First Pregnancy Missed Miscarriage

[sadtoday21]

Hi ladies! Our last thread was automatically closed because we reached the 1,000 post limit. I was hoping we would be able to start a new thread called First Pregnancy Post-MMC, but unfortunately we are not quite there yet. I know we will be someday soon! In the meantime, I hope you will all join me on here as we continue on this journey together. You have all been an invaluable source of inspiration, support, and kindness for me and I want to thank you for making me feel less alone in this.

About me, for any newcomers: First MMC in February at 12 weeks (baby passed at nine), D&C the next day, found out five weeks later that it was a partial molar pregnancy and currently undergoing follow-up with CX. Second early mc in April. Now impatiently waiting to be cleared from CX before ttc again.

@Kelpies I'm so glad to hear that the surgery went well and you're feeling more positive about the future. And yes, earplugs are definitely an essential for any overnight hospital stay! xx

@sadtoday21 I can kind of see femometer's point as you had a temp drop before O (which I've heard can happen) and then the first rise was still in line with your previous temps but I'm very new to all this. I can't say I agree with the LP stuff at all though as I can't see how it could tell yet.

I had a big temp rise today and stretchier cm so I'm really hopeful it's O. Fingers crossed for the next couple of days!

Glad your op went well @Kelpies hope you have a speedy recovery!

Sounds promising @AnnaMC214 🤞🏻

Welcome @Kelpies and I'm so sorry for your loss and subsequent surgery. Also that you've faced insensitivity from a family member. Xx

Thanks @Amanda81 that allays my concerns a bit! I think the high temp rise today is also a good sign of getting back on track. How is the symptom spotting going - are they getting stronger yet? xxx

@AnnaMC214 that is great news!! Congrats! EWCM was a clear sign for me that O was on the way, let's hope you have a confirmation in the next few days and then on to AF! I know you feel the same way as me, it will be such a relief when the waiting is over and we can get on with ttc soon!

Thanks everyone for the support. The pain have been pretty significant and feels so much like the pain I was in just before I started bleeding last time. I hope I'm wrong but it's hard not to assume the worst. Something just feels wrong in there. It's like I've been wounded or stabbed and I'm wondering if surgery related. I'd go to the GP but I don't think they'll take me seriously. I've had no bleeding so I'll test at the weekend but it's scary because if I'm still not healed it could be another chemical. I was feeling so much more positive but this pain has floored me.

I hope you're all ok! Xx

@sadtoday21 I think a big part of it is knowing where your at. Even though I know it'll be another 2 weeks after O at least I won't be wondering what's going on. Temping really helps with this so thank you for encouraging me to start. I'm hopeful the cm is a good sign but I never seem to get that much unless I'm taking supplements which I'm planning on starting again once I get af.

@Catconfusion I'm so sorry to hear the pain is so bad, it must be very scary. I wonder if it's possible that everything is still just a bit more sensitive. If it doesn't start to feel better soon I think it might be a good idea to talk to your GP. I don't see how they could be dismissive given what you've been through recently. I'm sending you lots of love and hugs. I wish I could do more. xx

Thanks @AnnaMC214 I will go if it carry's on. I have a feeling they'll just say it's my IBS or I'm still healing from the surgery. I just wish there was more follow up after an ERPC. It would no doubt be a wait to see a consultant even if I could get a referral. I wish I could be scanned now to see if there's anything else going on. I'd love to believe it's a new pregnancy and it's implantation but it's hard to be positive. Xx

@Catconfusion I’m really sorry you are feeling this way. I hope the pain subsides and it’s not a signal of anything wrong. Sometimes it’s darkest just before dawn and I’m sure you will have a good outcome soon xxx.

@Catconfusion I couldn't agree more about the lack of follow up. It makes me so angry that they just abandon people. Perhaps I'm missing something but I don't understand why the NHS are so stingy about scans. If you have to make a fuss to be listened to then go for it. Sobbing at them sometimes helps. As @sadtoday21 says, I'm sure everything will turn out ok. xx

Just catching up now and I'm so sorry to hear how you are feeling @Catconfusion. Is the pain constant? I would go to the GP or call 111 if it is too severe. How many dpo do you think you are now? Xx

Thanks @AnnaMC214 and @sadtoday21 it seems to have dulled a bit now. It probably is still healing after surgery but it'd be nice to have some kind of follow up to check everything is ok. Xx

