FET Sept/Oct

[Lolly2803]

Hi ladies,
I am due to start an FET in Sept/Oct and wondered if anyone else was too?! Had my first cycle of IVF in August but due to fluid in my uterus and thin lining had to freeze everything. I seem to always have fluid mid cycle, including natural cycles. Very worried that it will always be a problem and will never get to use my embryos. Having a hysteroscopy the week after next to check incase anything in there but doc suspects not. Would be great to have a few buddies! xxx

Lolly xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Oh no Lolly 😟

Lolly I’m so very sorry - I have been there many times, and know the disappointment of an uncooperative lining. There are many different strategies to try - I don’t know why they’d say there’s nothing else they can do for you, you and your Dr may need to tinker with different approaches to try and find the right formula, and think outside the box a little. My Dr says some women don’t respond well to artificial oestrogen, but do respond when they have their body’s own oestrogen in the mix as well. So it could be that light ovarian stimulation (i.e. to grow one or two follicles to produce natural oestrogen) plus prohynova and / or oestrogen patches, could be a better combo for your body. Viagra pessaries can also really help many women. A mixture of different kinds of oestrogen can be useful - patches and vaginal administration can be more effective than oral progynova. The neupogen wash might nudge you over the line to the magic 7mm. Big hugs - it’s so hard. I feel like everyone else seems to find a FET a doddle, it seems everyone else grows lush plump linings really effortlessly - whereas for me just getting to a transfer is a huge mountain to scale, let alone getting a BFP.

Again cautious and hopeful congratulations - and likewise to CSA

(are we ALL Londoners - albeit I’m the lone one north of the river?!)

bear excellent news on the scratch - TICK

AFM, sadly my birthday came and went with no period - my first cycle of HRT plus the copper IUD post hysto has been a total washout

We agreed it was too early to write anything off yet after just one month, and we've added in oestrogen patches for this month on top of the HRT. But we agreed that if we've still not been able to generate a bleed in 6 months time - via whatever combination of drugs we end up trying - that if it's not happened by then, we would have to accept that it's not going to happen.

If we get to that point, it's very unlikely we would try another FET - because if we can't get a decent enough lining to have a bleed, it's not going to be able to propagate and sustain a pregnancy, and it would be folly to waste our precious embryos.

If we do get me to have withdrawal bleeds then we would do a dummy FET with endometrial biopsies and crack on. But if not, then that's it for my body.

So no FET for me any time in the foreseeable future. Or potentially at all.

Ironically the waiting has been the killer to date. Now I’m terrified the next 6 months will fly by - with no progress - and we’ll have reached the end of the road. By spring latest we will know if there's a chance my uterus is potentially up to the job. Or that it definitely isn't, and that our only chance of having a baby is to transfer into someone else's 😓

Thanks for your message Banana. You're right it's so frustrating! Especially as the fluid wasn't there last week - feel like I was tricked into getting my hopes up and then smacked back down to reality. They think the rise in my oestrogen levels causes the fluid which then prevents the lining from thickening (or doesn't help it). It was there for IVF stimulation and it's there in my own natural cycles. The lining this time is thicker than I saw it on my IVF cycle and I was on high dose of Gonal F at that point. The viagra pesseries is an option perhaps, I'll mention that to her if this gets us nowhere. She said the fluid was very rare which obviously made me feel very special! I'm going back on Thurs for another wash and for them to check. She drained the fluid this time as well so maybe it won't come back?! Who knows! She did say we could just go to ET and see what happens. We've never done one before...i just feel so sad and disappointed. Didn't help when the woman on the train behind me this morning was on the phone talking to her family about finding out she was pregnant. Felt sad at the thought that probably will never be me....
Sorry to ramble on. Banana I know you more than anyone have been through all of this x a million. It's bloody hard though!! Sorry the first month didn't go well but I think the plan you've made is a really good one and I think having a time frame helps too so mentally. With all your fantastic Frosties I so hope the next couple of months bring what you so deserve. I can't get my head around how life could be so cruel so I can only think it will happen for you .
xxxx

Hi Banana and Lolly

Can't even imagine what you are both going through. What an absolute nightmare. I don't have anything helpful to add, but I am thinking of you both

xx

You ladies are so strong - to have all the setbacks you've had and keep going is incredible! I know I've only just joined but I read through the whole thread like a weird internet stalker

I'm very conscious that my IVF journey only began quite recently and so far I've had it really easy compared to some of you - and even then I've been completely freaking out/driving myself bananas. You guys are amazing x

I may sound strong but I can assure you I'm not. I sobbed uncontrollably last night and have been like a zombie at work today trying not to cry.

