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Original poster

November 2012 - All our babies are 18 months, where has the time gone?

999 replies

StuntNun · 02/06/2014 22:17

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/2079383-November-2012-Roll-on-summer-we-want-paddling-pools

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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PetiteRaleuse · 16/06/2014 16:59

It's a temporary Football MN gimmick.

Wandathewindfairy · 16/06/2014 17:12

But how?

Lily311 · 16/06/2014 17:20

Right. Back at home. Where do I start?

The uk trip was amazing, really really loved catching up with friends. At the same time I feel extremely sad as we had a couple of 'real family' life experience with male friends and my brother. Such as bath time, bedtime, trips out, dealing with tantrums, etc. I feel so bad for O (and for me) for not having those moments on a daily basis and it's just so much easier when you have someone there to share these things. I loved the constant talking in the evenings and I drunk too much wine. Oh well.

Most of my friends are struggling in their relationships which affected me a bit, I want everyone to be happy. There was one friend who clearly just doesn't know what she wants and I might have just told her to go home and appreciate of what she has Blush.

O was a superstar, only she didn't want to fall asleep by herself. But that's fine, we spent the nights at 4 different places so no wonder really.

And now confession time. I had sex. Yes. Me. After more than 2 years. It just happened with my male best friend. Everything was wrong about it but at the same time everything was just right about it. I couldn't switch off the first time it happened, we were in my old flat, he was Leo's friend, one of my best friend's ex, Olivia sleeping in the other room, etc. It happened last Sunday morning, we slept in one bed as I was cold and O slept on my duvet, didn't want to move her. He took it as a sign although we slept in one bed several times before. That day I went to stay with the friend whose ex he is, felt really awkward and obviously she guessed it straight away. She was awesome about it, told me not to worry about her and that she didn't mind at all. We stayed there all week, than spent a night with my brother and went back to his on Saturday night. Cue both of us knowing it would happen again and it did. Was much better I have to say but I'm not sure what to think now. I don't fancy him, he really is one of my best friends, he came with me for the funeral and was there at the hospital when Olivia was born. He is very special. No spark though, I don't want a relationship with him and I have no idea what he wants. I don't feel any differently about him but if I would have the chance to sleep with him again, probably i would. Just because I didn't have sex for so long. chasing said that it was good it happened with him as he is a friend and I think she is right. I definitely have no regrets. Anyone has any sensible thoughts? And how was the first sex after birth? It felt different to me, not worst, not better but different. And is it normal that I couldn't switch off properly? I mean second time round I was much better but still thought about Olivia sometimes Blush. I can't believe I'm asking these, I would have never thought I would have sex on this trip and that it would be him.

PetiteRaleuse · 16/06/2014 17:26

What a rollercoaster for you lily but I'd agree with chasing best to get back in the saddle with a friend, in a safe place.

wanda it's an option on your profile page.

PetiteRaleuse · 16/06/2014 17:27

I think it is normal that you couldn't switch off properly lily . Don't worry about that.

ValiumQueen · 16/06/2014 18:05

Wow Lily Smile what an eventful trip. I think like others have said, that it was a good thing to have happened, and with a good person Smile

fruitpastilles · 16/06/2014 20:59

Certainly a lot going on lily but yes, I'm also thinking that it's good that it happened with him and not someone random, it's bound to have been very emotional for you.

Zamboni · 16/06/2014 21:37

Lily I'm really pleased for you. I think this was the best and safest way ( for your heart) to get back in the saddle. Someone who knows the background and who cares about you but not a situation where you are at risk of heartbreak. I imagine you may have overwhelming and conflicting feelings and that's perfectly ok if you do. It's also ok not to really feel anything about it too. FWIW I think it was a very brave thing to do. Mind wandering post DC v normal too. Hope you find a way to reconcile friendship with the sex and so no one has unmet expectations - but if you are friends who can shag from time to time and keep the friendship then why not? Thanks

BP that's terrifying, I would definitely report if you can.

Busy day, S still has no pox but DD has been very brave and good.

Donnadoon · 16/06/2014 23:22

lily I'm not as articulate as some on here so apologies if this comes out wrong....but good for you girl ! You are a red blooded female in your own right. Sex is an essential ordinairy bodily function Grin and I'm also glad he was your friend. My advice would be not to over analyze anything and enjoy Wine

diggerdigsdogs · 16/06/2014 23:33

Were in hospital. Ds not responding to meds. They may send us to Sydney Childrens. :(

itsnotyouitsMeals · 17/06/2014 00:23

Oh no digger. Holding your hand. Thinking of you and DS. Hope all will be ok. Hugs.

