OH caught drug driving no idea what to do

[AW525]

We have a 6 month old baby, been together over 4 years, he has today been caught drug driving (first time ever). We are currently living with family members as we are renovating and are due to move in in 2 weeks time - our first family home. Turns out he bought some Cocaine last night, did some at the pub, then drove to where we are living, he didn't tell me any of this at the time. Then this morning went back to the Reno house and did more. Upon driving home he's been pulled over due to poor lights and been tested. He doesn't have a problem generally but he gets sucked in to this due to his friends. As far as I'm aware this is the first time he's done it since baby arrived as we had an argument about his infrequent use when I was pregnant. I'm hurt he did this, I'm hurt he tried hiding it, I'm hurt for my baby, I'm hurt for my family. I want him to leave and stay somewhere else but I'm on maternity leave we are due to move in I just feel so overwhelmed. I'm not sure my reason for this post, I just feel so gutted. X

He's a coke head.

He's doing coke on a Saturday morning??

Doing coke alone on a Saturday morning at that. He absolutely has a problem.

He is an addict. He won’t be able to stop on his own.

Social Workers will be around soon, maybe best to get rid of the drug addict before they turn up.

Yah huh, the first time he's done it he got busted
What are the odds.

You have some very difficult decisions to make.

Whose family are you living with? As in do you have support from your family?

He is an addict, loser.

Sorry OP I doubt his coke use is as infrequent as you think it is - he at the least has a habit, at worst an addiction. You and he need a real discussion on how you move forward. To be honest you’ll be watching him like a hawk, so he needs to stop and prove himself trustworthy. Time will tell.

I'm sorry but he doesn't get sucked in by friends, that's bullshit. I've been offered cocaine numerous times and can quite easily say no, because I don't use cocaine. His friends weren't there when he was doing it this morning renovating the house were they? He dry sniffed on his own in the morning and he done it and drove. I think you have more to be found out.

You need to stop minimising. Anyone doing coke alone at breakfast time has a problem, a big one.

My sympathy and empathy. He's much an addict as the next alcoholic.

Hopefully someone with more experience will along to guide you to useful help m.

Also I would absolutely NOT trust him to drive your child.

This is not a one off or a rarity for him and if you think it is then you are deluding yourself . Does he need to drive as he will be disqualified + a fine + possible community order

It sounds like you’re minimising what he’s done and excusing him. I think you need to recognise the full extent of what he has done. If it is your family members you’re living with id be asking him to leave right now. If not I’d probably leave yourself and stay with family if that’s possible. I personally could not forgive this and as others have said it’s an addiction.

You have no idea how much he does it OP because he doesn't tell you. You only found out about this binge because the police are now involved. The relationship needs to end here, are you living with your family?

How long does coke stay in the system if he got caught 24 hours later.

id be massively concerned and he deserves the police intervention he is now going to received is deserved

Coke on a Friday night, drives, then coke on a Saturday morning alone and then drives?! He's getting high several times a week, minimum. He's casual with his life, other people's on the road, and yours. Ditch him.

He got caught a couple of hours later. He got high again that morning.

How will you react when social services arrive to question the safety of your child? Drugs and babies do not mix. You can never leave your child with him, never leave them alone together, never trust him to drive you or your little one.

Does he need his licence? Will he lose his job? What an idiot.

He's an addict who chose to have cocaine for breakfast and drive under the influence. That means he's a risk to your child. Which means he has to go, asap.

Very sorry for you but get real about this now. The relationship cannot continue.

Legal advice over the house first thing Monday. Do you move in (just you and baby? Does he move in and you and baby remain with family. Do you put it on the market?

Don't tell him you are getting advice.

we had an argument about his infrequent use when I was pregnant

You walked in with your eyes wide open love!

He will be disqualified from driving for at least one year. That might be enough of a wake up call to prompt him to change his behaviour. Do not start offering to be his chauffeur, he needs to deal with the consequences himself.

That’s harsh