Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 2. ALL welcome!

[AMS19]

Hi ladies

This thread is open for EVERYONE. To discuss the highs, lows, emotions, and experiences of us all going through our miscarriage journey. Together we will get through this!

Previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/4119053-Support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-MC-MMC?pg=1

To my incredible strong warriors...I cannot believe we filled a thread! We've got this ladies ❤
@DMT1982
@Scottishskifun
@glowingtwig
@mia2201
@Redfoxinthesnow
@Seasalt1984
@laurat94
@tamsin424
@cocoloco88
@SuzieDeLaTour
@Cordial11
@seasalt1984
@thehotelcalifornia
@TheDaydreamBelievers
@Pettylamby
@Lililou
@Enola41
@CocoLoco88
@Nicolamac1
@Sleeeeeepy
@Mellous
@Nicolamac1
@Semla
@Seasidestarfruit
@mummydoingamasters
@elm7
@MrsD1992
@CookieMonster3001
@Dryshampoo32

Sincere apologies for missing anyone xx

@AMS19 the positive line does look really faint, you're nearly there. I like your analogy about jumping back in, I think that's the approach we're going to take & I'm trying to not focus too much on how I'll cope/deal with a future pregnancy (until it happens).

@LauraT94 Don't get my started on pregnancy apps, I thought I had deleted everything but another couple of emails popped up. Your 'treatment' sounds appalling and I hope you can get the scan today.

@Seasalt1984 I'm pleased you've got the negative test, I felt such a mix of emotions too, it really does mark the end of it all and that final confirmation can be hard to accept.

@Mellous I was the same. So wanted to wait for a period but I'm not even waiting for negative tests now. As soon as I got to 2 weeks jumped back on it (literally 😉)

@Redfoxinthesnow it's going to be super tough dealing with the anxiety but hopefully we can all help each other through it, share any positive messages/stories we find etc. Where are you now? Just waiting for a period on cracking on?

@AMS19 when did you stop bleeding? I'm dying to get rid of the constant pad wearing now!

@Mellous I only had proper bleeding for a day or two then very much spotting. That was on and off, most days only when I wiped but a tiny bit of the pads. I stopped wearing pads completey probably about 11/12 days after. When we had sex the first and 2nd time there was a bit of spotting again. Mainly mixed with CM. I didnt have any spotting after sex last night though

Hello everyone..I’m new to the group so want to share my mmc story and get some advice and other peoples experience. I started spotting at 6 weeks exactly which lasted a week, proper bleeding started a week later and then on the 5th day of proper bleeding I passed the sac which was on Sunday night just gone. I bled yesterday but today has been on and off spotting. I just wondered if this resonates with anyone and also how long I should expect the spotting to continue? I POAS and got a medium line (not very faint but not strong either I reckon hcg in the hundreds). I would like to DTD when I ovulate this cycle ..wondering when that will be. Did everyone here count their CD1 as the first day of heavy bleeding? Xx

Sorry I forgot to clarify it was natural miscarriage. The scan yesterday showed it was completed.

Hi @Slk3558 it sounds like we've had very similar experiences as I had a natural miscarriage at 6 weeks too. I found that the bleeding/spotting stopped completely after 2.5 weeks, but there were a couple of times when the bleeding stopped for a couple of days and then started again which was frustrating. I hope yours settles down soon.

Hi girls sorry for the radio silence I’ve had a busy couple of days at work.
Just saying hey and will catch on what everyone has been posting later this evening xxx

Hey guys, good news that they managed to get me in for a scan around midday! All pregnancy tissues have been passed 🥳 so that's a massive relief! Everything else looks good apart from a bit of fluid around the outside of my uterus - it looks like my cyst has popped/is breaking down! So that could definitely be contributing to the pain. Bloods and urine both clear of infection but I've had an extra dose of antibiotics just in case. And I finally have my extra strong painkillers! Feeling a lot more positive now.

@AMS19 although not a negative your test is looking so light! That's brilliant. Have you been testing in FMU? And I can totally understand the situation you're in where you were waiting for a period, then downgraded to waiting for a negative, and now just going for it 😂 I feel like that's a glimpse into my future!!

