Probability of fingering causing pregnancy

[MountainVA]

Please do not shame me, I’m feeling terrible and my mental health is in shambles. Here are the facts before I ask question…..

-40 YO
-2 kids conceived super easy (11 & 13)
-In between birth controls (iud next month)
day 15 of cycle (ovulating according to chart)
-partner and I opted NOT to have intercourse since we knew I am ovulating.

I’m pretty sure some semen was on his fingers when he touched me. we don’t know 100% he says not but I did see him “handle himself a few times” So yes I know yes it’s theoretically a possibility if sperm is near vagina BUT statistically how likely? I’m ready everything from “haha your an idiot it’s impossible” to “that’s how my cousin conceived”.
Im terribly concerned. Loosing sleep and can’t eat. I cannot be pregnant at this time due to mental health concerns and my marriage is failing heading to a divorce. My anxiety is sky high and I’m all over the map from convinced to knowing it’s improbable. Next two weeks will be hell waiting.
Facts that I have come across online.

At 39 my chance of becoming pregnant TRYING is only about 5-6%.
If we had gone as fas as withdrawal (did not just using this as a thought) It’s 4% chance of pregnancy. Adding those two things together gives me odds less than 0, correct?

Going nuts…..

Please help me.

If you cut through all the schoolgirl dross and pearl clutching on this thread...

It is possible but highly unlikely. The only way you'll now know for sure is to do a test as soon as you can and try not to panic in the meantime.

What an odd thread (and title............................................) Wish i hadnt clicked on it........

It never ceases to amaze me how stupid some mumsnetters can be that they have to ask questions like this.

😆🤣

Is this a wind up…

Increased cervical music at point of ovulation is a new one on me.

Did you feel better about yourself after writing that comment? How rude and unnecessary.

Mine likes to play Gilbert and Sullivan.

No chance at 39 take the MAP for peace of mind.

@MountainVA you said you husband said he had no semen on his fingers. Unless he stopped, washed his hands and came back then yes he did. And he knows you had sex this way to not want to get pregnant. I’d have in the back of my mind he knew you were very fertile, he had semen on his fingers and he perhaps would want you pregnant again knowing your beliefs you won’t terminate to trap you into staying in the marriage?

Listen to your voice at ovulation. I could sing higher notes than at any other time!

40yrs old and you're allowing him to 'finger' you?! That's what teenagers do..... (If he just touched your clitoris though, that's not fingering).

Why can't you take the morning after pill if you're that worried?!

What's the sensible word for it now? When is the age cut off? I actually want to know, I had no idea

Perhaps they were engaging teenage role play. There’s nothing like a bit of Grange Hill.

So once you reach 20 you can no longer enjoy a good finer blasting?

It also blocks implantation.

Its progesterone which signals to the body you are already pregnant which cancels egg release and 'hardens' the lining so nothing can implant so you can take it upto 5 days (the time a fertilised eg takes to travel and implant).

If you are already implanted (pregnant) it will just strengthen the pregnancy as progestorone in a pregnant woman reducing the risk of lining breakdown.

Lol this is the first time I’ve heard that fingering is only for certain ages. 😂🤦🏻‍♀️ perhaps your past sex partners were bad at it. Then I could understand this comment. Why does OP need to justify what she enjoys in bed? Personally I am almost 32 and my husband is quite good at it and I enjoy it very much. Should I report to him that we can no longer enjoy this activity now that it’s been reported that’s we cannot enjoy this past the age of 19?

@DaughterofDawn you are an amazing person for providing me all of that information on your own time. I’m just some stranger . Thank you.
NEW TWIST.
Today, CD 17, have blood tinged cervical mucus when wiping. since I track I have had this before on occasion in past few years.
Breasts tender. Am I correct that this cannot be implantation bleeding as it would be too soon? Only two days….
CD 15 I also had slight blood tinged so I honestly have no clue when I’ve ovulated but at this point it doesn’t really change things if sperm can live so long.
many thoughts? It was nearly a full week ago when I started the Egg white CM with headache and such so was convinced that was ovulation 🤷🏻‍♀️
I really just have to work on my anxiety and come to terms with uncertainty.

I would reply but you clearly aren’t being genuine.

Thank you all. I did get to speak to my therapist this morning. This is all an anxiety trap/ loop that I’ve gotten myself into. I crave certainty. I want to know and be in control or I get anxious. Because I can not have 100% certainty I am reaching out for reassurance bc reassurance temporarily reduces the anxiety. I have to be able to live with the uncertainties and complications of life without panicking in this and in all situations.

Also, for those who have anxiety, you know the living hell it can create when your mind convinces you, beyond logic, of impending doom. Often times it’s a totally irrational fear! But the anxious mind cannot yell at the time that it’s irrational or illogical. The feeling is all too familiar and I believe that is the case here.
I’m still scared. I’m still anxious. I have no choice but to wait it out.

I can keep reading comments giving me reassurance (or not) when no one really will know. We don’t know if a meteor could hit, right? Is it possible? Sure? Likely? No

Im trying to stay busy with my kids.

Guess I’ll keep y’all posted in 2 weeks!
💕

Your anxiety is being worsened by your husband lying to you about the state of his hands and claiming you're insane. Anyone would be anxious with a gaslighting prick.

Agreed. I have never seen such a load of sarcastic unhelpful comments to someone who is obviously struggling with their mental health. Some of you should be ashamed

@DaughterofDawn confused. You are the one that helped me with the timing of everything, no?
I don’t understand what is not genuine?

I’m sorry I misread your name and I thought you were another poster. I will read it and reply in a moment. I will be back.

Whew 😅