In the vein of "Chester draws"

[ShatnersWoodwind]

On a local selling page:

"Chabby Chique bedside tables".

😂

😂

Walla

"I got all on Tinder hooks"

My friend emailed me today to want me to make sure that the builder I am about to employ is 'bonified'.

its the house with the bullion window and tall chimberleys

Whinnee the poo drawins
Sweed boots
And my personal favourite from someone offering man with a van services: If I can be of a sistance please massage me.
I will not be taking him up on that offer.

My parents never got over an ad in the back of the local paper for a 'Three piece shite, VGC'.

A flat advertised on a local town's Facebook
2 bedrooms both ' on sweep'.

Right from the gecko rather than right from the get go

Someone asked for advice because they weren't 'ofay' with my line of work!

Walla always gets me but my absolute favourite was ‘Belgian whistles’ rather than ‘bells and whistles’

DH and I are watching Rip Off Britain right now (recorded earlier today,) and one particular holiday company has confusing information in the terms and conditions.

DH turned around to me and said 'hmm they do like to boozbamble people.'

Straight face. Never even realised he had said it! 😆

.

BELGIAN WHISTLES!!! 😆

What is WALLA?

Yes what is walla ?

Voila!

Thanks Bores!

There was one on another thread recently - probably an autocorrect - a reference to something being “off the beat and track”. It almost makes sense if you think of a police officer’s beat…

Stirling neckliss.

I got two pieces of furniture re-upholstered and the docket mentioned ‘1 x chez long’

I made a note of three which have tickled me lately;

"Smiling like a treasure cat"
"Bone of contentment"
"Trimming my pivot hedge"

Ball balls instead of baubles.
Dinning table.
Parents at a school I taught at . Question was 'What religion are you?'
Parent filled in 'CV' instead of C of E .

I’m not phased by it.

Off my own back.

All the glitters is not gold!

“It has don don me” is one I saw recently in a comment section of an Instagram post.

It took me a little while to work out the poster meant “it has dawned on me”