First Pregnancy Missed Miscarriage

[sadtoday21]

Hi ladies! Our last thread was automatically closed because we reached the 1,000 post limit. I was hoping we would be able to start a new thread called First Pregnancy Post-MMC, but unfortunately we are not quite there yet. I know we will be someday soon! In the meantime, I hope you will all join me on here as we continue on this journey together. You have all been an invaluable source of inspiration, support, and kindness for me and I want to thank you for making me feel less alone in this.

About me, for any newcomers: First MMC in February at 12 weeks (baby passed at nine), D&C the next day, found out five weeks later that it was a partial molar pregnancy and currently undergoing follow-up with CX. Second early mc in April. Now impatiently waiting to be cleared from CX before ttc again.

@3204ECL I think due to my long luteal phase it's a long time waiting for me if I wait to miss a period. Testing on Friday should give reasonably reliable results so I'm going to go from there. I'm going to stop temping now as well. A test is the only way to be sure. Xx

@Catconfusion do you remember what day you tested last time? I looked back and last time I got my positive at 3 weeks and 4 days post o. It will be 3 weeks post o tomorrow for me so Friday feels sensible. X

@3204ECL I got my positive at 9 dpo Friday will be 11 dpo. I feel prepared for either outcome. It just feels right to start the weekend having a better idea of what's going on hopefully. Xx

@Catconfusion totally agree. Luckily I have a busy week as I'm away for a couple of days so should hopefully go nice and quickly! I also feel ready for both outcomes but just want to know what's going on. X

@Catconfusion sorry I meant post AF not post o before 🤦🏽‍♀️

@3204ECL ok I read it as that. Good that you're busy this week. It's the best way to relieve the anticipation. It will play out how it will play out. There's not much we can do apart from look after ourselves and be ok with the outcome no matter what. I need to fill my week up too! Xx

@Indiekid82 totally have the same. I do various forms of exercise 5-7 times a week and cannot lose the weight. DH is very fit and he keeps telling me I’m ‘not doing enough’ it really p*sses me off!

Getting very excited for you all and FX for lots of BFPs

Morning ladies, just wanted to chip in on the not losing weight after erpc...I gained 7 lbs and can't shift it. My bbs haven't shrunk back to size either.

Thanks @zoomies1 I hope so too.

@Amanda81 @Indiekid82 half a stone seems to be a magic number for weight gain. Losing pregnancy weight is a thing people talk about a lot but what if there's no baby!? No one talks about miscarriage weight gain. I think it probably comes off with time if there's not another pregnancy.

Good morning ladies, I woke up today to sharp stabbing pains in my back and stomach. I'm hoping nothing untoward is going on but definitely worse than period pains. It's died down a bit now. I'm just hoping if doesn't mean the end of a potential pregnancy. There's no bleeding but I'm not feeling as nauseous. I guess it's a waiting game now. Xx

Hey @Catconfusion - sorry you've woken up with pains. Tbh I had exactly the same thing this time round, I had really painful stabbing pains from approx 9dpo and I had assumed that it was AF coming back after the natural MC...just assumed that's what it was going to be. I remember standing in a garden centre and having to get support from a shelf whilst the pain subsided. I also got mild backache. Don't consider anything bad (says she who is always considers the worst is to happen), don't worry and get yourself to Friday so that you can test and then know either way.

I had a really awful (very vivid) dream this morning. I was walking around my everyday, doing things I would usually do, and I was talking to my DH and said 'don't say hi then'. He looked completely taken a back. (This is where it gets gross). I was referring to a fetus which was laid inside my pants which I had MC but hadn't come to terms with. God knows how he could see in my nickers whilst we was in the garden...but the imagery was so real. I woke up (thinking that I had woke up) and I took my temp and it was 36.10 which would be O territory for me. Then I actually woke up, and for a split second I thought all of that was real. I took my temp (for real) and it was 36.90 (this is high for me). Needless to say, I have put the thermometer away in a different room as that was the last time testing today. Sorry to share, but god my mind is being very cruel to me.

Hope all of you are okay xx

Thanks for sharing that @Amanda81 It really helped. I'm probably overreacting. I feel nauseous again now I've got up. Last time I had those pains from when I ovulated and they got worse until the loss. If there is a pregnancy it generally feels better. I'm not getting the bad vibes I did last time. I feel ready for it. I might test on Saturday now as DH wants to be there.

Wow that is a vivid one. Sounds like an anxiety dream. Poor you, that must have been distressing. You're right the mind can be cruel.

Temping can be a double-edged sword: it gives such valuable information, allows an element of control but it can feel a bit like living on the edge. It might be a good idea to stop if you feel ready to.

It's such a personal choice but I've stopped temping now. I just want to remember this cycle as a promising one and not go through the emotion of temp fluctuations until I can test. Xx

I think I may need to relinquish a bit of control @Catconfusion and give myself over to it and take on the attitude 'hope for the best'.

