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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

Missed Miscarriage

602 replies

Hol54321 · 21/04/2020 14:31

Hi Ladies,

Just looking for some friends at this devastating time. It's one of those, that will never happen to me moments but sure enough it did. Went along to my 12 week scan and boom, I'm hit with the news that baby has no heartbeat. They also said baby looked smaller than expected so did an internal scan too. They measured baby and said it was approx just over 9 weeks. Can not explain the effects on both myself and my husband. It was our first baby. Gone but never forgotten 💖

OP posts:
CountryGirl84 · 29/09/2020 12:35

@KM89 I’m so sorry to hear your experience but thank goodness you were in hospital and they knew to scan you again so you were able to do surgical management. I’m just worried that I might wait 3 weeks only for them to realise I still have a lot to come out and then have to do the surgical route anyway.
I’m pretty sure the main bit came out though as it was 10cm long so I’m hopeful that was it and I’ve had a lot of other clots. I also did a pregnancy test and it’s negative so that’s a good sign I hope. I’m still bleeding but at least the cramps have stopped. I will just have to see what happens over the next week and if it gets worse go back into the hospital and hope they will give me an early scan.

gypsywater · 29/09/2020 19:39

@KeepSmiling89
Sorry to hear you're going through this too. It's so upsetting and horrible. I have my next EPU appt on Fri to discuss management options but have noticed some bleeding past two days so perhaps it is starting to happen naturally too. It sucks.
How are you feeling?

gypsywater · 29/09/2020 19:41

@CountryGirl84
Thank you. Hope you dont need any surgery and it's all been sorted for you physically now. And wishing everyone on here lots of luck with their TTC journey. We will get there!

KeepSmiling89 · 29/09/2020 20:47

@gypsywater thank you. Yeah, it sucks big time. Today's been the longest day ever. Just want it to be over. Don't know what to do with myself just now. Spoke with my manager today who is amazing and just said not to think about work so I'm on sick leave for now until I say otherwise.
So sorry to hear that. How are you feeling? Reading stories on hear is so reassuring though and the support on here is incredible.

gypsywater · 29/09/2020 20:57

@KeepSmiling89
Happy to chat any time. It's a really isolating experience and I've defo found these threads helpful. I'm feeling better emotionally each day (found out last Weds). A bit of pain like period cramps but not too bad yet. Think I will opt for the tablets as want the best chance of clearing everything and getting it fully sorted. I assume there will be a follow up scan to make sure that has happened? Hope your EPU is decent.

KeepSmiling89 · 29/09/2020 21:27

@gypsywater I've done a bit of research and I think I'll go for the tablets too as I don't really want to wait for nature to take its course. If baby is stuck at 7 weeks, that's 5 weeks we've been waiting already. Yeah, I have a scan tomorrow at early pregnancy unit (EPU?) to confirm then consultation appt straight after to discuss options. The midwife today was lovely so hopefully they'll be as supportive at the EPU.

gypsywater · 29/09/2020 22:04

@KeepSmiling89 Best of luck tomorrow at the EPU. Let me know how you decide to proceed. Good to have some support through it I think! Were you trying for long before falling pregnant? Flowers

KeepSmiling89 · 29/09/2020 22:16

@gypsywater thanks. Yeah the support here is incredible. DH is being amazing too. We'd been trying for 4 months before falling pregnant, 2nd month using OPKs and first pregnancy.

gypsywater · 29/09/2020 22:20

@KeepSmiling89
I fell pregnant second month of using OPKs too! Also first baby. Had six months of guessing with apps before that but OPKs majorly helped. I'm 35 so need to get cracking again soon!

Elizamcklittle · 03/10/2020 23:23

Hi everyone. I am so sorry to those that this has affected. How do you know if it’s happening? Was it just a case of finding out at the scan? Were there any tell tale signs before? This page is a great way to get support and answers x

gypsywater · 04/10/2020 00:22

I had concerns as was noticing a little bit of spotting plus at the same time my nausea (which had been bad) had completely gone and my boobs had shrunk back to normal size having gone up a cup. Booked a private scan and they told me it was a MMC there and then. This was at 9+4. Confirmed two days later at EPU. The actual miscarriage happened naturally a few days ago, at 10+4. Should be 11 weeks today but alas this was not my time Sad

KeepSmiling89 · 05/10/2020 00:45

@Elizamcklittle Hi there. My nausea stopped completely and I had a tiny bit of spotting for 1 day but other than that, nothing. That was at around 10 weeks or so. I also didn't really have any other symptoms other than fatigue (no breast changes etc).
I called my midwife a couple of times with my concerns but, as there was nothing physically evident that something was going wrong, I had to hang tight until my 12 week scan.

Maybe it was "mother's instinct" or something, but I just had a bad feeling that something wasn't right. I hoped I would be one of those positive stories that everything turned out to be ok (because every woman is different and symptoms come and go etc...), but sadly it wasn't.

KeepSmiling89 · 05/10/2020 00:47

Oh...I should have been 12+5 at my scan, but baby was only measuring at around 7 weeks and there was no heartbeat. When I had my scan at EPU the next day, they were struggling to even see the baby at all.

gypsywater · 05/10/2020 07:58

@KeepSmiling89 Your experience sounds really similar to me in noticing a very sudden drop away of the nausea. I totally had that instinct too that it was over. I just knew.

