Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 6. ALL welcome!

[Sunbird24]

If you’re going through this, you’re not alone. I’ll post some links to support organisations shortly, but feel free to post, or just read, whatever you need.

Hi everyone. Tentatively joining here. I found out I was 4 weeks pregnant last week after trying for a few years. Started bleeding last night and had to go to a&e - I did a pregnancy test whilst there (on nurse's orders), it was positive so I had to see a doctor who suspected a miscarriage. I also passed a few large clots. Feeling numb and the grief is hitting in waves. Thinking it is my fault somehow for worrying. Sending love to you all 💜

Sorry I’ve been a bit absent lately, lots going on at the mo with work and house moves.

Sorry to see new people, and that others are still going through it, I hope you all have real life support too.

@bwfcchick88 its absolutely not your fault in anyway, it’s just shit that happens and we often never find out why.

Hi again everyone haven't posted in a few days. Had contractions again yesterday so painful. Called EPU who told me to do a test which I have done I think there's a very faint line, but I called them back and told them and they said sounds like it's negative and that they don't think the pain/contractions I've been getting is related to the miscarriage sigh so helpful 🙄. What do you guys think? Xxx

It’s definitely showing positive (not Ben that faint in my opinion), I’d call them back and insist that they see you. Good luck!

@B1993 my GP is calling me this afternoon. See what they say. I just went a wee and for the first time in I think just over 2 weeks there was no blood when I wiped! Well no fresh blood xxx

@Brokenpancreas94 still a line there isn’t there 😔 I don’t see how the pain wouldn’t be related to the mc xxx

@ChloeN yeah there is! I've been a wee twice since doing a test this morning and there's no fresh blood now it seems to be old and pretty much nothing, maybe I am coming towards the end now but it has been going on for ages 😢xxx

Hi @Brokenpancreas94 how many weeks have you been bleeding? I have bled every day for nearly 5 weeks after my surgical management. It took me till week 3 to show negative on a digital pregnancy test, I was still having the faint line on the strip test till last week. I have also been experiencing pain. I went for a scan with my EPU which confirmed I still have some blood clots to pass, even though I had surgery xx

Hi @Sophiey11 I have been bleeding for just over 3 weeks now. I have just spoke to my GP who is calling the early pregnancy unit herself to see what they say. Although now I've not had any blood when I wipe after going to the toilet so I've no idea what's going on! I never had surgical, I went down the natural route. I just hate the unknown and not knowing what's going on if that makes sense? Hope your bleeding starts to end soon too! Xxx

@ChloeN @B1993 @Sophiey11 booked in for a scan Wednesday morning, but got to do another test tomorrow night and if there's still a line then I've defo got to go in if not then I won't need the scan xx

@Brokenpancreas94 glad you’ve got a scan booked in. Although my test was negative, my scan with the EPU showed something was still there. They think it’s clots. If you’re still bleeding like me, maybe you will have the same. They didn’t seem too concerned though. Just sent me home and said wait for it to pass naturally. Hope it all goes okay for you xx

@Sophiey11 I think I want to be scanned regardless of the test as then atleast I will know what's going on. Thank you lovely xxx

Hi guys,

Heartbreakingly I am having to join this thread but feel as though talking to others will help. Apologies if anything I say is triggering as my story may be quite graphic. I lost my baby on Saturday at 13 weeks pregnant after hearing the heartbeat just a day before.
i originally bled for the first time on the 5th October which was obviously distressing so I rang EPU and got seen and scanned everything was fine. Since that bleed I had been bleeding on and off from brown to pink to red to some little clots. Each time more worried than the last but I went for multiple scans and cervix checks baby was fine at every scan and my cervix was always closed.
I had my 12 week scan just last Monday and again baby was fine and even measuring ahead of our dates by a couple of days but I was still bleeding only bits of pink.
Then last Wednesday my bleeding got heavier with a clot the size of a 50p and I was in quite a bit of pain I ended up going to A&E on Thursday night where I got seen and told my cervix was closed but they booked me in with EPU on Friday just gone. They didn’t scan me but they used a Doppler and found baby’s heart beat and again my cervix was closed but they did think I had a uti based on my urine sample and was surprised I wasn’t already on antibiotics? So they started me on those and that was that.
Then…Saturday happened. I stayed in bed all day as I just didn’t feel well at all but I put this down to the UTI - I was still bleeding but not an alarming amount and still cramping but again not severe and I thought it may be due to the UTI. But at 3pm on Saturday my pains just became unbearable I have never in my life had pain like it I was screaming in agony that my partner had to ring an ambulance. (This is the part that my be triggering for some) I then felt a gush and asked my partner to look he couldn’t see anything but I had gushed a clear liquid and my pains just stopped. Not long after I had another of red blood and then another gush. This gush was when my baby was born and placenta. My partner got the baby, baby was tiny could fit in my partners hand but was perfectly formed. We were both in absolute shock how could this happen when I had heard the heartbeat just a day before?

