No hate please ! Why do depressed people not go outside ?

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Sorry if it upsets anyone , I am just very curious as why depressed people don’t want to go outside ? I know someone who has depression and she doesn’t want to go outside at all no shopping (only online shopping )no hairdresser no nothing , can someone explain to me what’s stopping them ? It’s no hate question at all I’m just trying to understand better and educate my self better . Thank you millions xxx

Because the world is outside and it can be a bit much if you're feeling awful.

Outside is scary and full of people. Hey may be mean. Inside is safe, secure and controlled.

overwhelming
unpredictable
too many steps to make it happen

Because outside requires you wear clean clothes, brush your hair and have a basic level of self hygiene and all of that feels too much when you can barely feed yourself.

For me it’s the fact that I literally can’t do anything at all. I can’t get up, washed dressed never mind open the door and function. I live a normal life with work kids etc but when this hits me I completely breakdown. I also have adhd so that impacts me. Luckily, this level
of depression Only happens me about twice a year. The adhd meltdowns are more frequent.

it’s obviously different for every who’s suffering with depression but I was so bad after the birth of my son I didn’t leave the house for 3 months.

What numerical said. Some depressive episodes mean you are curled up in duvet mode and can barely move/get out of bed, let alone get out of the house, your energy levels are depleted, self-care out the window and the obvious things; sleep, nutrition and exercise seem out of reach.
I do hope you are not being disingenuous posting - if it was as simple as "go outside", do you really not think most people would?

For me I just dont feel like moving. I will go get groceries as my DC lives with me so I have to feed her. But I rarely go out unless I have to. Plus I've gained a lot of weight and medical condition that makes me unattractive so I hate being in public.

Can you really not think of any reasons why someone suffering from depression doesn’t want to go shopping or to the hairdresser? Like you can’t figure it out at all? You needed to ask mumsnet ‘what’s stopping them?’

I agree with pretty much everything written here.

Inside is safe. Basically, it’s the hole I have crawled into, and pulled in behind me.

One of the defining features of depression is lack of energy, physical and emotional. Utter, dread, bone-deep inertia.
The slightest thing takes super-human effort.
Imagine picking a mug up to make a cup of tea, barely worthy of a thought, easy peasy lemon squeezy, hardly even notice it.
Now imagine your muscles are made of cooked spaghetti, aren't really attached to your arms and the message from your brain to your muscle doesn't ever quite leave the station... Now pick the mug up.
It's a serious illness but you look just the same as you ever did.
If depression looked how it felt, it would look like melted liquorice.

There is no motivation, everything is pointless, you want to get off the world and curl up. Extremely difficult to feign interest in anything because you have zero desire to look outwards. You can sometimes feel that as you look at your house and the mess piling up I wish it was tidy but still can't summon the energy or will to do it and this is repeated in getting up, cleaning teeth etc etc No amount of attempting to override this ennui will work, unless just maybe you are supremely resilient and have been round this block on many previous occasions and can get yourself out of it. On a brighter note it is possible one way or another and if you are lucky then you will still have friends once things are better, though friends often give up as they get pushed away. Supporting a friend with depression is difficult but hang on in there.

This.

Plus a panic attack at home is more easily controlled and less scary than having a panic attack in a supermarket full of people.

When you are depressed everything is too much effort. That includes eating, showering or even leaving your bed. Its exhausting just breathing.

Actually, OP, just learn about depression from Anna Mann. Here you go.

Our eldest researched as depression is a side effect (too) of major surgery. The theory is that it's protective as it makes you hole up and get better/keep away from additional danger. So if you have depression after injury or illness, it makes sense. But if you have it for other reasons ie less of the evolutionary positivish one, then you're nobbled into not wanting to move.

'Sorry if it upsets anyone' implies you know it might, which makes it goady to ask. Just google.

Or use like a tiny bit of common sense and most semi competent adults could figure out why someone who is unhappy and depressed doesn’t want to go to the hairdressers.

I struggle to find the motivation to move unless forced to .

I'll often live on what's left in the fridge or freezer or toast rather than face the outside.

I do t have a reason to get up , kids left home , live alone so even the thought of leaving the bed is just too much effort. I do the bare necessities, walk dogs, shop when I run out of enough that I have to , the outside does t scare me but it's the effort needed to look remotely presentable that I can't be arsed with . I also sleep a lot . My bed is my favourite place .

For me , I didn't see the point nor did I have the mental energy to get out of bed, I couldn't even pick up the phone to speak , get dressed or shower. I didn't want to see or speak to anyone.
Depression , for me was brutal, I felt I was dead while still breathing and the agony of living this half life meant that some days I could hardly move let alone go outside.

I struggle to believe that you haven’t been able to join the dots through independent thought.

Too many steps to make it happen. You first need to get out of bed, get dressed, brush your hair etc.
When depressed, just one of those steps can feel like climbing a mountain.

@Kanaloa , I don’t know why you have to be mean , it isn’t a joke! Why am I not allowed to ask questions from real people who experience it instead of google websites ?

Go outside? Not a fucking chance. When I have a depressive episode I can barely face getting out of bed, let alone going outside.

If you're looking for logical reasons for your friend's antipathy to going out, you're going to be disappointed. If depression was logical we would be able to logic ourselves out of it. We can't.

Why couldn’t you answer my questions? Can you really not imagine why a depressed person doesn’t visit the hairdressers?

Yes yes yes