@Slk3558 hi! I'm sorry for your loss. Yes I would count first proper day of heavy bleeding as CD1. I've marked the day of my MVA as CD1. There's no way of telling how soon you'll ovulate or how 'normal' this cycle will be before your next period. If you temp or use OPKs these might be helpful to pinpoint ovulation but OPKs can show false positives when your HCG levels are still high x

@Mellous I've just moved onto using the flexible panty liners instead of pads - my bleeding is still there but mainly when I go to the toilet and when I wipe! I.e. not much going into a pad. So I wanted to go back to wearing thongs and not feel like I'm wearing pads - the panty liners are great for that!! But totally depends how heavy your flow is at the mo x

@Redfoxinthesnow hope you've managed to stop all the emails now! They're very intrusive aren't they?!

@TheDaydreamBelievers my fingers are so strongly crossed for your TWW! ❤️

@Seasalt1984 congrats on the negative! That's the next big step I'm really looking forward to.

@CocoLoco88 thank you! Pain is better today and even better now I'm on 30mg codeine 😂

@SuzieDeLaTour thank you - yes it was so isolating being alone in hospital for so long!!

@Slk3558 so sorry for your loss. Just to add to what the ladies above had said I was told I would ovulate when the HCG was very low. Think squinter on a FRER. So when you ovulate probably depends how long it takes for hcg to leave your system rather than a certain day of your cycle this time

@LauraT94 oh that's such amazing news!!! Im so so happy to hear this!!! You can totally relax now and know the worst part is definitely done. What a pain about the cyst but doesn't sound anything to worry about

@DMT1982 good to hear from you. Look forward to hearing your updates later

@LauraT94 oh that’s great news, what a relief!! 🙌🏻🙌🏻 Glad you’ve got the strong stuff to get you through any more pain and yay to feeling more positive about everything 🎉
@AMS19 @Mellous oh god I know what you mean about the wait! I told myself I would definitely wait until my first period this time and my DH is not sure he wants to try again so soon (slight hurdle right there!!) but now I’m already counting the days and wondering whether I’ll be strong enough to hold off during ovulation!? I’m only 3 days post op and still very much bleeding / feeling like I’m an adult baby in nappies so shouldn’t really be my priory right now but there we go!! 😅

@AMS19 great news your tests getting lighter. You make me giggle, jumping back in 😂 I don’t blame you and sex can actually be a great healer for you both. I stopped spotting a couple of days ago and think I’ll ovulating at the mo or about to. I’ve got that stringy egg white discharge and want sex (not that I’m doing it at the mo as only just stopped spotting so wanted to wait until I had not spotted for 4/5 days, don’t know why just in my head I want to)
If we were TTC then I would be jumping in but we are waiting for a couple of months.

I’m at the supplement stage of the book, it’s taking me ages as I’m reading another book on nutrition at the same time (thanks for link to softener it’s so much cheaper on Amazon isn’t it I was shocked and have ordered!)

So a load of supplements arrived yesterday from my auntie who ordered them for me through Zita West who is a fertility expert and midwife. I have the fertility pack which includes DHEA as I’m over 35 so will begin taking them tomorrow.

@LauraT94 apparently cysts are very painful but again don’t cause any issues and come and go. I had a scan for one a few months ago and the doctor at EPU said if I did have them it wasn’t anything to be concerned about as they are there one min and not the next. Sometimes they scan you 6 weeks after if they find one to check if it’s gone or not xx

@DMT1982 yeah my resistance has completely gone to pot. I have no idea what my body is doing. If I don't have the positive tests I'd definitely think I was ovulating. My body obviously wants to - I also had the same fertile discharge too

I'd be super interested on what supplements your taking!! You'll have to send me the list so I can compare. I've upped my Ubiquinol to 400mg per day now. Started with 200mg but decided to go for the max.
Anything else interesting from the nutrition book?

@suziedelatour honestly I have zero control!! But...the good thing is there is a huge silver lining when I get my period. Then I'm in a fresh cycle, can have a glass of wine, and concentrate on properly trying with OPks etc. You reckon your husband will cave? I didnt even ask my husband, just told him we are jumping straight back in! No time to waste 😂😂

@AMS19 that’s interesting you have the same discharge so maybe I’m not ovulating after all.

