To Kick These People Out #2

[FuckYouChrisAndThatHorse]

[[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1963190-To-kick-these-people-out?msgid=44535428 Original
thread]]

Summary anyone? :)

Ida, he would be in heaven. A captive audience.

I'll get him in training.

Enrique, me?! What's the fun in seeing me?! I'm just... Me.

Drop the 'just' Drop the where's the fun. We're on the second thread of proving where the fun is lady!
Can't you see what you've inspired? of course you can.

If we had to ask for a single post reply from everyone on here who wants to be your face to face friend, who wants to come and kick arse on your behalf, who just wants to hang out even when there's no arse to kick, we'd need a fair bit of space, even without the lurkers who fully admit to being lured out of hiding simply to join in.

Now, find some sheet music and start planning your costumes, you DH, DCs, puppy, roaming cat and stackable goats sans lonely goatherd, have rehearsals to plan

Ida that's an inspired idea.

Enrique :)

Dh has a lovely voice, I have a lovely... Amount of enthusiasm.

I'm delurking and realise a latecomer to Fuckyoufest but I can offer -

DS3 on xylophone and whistle, with bow and arrow if necessary

Elderberry wine (homemade) and,

A Yorkshire Grandmother complete with disapproving stare - we could stand her on the drive next to the benign nun in a kind of good cop bad cop arrangement

Fifi can your Yorkshire Granny hoick her bosom? Please??? like Norah Batty

I fear my dear friend the Turdis supplier mainly does the standard sort, however I will ask if they can spare any of the truly magnificent ones with proper flushes and washbasins and vanity mirrors and decent lighting.

Fifi, love it. No one can withstand a northern granny. It's a special kind of arm-crossing. And I love elderberry wine. The xylophone is a new addition to our percussion group too.

Betty, it would add an air of sophistication to proceedings.

OK forget the shed & Sven, I want to sleep in the super fancy Turdis with mood lighting.

[adds 'Yorkshire grandmother' to the list...]

I'm sure Sooty would be fine....

I know some welsh.

Poppity ping! :o

ThomasLynn I've got a lovely big tent you can buy borrow if you like. It's very warm (double skin) but we downsized as we were too short to put it up without a huge struggle ending in a row. If you are tall you will be fine. In fact there is so much room in there it could probably double as the beer tent.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes!

That's my all-time favourite joke.

Finally, here I am! I followed and failed to keep up with the first thread and have been doing my best to catch up and keep up with this one.

Ok, first off, for my entry to FYF I offer to supply all the random German Wurst (sausage/salami type stuff in many various colourful styles) and all the Brezeln (big yummy pretzels - none of the rubbish soft sprinkled with cinnamon ones, they are gross, believe me when you try these you will be in heaven... As long as you like bread) I can stuff into my luggage allowance.
I will also bring DS - who at almost 13 months loves to dance when people sing to him, he is a funny happy little chap and quite the flirt.

And I will bring DH - who could either help in the beer tent or just smile in a lovely way and explain beer to anyone who will listen (he is the German one )

Last, but absolutely not least.

Chris you are amazing and I have been touched, impressed and humbled by your name checking. I too have PND so am also slightly in awe of you and I want you to just take a moment to say to your self "I am awesome and brilliant and funny and kind" - go on, out loud! You come across as so lovely in all you posts I want to run over and give you a big cuddle.

There. Finally done it. And post....

Nutella, damnit, I appear to have something in my eye what a lovely post. Your dh and my dh will get on very well. My dh will explain why black sheep is the best beer and then will ask for taste testing to prove he's right.

I love wurst, and can't stand uk pretzels, so look forward to trying the real thing.

Jux, that is an amazing joke. I'm going to go and tell it to ds2, I think he'll appreciate its subtlety.

Pixel, we've got a huge tent too. They can be the chill out rooms if nothing else.

Glaikit, that's all you'll ever need to know!

Jersey, is that sooty from the dinner party thread? Or am I slow.

Ida, I reckon it'll be the place to be :)

Wing, excellent list keeping!

I've had a brilliant afternoon with the dcs making brownies. It's cheered me no end.

I think horse people's imminent, isn't the same as mine still no definite date.

Really sorry to be a lazy F*cker, but could someone just do a mini run down on where we've got to.....followed thread 1, work's been pretty shite and now can't read it all before I need to go out again!!! Nice lady still gone, horrid bonkers lady still bringing menagerie and parking in the driveway?

Nutella can I be your new best friend?
I bloody love a wurst! I've got a friend who sells them at shows. A nice smoked wurst, a nice bit of Germany mustard...

Shush, UW (unreasonable woman) as finally stopped parking on the drive (saying we didn't like it that she did was not enough, but telling her not to worked). She has also now cleared out the shed, and I suspect is no longer talking to us.

RL (reasonable lady) has been in touch to say they think they've found somewhere, and hopefully will be moving sometime in the next few weeks (although no date given as yet)

I'm quietly optimistic.

Oh and we 're having a huge festival to celebrate the empty field and return happiness to the home :)

Late in the day I am delurking, mainly to volunteer to bring and leave DD who has discovered a cat-baby hybrid noise that is shrill beyond belief. If she is quiet for an hour or so between now and the FFest, then I may have some blackberry vodka left to bring ( and you may want to think about cultivating some brambles, it's very nice)

mmmm .... Bockwurst. In a bun. With an awful lot of mustard mixed with mayonnaise. There is almost certainly a secret ingredient that is in fact sugar, or monosodium glutamate, or both, but I do not care. It is the food of the gods and there's this bloke with a stall on the market who sells it and I am hopelessly addicted.

He's quite a nice bloke. Shall I ask him to come to FYF?

But pants! All I have is brambles. Actually that's not true. I have black thorn too. It's a beautiful garden :)

Blackberry vodka could have me changing my view

Betty, for mine and saggy's sake, yes!

Blackberry vodka is thrifty (in that it is the only glut I seem to get but did at least mean that I could finally justify, if only to myself, that I was the kind of person who needs a trug). Do not however think that after decanting vodka from blackberries, that the left over blackberries count as one of your five a day and can be safely munched while cooking tea. I had to have An Early Night.

Going slightly off topic (thinking about posh loos), when I was about 17 my father took me out for dinner at a very smart hotel. At the end, I asked where the Ladies was and was directed to a room marked 'Ladies Withdrawing Room'. Inside was a large room with a lavatory in the corner, and two complete dressing table sets - plush seat, table, wash basin, vanity lighting round the mirrors - also a very nice sofa, two chairs and coffee table, and a chaise longue. But the lavatory had absolutely no surround - it was just, well, THERE. Wooden seat and a huge pile of spare loo rolls, but not even a curtain!

I am now desperately wishing it was not nearly 9 p.m. and the Bockwurst man long gone...

Oh, just noticed - blackthorn!

SLOE GIN EVERYONE!!!!