CountryGirl84 · 05/10/2020 08:56

@Elizamcklittle my nausea had dropped a little and my breasts didn’t feel as full but I was 10 weeks at the time and they say that can happen when the placenta takes over so I was hoping it was that. My tummy had started to show by my 12 week scan and I hadn’t had any spotting so I was hopeful it was going to be okay but sadly I’d had a mmc at 8 weeks and yet my body didn’t know and was continuing to pump the hormones. There’s unfortunately no way of knowing 100% until a scan. My friend had reduced nausea and was worried before her scan and had a beautiful healthy baby so it’s really difficult to tell.

Littleonefirsttime · 05/10/2020 10:29

Thanks @CountryGirl84 for sharing - I have my emergency scan at 12pm today so I will soon know the outcome for me. I feel the same in that sense - I just feel fine really, and have for such a long time, apart from slightly sore boobs. I am either really lucky or really unlucky. I will let you know the outcome. x

CountryGirl84 · 05/10/2020 11:12

@Littleonefirsttime hoping all goes well today. Keeping all my fingers and toes crossed for you x

Littleonefirsttime · 05/10/2020 13:42

Hi everyone. So I’ve just had a scan at 12 weeks and it ended up being a missed miscarriage. I am a little confused over something - they said the baby looks about 6 weeks and is 4mm and as it isn’t over 7mm I have to have another scan next week. Not sure why this is? I’d have thought it was the other way round and as it’s so small it’s definitely not okay? Can anyone offer any advice here. Thanks

Littleonefirsttime · 05/10/2020 13:43

@CountryGirl84 missed miscarriage was the outcome x

CountryGirl84 · 05/10/2020 14:13

@Littleonefirsttime I’m so sorry to hear that. My heart goes out to you. Not sure why they want to wait a week for another scan if they know it’s a mmc. I would question that otherwise you’re having to wait for the same outcome when I’m sure you want to deal with it now. Mine was dealt with on the same day. Hopefully someone else on here might have had a similar experience and be able to help x

gypsywater · 05/10/2020 18:18

@Littleonefirsttime
So sorry to hear that. Its heartbreaking. The reason for asking you to come back for another scan is just in case you are incorrect about your dates and actually less far gone that you might think. They have to cover themselves as some women are not 100% sure of their dates. It is frustrating when you know your dates are spot on (have had the same recently). Flowers

gypsywater · 05/10/2020 18:20

@Littleonefirsttime Having re-read your post, my response re the need for a second scan may not be correct. Perhaps they meant the gestational sac needing to be a certain size to make firm conclusions (again the case in my MMC).

Busybee32 · 26/01/2021 08:56

Hi all,
I’m hoping someone can help me. I had my LMP on the 16th November. I took and OPK and got peak fertility on the 27th November. I got a positive test on 8th December and took about 20 tests to confirm. I had my first midwife appointment last Friday and was so excited we booked a private scan for yesterday (10weeks).

At the scan she said she could only see a sac and yolk. She said I was measuring at 7 weeks 4 days. She said she couldn’t say much but that I would need a scan in 2 weeks to see if any change. When I started crying and saying I didn’t understand the assistant said it might not be a viable pregnancy and could be a missed miscarriage. They also said I had an internal bleed. My DH and I are coming to terms with the fact it is likely a mmc. I haven’t stopped crying all night and feel so silly for being so naive and getting so excited.

I’m waiting to ring my EPU but just wanted to see what everyone thought? Even though, I know it isn’t good 😔😔 xx

CountryGirl84 · 06/02/2021 10:31

I’m so sorry @Busybee32 I have only just seen this and seen no one’s replied to you yet. Have you had much of an update since or are you still waiting for your next scan? It’s so hard going through this, my heart goes out to you xx

Busybee32 · 06/02/2021 11:40

Awww thank you @CountryGirl84 really sweet of you to reply. I have sadly. Had my second scan on the Wednesday at the EPU. They confirmed that the sac was empty and that maybe I was just too early. However, I was 99% sure on my dates. They said due to my first scan being private, they had to legally under the NHS have 2 scans. So I had to go back on Wednesday for that to confirm. I hadn’t miscarried naturally and the sac was still growing. The cruelest thing, your body still thinking you are pregnant. As we were leaving for the hospital, my scan letter came. My 12 week scan would be next Friday 😭 on Wednesday they confirmed the sac was empty. They talked me through all my options and did my bloods and Covid test. They said that it was unlikely it would happen naturally and that the medical management is only 50% effective. I must say everyone I came into contact with at the hospital were absolutely amazing!!! My husband could also be there for it all too!

I had my MVA yesterday under local. I was really anxious but have to say, it was a little uncomfortable to start. I had gas and air and a wonderful midwife with me and my husband just outside the room. It was quick and I was home 1 hour later. Just resting now and trying to be kind to myself. Hoping we fall pregnant on the next cycle and that this time we have a healthy baby. As soon as I saw the pregnancy test, I couldn’t help but plan and let my mind run away with me. I’m finding that hard now and I’m sad we will never have that excitement again as I will be so anxious.

Thank you again so much for asking! Really kind ❤️ Xxxx