Dec 08 - three is the new two.

[Vagolajahooli]

Well it seems appropriate you cheeky breeders.

[poisondwarf]

Hope it all goes smoothly Beans. Looking forward to meeting the new thread baby. My prediction is a girl born 7.30pm today.

Happy Birthday sybs!

[beans37]

PS will text Sybs any news and she'll keep you updated! Is that ok, Sybs? X

[DeidreBarlow]

Oh beans good luck will be thinking of you!! X

[Indith]

Good luck Beans!

How much do you lot talk?! One long shift yesterday and about half a million posts! At home today but need to study so catching up be my reward later.

[Rubena]

Good luck beans. Sybs I will be standing by

Aaaaargh!!! shit buggerey cocked up night last night. Ive decided it isn't worth having conversations with dh to sort logistical day to day stuff, as he's just not capable. Covered the new nursery / school drop offs / pick ups / hours dd would need, to death, SEVERAL times over the last few weeks, then he casually drops in last night, that it's probably an 8am start not 9 at the new job, which TOTALLY changes & buggers up everything. Bloody men, or rather just dh. Oh and it just didn't "cross his mind" until now, despite the fact that I've done the conversation regarding it all to DEATH!!! Fuming

[Indith]

Rubes you have my sympathy! Dh is the same. I think that part of the brain must have been one of those additions God realised he'd missed out of his test model when he went on to perfect humankind with Eve .

I am going to go study now I promise. Have dumped dcs, had breakfast. It is colder than I thought so need bed socks, a jumper and to bring my books down so I can work in front of the fire.

[JumpJockey]

Good luck Beans, hope all goes smoothly and you've got your lovely baby by day's end.

Happy birthday Sybs!

Delighted to say that S went into the classroom without clinging to me today - went in with one of her nursery friends so she had a pal, and didn't look back. Not quite skipping in, but it's a great step forward Also school dinner involved rice crispie chocolate brownies for pudding and today is roast chicken, so she's doing pretty well there too!

[JumpJockey]

NB Rubes what an absolute pain in the neck. They do have these moments when you think "You're so clever, how can you do such daft things?". The other weekend when I was at work E fell asleep in her car seat and had a wee accident, so DH got her out, took off clothes, put only the wet part of her seat cover in the washing machine and set it going. Leaving the weed-upon clothes in the bath.

[JamInMyWellies]

Hurrah Beans maybe they will check you out and let you home to birth, fingers crossed.

Rubes oh I hear you on the not listening thing. Dh vvv similar. Yesterday afternoon. Him to me so I am out tonight erm no you are not the one night of the wk I have something on every wk without fail and you forget to tell me I need a sitter and you are out. To be fair he did then win a magnum of champagne while out but even so.

[Vagolajahooli]

Don't get me started, I really don't know how these guys hold such intense jobs. No wonder PA's and secretaries were invented, they are the office replacement to a wife/partner. Our secretary in my old community nursing office had 8 of us to organise and do bits & bobs for. She had so much extra time she used to help the doctors secretaries who had one boy doctor each and were run off their feet. Funnily enough the female neonatoligists secretary was a lot less stressed.

[Rubena]

JJ I constantly say that. Last night I was screeching that I don't know how he's got this far in life! The thing is, we talked about all the ins and outs and details of breakfast club early drop off for DS, and the time etc on the rare days I'm away, and he said how he "wouldn't be able to ride those days" but yes it would be "plenty of time to get to the new job on the train" etc bloody etc. And the full days for dd that he finally convinced me would mean peace of mind as I'd never have to feel like I need to 100% rely on mil every time I work - complete waste of bloody time and money now, because if dh can't ever drop ds off early and get to work on time, then no point having dd sorted as I may as well have an extra £350 a month in my pocket, and put it towards all the bloody therapy I will need when mil has to pretty much move in every time I have a trip. Urgh, it was meant to get easier. "Didn't cross his mind" It's not meant to just "cross your bloody mind" You're meant to actively think of all these things ie START TIME at work (pretty important factor in all this) when you have a conversation to work things out!!!!!

I'm not sure I'm going to continue with work. Lets face it, I spend most of the time getting out of going away anyway.
DH said the only time we've ever not had stress surrounding all this, is when I was on maternity leave, or before we had kids. Not sure it's worth it anymore.

[Still fuming]

[Rubena]

I have said that to him Vag, and he says "at work I have to write everything down" he said "That's why I always want to do spreadsheets at home for things, but you always give me a hard time about wasting time doing that" (that's because he spends more time doing a spreadsheet and planning what needs to be done, than actually doing what's needed in the time frame necessary!)

Great news on DD at school JJ!

[JamInMyWellies]

on your behalf Rubes.

We have calendars spread across all ipads laptops and phones and everyone is colour coded but yet he still cant put a bloody date in it or check it.

[Vagolajahooli]

Oh Rubes we really need a wine together one day. I have tried to explain I have a mental list of approximately 10 things in order of what needs doing first and shuffle it around as things come up or needs change. I honed it at work esp when working on the wards. You would do a similar type of thing in your work. It's called time management, but these days instead of on a shift basis mine is more like a weekly basis. It gets things done. Whereas DH will every week talk about things has been meaning to do professional and personally that still have not got done.The amount of times I've said "stop talking about it, just do it".

[Vagolajahooli]

Jam I have to email DH any evening plans then he can send it to his outlook calender!

[ShadyLadyT]

Looks like you are not alone, Rubes. I am with you all on this male 'selective deafness' thing. I have to say something to DP several times and he will often claim it's the first he's heard of it. Or, even worse, he won't respond at all to something, not even change his facial expression, so I mention it again a day or two later. And then he calls me a nag! Grrr.