Lily311 · 17/06/2014 04:36

Oh no digger, holding your hands

diggerdigsdogs · 17/06/2014 05:43

At Sydney childrens on high flow o2. Ds is sedated and full of tubes and wires. Poor darling.

He's ok, he is. It's just horrible to see. Bloody asthma.

fruitpastilles · 17/06/2014 06:21

Big hugs digger hope he's ok x

PetiteRaleuse · 17/06/2014 06:32

Massive hugs digger this asthma is causing you all so much stress I hope you see some improvement in the next few hours Flowers

Kyz · 17/06/2014 06:36

Morning. Not caught up yet but have read what's on this page and sending well wishes digger hope he's ok and shows improvement soon

lily I think this is a good thing and I can't see anything wrong with how it's made you feel

ValiumQueen · 17/06/2014 06:37

Oh Digger big big hugs.

Pikz · 17/06/2014 07:17

Digger huge huge hugs

Lily I think it's a good thing. Sounds safe and unawkward which is important.

GTbaby · 17/06/2014 07:48

Hugs digger x

Zamboni · 17/06/2014 08:07

Thinking of you digger xx

Wandathewindfairy · 17/06/2014 08:34

digger thinking of you! sounds nightmarish! please keep is updated. ThanksXx

lily everyone else has articulated it beautifully. I agree with them all and particularly not to over analyse it. Enjoy it for what it was, value your friendship and continue making the most of every day with O.

Where can I get loom bands from?

Today is the day that I use my birthday vouchers at the spa hotel. never minding the fact I have these visitors coming next week and have stacks to do, pah

I am also going to the chiropodist to get my feet summer ready, which I am really looking forward to.

I am v conscious I am not here much, I am thinking of you all though. The weather has been fab the last few days and after my weeks holiday I feel like I have a new stash of energy.

Great morning faffing at the beach yesterday with the SIL and Dn

DN and DS1 in the car:

DS "you poo poo pee pee plant"
Hahahahahahaha
DN " nooo you poo poo pee plant toilet"
Hahahahahahaha
DS " you poo poo pee plant garage"
Hahahahahahahahshz
DN "you pee pee poo poo plant pants"

Hahahahahahahahaha

I thought it was hilarious. They were aware they were being stupid. Toilet humour has most definitely arrived.

Anyway, on a more serious note, then we did find the eggs. £1.50 for 2 1/2 doz medium eggs, I think £2.50 for large eggs.

Last night I went out to hose down the veg patch, which is a massive project in itself, hose to field etc, but I just felt so at peace with everything, the world and my life. Pottering round the field in the evening sun watching the mountains and the sea, hosing the produce, that is it for me.

Today, contented.

Wandathewindfairy · 17/06/2014 08:34

Obviously that is my status as @ 08:34 we know how things can change!!!!

PetiteRaleuse · 17/06/2014 08:49

Wonderful to see such a happy post wanda :)

PetiteRaleuse · 17/06/2014 10:52

So yesterday I went to pick up the girls from nursery. LO had a huge bump on her head so I of course asked what had happened. Apparently she tripped over her trousers which she had pulled down to go to the loo!

She went on the loo a couple of times yesterday apparently as when she asked to go nursery allowed her. Was a little bit annoyed at them starting her training as I wanted to do it myself during the holidays, but anyway.

Last night before PJs she asks to go on the potty. So I let her, and she used it! Her nappy was wet though so she is still using her nappies too.

Mentioned our "success" to nursery this morning and we discussed my original plans to train her in July and they promised they wouldn't take the lead in the meantime and would just follow her lead until then. I won't be encouraging anything either until then, as I am quite sure that I want to be at home for the duration of the training and we will be away for a week before the two weeks at home, so don't want to confuse her.

She was massively proud of herself though (as was I obviously). Just got to curb her enthusiasm another month and hope she doesn't decide not to bother anymore when that time comes.

ValiumQueen · 17/06/2014 10:54

Loom bands are everywhere here. Today I am sporting a multi-coloured lanyard and have several orders Grin The Works sell them, but I don't rate the quality. I would go for Amazon but check the reviews. You can get sweetie ones that smell of sweets Smile