The website is called Zita West and I’ll try to attach some photos of what my Aunt sent me. I’m a nightmare with attaching things!

The nutrition side of things seems to be mirroring the Mediterranean Diet if I’m honest so what you’re doing already is spot on xx

Ok so the book is the one that on nutrition and I’ve attached the photos of what supplements she’s sent me xx

If I come across any pearls of wisdom I’ll post them. Just reading the egg book about caffeine......I’m waiting to read the part about having half a glass of coffee a day!! Xx

Thanks @DMT1982 thats really interesting. I'll take a look at the website. Yes anything interesting do let me know!

I've been consulting Dr Google and I'm feeling better about trying again. The one time Google is actually more positive than negative seems to be when trying after one miscarriage. That said in the same search looked up fertility clinics for recurrent miscarriage 🤦‍♀️
Any updates on when your tests might happen?

@SuzieDeLaTour adult baby made me laugh as that’s exactly how I feel !! Still bleeding too but that didn’t stop me ordering ovulation sticks off Amazon haha. I haven’t got a clue when I’ll be ovulating, my cycle must be so messed up now.

@AMS19 I follow that trend as well, one min I’m super positive and the next I’m thinking it’ll never happen and I’m too old so start focusing on IVF and egg retrieval!!

I think the supplements are what have been recommended in the book but DHEA is for older ladies (me!) so I’ve got those as well. You are a young spring chicken so stick with the ones you have. I’m just reading about male fertility so pleased she sent me the ones for my hubby as well. We will all be rattling when we walk at this rate! Xxx

@DMT1982 honestly nothing sends you crazy like trying to conceive, hey!
I'll stick with Ubiquinol for now. I am tempted by these:
www.zitawest.com/product/vitafem-boost/
I'm drinking Pom wonderful as I think that's a good antioxidant.
Yeah whatever happens with baby or no baby, our insides are going to be growing 😂😂 xxx

@AMS19 no idea when I’ll get my tests as still waiting on NHS but have until the 27th January and my Benenden kicks in so I can use that and get this show on the road xx

Hi Ladies, I hope you don’t mind me joining the thread. I miscarried at the beginning of December, AF arrived four weeks later so I’m approaching my fertile week. Ironically I was starting to feel a bit better about the miscarriage, now I’m getting closer to ovulating (fingers crossed) I’m terrified. So despite the unfortunate reason for this thread, it will be lovely to speak to ladies who have gone through it all too. Xx

@DMT1982 that's not too long. One step in the right direction 🤞

@Summersun001 welcome. I'm so so sorry! We are all at various stages in our journey. I'm still less than 3 weeks since my procedure so early days for me. I'm still waiting for negative tests so haven't started trying again yet. I can totally understand how you must be feeling. I think @TheDaydreamBelievers is our only lady who has actively tried so far?! I could be wrong! Xx

hello ladies! to all the new women who have joined the group- I'm Mia, i'm turning 35, my first MMC happened 5 weeks ago. I got the option and went for MVA under general and had a rather good experience recovering (if you can call that). In my case, I was devastated but not entirely shocked as I was so full of energy and my boobs stopped hurting. I kept saying to everyone I just don't feel pregnant. I did to begin with, no nausea but a bit of food aversion and tiredness and then it all went 2 days before my early private scan where we saw a beautiful 170BPM heartbeat. That put my fears to rest, I thought- oh I'm just bloody lucky, no symptoms it is... 12 week scan comes and as soon i saw the bean on the screen I said oh it's not big enough is it and the sonographer went- really sorry it won't be good news, no heartbeat baby died 8wks 3 days. It was awfully sad as it was a planned and wanted pregnancy and I was on cloud nine all those weeks. What can I say today is -it gets better each day, I promise you that. I got my period today and I am so humbled by my body going throught this all and I believe it will happen again. I've never been so happy about a period- it means I'm back to square one. I know some of you are in the middle of the process and it's hard to see the light, give it time, day by day. Ask for help, post here, and call the hospital if you're unsure about anything. They might be stretched but they have the duty of care! with regards to coffee- I mix one scoop of caffeinated and 2 of decaf and only have it in the morning, that's my caffeine intake for now. We will be trying again as of this month and I'm allowing myself some coffee, and wine too ;)