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Andes up - who needs a rock to lean on? Rock on over here!

966 replies

ThatVikRinA22 · 19/03/2013 15:27

in honour of ed and her mountain ranges.....Smile

welcome to thread 3 - this is a support thread for anyone needing a hand to hold while they get through depression or any other mental health problems - long term or temporary. All are welcome.

linky to old thread

OP posts:
SnowyMouse · 23/04/2013 18:00

I haven't been doing day hospital, they couldn't make up their mind. I've spent the week trying to reorganise and get some tasks done that needed doing (e.g. hair cut on Thursday, will look slightly less unkempt).

UA, I'm glad you at least have an appointment, must be difficult to wait :(

ColouringInQueen · 23/04/2013 18:01

aaargh too busy mn-ing... put saus on to cook 10 mins ago. Put lid on frying pan Confused. They have managed to de-skin themselves in the main and now look, well, less appetising Wink

SnowyMouse · 23/04/2013 18:07

Oops CiQ! Can sauce help at all?

TheSilveryPussycat · 23/04/2013 18:08

Ha, I left a milkpan on last night and then went upstairs to MN work. It boiled dry and left a black crust all over the inside Blush - soaked it and it looks as though it is rescuable though.

ColouringInQueen · 23/04/2013 18:15

hmm good plan - but less classy - ketchup Wink

SnowyMouse · 23/04/2013 18:29
Grin
TheSilveryPussycat · 23/04/2013 18:32

3 cheers for ketchup!

ThatVikRinA22 · 23/04/2013 18:52

evening
counselling was useful - got 4 sessions i think. Have homework. I need to write down examples of when i have trusted my own judgement and been right. (in or out of work)

DS has been at it again - rang me in a panic. Im going to call him back tonight. He was trying to get an extension on his dissitation - when he tried before it was too early, not they say its too late. He is also deeply offended because the disability team asked him several questions about drugs - so i asked what made them think that?
He says that he is ill with a cold and they said he looked like he had just got up.
They have clearly taken one look at him - i can guarantee that he will have been in un ironed clothing (possible dirty) he will have been unwashed and unshaven, with hair all over (he doesnt get hair cuts until i force him) - ive said until i am blue in the face that people will judge him on his appearance.....maybe now someone else has said something he might wake up and realise he cant wander about looking like a tramp and expect to get a job or people not ask questions or point it out. Confused

so - he picks perfect timing. let the stress begin. again.

Back to work tomorrow - just been speaking to the lovely rep for my area. Ive no idea what in store for the meeting but im trying not to worry about it just yet. She is going to represent me. Something is going on but i cant get to the bottom of it.

Have a cracking head ache. Going to try and relax and will take a sleeping pill tonight.

im thinking whats the worst that can happen. Im alive, im well, and its just a job. Nothing is set in stone. I deserve to be happy and if work isnt making me happy i will change it. no biggie.

ill check back tomorrow - im only doing a short shift. ive found some of my work stuff. ive even braved plugging in my works phone.....im ignoring the buzzing of a million emails.....not even looking.

Right. Off to get some dinner for DD and her beau....and me. if i can get some down....

OP posts:
SnowyMouse · 23/04/2013 18:58

Hugs vicar. Good luck for tomorrow, sleeping tablet sounds like a good idea in preparation. Good outlook, wishing you well for tomorrow, and make sure you eat something.

TheSilveryPussycat · 23/04/2013 19:22

Diability team should know people with AS are often sometimes dishevelled - DF and I both look dishevelled even when we are trying (hence no chance for me of Level 3+ Blush ) - but I suppose they have to ask about drugs anyway.

All best wishes for tomorrow, vicar, and I second snowy on the eating!

Lucyellensmum95 · 23/04/2013 19:38

Sadly this is more of a happy handyman uniform but of course dp looks hot in it he looks hot in everything - you know, hot and sweaty Grin

Lucyellensmum95 · 23/04/2013 19:40

Good luck vicar will be thinking of you x

Catmint · 23/04/2013 20:08

Just checked in to say good luck Vicar, I was thinking of you today.

Lucy, I work for a large volunteering organisation that someone has mentioned. Having a mental health condition is not a bar to volunteering at all. We aim to be diverse and representative of the community. As one in four adults has a mental health problem at some time in their life, I would say that is pretty representative. We also try very hard to be inclusive and obviously not discriminate.

I agree with the other poster that you should be upfront about yourself, so that you can agree a strategy to cope if things get a bit overwhelming in your vol role.

But most people who volunteer report a positive impact on their MH, so it might be worth a try. Good luck!

