July 2010 - Next thread, cba to think of a title

[Chulita]

I want to witter away to you lot and none of you have come up with the goods so this will have to do...

Our third drawer down in the kitchen drawers is the messy one. There's a comedian who has done a song/comedy routine about this -

We go to a playgroup that runs twice a week, mainly cos I know quite a lot of the others there quite well now (we do a pub quiz together every couple of weeks and have the odd night out drinking). I didn't go much last term as it was winter and G kept getting colds etc. New term started again this week so we'll probably be going more. All the groups here seem to run in the morning e.g playgroup is 9.30-11.30

Stac is it an email questionnaire? DO you have to live in the UK to complete it? I'll do one if I qualify.

I listed my grandad's old car on ebay and someone's just bought it straight off, without having a look at it first, without putting an offer in and then emailed saying. "this is my mobile number ..........". Odd or what? I'd be over the moon if she's serious but I can't help thinking, wtf? I suppose I'll have to ring and see what the game is.

Grrr don't talk to me about ebay chul, that woman has come back and said she can't get the hoods sorted. She either wants me to sort it or she wants a refund, I have offered her a refund. My only worry is that now the shop I bought it from know that I sold it (she will have had my details from paypal so will no doubt have given my name), they may invalidate my warrenty. So even if I buy it back from her, will I be able to get it sorted? Aaaahhhh

Well D was a surprise (or not?) at the party. Within 10 mins he managed to slide over and land hard on his bum which he cried for ages about. He then spent the next hour or so trying to get me to pick him up, whinging and when he wasn't doing that he was trying to run off into the men's toilets. The only time he was happy and playing was 10 mins to the end when most people had gone. He doesnt like noisy, crowded places it appears.

DH thinks it'll be fine, they've got to prove I sold it and bought it back, which they can't. So I've just offered a refund and then hopefully I'll get it sorted and then just sell it again. At least that's the plan.

Grr...DH phoned her and she's not even passed her test yet, asked if we could drive it an hour away for her. It's not insured so unless we get proof of insurance we can't, and I'd really rather not take both cars, both children and drive it down (I can drive 3rd party on someone else's insurance) and then come back in our car. Thing is it cost £8 to list, she didn't ask anything, just 'bought' the blooming thing but cos we asked for cash on collection there's nothing stopping her pulling out and then we'd have to relist it. We had several watchers on it too so no guarantee we'd sell it after that. She's got no ebay rating so won't care if we give her negative...I'm so irritated and I really want to be shot of this car, AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!

mlic that's so stupid of the woman, did you mention in the listing about the hoods? What a pita.

dh poor D! has he gone down alright tonight?

Nightmare chulita! Two reasons in one night why I'll never sell on ebay again [again]

I had a problem with my old hoods. The shop I bought it through got them exchanged for me. I didn't put them on the buggy as I wanted them to be 'brand new in packaging' as a selling point (which I'm kicking myself for now!) They contacted me and said the zips on the new hoods don't connect to the seat unit - the zip is on backwards iyswim. And that's where we are.

I feel sick about it all. DH is telling me to chill and not worry but I get worked up about stuff like this, I can't help it it's my nature. I feel ill.

Can I give you another reason? I sold some toys the dc don't play with and seriously underestimated the postage so for 3 nearly brand new toys costing a total of around £40 new I made 53p :( What a freaking joke.

This car thing is so going to piss me right off if she backs out of it, must stop thinking about it or I'm going to explode!

On the plus side I made little garlic dough balls to go with our pasta pesto and they were delicious! Definitely one to do again!

Oh I'm so with you - it's just not worth the hassle is it

I'm refreshing my inbox every 3 minutes to see if she's answered me trying not to think about it. DH has poured me a glass of wine and demanded I don't think about it.

Fucking ebay.

