Recurrent Miscarriage Support thread 13 - tests, treatment, trying again

[bakingtins]

Welcome everyone! A thread for anyone who has experienced recurrent miscarriages and is in need of information, companionship, tea and sympathy. Newbies welcome to join at any stage.

Start with the traditional recap please......

Welcome barelita, your story reads just like mine... except you are younger
Good luck with it all. x

Flen you're a genius. You wrote what I feel. I feel abit like I know a famous person right now!

Echo that, great words flen, today I am 7,8 & 10 but now I know I am not 7,8 & 10 on my own

just that's great news! Brilliant.

cloud the counselling sounds good. I can totally relate to the wondering whether to even try again. I hope you get a decent consultant to talk things through with, and tbat it helps you both come to a decision. It's so hard..x

flen oh dear..not easy. My little sister became pregnant a couple of weeks after me..that turned into my 1st mc. I think it would have been harder if I had had 3mc at that point, but it did get easier in some ways as time went on. I agree that honesty is the best policy, and hope you are able to get your feelings heard.

Welcome new people, so sorry you find yourselves here. I will try and say something more constructive tomorrow...

Flen- amazing words from your blog. I've had a similar experience from my sister, but the opposite way round with my first and only successful pregnancy when my sister was going unsuccessfully through IVF, which subsequently failed. I dreaded telling her I was pregnant and for the whole of my pregnancy we didn't refer to it and I didn't post anything on Facebook in respect to her. It was pretty tough for both of us in different ways and tested our relationship but it has ultimately made us stronger.I hope

Sorry posted before I finished!

Flen- I hope your sister shows the same sensitivity towards you x

Hello newbies. This baby/mc/ivf stuff is a minefield. If I do manage to produce off spring after such a long slog I don't think I could resist a bit of fbing, even knowing how tough it can be for some. I don't think it is particularly fair or realistic to expect others to contain their joy in respect of my pain. It doesn't stop it sucking any less tho.
Feeling marginally more hopeful today. I feel generally crapper than I have done. Not necessarily feeling more pregnant, just crapper and it could easily be down to the cold I have picked up. Roll on Wednesday and the scan, at least I will know either way.

But Belle it's funny that I am happy to see updates from people who had difficulties finally getting there... The updates I resent are from people who piss on the bloody stick and think that is it, a baby is coming...

Tiny "piss on the bloody stick" made me lol!

Flen your blog is so moving I've had to do it in chunks rather than all in one go...

Just Belle and everyone in early stages, have some hugs. Such a tenter hooks time x

I've had another (imaginary) drop in movement, but TIAP.

Tanny - just a sleepy day for baby Tan. But understand why you're worrying. (Hug) back.

Tiny I have joined the May 2015 antenatal thread as I wanted to do something optimistic to balance against the gloom but it's a different world! Everyone's at just 12 weeks but all the talk is of nappy brands, bed nests and birthing choices. 2 people have their beans' names down at nursery already. I am sure I was just as confident with dd but now it seems so alien. I don't really resent it though - just feel like some cynical old aunt that is disconnected from my peers.

I created an April 2015 miscarriage survivors group and didnt join the main group until after a good 12w scan... a good small group there...

Names down for nursery at 12 weeks is bloody organised if nothing else. Good god! Even with DS before all the mc's, I was aware of all the potential problems, and always anxious. Maybe a personality thing. It just seems so bizarre now, that people seem to be so naive. Good that you've popped on there longest, hopefully it will balance viewpoints out a bit.

Yes, it doesn't help that my edd is the very last day in May so I am one of the only ones still in 1st trimester. But in some ways it's nice to think, actually, I could have a baby in May! I was even given a picture on Wed. Like normal people get. I can feel some of the tension release, which has got to be good, but I can't help but think it means it's going to be even harder to fall.

just, boozle, bythesea, girliesaints, tanny I am so, so glad you enjoyed (is enjoyed the right word?!) my blog. It really means a lot to know that some of those experiences are shared ones.

And hugs to everybody today.

girliesaints thank you for sharing your experience with your sister. As the shock has subsided a bit, I am beginning to be able to appreciate that this can't be easy for her either. After all, she is not getting the big rush of positivity from her family that she usually would, because everyone is also aware of what I am going through. I did write her an email to explain how I feel, and also to reassure her that any of my possible future unusual behaviour is nothing to do with her! I hope she can understand.

just think (as I do each day) - this is the furthest you've been other than with DD... this is the furthest...

I do know any fall now would be really really hard and I am really trying not to think of it, but I do try and think positively TIAP

Yes, I am not quite at the stage when I discovered my mmc, but gestation was only about 6 weeks so I am almost twice as far along in reality.

Flen. If your email was as beautifully written as your blog then your dsis will understand perfectly.

Flen your blog is incredibly moving. Thanks for sharing. I am 8/9/10 mostly (and nearly cried in the lunchroom when reading!)

longest and Bristolian thank you, and OH MY GOD EVERYONE IS BEING SO LOVELY!

Flen- wow! Tis all xx

Ditto about the blog flen. Very eloquently put and All rings true with me. And how strange that you blogged about that same article about telling people only a few days before I mentioned it!

dildoos xx

March I know! That's why it was so fresh in my mind... And thankyou for lovely comments.

PS. march (and others... ) I haven't had an appt for the rmc yet, it's just over two weeks since I had my D&C and almost three since I was last in the EPU. Should I chase do you think?

Flen- I would chase, although my appointment isn't until the new year,I got my appointment letter within a week of my GP referral. Best to check its not been missed x

I agree with girlie, chase it in case it's got lost in the system. My appointment letter came through quite quickly. If there's a long wait, you could call up and request to be put on the cancellations list. That's what I did and got an appt a month earlier. I think a lot of people fall pregnant whilst waiting so long for appts, so a good chance of moving up the list if it's anything like ours.

girlie and march thank you, I will. Think it will take a bit of tracking down as the hospital who did the D&C said they would make the referral (rmc is in a different but "sister" hospital...). Plus need to get the appointment for the blood tests at the EPU. All so confusing!