A thread for those of us who just want to tell each other things about our day

[LikeMyHeartIsAboutToStopBeating]

Prompted by a discussion on another thread, this is a safe and supportive place to share those small and inconsequential things you'd probably tell your partner but aren't big enough to warrant calling your friend, starting a new thread here or discussing with your therapist. It's for those of us who don't have someone we can talk to in that way - maybe we are newly (or long term) single, we have a partner who isn't willing or able to have those conversations, we have teenage children who grunt but aren't that interested, or we just want to hang out here.

No rules, apart from be nice. Nothing too small to share if sharing will make you feel more connected to people or you just want somewhere to offload about small problems/share something funny/have a "would you believe it" anecdote. I can't guarantee to be here all the time but will try and make a habit of checking in.

I'll start by saying that I went to Screwfix to pick up a plunger because the toilet keeps blocking (my life is whatever is the opposite of glamorous) and there was a couple there trying to buy something but struggling because they didn't speak great English. The guy behind the counter asked them where they were from (he had a proper Cockney accent) and when they said France, he started speaking French to them. Not the best French (my mother is French, I'm not fluent but I know enough to distinguish good French from bad) but enough to help them figure out what they needed. Then the woman on the next still said (in French) that she did French at school and wished she still remembered more of it, and I said it was funny to hear people speaking French in a Screwfix in East London, and suddenly the world felt like a very friendly place. I came home with a new tape measure but realised I didn't ever get round to buying the plunger, so I will have to go back tomorrow.

@Nogodsnomasters I spent a lot of today at the hospital. She is away with the fairies most of the time. She was telling me that she was at work in the hospital and that two people just got engaged and there was a party as it is Saturday. She said she stayed with her mum last night which is why she did not come home.
The good news is that the CT scan was clear, the doctor who I spoke to is sure that everything, including cognitive decline, is down to an infection. They are struggling to find exactly what and are continuing to do tests.She had an x-ray this morning and will have an ultrasound scan of her kidneys soon.
I’m feeling positive as the medical staff seem sure she will recover and get back to how she was a few months ago.

Aw John this is so sad, you must feel very stressed out. I'm glad they're treating her for an infection even though they aren't sure where it is. Antibiotics are probably the best course of action for her. Bless you both x

I've decided I'm going to have a good day today (oh god please don't be a jinx! 🙈 That's anxiety talking).

I'm taking my kids to the forest today to find and collect conkers. I'm also going to Primark, DFD (dear foster daughter) needs new long sleeve tops. I need to stop off at the post office too.

Can I join? Sending lots of thoughts to all of you going through a rough time.

We have some health issues in the immediate family (DD anorexia and DH degenerative disease). Children on half term and I have massive work projects with deadline Thursday. Children are playing computer games and I am feeling like such a bad mum.

yesterday I was in tears to a staff health support (anonymous), spiralling, not taking my own heart medication, almost punish myself for not being able to cope.

Today I have taken my medication and my son is going to a friend’s house (girls still watching tv). Hoping for a better day

Thank you, yes it feels like an achievement. I was on them for 18 years at the highest dose. When I was still depressed the doctor started adding other medication and I thought is this my life getting more and more medicated. It was a very bumpy wean for the second half and I almost gave up a good few times. I’m so happy to be out the other side. So far so good. I have herbs from a medical herbalist. The GP was absolutely no help at all. Looking back there were days when a Valium would have been very useful but I never felt I could ask. During the year long wean I visited the doctor only 4 times and all I got was a prescription to go back on Effexor XR.

Glad to have found this, can I add in a regular whinge here and there?

My life is a mingled mess of anxiety, daily (and now very annoying) IBS symptoms and perimenopause shit and with my part time caring job, also caring for my mum who has Alzheimer's and breast cancer, helping my teens navigate life and living with a crazy, reactive rescue dog my life can be quite frazzling at times and I don't think dh or my friends always wants to hear about my daily ramblings about it all, they all have their own crap to deal with.

So if anyone wants to hear about my day every now and then i'd happily exchange that for a listening ear (or keyboard!).

Everyone welcome here, all whinges gently listened to!

Well my blast from the past didn’t respond again, I suspect it’s because I told them I’ve been happily with DP for 3 years now.

Today I’ve felt things intensely. High physical anxiety and overwhelm for most of the day. I know my threshold and I think I’m near capacity. It’s unsurprising with what I’ve got on but I’m recognising it today more than usual.

So I’ve just had a long shower with posh toiletries and had a big old cry. My PJs have been warming on the radio and I’ll crawl into bed soon. Tomorrow will be better.

I've cricked my neck overnight by sleeping funny. It really hurts and I'm on the sofa with a hot water bottle on it.

There's no one to tell it to here as DC are with stbxh for the first half of half term and i didn't tell anyone at work as doing some project work where no one cares.

I don't mind too much that I'm not being looked after but it's only just occurred to me that only i know that I'm in pain.

We all now know that you are in pain. You are no longer alone as we all share your pain and we all want it to end for you

Hope you managed to get some sleep using the hot water bottle. A cricked neck is so painful.