I'm off to check on my beautiful sleeping babies to make me feel better :)

Chul- it took about half an hour but he didnt cry so that's something. He hasn't woken up yet

Mlisc- argh eBay can be annoying like that can't it. Hope you get a good outcome.

mylife i would, in all seriousness, be really interested in your icandy, dont know what we would do about the hood or how to get it down here though, might be more hassle than its worth from your point of view but i love my icandy and would love to have a double. Have u got pics of it being used as a double?
cake please dont stress about how ur coming across to us on here re F, we all know each other well enough by now to know what u mean.
chu how u feeling atm, still sick?
stac D is fine now thanks, he is still waking anytime after 4 though and again last night was soaking wet, and that was Tesco superdry, im going in in a min to change his nappy!!!!hope its not a mistake!!
dh u must be knackered u poor thing, u are doing the right thing im my opinion for u and for him.
trudy i had to laugh about the use of the umberella, that must look really quite funny, sorry, im sure i'll be at that stage soon! This baby moves so much its really quite alarming at times, i feel like my whole body moves, its really weird.
Re groups, the cm takes him to something every day so i dont need to but when hes home with me and new boy i will start taking them somewhere, whilst i found it a bind some days i did meet some nice people and i get very board of my own company too so need to get out.
Right, off to change a nappy, fingers crossed it doesnt back fire!!!!!!!!!!!!
Night everyone xx

I'll defo let you know what happens with this woman vik :) Still no answer from her yet, which I'm surprised about tbh.

When ds2 was teeny I found Sure Start groups a godsend. There was always someone to help with one of the boys when the other needed me for something.

I can e-mail the ladies interested the questionnaire if you pm me your e_mail addys. Thanks all :)

I am sat downstairs while everyone else in my house is fast asleep. Soooo not fair :(

That's poo mlisc, hope you're back asleep now. A is watching Scooby Doo and G is emptying old potting mix all over the deck.

No I wasn't wss :( The last time I looked at the time it was 4:15am. I went back to bed just before you posted and probably got to sleep around 4:30. Then W was restless at 5:30 and another time when I didn't look at the clock and then E was stood outside his bedroom at 6:50 saying 'mammy I need to be quiet'

I blame ebay!

mlisc you sound just like my DH, if something's on his mind he just can't sleep and ends up going downstairs and stressing all night.

viksam I'm alright thanks, have been clear since Friday so it's looking good Have you tried using the next size up nappy? They sometimes hold a bit more and overnight it shouldn't matter too much about a perfect fit since he won't be running about (hopefully)

stac I've pm'ed you

Yep, that's me! DH said he was awake at 5am and I was still awake when he woke up so even less sleep than I thought!

Yes, what size is he in vik? How did he get on last night?

shit night here again - more bloody teeth coming i think she's just going to get them all at once by the looks of things.

she was up for 2 hours in the middle of the night again - nothing would help.

mlic you'll be able to exchange that hood no sweat as tis a manufacturing fault. icandy don't benefit at all by not helping you sort this. could you offer to exchange the hoods on behalf of the buyer and so she keeps the pram iyswim and then you just give her the new hood when you have it?

thank you vik and chul, i was feeling like i was coming across badly and doing everyone's heads in with the thing about F.

there's been a bit of a resolution at nursery too now as when i called them yday to check on how F & A were doing, we got on the subject of the 'preschool room' and agreed that F will start doing some hours in there soon as he'll enjoy it and it'll hopefully keep him occupied and less loonish. i handled the conversation v differently to how i might have without the advice and views on here so thanks again everyone.

chul that's so annoying about the toys i'll still use ebay for some things but wonder if a carboot sale is an easier/cheaper option for others

stuff i want to know about please...

anyone planning to give up bf soon? i'm not actually desperate to stop immediately but just starting to think about but just can't see how whilst she's teething non bloody stop and bf is one of the only things which calms her down.

what hours do you work? i'm still doing 20 hours across 2 full days and then the rest flexibly across the week (the downside is that i'm always 'on' and it doesn't really feel as tho i have enough time but the upside is that it's only 2 days of the DCs being in nursery)

my boss wants me to do more hours. i'm adamant that i won't do F/T but am wondering about doing 2.5 days which i think might make things a lot easier in terms of being able to offer a 3rd day when people want to set up meetings or conf calls. F will be going in 2.5 days in jan anyway so it's just A i'm undecided about - i feel sad that she's still a 'baby' and she'll be away from me more than F was at the same age.

D had a slightly better night, first wake up at 10 and I was expecting him to wake up within the hour like he usually does but he slept til midnight. Then awake at 3 something then half 5.

It might just be a coincidence or his age but he's alot happier amusing himself, playing with his cars and just generally pottering around.

But she's not a baby though cake, she's a little toddler who is developing her character and building friendships - all of which nursery is excellent for. And she won't hold it against you that she will go to nursery half a day a week more than F did! I used to work 3 days and it was the perfect compromise imo - at work often enough to be able to get things done/attend meetings but home enough with E too.