Glad for you about DD1, JJ. Our littles all seem to be settling rather well

I have only popped on here to say Happy Birthday dear Sybs (and yes, you are right, we DO need to sort out a meeting for those of us down 'ere...September has run away with us) and BEANS, if you do have an induction my SIL has had two (she may have had three) and she always swears they're ok, so take heart. I have obviously bombed out with the time of birth but I am still sticking to a 7lb2 boy!

Rubes, I couldn't quite follow the ins and outs of the morning arrangements but I will say that at least there's only another nine months of it (effectively) and it will all be simplified with DD at school. Hope you can jiggle it somehow meantime.

Right, must crack on - a rare child free morning!

[ShadyLadyT]

Rubes, I know I am quite a way away but you know I would always have DD if you were working and DH could somehow get DS to school. Really mean it.

[Rubena]

Thanks Lady, and thanks all of you - glad I'm not suffering alone!! Thanks Lady, but dd isn't the problem. She's paid for to be in 0730-1830!! Mon and Tues Never actually is there that long though, but if I'm ever away (granted only twice a month - these days more like once ) but DS was going to go to Breakfast club those days which starts at 0745 and dh could drop dd at 0730 then DS at 0745, and be at work by 9.... but oh, he forgot, the new job would most likely start at 8, so clearly can't get into the London job in 15 mins, even on the fast train! So now, it would mean if I'm away, say, Mon-Wed, mil would need to come over Sun night (which means Sunday morning) then stay until at least collection of ds from school on the Wed (I could book ds in the after school club, but she'd beg me not to and want to stay and collect him. Now I know I should be grateful, but there are a couple of factors here. One is, she's not necessarily going to be available EVERY trip I have as she has a pretty busy diary apparently, filled with trips away (Sicily tomorrow) and then haircuts, embroidery class, Yoga and visits to museums etc, so tends to tell me when she can and cant be around, and secondly, although she's great with the kids, she tends to take over the things that I really want to do as "firsts" with MY kids - she had her time, and she had it with THREE. I think she sometimes steps over the grandma boundary and into the parents place to do things. They aren't her kids, they are her grankids!

Jam / Vag oh yes we've been down that synchronizing all electronic devices / Google calendar route, and same thing. DH would FORGET to update it, so it became harder. I then got a calendar and wrote everything in bold, but same thing, he forgets to keep it updated - actually it's worse, becasue mil can then come over and browse it, then say "oooh I see you're off to Dubai on Saturday, you'll need me to come over then won't you"? I'll faf around and say I'm not sure I'm flying it yet, and she'll still have it written in her diary, then if convenient for her (ie no embroidery class or quiz) she'll wait until I've potentially left the country, then just TELL dh she's coming over, and does everything for him and the kids, which is nice, but I think it's important that HE do things for the kids himself.

Sorry I'm really ranting. I've just never gotten over a few incidents which have scarred me re mil!

[ShadyLadyT]

Ah, I now see the problem. Ah. Oh dear Well...all I can say is that you may only have to have MIL once a month. That's just about teeth grittable I reckon. Alternatively is there anyone locally with a similar routine who could help you out??

[Vagolajahooli]

Oh I'm so mad. There is a school holiday here because it's the day the king reads the budget. So the boys are both home and ds2 has a friend over. The three of them snuck into the spare room and opened one of the star wars lego things I'd gotten on sale to use as birthday presents and opened it. I think they thought if they opened it and made it I would have no choice but to let them have it. Well they were sorely mistaken I've taken it off them gone mad at them and promised to give it away. Cross mummy alert. I've called them thieves and ungrateful for the gazillion toys they already have.

[JumpJockey]

Can I rant briefly about a diary clash? In November DH and I are going away for the weekend only as far as Suffolk, but it's our first ever weekend without girls, the ILs are coming down to look after them. It's a singing weekend with some good friends in a posh country house, and the Sat afternoon is set aside for free time to do touristy stuff, go for walks etc. He's just realised that he's managed to book 3 very hard-to-pin-down people for a 3 hour meeting during this free afternoon. Ths meeting cannot be changed as one of the people is coming across the country for it. Apparently even though the weekend has been marked on the calendar since June he didn't put it in his diary and so will be absent for several hours of our FIRST EVER CHILD FREE WEEKEND. I will instead be taking a good book to the pub and nursing many pints of ale, and grinding my teeth a bit.

Rubes you have my greatest sympathy, all rather confusing so easy to see how you need to be uber organised.

[ShadyLadyT]

Oh JJ

[Mckayz]

Beans, hope all is going well!!

Happy Birthday Sybs.

[Arrtttiiieee]

By gosh it is an unhappy morning on the thread. I am lucky that DH is reasonably good at remembering things and I am rather disorganised myself so not in a position to criticise. I rather rely on him actually! He finds other ways to annoy me though, primarily by being messy and apparently blind to mess so never bothered by it.

JJ, brilliant news that S went to school happily. DD2 did not cry today or yesterday so we have also had a breakthrough. I think she is trying to impress the new au pair!

[beans37]

Hello everyone. So, am back at home. Been in and it's not my waters, its rancid watery discharge. But I am contracting a bit, so may well not need to be induced. I've had a sweep, which was grim. Bt I've got Group B Streptococcus in my fanjo, so I can't have a home birth, as need to be on antibiotics throughout labour so that the baby isn't infected. I am considered high risk! How extraordinary.

Anyway, life goes on, just about to have a pizza and hope things get moving. Am 2cm dilated, so guess things are moving a weenie bit. The midwife reckoned tomorrow latest, but I have to go in when my contractions start, can't labour at home because of the risk of infection. D you know about it, Indith?

Rubes, sorry you're having such a shocker. How irritating! And JJ. I feel your pain!