Good morning everyone, hope you managed some sleep.

i was up working until after midnight but my 11 year old, who’d been left alone all day waited up for me so she could snuggle up in made with me and go to sleep hugging me. It made we want to cry (not sure grateful for her love or sad that I am letting her down).

have booked three hours off work today to take children to a place to do some crafts at lunch. I ended up turning down. Work meeting because of it an my anxiety is off the charts. I am about to go downstairs and start working again, may treat myself to a posh coffee from cafe round the corner after the first hour and get some fresh air into my little one.

I hope you managed to have and enjoy your posh coffee! You're doing the absolute opposite of letting your 11 year old down, btw - you sound like a wonderful mum. X

Today was a bit surreal.I went to visit my wife in hospital.I’d been there talking to her for about half and hour when she asked me what my name was. I said that I was John. She replied, “My husband is called John, are you married?”. I replied “Yes, I’m married to you” and she then said, “Well give me a kiss then”.
I’m sure when she recovers we will laugh a lot together when I tell her these tales. (It seems that a UTI can cause a lot of confusion in the elderly but the antibiotics must work soon)

May you both enjoy a good chuckle over that very soon! I do wish your wife all the very best for a good recovery. Recently, a 93 year old friend suddenly seemed to lose her memory and become disoriented. She was in and out of hospital a few times but is now back home , bright as a button again and the doctors said that was an infection. Fingers crossed the same for your wife @OldJohn

Running for the bus on the way home tonight: dark, late, cold, tough day…. was still a good way from the bus stop so was running as fast as I could. I could see the bus stop at the bus stop, nobody was waiting though… bus driver was waiting for me 😃✨

@mechanicalpencil Thanks for your support. It helped me a lot to hear about someone who has recovered

@Resisterance - that's the worst feeling. I had a prolonged period of pain like that last year. Went away when I finally bought a Groove pillow which is a shaped memory foam pillow. It's incredibly supportive and comfortable. Really transformed my sleeping!

My mum had this in the summer she was a totally different person for a period of time time combative unkind and not at all my mum she's back now in many ways since her stroke she's changed but she always cares and would never he unkind.

Thank you @Enoughwiththisshit . I ended up not having my coffee but am thinking of sending my oldest out to buy one for me today. I worked until 1.30 last night, again… but hoping today is the last day of this.

John, hopefully you will laugh one day. It must be beyond strange at the moment though. My husband has bad days and I feel my heart sink those days.

i hope we all can have a gentle day today. More small things such as kind bus drivers and good quality sleep / food.

i managed to cancel a meeting this afternoon, just trying to get through this day.

@OldJohn how are you and your wife getting on?

@NewspaperChips Thanks for asking. She was a lot better yesterday. She was managing to walk to the toilet with her Zimmer and a lot of help. She is still a bit confused and still thinks her mother is still alive, she died 25 years ago.
I'm doing a few odd jobs around the house to make it easier when she gets home.

Morning everyone. @OldJohn glad to hear you're seeing improvements in your wife, hopefully it won't be much longer until she's back to her old self that you know and love.

What are everyone's Saturday plans? I've been off/on awake from 5am as usual with bad anxiety. Only me and my foster daughter are awake at the moment, husband and son are still snoozing. I have an appointment to get my eyebrows done at 11am which I booked as a treat for myself but then always struggle to face going to these things 🙄

I’ve enjoyed reading everything on this thread, makes me feel a bit less lonely. My 2 daughters live away with their families, one I see a couple of times a month the other less as she’s abroad. They’re so busy though and I’d never really be honest about how I feel because tbh I genuinely don’t know half of the time!

most days I feel lethargic, tired, joyless and without purpose. I semi retired in May and I thought that would give me a new life, but it hasn’t - I feel rudderless but even as I type that it looks ridiculous, so privileged!

had the flu recently and am still coughing and knackered from that. Plus dh working away so I’ve got no one to talk to.

just feel overwhelmed and deflated and like I don’t know who I am anymore!

what a bloody pity fest lol

@Nogodsnomasters I know exactly what you mean about not wanting to go to appointments. I was the same with the hairdressers for years, I used to dread actually going. Luckily I found a local salon that was warm and friendly with lovely stylists so I almost look forward to it. I realise now I’m 60 it was my anxiety all these years.

@Queeezy my DC live away too. Only about 60 miles but because they are so busy with work and partners I don’t see as much of them as I’d like to. I did manage lunch with my DS this week as we went on a shopping trip to the city he lives in. I really miss them. I envy people who have DC living locally and can pop round for coffee etc.
I retired last year and it was great for the first year but like you I began to feel a bit lost and rudderless. I went through a phase of not being able to see the point of things. I have started volunteering one morning a week in a local historical garden and I’ve got an interview on Monday for a volunteer position in the county library so hope that will go ok. I am feeling a bit better about it I think but I do miss my job and the mental stimulation and interaction with colleagues.

Today, DH and I are going for coffee and food shopping then I have to visit my mother and see what she’s lost or broken today and sort that out.

Sorry, long post.