@Amanda81 it's been no worse than last cycle at this point so I don't think anything has changed or got more sinister. I'm 8/9 dpo so still feels a bit early to test despite the early positive last time. Hopefully it'll die down now. Last time it got worse but it might not got that way this time. Xx

I hope it subsides @Catconfusion

News from me today. I went to my midwife appointment and saw a lovely midwife. Unfortunately she's not sticking around she's just covering whilst a new one arrives. Anyway, she started with the usual questions and then she said is this your first...well that set me off! I was very emotional. Thankfully my DH came with me. They both comforted me and she was able to understand how I was feeling with symptom spotting as she has had a MC before. Anyway, I don't know if it was my endless sobbing, but she has booked me in for an early scan next Tuesday. She also said that I might be 5+4 or 5+5 and not 6+1. Which i thought I might be a couple of days out due to the uncertainty of when I O'd and the MC. She also said that she would do bloods to see if I'm in the right range for 5+ weeks. The midwife couldn't get blood out of me, so I was transferred down to the nurses. I am like a pin cushion!!! I really don't give blood easily. Finally got some out of my veins in my right hand.

My symptoms are coming and going, so feel a little down today. But trying to keep positive. It's going to be a long wait until Tuesday!

Hope everyone is doing okay xx

Great news in the EWCM @AnnaMC214 xx

I'm so sorry @Kelpies - I hope you find some comfort from this thread and that your recovery is speedy xx

Sorry @Amanda81 I forgot you had the midwife today. What a lovely lady, to get you in for a scan and do bloods. I hope they continue to use everything at their disposal to reassure you. I know it's so so tough but you're doing so well and you're very nearly out of the riskiest time. When will you get the blood test results? I was told hcg blood tests are not available to monitor the progression of a pregnancy on the nhs. It just shows you what they can do if you see the right person. I really hope this week goes quickly and you get to see that sweet heart beating very soon! Xx

No worries @Catconfusion - I get the results tomorrow. She said she will give me a call as soon as she has them. I'm very nervous at getting them as I can't stop thinking it's all going wrong. Thankfully my DH understands my irrational behaviour. It was weird how she offered me a scan and blood tests...I was very surprised. I was going to ask for them, but didn't have to. We are in Wales, so it might be different here as the welsh government make the nhs policies. I did say that my symptoms are coming and going, so perhaps that's what swung it. I'm just happy and perhaps lucky to be offered them as it will give me an indication either way xx

@Amanda81 it's completely understandable why you feel this way. Great DH is with you and understands.

The bloods and scan should be standard after miscarriage. It's great if it's a Welsh government thing but everyone in the UK should have access to the same. It's probably depends on where you live and your ccg. Its so important to know as soon as possible if things are progressing for the mental health of the mother.

I do have a good feeling about this pregnancy. Symptoms can be so changeable and confusing. I'm so pleased the midwife will call and let you know tomorrow. Xx

@Amanda81 I'm so glad you had a lovely midwife who was understanding. It's not surprising that you got emotional and I'm just glad that she's doing all she can to bring you some comfort. I'm sending you lots of luck for the blood results and I hope that and the scan can put your mind at rest a bit. xx

I totally agree @Catconfusion - I did read today that one of the reasons for early scans is due to multiple miscarriages. I am just so surprised that with mental health being such a hot topic recently that more isn't done for women going through MC or pregnancy after MC. Apparently other European countries do many scans before the 12 wk scan. I have an appointment with the gp next week and i will be asking for some therapy either group therapy or one on one, as so far I am not dealing with this well (also asking for hay fever solutions). I'm very fragile at moment. Xx

Thanks @AnnaMC214 - I hope you get a confirmed O very soon xx

@Amanda81 I'm so sorry you feel like this. I wonder if it's post traumatic stress to some extent. You've been through so much. It's like getting in a car after having an accident. I hope you're feelings are honoured and you get some therapy. Also solutions for hay fever! Xx

@Amanda81 I'm so glad to hear that you had a great midwife visit today and that you are being offered the blood tests and scans. As I am not native to the UK, it was also quite shocking to me at first that there are no scans until 12 weeks. That's really unheard of in a lot of countries - women seem to get scans from 6 weeks on quite regularly. But on the other hand it is free and I do love the NHS. I had the best treatment possible for my mmc and it was a huge relief not to come home to bills afterwards!

