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Needles and Neutrophils: The Hobnob Chronicles

999 replies

biscuitsandbandages · 11/05/2014 07:15

Four weeks today I woke in my own bed with my 8 week old daughter in my arms and waited for the inevitable sounds of approaching 4 and 6 year old boys. I had everything I had every dreamed of. Life was difficult and tiring but we were getting there and I had plans for the summer and dreams for our family's future together.

Twelve hours later I was on CCU plugged into a monitor with fluid around my heart secondary to a diagnosis of adult T cell acute lymphoblastic leukaemia. I've not been home since.

Statistically my chances aren't great but statistics don't apply to individuals and leukaemia hasn't met me before. My personal survival statistics calculated by me and based on stubbornness, amazing support from family, friends and my mumsnet backup crew and the healing powers of 3 small children are 100% and I won't accept less.

I have superpowers. I have grown three entire human beings. Piddly little leukaemic cells haven't got a hope.

But.....at times I am very scared. This should not be happening to me. It's was not how I planned to spend my maternity leave. My precious year when I was just going to be their mum and nothing else.

This is my second thread but I'm not going to link back as I'm moving forward. Thank you for moving forward with me.

Biscuits x

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biscuitsandbandages · 18/07/2014 18:52

Over half way through. 5 days of nasty drips with injections either side. Day 4 done. I have felt sick all day. Nothing works. But its just nausea. Just sonething I have to live through..... and I can x

OP posts:
Baddderz · 18/07/2014 18:58

Hi there biscuits.
Still reading your thread.
Just wanted to say hope the heat isn't too much for you and are they cola flavoured chewit's!?
(Cola are the best!)
:)

Goldmandra · 18/07/2014 19:28

Just sonething I have to live through..... and I can x

Smile

You're amazing. Keep it up xx

Mumsfret · 18/07/2014 19:56

Well done crunchy, crumbly one. You've got through another working week of drips. You are a lodestar.

Hope the heat isn't getting to you or adding to the nausea.

You'll soon need to start a new thread! Perhaps one for when this icky chemo phase is A Thing Of The Past?Smile

Keep going strong lady. Stay stale.

LEMmingaround · 18/07/2014 20:00

Chipping in with my support. My lovely friend started her chemo today. I fucking hate cancer

Swex · 18/07/2014 20:11

Phew over half way - amazing job biscuits. Keep it up. X

Mama1980 · 18/07/2014 20:25

Just checking in to say I'm thinking of you.
you're amazing. You can do this you are doing this. X

riskit4abiskit · 18/07/2014 20:38

Hi biscuits, im still reading. So sorry to hear about the sickness side effects. The Kingdom of mumsnet is rooting for you

Heebiejeebie · 18/07/2014 21:16

I don't know how funny you are with eyes. But the best way to put in eye drips is in front of a mirror, pull down your lower lid to make a gutter and then put the drops in there. Blink a bit and voila! Stops the dreadful splash anticipation and blinking the blinkin' stuff out. Feels quite nice.

Sleep well and feel strong.

Heebiejeebie · 18/07/2014 21:19

Are you allowed steroids for the nausea? If ondansetron isn't working then steroids might, if they're not contraindicated for you.

IwishIwasmoreorganised · 18/07/2014 22:10

Sorry I've not been here for a few days.

I'm a bit behind but can see that you're doing a fantastic job of cracking on with this extra hardcore stuff ready to get into remission and start the process of getting back to full strength and health.

You're awesome and doing fantastically well. Keep at it.

Xxx

biscuitsandbandages · 18/07/2014 22:37

Hi and thanks everyone.
Feeling a bit better now the drugs are done for thr day and its almost time for bed.

Day 5 tomorrow.
Im getting there with the eye drops with a combination of the mirror method and closing my eyes when my courage fails me (im such a wuss).
I will ask them about steroid but I suspect its ptobably not a long enough chemo course. I only have 2 more days of drips thankfully. Its violent but thankfully short this regime!!

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Howaboutthisone · 18/07/2014 22:44

Wuss is most definitely not a word that springs to mind when thinking of you you brave lady!

Just a quick one as I'm off to sleep but I have to say that I cannot stop thinking about how awesome you are! You are an amazing woman and those evil cells don't stand a chance when faced with the might of you!

Big hugs x

saffronwblue · 19/07/2014 01:42

Wuss? hardly! You showed up for this treatment, tore yourself away from your family and walked through that hospital door, knowing it was going to be crappy and terrifying. You're a bloody hero!

magimedi · 19/07/2014 08:47

The least 'wussy' person I have ever come across is you, Biscuits.

Hooray for only 2 more days.

biscuitsandbandages · 19/07/2014 15:01

Second to last days chemo is flowing in to my tired veins.

Leukaemia fucking sucks.

Lots of photos from kiddies at home. They will come in tomorrow but im not really well enough for them to come both weekend days... its not fait on them if I cant put on a brave face.

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Fairyfellowsmasterstroke · 19/07/2014 15:13

Biscuits - your posts really humble me.

You are having the worst time ever but are showing such resolve and determination - I hope you realise that you've got the support and best wishes of everyone on MN.

How is Mr Biscuits coping??

It must be hard on him with 3 young children to care for.

Are you getting practical help from family/friends??

If not, I'm willing to bet that if you put out an SOS on here people would respond. Shopping/chauffeuring/practical help. I'm willing to bet there'd be a queue of MNers willing to give an hour or two.

Thanks Thanks

ajandjjmum · 19/07/2014 17:21

Remember what Fairy says Biscuits - if Mr. Biscuits needs some support, there would be a queue!

Hopefully today's session is over, and the baddies are being well and truly zapped.

Hope you have some lovely time with the DC tomorrow - adding some more photos to the pile!

x

Aethelfleda · 19/07/2014 18:30

So so near to the end of this phase Biscuits, give yourself credit for pushing on through. Thanks

Hope you get lots of cuddles from the Petri dishes tomorrow and enjoy your time together. Maybe make paper dolls/paper aeroplanes with the big ones, that's easy and fun without being too draining?

Howaboutthisone · 19/07/2014 18:36

You're nearly at the end of this bit now biscuits. Well done on being so amazing!

I hope you have a brilliant time with the little uns tomorrow- you bloody deserve to!

Swex · 19/07/2014 22:50

Not long to go now and the chemo will be done. Hang in there

HypodeemicNerdle · 19/07/2014 22:54

Last day tomorrow and visits with your lovely trio? Sounds like a good day.

Leukaemia most defiantly fucking sucks, think of all those nasty little cells suffering and dying from your super chemo.

What day are we on in the countdown to baby R's half birthday? 27?

One more day of chemo then we can dust off our pom-poms and start cheering on those neutrophils

Howaboutthisone · 20/07/2014 22:50

Was today the last day?!
And did you have an amazing day with your beautiful children?

Mumsfret · 21/07/2014 09:38

Sun is shining (in the Mid Shires anyway!). A new week, biscuits. And hopefully one that is laden with some positive & encouraging news after what you've just been through Smile

Legionofboom · 21/07/2014 09:43

Hi Biscuits. I hope you were able to enjoy some time with your family over the weekend.

Hopefully you are now able to start recovering from this last bout of chemo.

Wishing you well Thanks