the last 48 hours have been a whirlwind I have finally left hospital and they are sending the placenta for testing and have also done a lot of blood tests on me to see if they can find anything. We are also able to have baby cremated and to receive the ashes. I’m just still so shocked and don’t understand could of my uti have caused this? Could this have been prevented if I was put on antibiotics sooner 😔

this is my first ever pregnancy and of course we naively believed once we reached 12 weeks we would somehow be immune to anything happening.
we want to try again but at the same time we are terrified of history repeating itself. I also don’t know when to expect to ovulate or anything.
me and my partner are mentally just broken from this as we were planning to find out the gender in a matter of weeks and we had just announced to everyone we were pregnant.
sorry for rambling I just don’t know what to do or where to turn. Xx

Hi @BabyPip96 firstly so sorry for your loss, it is horrible. I should have been finding out the gender of my baby in a couple of weeks too. I too had a UTI, twice actually! The first time was when I found out that I was pregnant and the second time was after my 10 week booking in appointment (baby had already died by then but I wasn't to know). So I don't even think my UTI had disappeared! Anyway, I don't think UTI's cause miscarriages because I googled this even before I knew my baby had stopped growing. Everything that I found online just said that UTI's in early pregnancy is common and are unlikely to cause a miscarriage.
I hope you get some answers. Sending lots of love xxx

@BabyPip96 I'm so, so sorry for your loss and everything you've been through. I ovulated about a week after the bleeding stopped all three times but everyone is different. Hopefully the tests will give you some answers x

@BabyPip96 so sorry for your loss, that sounds so traumatic😔 I would of been the same as you, 12 week does seem like the safe mark! I’m sure it wasn’t the uti, they’re so common in pregnancy but I know how easy it is to blame yourself! I don’t think I ovulated until after my first period, which came right on time so hopefully it won’t be too much of a wait for you xx

@BabyPip96 what an awful experience for you, that must have been a dreadful shock, I’m so sorry

@Brokenpancreas94 hi lovely, so sorry for your loss too it’s so difficult isn’t it. I think logically I know the UTI probably didn’t cause it, I just think I’m trying to find something or anything to blame 😔 xx

@Marmite83 thanks so much lovely. That is good to know about ovulation, we definitely want to try again I’m really struggling with the fact I’m not pregnant now and just want to be pregnant again but at the same time I’m terrified of this happening again 😔

@ChloeN thank you so much, I know loss can happen at any stage but I suppose you just never think it will happen to you xx

@Sunbird24 thank you I think me and my partner have definitely got some trauma from what happened that evening. We haven’t been back to the house yet as it gives us too much pain, my dad has gone on holiday so we are staying at his house for the week. We have done a lot of crying/talking even laughing(feels wrong to laugh). We have ordered about £40 worth of Chinese tonight haha and plan to catch up on some shows we are behind on x

@BabyPip96 oh definitely, you hear about it but it’s not something you’d ever think would really happen despite the worrying! You can get through it and I’m sure we’ll all have our rainbow babies soon❤️

@Brokenpancreas94 hope you get some answers at your scan or your neg test!! Xxx

@tulipsunday how are you lovely?? Did you ovulate? Xxx

@BabyPip96 so so difficult. Yes it's so easy to blame yourself, at the start of my pregnancy I had terrible nausea and sickness and because I'm type 1 diabetic I had to take the stronger folic acid, but I couldn't stomach them so I wasn't taking them as often as I should, I blame myself for that too, and also the fact that I wasn't seen by anyone not even diabetes unit at all in my pregnancy, whereas with my daughter they was seeing me weekly from 7 weeks onwards, but in reality I will never know and it probably wasn't because of any of that xxx

@ChloeN I think I want the scan regardless of the result of the test, because then I think it will give me peace of mind that hopefully everything is out of my system! Really don't want to be experiencing these contractions next week on holiday! Xxx

@ChloeN i know one day it won’t hurt so much right now it just feels impossible and I’m terrified me and my partner will never bring a baby home 😔 xx

@Brokenpancreas94 i completely understand in regards to the folic acid, I should have been taking a higher dose and didn’t even realise till further down the line which made me feel so guilty even though in reality it probably didn’t change anything at all. I think it’s easy to blame ourselves when deep down nothing we did or didn’t do would change what the outcome would be but it doesn’t make it hurt any less 😔

So sorry @BabyPip96 to hear what you have been through. The pain, hurt and confusion are absolutely horrible and we can all relate. I hope you are getting good support. Don't worry about saying anything upsetting/triggering this is just the place for those difficult thoughts and questions.

@Brokenpancreas94 @Sophiey11 hope you are both ok and soon without bleeding and pain.

@ChloeN I can't remember if I said or not but my cycle ended up only being 18 days as I had another period so a bit confusing. So don't think I ovulated as didn't get positive ovulation tests or any other signs. Guess my body is settling down still since MMC.. bit annoying. Where are you in your cycle?

@Brokenpancreas94 scan sounds like a good idea, definitely give you peace of mind that it’s all okay!

@BabyPip96 totally agree I feel like that sometimes too. I worry I’m not ovulating now or there’s something wrong with all the eggs or all the sperm!

@tulipsunday thats really irritating, hopefully that’ll be enough to reset your cycles! I’m 4dpo today so a while yet to get symptoms if I’m lucky enough to get pregnant this cycle!