WORST sex dream EVER! I will NEVER sleep again!

[MumBod]

Donald Trump!

What the fuck, mind?

Why?

Can I get a brain transplant for this on the NHS?

Fucking hell...he kissed the back of my neck and groped my boobs and...

Oh god

SheWhoDaresGins

I just spat my tea all over the keyboard....

OP, I once dreamed of Boris....

I've had Keith Chegwin and my late FIL.

SheWhoDaresWins

MissHooliesCardigan at the same time?

That would be a ménage-a-nah, wouldn't it? Suffering Christ.

Why do our minds do this to us?

He's getting ready for tonight op. See you later....

Gins not Wins, sorry.

On second thoughts, no I'm not.

All dream sex means for me is that my period is about to start.

Handy, since they're so random.

Oh ffs.

This is like some kind of hazing.

Donald Trump should not ever be in the same room as a bed. The two should be kept separate to avoid unpleasant consequences. Like bleach and vinegar.

Yeah, I'm ovulating.

So my body is feeling all fertile, and who does its thoughts turn to as a babydaddy?

Donald Fucking Trump. I must have laid a rogue egg. I'm imagining it like a little orange tictac with an evil grin.

Little orange tic tac

I must have laid a rogue egg. I'm imagining it like a little orange tictac with an evil grin

I am howling....

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYyyyyyyyy did I open this thread [cry]

Oh my fucking god he's taken control of my ovary

So, I just found out why people buy TenaLady (for the 1st time ever)
Thanks OP!
Thanks Donald!
shuffles off to fetch fresh undies...

Eww eww eww.

Sympathies op. I once had a Margaret Thatcher sex dream (not even attracted to women). Seriously traumatising.

Melissa Mccarthy sees your future

"and every one of the women was ovulating left and right!"

The only cure is compete avoidance. I hear the arctic circle is nice until it melts

at little orange tictac
for MumBod

Oh boke.

God there are actual women walking about in this actual world who have actually been there. For realsies.

I don't know if they need medals or straitjackets. Probably both.

Little orange tictac

When you said little orange tick tack i thought you meant his junk

OMG who has a spare Tena lady I can use? About to literally PMSL.

He's harvesting them MumBod the green ones are the ones he's used.

Oh dear, MumBod - it just gets worse and worse. The TicTacs slew me.

Until today, I thought I had known true suffering, on account of my dream where Prince Andrew followed me around at a posh nobs' party and pressed his erection against the small of my back...

^^

Oh Boom you can join our support group for sure.

That dream is made all the more horrific by its plausibility. Prince Andrew would so do that, I reckon.

If I had the strength I would at the green tictacs. As it is I can barely muster a ginny watery smile...