I made a complete tit of myself today and cannot stop cringing. Pat my shoulder

[Gatekeeper]

...and say "there there"

In meeting today and part of it was a discussion about personal illnesses or conditions each of us has/had. I mentioned that most of my family - female side has an underactive thyroid and that I have yearly blood tests as mine is slowly getting there. I said "Thyroid" about ten times

Only I didn't...

I said "prostate" and wondered why the rest of them were looking at me like this . I clocked what I'd said and said "No, not my prostate, my thryoid. I am actually a women, at least my husband thinks so" ending on a horrible, whinnying haw haw laugh that I haven't heard before.

Ended up doing a comedy wipe of my face, and knocked my glasses off, where they landed on the middle of the floor. I said "shite" when this happened and not quietly either.

Dear God...not one of them cracked a smile or reacted- just looked at me for a split second and then started talking about something else

CRINGE CRINGE CRINGE..I am squirming in my seat just thinking about it

Today's cringe is tomorrow's anecdote.

We all have our cringes to bear.

So, there there.

Second time this week I've had to go in the stationery cupboard at work because i'm laughing so much i've got tears running down my face

Poor you but ohhh my god the comedy face wipe and knocking glasses off KILLED me

There there... Oops!

There therepats head

That is brilliant and really just brightened up my dull day

oh god sorry Gatekeeper but that really made me laugh!

It is exactly the sort of thing I do all the time and is reassuring that I am not alone. It's the lack of reaction that makes it so much cringier isn't it?

Have a manly slap on the back from me

Wankers. How could they not appreciate what an awesome comedic moment you provided

There there Gatekeeper, it's not your fault they were miserable buggers.

It's actually quite funny

This kind of thing happens to me all the time. I'm dysphasic (getting better). No-one ever laughs

Sorry but im laughing so hard my prostate hurts.
Hooe youre ok. Miserable lot.

Sorry Gatekeeper but it is actually quite funny.

Did you do an Eric Morecambe glasses wiggle too?

That made me laugh out loud sorry, if nothing else, at least you have made someone laugh today!

Thank you so much for brightening up a crap afternoon at work.

Your embarrassment was not in vain.

There there

Oh Gatekeeper here's a big pat for your shoulder!

What a boring twunch of bunts you must work with, not to crack even a smile!

I do know what you mean about when a horrible sound comes out of you that you haven't heard before! Not fun.

Time and hopefully this thread too, will make you feel better!

Oh dear what a pack of dry arse wallys! Just think though you will look back and laugh, I promise. At least you never kicked a stray piece of underwear from the leg of your trousers across your workplace floor in front of your boss and half your colleagues................................ Not that it never happened to me like

Sorry that happened...

But you made me laugh!

I have asked the hairdresser for a "blowjob" before :0

In situations like this I fail to see how no one can laugh! It would make it 100 times better if they could have a giggle with you about it, what serious periods I've found myself in many a similar situation, many pats and a big !

I would have laughed

And thrown in an " Fuck, i always make a dick of myself too" - slightly too loudly so that everyone would have thought I was a right tosser too

Wahahahaha!

Almost as good as my mum announcing loudly to a hospital ward that my dad had a 'genital condition' (and not a CONgential condition). We laughed anyway.

Sorry you have to work with such a bunch of swivel eyed loons. Pat, pat, pat.

ohgodohgodohgod.

on my first day at a new job i was close to asking a director when he had met William Shatner.

in the split second before i opened my mouth i realised the photograph was, in fact, of his wife.

Are you my best friend cos she does this all the time!

Best one was when she declared loudly in a packed cafe that if she would ever have a son she would call him...

Wanker.

She meant mark.

She's lovely. Don't be embarrassed!

Oh I'm sorry but fucking hell that's funny.
I don't often lol but that's a doozy.

What do you do for an encore, trip over your feet and land faced down in the MD's lap?

If tried to give sympathy and head pats I fear I would come across as less than genuine.

Soz and all that.

Amazing.

mrswast

Thank you for sharing

Oh and there there.