Oddest phone call you have ever received from your dcs school?

[Mavend]

Today:"Hello,we are phoning you because a child has thrown one of your dcs shoes over the school fence.We are very sorry.The child in questions parents have been informed and are aware they may have a bill for the shoes.One of the TA's is trying to find the shoe"

Dear mumsnetters,I guess I should have been maybe been a little annoyed but I actually got a fit of the giggles.

I have a vision of this poor,poor TA,cursing and wandering about in the undergrowth searching for a Clarks schoolshoe.

[TheOriginalFAB]

This thread is brilliant but I haven't anything to add.

I was called as my son wasn't well so I abandoned my exercise dvd and rushed to school, only to be presented with another child who had the same first name as mine and was in the first class. I wanted it double checked that my son was okay. She said yes, she had just seen him. I was a bit since she had brought me another child but it turned out the receptionist was told one name and she rang another.

[mummynoseynora]

nothing to add here yet, DD starts reception in september but has survived preschool without anything too interesting!

[AnnieLobeseder]

I got a phone call from the school secretary at 4pm to ask me to come and help retrieve DD1 (5yo) from under a sofa! Or, failing that, if they could have my permission bodily remove her themselves.

She goes to after school club, but had decided she didn't want to go on this particular day as she had her scooter with her and had to carry it rather than scoot on it (they walk crocodile-fashion to the club so no scooting allowed, she knows this). So first she clung to the school fence, they prised her loose, she bolted into the reception area and scrambled under a sofa. For an hour they couldn't get her out! Poor after school club lady had to take the other children to the club, then come back with her car and then extract DD. And the school secretary had to sit with her while all this was going on.

DD was in sooooooooooooo much trouble! But the longer it went on, the more trouble she knew she was in so the more she refused to come out!

[youarekidding]

Annie Your DD has staying power.

[WhatFreshHellIsThis]

Not a phone call, but in the newsletter:

LOST - Girl's right shoe, size 2.5G, black leather Clarks Mary Jane, brand new
FOUND - Girl's right shoe, size 1H, black leather Clarks Mary Jane, brand new

[snotsville]

I have spent an age reading these posts. Brilliant.

I have one to add - although it wasn't the school at fault.

I phoned the school to let them know DS1 was sick & wouldn't be in. No answer, a machine kicked in, so I left a message.

About an hour later I got a phonecall from the school asking why DS1 wasn't there.

Me: Did you not get the message I left on your answering service? (Thinking, "bunch of muppets...")

School: We don't have an answering service.

Me: Oh....

[PurpleLostPrincess]

Again, not a phonecall...

I had not long split with xh so was managing DS and DD2 on my own while going through all the rubbish stuff that went with it.

DD2 was going through an awkward stage (aged around 4.5). At breakfast I had at least 3 different cereals but she didn't want any of them and refused to eat toast so I said 'fine, starve!'.

I got called into the school and put in front of the head who wanted to speak with me because DD2 had told them that I hadn't been feeding her - I was so !!! Once I explained she was very understanding, but at the beginning I was being told off for neglecting my daughter !!!!!

[PurpleLostPrincess]

Sorry, that was meant to be DD1! [blondemomenticon]

[Timetraveller]

When ds2 was about 7, I had a phone call from the school asking me to come in because ''ds has been found in the street outside the school by another parent''(!) He'd been worried because his class was being split up for maths, and he was going to have a teacher he didn't know. The head said she didn't understand how he'd managed to get out. But when I asked him, he said, 'It's easy - you just press the button and the gate opens'.

[mummimamma]

School nurse: You DS just ate a leaf at recess
Me: Oh. (Chuckling) So?
SN: Well, I called and checked with poison control and apparently it is okay, but he should be under observation for a hour, so can you come and get him?
I had a hard time not laughing, but I did go get him. Thankfully it was at the end of the school day anyway.

It was a maple leaf, btw

[bruffin]

"I think you dc has chickenpox"
...no he hasn't they got bitten by mosquitos on the nursery day trip to the wetland centre the day before...
they must have called all parents that day...

I had the same phonecall Mousy but ours were dutch mosquitos in centerparcs. For some reason they really like DS's blood.