I'm really sorry you are having this anxiety right now. It's very very understandable with what you have been through. Please do let us know when you get the test results tomorrow - I have everything crossed for you that the numbers are going in the right direction! We are all here to talk anytime. I know you feel fragile now, but from all of your comments I really feel that you are strong and you can get through this. Sending hugs!

@Catconfusion agree that 8/9 dpo isn't really too early to test - though I always try to hold out until 10 dpo! An frer could likely pick it up now if you did want to test, just to give you a bit of peace of mind. I know how hard the wait is - we weren't even allowed to try this cycle but I am still symptom spotting nonetheless! Every tiny twinge makes me think pregnancy, even though I know it's nearly impossible. It's hard not to think about, no matter how hard one tries to forget. I really hope this cycle brings good news for you!

Hey ladies how are we all today?

So the good news is the nasty cramps have subsided now. I'm still feeling nauseous in the morning but generally a lot better.

The bad news is I caved and tested this morning, mainly because the symptoms have been so strong. It was a bfn.

I do feel a bit like a crazy person for feeling so pregnant yet getting a negative test. I will test again on Saturday to make sure as I guess it could be too early, especially if I'm only 9 dpo. Although my test last cycle was positive at that point. We have the doctors tomorrow afternoon to discuss DHs sperm analysis. We're seeing a male doctor so I might push for the cd 3 hormone blood test. Male doctors are sometimes good with gynae stuff so we'll see! Xx

@Catconfusion great news that the cramps have lessened! I'm so sorry about the bfn, that must have been really tough to see. Was it an frer test? It is still early days though, as you say, so definitely try again in a few days - maybe 12 dpo? Good luck with the test results tomorrow, fingers crossed everything is normal! xxx

@Amanda81 do you have the test results back yet? When is the scan? I hope all is well!

@AnnaMC214 any luck yet on the temping to signal O?

How is everyone else doing today?

My final (I hope!) testing kit came today from CX. It says I have to post one more urine sample back in two weeks. I really hope that one is clear and then we can move on with ttc. I am 7 dpo today and (im)patiently waiting for AF. I've also felt a bit worried - and like a crazy person! - for thinking I could be pregnant again, just because I'm really tired and hungry and have some boob twinges (my only signs the last two times). These could all be AF related though or even just work/stress/illness related. We did end up dtd (with protection) a few times right around O, entirely by accident, but I think we were pretty careful and there is very little chance (although still a small chance?) of pregnancy. I'm not sure whether I am hoping for this or dreading it, since I really just want to be cleared by CX first and not delay it again. Hopefully AF will come within the next ten days.

Hey @sadtoday21 yes an FRER. I guess it could be the pains were implantation so I will repeat at the weekend. Symptoms can be so cruel. I'm starting to think they're phantom in my case. It was so strange seeing a blank test and feeling like this.

I'd say if you were careful it would be a very slim chance anything went wrong. It might be worth doing a test in a few days just to check. Good news about the final test. You must be so pleased! I hope it's completely clear so you can start next cycle. It's looking like we might be cycle buddies if mine is a bit more prompt next time! Xx

@Catconfusion I'm so glad to hear that the pain is better but I'm sorry about the bfn. That's so weird given all the symptoms you've been having. Definitely test again in a few days as it's still early and every pregnancy is different.

@sadtoday21 I'm so happy for you that the end is nearly in sight with CX. Lots of luck for the final results. How long after you send the sample do you usually hear something? Thanks for asking about my O. My temp was still up this morning so I'm feeling quite positive that this is it! Just one more day to confirm it.

@Amanda81 I hope you're ok. Thinking of you xx

Good Afternoon all!

Great news for your final test @sadtoday21, fingers crossed you get the all clear shortly

Sorry it's disappointing @Catconfusion, fingers crossed for another test in a few days' time

Glad you had a good MW appointment @Amanda81, fantastic you can have an early scan.

Bit up and down here, still getting the odd wave of sadness/frustration and just had a nail appointment sat next to the owner with her 3 month old who was chatting to a woman having a C-section tomorrow.

Had a bit of a surprise with AF arriving on Monday (was expecting it to take another week). Am trying to look at it as a positive, it's finally the end of the shitty WTF cycle, I can relax and enjoy the wedding this weekend and I can start temping properly from the the beginning this time.