Re: DS is transgender ftm 16 and happy.

[crazyhat]

In reference to the suspended thread titled "DS is transgender ftm 16 and happy." I am the 16 year old, writing it from my mother's point of view, everything I said is true, and my mother and I stand by what I said. See, a few weeks ago she told me that when I first started transitioning, she came to mumsnet for help, and was met by people telling her to not endorse it, and other things that (with hindsight) are blatently transphobic. You are all free to your own opinions, I can't stop that. But I genuinely can't describe the feeling I have towards my body, it's such an extreme disconnect, and I know that transitioning is genuinely the only solution. I am very greatful that my parents support me, unlike many parents, evidently are on here. I'm sorry to anyone who feels decieved, but I was genuinely just doing it to have a sense of understanding of what my parents generation think, and to be brutally honest, it was borderline concerning. I feel sorry for people who's have to hear "advice" from some of you. However I, and my situation, is very much real.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/lgbt_children/3732775-DS-is-transgender-ftm-16-and-happy

why won't you accept that 16 year olds are NOT simply allowed to make any medical decision they like. None of us are.

Of course we all are. Whether we can find a Dr to do it is a different matter but if we can then of course we can make any medical decision we like.

What can't we decide?

Are TAATs allowed on MN now then? Perhaps the rules have changed

Exactly

Age of consent for what?

Any irreversible life decision

Struggling to think of anything that isn’t already banned. I suppose non medical sterilisation for anything other than “I’m trans” isn’t technically against the law (not sure of the age. 18?) but it’s effectively against the law as it would be near impossible to find anyone to do it and parents wouldn’t be cheerleaded along if they took their teen daughter for a full hysterectomy.

I think 25 is fair enough for sterilisation tbh.

I tried to get a breast reduction when I was about 22 and it was refused. I was pissed off at the time but in hindsight it was a good decision. I could probably have got it done if I’d pushed harder and shopped around but its not really on the same scale in terms of “life changing”

I don’t think educational path or borrowings are “life changing” so much as “life”. Every choice to make shuts something else down, that’s part of life.

I don’t agree with young people being sent into active combat, but then, I don’t agree with active combat at all. All those millions sent out to slaughter - they were just lads. I’m not going to say I think that’s ok.

The word women refers to an adult human female. The child isn't adult but will nevertheless always be female. It's an observable fact.

The word cis refers to having a gender identity to match the expectation of society based on your sex, it's not an observable fact, it's a feeling that some people have and others don't. Personally I observe that most people present as having a none binary gender identity, bust since it's a feeling thing, I won't impose that interpretation on others.

Because human beings are never disemodied female sexual organs but human beings are women 51% of the time, and 100% of the time if they're female - regardless of any unreal ideas they might carry around with them.

everyone here is concerned you are making a decision that will be severely detrimental to your health.

As a middle aged woman with a wide range of life experiences to fall back on, if I announced a life changing decision and was met with as much consternation and concern as shown here, I would definitely pause for thought and ask questions and whys - not just barrel on blindly. That's maturity and the grace to accept I don't know it all, even if I thought I did.

I can accept I get things wrong, and thank those people who have no skin in the game but to potentially help a fellow human avoid a mistake

Different procedures require different levels of understanding and brain development.

The law doesn't reflect that though. What other age limits would you propose?

Are TAATs allowed on MN now then? Perhaps the rules have changed

Well FWR has its own stringent rules that no other threads have to adhere to

Maybe special rules apply here, only in reverse...

If young people believe this innate gender sense is biological and real... don't they wonder where all the middle aged women who felt like this years ago but didn't get to transition are now??

Because these women don't seem to exist. We don't have numbers of middle aged women saying I knew I was a man I wish I'd been allowed to transition at 17. Why not?? Where are the middle aged women who were denied this?

In fact we have the opposite. We have middle aged women saying I understand how you feel and I'm so relieved I didn't get to transition.

If trans is real and not a cultural phenomenon, these women in the wrong bodies should be here reflecting that from 30years show... they are not. Why not??

What does that tell us?

MIdgebabe

That doesn't matter. Why does it simply have to be pointed out to a dysphoric teenager? Do you think telling the op that they're a woman like the rest of us is going to make them have a sudden epiphany?

If you won't at least respect someone's request to not call them something you can't be that surprised when they choose not to respect your request to do the same can you?

There was absolutely no need for that poster to add in the bit about being a woman. It was entirely superfluous. They were asking not to be called c*s. It didn't need any comment about the op added in for good measure did it?

So very true @buzzshitbagbobbly

In other news: there was something on Radio 4 the other day about the recent dramatic increase in narcissism. Apparently it actually has 'protective' qualities in that it stops those with that particular personality disorder from experiencing the sometimes crippling self doubt the rest of us may suffer from.

If trans is real and not a cultural phenomenon, these women in the wrong bodies should be here reflecting that from 30years show... they are not. Why not??

But we do have a lot of middle aged men transing.

But we do have a lot of middle aged men transing.

A lot of middle aged men wanting to parody and bastardise womanhood while demanding access to female spaces.
Not really a wonder is it?

@Whatwouldbigfatfannydo

And in the context that it was used it was necessary because?

If this was a person with anorexia posting and you were asking them not to call you something you'd feel compelled to tag something about their weight onto that would you, just because it's a biological fact?

Why?

Please know that you can come back here whenever you want. Even after you’ve made changes to your body. People will be here to support you even though they may not be able to validate your choices.

Please know that you can come back here whenever you want. Even after you’ve made changes to your body. People will be here to support you even though they may not be able to validate your choices.

In the way that they've been supportive on this thread do you mean?

Hearhooves
It is interesting that you’ve brought up anorexia. I’ve read newspaper articles calling the wave of girls diagnosed with gender dysphoria as the new anorexia.

Anorexia is something to be treated. With this in mind, can you not see why so many posters are concerned about this child?

I’ve been supportive

Mummyoflittledragon

I didn't bring up anorexia

BabyItsAWildWorld

I don't know where the middle aged women are. How do we know they aren't transing? Does anyone keep records of the numbers?

But to say that most people change their minds in adulthood belies that numbers of men are transing so, if you forced teenage boys to desist how many of them would still trans later on?

Without all of the figures I can't see how you can draw the conclusions that you are.

Plus, the op is an individual. Does it matter to them how many people desist or change their minds? If they know it's the right decision and their drs agree then really what qualifies you to know better?

They think they know it's the right descison, it's not the same as being the right descison.

There's another thread running where the op is a NB lesbian and who is being given just as hard a time as the op is here. Which is interesting because they aren't having hormone treatment or surgery yet that still isn't good enough apparently for many of the posters.

The objection appears to be that the op isn't embracing being female and this seems to be the crux of the matter here too. Posters seem to be very offended by the fact that people won't wholeheartedly embrace being a woman. This seems to strike at the very heart of feminism.