[LynetteScavo]

One phone call which wasn't odd, but did make me sigh heavily was "could you come and collect DS1; he's had a fight with another boy involving black paint". The boys had found it quite funny, the class teacher didn't.

And the secretary I wanted to murder with my bare hands when PFB DS had been in reception for one week "I'm afraid DS has had an accident...." (I am imagining lots of blood and the air ambulance)..... his glasses are broken. Do you have a spare pair?

Yes I bloody do.

And then there was the time DS played up so badly at school I was politely called in to take him home. At the time DD who was 3, and I were merrily playing with hair clips at home. Only after sitting through a meeting with the head teacher, who advised I take him the the GP for a referral, did I realise I had 1000 hair clips in my hair.

And the classic one was "Hello Mrs Scavo, I'm just phoning because we have Ofsted in today and tommorow, and were wondering if you would like to keep DS1 at home"
I kid you not! At the time DS was school refusing, and would have kicked up a huge fuss. I was more than happy to keep him at home, but with hindsight I'm and and wish I'd taken him in to show Ofsted what the school was really like.

[tiggyhop]

School: Mrs Hop please come and collect Mini Hop, she has nits (again)
[I arrive in 10 mins]
At Reception: Me "I really do not think she has nits again, I treated her thoroughly this morning"
School: "Oh yes she has, here is one we saved on a piece of sellotape, look, there it is, can't you see it"
Me "I'll get my coat"

[natashakate]

Not had any about my DC but when my brother was at preschool my mum got a phone call asking them to collect him ASAP but wouldn't tell her why. When she arrived they explained that they were very sorry to hear about the sad news but wondered why she had not notified them of such a serious health risk. My mother was totally clueless and asked where my brother was. They told her they had him 'quarantined' in a separate room at the moment, at which point my mum asked WTF is going on? Turns out my DB had told all the staff that he was HIV positive! It was at the time when Mark had been diagnosed in EastEnders - God knows how my brother found out as no-one in our family has ever watched it. He's never quite lived it down.

[MrsCMAW]

I have just laughed tea out of my nose and had to stop reading before anything worse happens!

[pestroid]

Not a phone call, but, when ds was 5 I was asked not to put ds in boxers and short trousers on summer days, he had inadvertantly flashed a Nun in assembly. (he is a big boy ) I was more impressed that he had managed to cross his legs in his wheelchair.

[all4u]

Love these! My call was from form teacher of DD in year 7 to inform me that they had had to stop her plaing poker with her friends as they didn't think it was 'suitable'. DD assured me that they hadn't been playing for money - yet. We had taught DD and DS poker whilst home educating as it is really good for maths and probablility and they just took to it and brother and sister would disappear off to play a hand in complete camararderie...

[magpie2]

A friend of mine got a call from our school to ask her why her DD's gums are so pink...turns out my friend gave her DD one of those tartar revealing tablets that morning.

[florianne1]

This wasn't a call but a letter from secondary school: your son has been excluded from school for 3 days for calling a teacher a gingernut b***d. Awful, but hilarious to see written down.

[Cutiecat]

Last year we were stuck in America when the dust cloud struck. We could not fly home as planned so i called school and explained that DS would be back when Virgin had reallocated us with a flight. I then emailed our return date when are new flights came through with notes for a parents rep meeting i would be missing. I don't think i could have done much more but I still got a call from school on my mobile a few days later...

School - Hello Mrs Cutiecat can we enquire why your son has not been in school.
Me - i called and emailed to explain the situation as we are stuck in America due to the dust cloud.
School - Yes we know that it is just that everyone else who was 'stuck' has now made it back.
Me - Well where were they 'stuck'?
School - well Deputy Head was in Germany and Mrs C was in Portugal.
Me - Well that is slightly different what do you expect us to do? Swim.

It was the final straw for me as DS was unhappy there anyway, when we got home I started the process of moving him to another school.

[mashyup]

Not a phone call..but a request from teacher of ds who was 6 at the time to 'have a word with me after school'. Heartsink. So I went in to classroom where she showed me the lovely quilt the class was making by each child decorating a piece of fabric then they were all sewed together. My son had carefully decorated his with the word 'fuck'. She did compliment him on getting the spelling right though