DH and that will cost somewhere between 2-3 thousand. It's good that I have all this knowledge now. I feel a sense of relief for getting some sort of answer and I now have a plan! I'm a lady who needs a plan in order to relax DH was a bit taken back by my news at first. Especially when I told him that he has to drink 2litres of water a day to improve his swimmers! However, I feel making such minor changes to our lifestyle is positive and he should stop being so lazy. We're away next week for a few days. It's like our late summer holiday in the UK and I am so excited. So excited just to be us 3 and not have all the TTC stress and maybe a little excited that it could be in my fertile week! Oh my shoulder isn't better yet but I'm hoping the break away will fix it...hoping!!

Ah pear that's fabtastic news and really is quick! I'm the same I need a plan and it does help to relax. I found out I was pregnant at my doctors app for fertility treatment lol
I hope the same for you. I can't believe that just drinking water could make such a difference but what an easy thing to change!
I hope it wasn't to serious with your bump in the car, was baby p with you?
I wasn't at kittens app so only know second hand but it's her 2.5 yr check on tue so I will get to discuss her then aswell. She's got laxatives for now and did quite a few poos yesterday the trouble is she just holds it and holds it. It's her own mental fer that is hindering us. I've no idea what to do to make it better.

Hey kitty, magnesium citrate works wonders for kids and constipation. I love, love, love this doctor (she used to be a midwife!) and her articles are excellent. I would honestly recommend reading through THIS

Wowzers pear! What awesome luck that you got straight in, you have a sympathetic provider who knows her stuff, and you have a plan! I'm so excited for you! Hope you have a fantastic holiday!