What would happen if I didn’t collect DS from after school club?

[Confusedandtired21]

Just that really? Due to be collected before 6pm
I feel beyond able to cope with life at the moment. I have Adhd, asd and bipolar. No one can help so that’s that! So if I didn’t collect him what would happen to him. Would children’s services just get involved? I don’t want this for him but I feel like I don’t have much options left. He’s not hard work or anything, he’s a lovely boy which makes this even harder. I just think he’s he would better off in a different situation with someone other than me

cultkid
That’s what I’ve been doing for weeks. Been too long now.

Your son will literally just be happy with you coming to get him, giving him a hug, and as pp said toast or cereal. Either if you think you can, go to bed together and sleep and start making calls tomorrow or, settle him and call Samaritans. Samaritans also have text and email options so you could cut and paste a bit from here.

Keep in posting too. Lots of us here rooting for you.

Who looked after DS while you where in hospital? Can they not help again?

Go and get a drive thru, eat it in bed if needs be. If your son is too young too get in his pyjamas himself or clean his teeth, let him sleep in his uniform and don’t clean his teeth, don’t worry about anything if it’s all beyond you tonight, it’s not important! Xx

I'm so sorry you're feeling so desperate that you're considering this. I really hope you can get the support you need.

@confusedandtired that's part of the ADHD, you have days where normal life just seems insurmountable. Are you medicated? I'm not, and on days like the one u describe, I just take off from work, sit under a duvet, binge Netflix, eat and do the bare minimum I can. U need to take care of yourself, in whatever way helps you the most.

Let him wear the same uniform tomorrow. Give him a snacky tea straight out the cupboard/toaster/freezer/microwave. Do what you need to to make your life simple enough that you can get through it for now. Look at his little face and know that you are loved so much and you are being the total opposite of selfish every day by getting through it despite how impossible it feels. Kids need so little really, but they need you to be there. Someone else might be able to do x. y or z but what he wants is his mum, the person who has known him since the day he was born and will always want the best for him. You're that person!!

Just take the pressure off yourself a bit and know that you can't be perfect mum right now, only 'good enough' mum and that's ok. It doesn't matter if the house is a mess, it doesn't matter if tea is junk food, it doesn't matter if he wears the same clothes tomorrow. But please believe that he desperately needs you.

I can order the kids takeaway yet again like I have done for weeks 😭 I’m just failing as a parent

Did you collect your son OP?

Namechangernumber1 I was medicated until Friday but my Adhd clinic (dr tint) has closed without notice, so unmedicated now, but never mind!

I wish I was close to help you OP. Please reach out for help. Family neighbours friends school anyone??

Asked the gp for help after my Adhd clinic closed , he’s referred me to the nhs Adhd clinic but it’s at least a year wait, so have to deal with life how it is for now. And I can’t

No there is no one to help. Both my sisters have their own issues right now, both of their kids have asd and other mental health issues they’re dealing with and one has an unexpected pregnancy. So no

Did you pick up OP?

I can order the kids takeaway yet again like I have done for weeks 😭 I’m just failing as a parent

You’re feeding them when you’re struggling, that’s not failing. OP did you collect your boy?

How old is your son?

You can self refer for help and its opn till 9.
www.gmmh.nhs.uk/referral-services
www.gmmh.nhs.uk/assessment-service/

Ah OP I’m thinking of you. You can do this - just take it an hour at a time, takeaway or sandwich and put on the TV. Well done on speaking to school. Can you ask to see someone at school - the head or head of year - tomorrow to speak to them about how you’re feeling? Often school can help hurry up help and support from children’s services. Don’t be afraid of reaching out as many times as it takes. Forget your auntie - your boy loves you and no matter what he loves you and needs you. You are a good person and deserve help. Sending you all good thoughts and wishes xxxxx

And yes I collected him after school rang me x

There is also this.. www.bekindtomymind.co.uk/who-can-you-speak-to/
I think it'd worth giving one of them a ring

foxgoosefinch thank you so much, that post means a lot

I have spoke to school. I’ve been in regular contact with the senco/safeguarding person, she’s contacted children’s services (who aren’t interested as no safeguarding concerns) and also my mental health team which prompted them to come out today . So school have helped

Takeaways are still food- you’re feeding your kids and taking your little boy to nursery. The fact that you’re worried about not being good enough shows that you are; you’re just struggling right now.

Would it help if someone came and helped to clean- just to get you over this particularly difficult period? x

Sorry to hear you’re struggling op, can anyone/organisation help you with respite care for your son? Just until you get stable? Xxxx

Just nothing seems to help so I’m still here feeling the same. Which is ridiculous I know. I’m just tired of it all. Got stuff with my 15 year old and trying to get him an ehcp and taking hi to cbt therapy at camhs etc (he’s autistic too) and then things to sort with my 10 year old and I’m just not the person to do it. I just feel like walking away and never coming back or just ending everything so I never have to think of it again (can’t get this of my mind ) which I know is so selfish and self centred but it’s the only way I can see out if it. Then someone else can deal with it all better than I can. And they would! Without a doubt! And I can’t stop thinking that I gave my kids my problems genetically. If I knew then what I know now I would never have had them, which sounds horrible doesn’t it. I just know they’ll end up like me. God help them

There’s no one that will help me to clean. I’m usually the one that helps others to clean! lol. Seems ridiculous how