It's good to cry Lolly. Let it all out and don't be ashamed.

I cry all the time since losing my son and desperately wanting to be pregnant again. It just makes the IVF I did earlier in the year a totally waste of time, energy, and money. I totally get it! The crying is uncontrollable and it won't stop any time soon so let it out. Are you more angry or sad (or both)? My counsellor says it's okay to be angry if it helps you process your emotions, just know that the feeling of anger will pass. Eventually. We are all here for you xx

You too Bear and Banana! Big hugs to you both.

Csa don't feel guilty for getting pregnant. That's what IVF is for. Watch your little bump grow and enjoy every minute of it :)

I'm just a little bit emotional you guys! Watching Pride of Britain Awards with all those courageous people and children doesn't bloody help! I'm in bits!

Oh guys - big hugs to you all!!

Lolly - I know it seems wretched but it's not over til it's over, the treatments might do the trick and you have to keep on believing for now or it will drive you crazy. Of course you're allowed to be upset, it's a bloody gruelling awful journey.

Again - any more peeing on sticks? Hope you're holding out ok.

I'm absolutely shattered today, stupid clocks going back at the weekend. Will probably be existing on coffee which isn't the best but I'll go cold turkey again when AF shows up next week.

xx

I know you're right it just feels a bit hopeless at the moment and my Dr wasn't exactly forthcoming with ideas on things to try!
Will be interesting to see if the Neupogen wash I had on Monday will have done anything...I'm due to have another tomorrow.
I'm not sure if they'll give that a couple of days and then start me on progesterone ready for a transfer next week. I think I'm going to try a transfer if the fluid stays away and my lining doesn't decrease. Never tried it so feel like it's worth a shot. Not sure whether to go for one or two. Have read two increases chances and they can help each other. But then worried that thin lining wouldn't be ok for two even if they did implant. I've no idea!! Just feeling a bit zombie like this week!

How's everyone else doing? xxx

I guess if there's no fluid and the lining is looking ok it's worth a try. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Just looked back to early posts and you have 5 embryos? You could argue that if you wait for conditions to be perfect they may just sit in the freezer, whereas you just never know and one or even 2 might take!

Obviously I'm not a doctor - ha ha.

Are you drinking your beetroot juice? Might not do anything but always worth a try. I drank so much last month that it looked like I was peeing blood

I'm impatiently waiting for AF so I can do this natural cycle. I was chatting to the doc about our one remaining embryo and she was saying that no one has an early blastocyst transfer anymore really, unless they are chucked in with other embryos as part of a double fresh transfer. They would either freeze it on day 6 or discard it. So I could be looking at a perfect potential day 6 blast or a crappy one that would be binned. But keeping up the PMA (for now). Helped by the odd glass of wine. xx

Yer exactly - I think perfect conditions aren't going to happen! So I think we do just need to pop something in and try!! Just not sure how many! I have 3 day 5 and 2 day 6. Are you saying Day 6 ones are better?

Are you going to pop 2 back this cycle?

I've been drinking pomegranate juice, acupuncture, aspirin, warm water bottle, no dairy (apparently it's a mucus producing food group) no pork and only lean meat and fish. Massively cut back on sugar/basically cut it out.

Just want to wake up tomorrow afternoon so I can find out what's going on. Can't concentrate at work and don't really give a shit about it at the moment!! xx

So statistics say that day 5 and day 6 transfers are roughly the same in terms of success. But early blasts frozen on day 5, you don't know if they have the potential to get to that stage or not as they have been frozen before they have the chance. Day 6 wasn't really a thing back in 2013, because culture mediums have improved. We just have one early day 5 blast to try now. So if it doesn't survive the thaw we won't be having a transfer.

Your clinic will let you know which ones they rate the highest out of yours, they might not be bothered whether it is a day 5/6 and may use them in different combinations.

I haven't given a shit about work for months now. I was supposed to be going on maternity leave last week - boo.

