Re: DS is transgender ftm 16 and happy.

[crazyhat]

In reference to the suspended thread titled "DS is transgender ftm 16 and happy." I am the 16 year old, writing it from my mother's point of view, everything I said is true, and my mother and I stand by what I said. See, a few weeks ago she told me that when I first started transitioning, she came to mumsnet for help, and was met by people telling her to not endorse it, and other things that (with hindsight) are blatently transphobic. You are all free to your own opinions, I can't stop that. But I genuinely can't describe the feeling I have towards my body, it's such an extreme disconnect, and I know that transitioning is genuinely the only solution. I am very greatful that my parents support me, unlike many parents, evidently are on here. I'm sorry to anyone who feels decieved, but I was genuinely just doing it to have a sense of understanding of what my parents generation think, and to be brutally honest, it was borderline concerning. I feel sorry for people who's have to hear "advice" from some of you. However I, and my situation, is very much real.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/lgbt_children/3732775-DS-is-transgender-ftm-16-and-happy

Then you read other threads where someone is doing exactly what the op here is being implored to do - accepting their sex, but living how they want and that's not right either. Apparently they don't feel female enough for many posters (????) and are basically negatively affecting all women by being themselves

Can you link to such a thread because I have honestly never seen anything like this and I have been on here for years.

But that's exactly what the whole gender discussions are about...trying to bottom out what we as a whole can acknowldge is negatively and unnecessarily affecting someone else , and when someone might be unreasonable in complaining that they are negatively affected. Just because someone thinks something is offensive, we shouldn't immediately ban it. The offsenc taken has to be reasonable.

Usually as a society, we come to an agreement which tends to be on the back of measurable and observable external impacts.

So for many women, the whole construct of gender identity is negatively affecting them. We can explain this, we can show how for example the gender assumption that women don't make good scientists harms both women and uk science.

As a compromise position, many women are prepared to accept that some people have a strong feeling of gender identity that is really important to them. And they will respect it to a point. The point tends to be breached if the harm to the woman is not recognised. Typically when ones personal space and dignity is being invaded.

Hearhoovesthinkzebras
You can't understand the arguments because you've forgotten that Mumsnet is not a hive mind. You (and the OP) are hearing the views of countless women with a variety of ages, experiences, lesbian, straight, different ethnicities and so on
We all approach issues from our own perspectives and as has been highlighted, we grow in our understanding as we listen to each other and contrasting / opposing views. This isn't a #nodebate forum. Precisely the opposite.

The one commonality between this and the other thread that you have highlighted is countless older women demonstrating concern for the welfare of vulnerable young women and alarm and outrage at how poorly they are served by an oppressive and regressive ideology that is both misogynistic and lesbophobic in so many aspects.

Can you link to such a thread because I have honestly never seen anything like this and I have been on here for years.

I have, just above

Because I can't understand the arguments. They appear to change with every given situation, sometimes directly opposing each other.

hearhoovesthinkzebras, people's views will change with every given situation because real life is not neat and there are so many competing factors at play.

Before I had children, I had certain views as to how I would raise them 'I will never do x', but then I real life you realise that there might actually be good reasons for doing x after all. I don't know what your background is, but I find that the more life experience a person has, the less they're likely to blindly stick to absolutes. It's just not practical.

I also agree with a previous poster that you seem to think of MN as a hive mind - sure, you are interacting with a screen, but you're not the only one here (despite the high number of posts in your name!) - we're all individual humans logged on separately living our own lives. You've been making many assumptions as to how 'everyone thinks' about certain medical issues when you have nothing on which to base these assumptions.

My concerns about mid-life transitioning men are entirely different to my concerns about teenage girls transitioning. I don't see what is hard to understand about there being different arguments in different situations.
I think the issue with non-binary as a gender identity is that we are all non-binary so no one really understands what it entails.

Hello everyone. As it's looking unlikely that the OP will return - and because we are getting a large number of reports in, we're closing this thread to new posts, as we did with the previous thread.