I wish I had a job. The ebay thing was what started me worrying last night but then I got carried away thinking about how I'm skint, I'm not paying any NI (unless it is being paid because I get child benefit, which I doubt), I have no pension anymore...I have zero income and I hate it. In an ideal world I would have my own business. and therefore have no-one to answer to if the kids were ill and I needed to pick them up from nursery/school etc. But self esteem issues mean I genuinely don't believe I'm good enough at anything to do it.

Sorry to waffle on about it again. I just feel like a bit of a let down to society (and myself/my family) atm. I have a degree and a Masters, yet I'm sat at home relying on my husband for finances and it just doesn't feel right. But I don't know what to do about it :(

mlic I'm sorry you feel that way. Please try and not do that. You are not a burden to society. Shame on society for making you feel like that, shame on society for leaving you skint and relying on your husband. You are doing one of the most important jobs. You are raising children for the future. Sadly, this isn't paid well and leaves parents feel like that all over the western world.

However, probably a bit heavy to start you off with changing the Western world [hsmile]. I think it is important that you start looking at your self esteem now. Don't push it to the back and find yourself in ten years completely riddled with insecurities. You are a strong, well educated woman, who can achieve whatever she sets her heart to. It might not be smooth running from the beginning, but you can work on that.

Think of things that interest you.
Things you can do maybe without too many start up costs.
Are there any courses for people starting their own business?
Could you use your Fridays to educate yourself further in a field that might benefit you in future?
Could you use your excellent cooking skills for something?
Could you develop your handicraft a bit more?
Might an advisor get you thinking along new lines?

Just a bit of food for thought.

Hope I'm not overstepping some line here. Just didn't want you to feel like a failure, when you're clearly not.

Will post more about other stuff later.

Thanks trudy :) I do run through all those things in my head - I never come out with any answers though!

I've just been looking at the local college vacancies and there's one that interests me and it's only 16 hours a week. I want to apply for that but don't have word on my notebook so will have to wait until I either use dh's mac or get an application form in ye olde way

I just need to get out of this rut I'm stuck in!

Morning all! Glad to see there were better nights for some of the LOs. :) We've been having a few problems here lately with overnight sleeping, but I'm pretty sure that's just down to the fact M has a bit of a cold. (And seems to have given it to me, boo!)

MLISC, are you still enjoying sewing? How about you set up an Ebay shop offering things like personalised bunting? :) I'd buy something like that for M's room... Especially if I could request a jungle theme or a colour scheme of green/blue/yellow to match the rest of her things.

Then if it takes off, you could always expand your repertoir to other things. For example at this time of year you could offer personalised Santa Sacks/Stockings? I was thinking about getting one for M from somewhere. I made a stocking last year for her, but I think it's going to be too small for the Brio box this year.

I work F/T, Cake. 7.5 hours a day, Monday to Friday, same as DH. [dead] Life is a bit manic, to be honest. Weekends pass in a haze of chores, while we try and fit in as much quality time with M as we possibly can. Next salary increase (Ha!), I'm sorely tempted to appeal to the accountant (DH) to let me get a cleaner!

Funny that nappy sizes were mentioned... I was wondering about that the other day! M is currently in Pampers size 4, but I was wondering whether to take her to 4+ as the current size seems to be getting a bit narrow for her. Is there much of a jump? She seems to be on the low end of the weight requirements.

Having said Pampers were fine, when I woke J at 8.45 so we wouldn't be late for swimming J woke up this morning he had soaked through his nappy, vest, sleepsuit AND sleeping bag! So much wee! I may have to join you guys in going up to 4+ or 5 for overnight.

Sorry you feel like that MLISC. They say 'A mother's place is in the wrong' - if you were working you'd have people telling you you should be at home with your kids. There are no right answers, you have to do what works for you and your family. Go for the 16 hour a week job, that sounds fab!

Spirael, if I were you I would definitely get a cleaner - I think you need one if you both work FT.

Cake, I work 21 hours a week (3 days) but spread over 4 - I do one full day in the office and 3 5-hour days from home. It's working well for me, it feels like the right balance. Though in some ways I wish I worked three full days and had four clear days off.

I am still happily BFing and have no particular plans to stop soon. Now we're at a point where he will go to bed without a BF if necessary it's much more freeing. I guess the only thing I can't do is leave him overnight altogether, but I don't have any particular desire to do that. I think it would be nice if DH and I could go away for a weekend before I get PG with no 2, so maybe we'll aim for that sometime next summer.