Sounds like you're doing all the right things, way more than me. I have terrible willpower and try to cut all those things out but end up just cutting down and hoping for the best.

Stay strong xx

I'm doing it because it's been recommended but realistically is a glass of milk going to decide if I'm pregnant or not - it seems unlikely! I've done all that and still had what's happened so.......

I'm not sure what they'll recommend i put back - I'll be asking them of course!!! xxx

With my DD I did literally nothing different, other than knocking the booze and strong coffee on the head. It's only been this year that I had even heard of these things. Our clinic actually recommend drinking a litre of milk per day during a fresh cycle to keep protein levels up, so it's so confusing.

Yeah just be guided by them. If you don't mind risking twins of course! The idea of twins freaked me out so much back in the day, but I've literally spent all this year being an emotional wreck about the prospect of DD being an only child, and going through eleventy billion treatments so in retrospect, there is definitely something to be said for twins, despite the risks. All the twins I know came from straightforward healthy pregnancies and these cases are definitely in the majority xxx

So it's more of a Chinese medicine thing the no diary - they are said to be mucus producing foods so thought that might help the fluid. (Clearly it didn't). Have been keeping my protein up though.
I think it's basically down to science and luck but as that's out of our control we seek a bit of peace through having some control over helping the process along and so that's why we do these things! Or maybe it's just me!

The prospect of twins doesn't scare me. In fact I'd welcome it with open arms. I'd love it! I just don't know what's best for the lining...or whether that even makes a difference! xxx

It's so annoying that if you do get a BFP you never know what was the key, what made a difference and what didn't. Ultimately it is a competent embryo and competent lining! But just because you have had fluid at stages, doesn't mean your lining will be incompetent - if it's gone, it's a clean slate. I'm sure there must be people who have natural pregnancies who have had fluid and it's gone again, and they never have any way of knowing or caring about it.

If I were you, I probably would go for 2. You don't want to go through all this bullshit again in 2 years. One of my friends who has recently had twins said that regardless of if it was one or two babies, this would be her only pregnancy. She's done daily clexane injections the whole way through, plus various immune infusions. It's cost mega bucks, so at least the twins means it was somewhat of a BOGOF

Yer I know what you mean. I guess it's just my lining isn't thick enough either. It's only 6.1mm and if the Neupogen doesn't work it'll stay that way! 6.1mm isn't optimum thickness so the chances of success are lower. Would these increase with putting 2 in? Does a thin lining mean 2 wouldn't work as well as 1 might? I don't know. I'm going to ask these questions tomorrow.

I'm sure Banana would be more helpful than me! If it was 6.1 and the wash worked and the fluid stays away, you've been on the hormones for more time so it should have thickened up a bit. I'm sure they won't let you waste your embies if it's a no hope. If it's a lining issue then neither embryo would likely take but if lining is ok then it would all depend on embryo quality and I guess putting 2 back would increase the chance of pregnancy. Will be thinking of you! Keep us posted xx

I've run out of HPTs and I'm too embarrassed to buy any more. The staff at Boots must think I'm mad by now.

I keep getting very faint lines like the pic attached. It's almost invisible. So I'm going to try my hardest to not test till Saturday (OTD). I've filled my diary for Thursday and Friday so that I'm not alone and tempted to walk down to the shops to buy more tests!

Can't believe I only had ET last week. Feels like 6 months ago by now!

Oooh! Can't be the trigger by now surely? FC for you!! xx

Again that's clearer than the one you showed me! Try and hold off till Sat and hopefully that second pink line will be so bright you'll need sunglasses!!
xxxxx

Thanks guys! This is what my chem pregnancy looked like too so I'm a little worried and don't want to get my hopes up. Roll on OTD! xx

I caved. I literally have no willpower. I poas about an hour ago and it came back absolutely 100% stark white naked nothingness. I think praying to god that it's because it was my third wee in less than two hours (had been drinking lots of water) and it was in the evening. But part of me has given up hope. I'm having on/off period like cramps, am I getting my period? I didn't think you could while taking cyclogest?

Aw again! I would say test in the morning FMU and then see. It won't be accurate anyway from what you've said. But either way it's still too early to be sure even tomorrow morning!
I didn't think you could get your period while on cyclogest but I'm not certain. Maybe the cramping is a good sign?

Don't give up hope yet, it's still very early xx