HellesBelles396 · 23/04/2013 20:14

the five minutes before you go in will be worse than the five minutes after vicar

off work today. lots of crying over my long-dead marriage.

bassetfeet · 23/04/2013 20:17

Evening all
Good to read how much people have achieved today ...and the humour Grin

Vicar Good luck tomorrow . We will all be thinking of you and giving you strength . Sleeping pill excellent idea .........maybe lay out some fruit or a yoghurt to eat first thing, so something light on your tummy if you are churney .
Reread your own words from your post re what is the worst that can happen. It may well be much better than you anticipate Flowers
xx

TheSilveryPussycat · 23/04/2013 22:20

I have just noticed the emoticon for today so I am sending you Dragon Dragon Dragon strength, vicar.

Hoping all the crying was cathartic, helles.

ThatVikRinA22 · 23/04/2013 23:54

i should really be asleep....but im a bit wired.

going to take a zopiclone in a min and try and get to sleep.....just watched game of thrones again....(ive taken to watching each episode twice) so the dragons are very fitting!

and my little rat baby adoptee Pearl has been a darling tonight - not one bite. i didnt want to put her back in her cage.....she must see me as safe now as she ran for my shoulder when she got scared. Smile

so.
tomorrow. 4 hours. just 4 hours of work.
then my lovely pal is coming over for coffee and a natter
when i get home i will walk my pooch
and then cuddle my rat (yes - really - she adores a cuddle!) and i will be fine.
the world is not going to end tomorrow.

good night everyone. will update tomorrow evening. thank you for all the support - you are all invaluable to me. xxx

OP posts:
EdwiniasRevenge · 24/04/2013 01:26

Just popping on to say good luck tomorrow vicar.

You can do this. Its just 4hrs. Then you can come home and let Pearl settle on your shoulder.

I'm done now. Birthday balloons up. Presents wrapped. Hello kitty crocheted.

Kitchen zapped. Lounge zapped. Pretty happy with today actually.

Good luck tomorrow. You will rock!

HellesBelles396 · 24/04/2013 07:00

you don't need luck vicar you were made for the job, it's just a shame you haven't been supported enough to do it.

another disturbed night- asleep but not rested. off again from work but I have a telephone appointment with a counsellor. I have to get past this.

ThatVikRinA22 · 24/04/2013 08:19

Thanks everyone, will be back later.better attempt to get ready.

OP posts:
HellesBelles396 · 24/04/2013 09:39

right. yes I was emotionally abused by my ex husband. yes I was sexually abused by my ex husband. yes I have hidden from that. yes I have made excuses for hum to help me hide from that.

but
yes I was strong and I left him
yes I need to grieve for the way I thought my life had been
yes I have the right to feel like this
yes it is time to get out of bed, get showered (definitely get showered) and accept the past
yes it is time to move on

TheSilveryPussycat · 24/04/2013 10:06

Helles it is a process, how long ago did you leave? As you'll have seen from other posts of mine, my marriage became EA (not sexually abusive tho) and although I am detached from Ex mentally, and v happy, still stuff re-emerges from time to time.

HellesBelles396 · 24/04/2013 10:29

that's what's ridiculous - I left 2002 and divorced 2003. I just hadn't allowed myself to see my marriage for what it was. then, at the counsellors the other day, we were talking about my marriage and she said that he hd raped me and I realised he had and she said he had been intimidating me and I realised he had and I felt so stupid that this had started before we got married but I still married him and stayed with him for three years. and all this time since I've tried to see things from his point of view. how difficult it must have been being married to me, to be living away from ha friends and family (we both were), to be a father again (unplanned). the only thing I ever blamed him for was not paying towards the debts we had - I paid them all off. I even made excuses for him not bothering to see or pay towards ds. I am - no, I have been - such a fool.

TheSilveryPussycat · 24/04/2013 10:40

Helles you said: I am - no, I have been - such a fool.

Good to see you changed the tense to the past. Perhaps it is no shame to be a fool for love?

Your divorce may be long in the past, but these realisations are recent. I have spent most of the last year (divorced Feb 2012, he moved out Aug 2012) re-evaluating my whole life since I met him - some 40 years and more - I didn't start waking up till 2009, then tried again .

Have you tried just writing stuff down as it appears in your head? this can be a sort of brain dump (like MN brain-bleach, a bit!)

ColouringInQueen · 24/04/2013 10:43

Morning everyone. Rooting for vicar here too.

Helles that sounds so tough to come to terms with. But from all your posts on here you do sound like a strong person and you will get through this. But as the v wise SPC says it will take time, try and be patient with yourself. Sending {{hugs}} x