Just rethinking me sharing that dream. I hope it doesn't upset anybody, wasn't intending too xx

@Amanda81 no not at all. This is a safe space to share worries. We all want to support you through this difficult stage. Dreams can be really upsetting! Xx

Hi ladies, I hope you don't mind me posting so late in the thread. I've had a crappy night and reading the thread has helped me call down.
I had a mc at 11wks in December. We told family over Christmas because they would have guessed if I wasn't drinking anyway. When we had the mc all family were informed.

At the scan they noticed one of my ovaries was tennis ball sized and I had an operation a few weeks ago to cut out what they thought was a cyst. It wasn't what they thought it was and the op was unsuccessful.

I'm being operated on today and my ovary will be removed. A family member called me last night to wish me luck with my op and to tell me they were having a baby and had had their 12wk scan today. Obviously I'm happy for them but they knew how emotional i was about this op already and i feel so low now. It feels like everyone around me has easily fallen pregnant with no issues-as I had presumed I would be.

Sorry that was so long! I just feel so angry.

@Amanda81 what a horrid dream, I always get really vivid horrible dreams in pregnancy, it’s not pleasant

Got everyone crossed for you @Catconfusion and @3204ECL!

Another one here carrying that extra half a stone my pelvic floor is also being a bit rubbish, don’t know if it was the pregnancy or the op but going to the trampoline park last week was interesting!

Sorry for your loss @Kelpies, your family member sounds insensitive at best, go ahead and vent all your anger, I’ve had a lot, the whole thing is just so unfair!

@Catconfusion sorry to hear you're having pains. After everything you've been through I know it's hard not to worry about every twinge. Perhaps it's the bean getting good and bedded in. xx

@Amanda81 that dream sounds extremely unnerving! I agree with @Catconfusion that it sounds very anxiety driven. Perhaps stopping the temping now is a good thing but I can imagine how hard it must be to just wait for what will be. Please don't worry about telling us stuff. We're all here to support you in any way we can. xx

I'm sorry @Kelpies for everything you've been through. I'm glad this thread has brought you a little comfort at this difficult time. I think we've all had people be insensitive like your family member. If they haven't experienced anything similar people find it very hard to understand and act accordingly. That's why it's so great to have the lovely ladies on here to talk to. Sending you hugs and lots of luck for your op today. xx

@Catconfusion how are you feeling now? I won't say 'don't worry' because you will worry and that's completely understandable. Take it easy today.

@Amanada81 wow! that was an interesting one. I agree with @Catconfusion about anxiety. It's mad isn't it. I normally love a vivid dream - I think when I was ovulating last month I dreamt that Gerard Butler kidnapped me because he wanted to be with me

@Kelpies good luck today! I hope everything goes OK. Your family member sounds incredibly insensitive. No wonder you had a bad night.

I still have no idea what's going on with my cycle. My app tells me I am not fertile but I think the lack of AF is confusing it. I thought I would go back to OPKs and CB sticks just randomly but they are getting darker and I got a flashing face last night so let's see how this goes. DH is away from Monday next week so lets hope it happens before then!

@Kelpies I'm so glad you've found comfort in posting on here, especially during such a hard time. This thread and these ladies have helped picked me up through my darkest days and I do feel that giving myself time to grieve and process it all has been invaluable to helping me move forwards. We're all here for you to talk to and hope that you feel safe to share your experiences.

Wishing you the best of luck for today and sending lots of positivity and love your way xxx

@Amanda81 so sorry you had such a vivid dream! I imagine it was your subconscious worry coming through about the new pregnancy. I know it's easier said than done, but I really have a good feeling about this one for you and I hope you can try to stay positive and not give in to the anxiety of it all. Thinking of you xxx.

@Kelpies I'm so sorry for your loss and that you have to have another surgery on top of it as well! That must be so painful and difficult right now. I don't think your family member was very sensitive about the whole thing and you have every reason to feel upset. Please reach out on here if you need any additional support as you go through this difficult time.

@Catconfusion I hope the pains subside soon and that you have good results this weekend! As others have said, it's not a sign that anything is wrong per se. I never had any cramping or pain with either of my mcs - so you never know! It could be also implantation, maybe? Hoping you don't get AF this month, but it's good you are keeping busy either way.

Good luck to you too @3204ECL, everything crossed for the both of you!

Not much going on over here, on 5 dpo now. My temps have stopped being so erratic and are just gently high. Feel incredibly tired and hungry - which I thought for a minute could be pregnancy signs as that was what I had the first time - but it's probably just a spring cold. Going to try to stop obsessing (strike that) thinking about ttc for a little bit, at least until AF comes.

Thank you so much for your kind messages. The operation went well and I can't wait to move on with my life and ttc again. Some of these people on my ward are lucky i can't move because my god it's noisy!! Who complains about the quality of pillows in a hospital, loudly at 11pm!!

From reading your stories it's clear that you are all such strong women and real inspirations. Our time will come ladies x

Morning everyone! I’m glad you are doing ok @kelpies and wish you a swift recovery!

My Femometer says it thinks I ovulated a day later than FF and also says it suspects a luteal phase defect due to the slow climb. What do you guys think, looking at the chart? Anything strange going on here? I have a large temp rise today.

Hey @sadtoday21 - i get this on mine aswell. I just ignore the advise on the fermometer app as it's useless. Xx