Andes up - who needs a rock to lean on? Rock on over here!

[ThatVikRinA22]

in honour of ed and her mountain ranges.....

welcome to thread 3 - this is a support thread for anyone needing a hand to hold while they get through depression or any other mental health problems - long term or temporary. All are welcome.

linky to old thread

just a quickie....

egg hope you are ok.

basset im back on Weds, but have counselling appt tomorrow. Feeling odd about it now.

i should be sorting my stuff for work but i just cant motivate myself. i need to charge up works phone, (which hasnt been on for 5 months and will proabably combust with the amount of emails i will have to go back to)

i need to charge up my torch.

find my boots. socks. sat nav. and then, find my nerves of steel....

I'm ok.

I will post as a means of 'debriefing' myself. Fairly uneventful tbh. Pretty as predicted

thanks UA

ive just read the latest OH report and feel like banging my head against a wall......

if i dont bite the bullet and go back i dont think i will ever get back. Everyone is just pissing about now and doing nothing. lots of talk about needing this and that, but no one sorting anything.
i hope to god im doing the right thing going back before case conference. Ive been saying for 4 weeks now that im ready to go back, and yet, all the reports state that my sick note is likely to be extended while waiting for meeting, yet HR seem to be waiting for me to get back to organise meeting.
in short it seems this organisation couldnt organise a piss up in a brewery,

ive committed to going back on weds so i will do that. and hope the meeting is still as productive for me. im hoping i dont get stitched up because im back....it was meant to be a meeting to organise how to get me back to work but it will never happen if i dont go back and scream at them....

Its 3am. I need to debrief. So appoligies in not addressing others. I will be back tomorrow later.

Brief summary of this evening.Went to brownies. By the time arrived parents were arriving so would have been unprofessional to discuss issues with 'friend' (I didn't think about that beforehand).

I proceeded to run the main activities and general stuff.
I heard 'Friend' tell the other leader , shall we say Anne, that she needed me to sign something. 'Friend' came over. Gave me the card and the pen and just about managed to ask me to sign.

Everything else 'friend' needed yo do was via Anne. Made even more interesting by the fact that we had an observer in.Came home. Got on with my evening.

When Anne dropped dtd1 off after guides she told me that 'friend' left in tears after being verbally insulted by her dds father. I will find out more about this tomorrow.

Dtd1 has bought home a personal gift from 'friend' as a thankyou for their help in prepping pack holiday when I had neck and bottom problems.

Dd3 is given a personal present for her birthday.

Dtd1 also comes home from guides with a selection of photographs. A couple of these are from brownie/guide events but most are from shared holidays, days and meals out (ie personsl events)...So I'm a bit confused.

I then get a text from 'Betty' who is a friend of the 'friend' saying its about time I appologised. Friend is really upset etc. But it is up to me.

I reply stating that I have sent apologies via a third party and stated that ball is in 'friends' court. I also state that I am in the process of writing a personal apology.

I have spent the last 4hrs finishing the gift I had 90% completed for her dds birthday tomorrow today. I will upload pics later as I am pleased with the outcome despite who it is for..So...I want to apologise. It is the right thing to do.

I think remaining amicable at the very least. Outer circle friends is the right aim. But I do not want yo become dependent on her and I do not want her to become dependent on me. I do not want her to control me. How do I strike tge balance? ??

I'm exhausted - slept really badly.

vicar what does the union rep say about you going back before the case conference?

egg funny it's all through others, almost like she's trying to get sympathy... continue with your plan (it's a sensible one) - don't be manipulated

Hello everyone - I lost this thread for some reason, probably because i have been crap and not posted for over three days.

Just popped to see how things were, especially for Vicar. Wow, back tomorrow - this is good, really, you need to just do it - if you don't you will never know. I believe you will be fine and that you will, after a few dodgy days getting back in the saddle and sorting everying out admin wise, be really good and hopefully enjoy your work - at least that is what i am hoping for you, you deserve that.

I am not doing brilliantly, i NEED to start job searching but have done nothing NOTHING since the easter holidays - feel that i should be doing something but no motivation.

Right I'm getting up.

Its DD3s birthday tomorrow so I need to go and buy balloons. wrap presents. Find birthday card. Finish her birthday crochet.

Waves to all. Thanks for support yesterday. It was a tough day. But do you know what I came out the other end with dignity thanks to the support that the bunch of rocks on here provided. Thanks

My latest crochet creation is on my profile...I think

Up, been out for milk and cigs, now have to tackle complete bombsite that is the kitchen, and make house presentable for old friend visiting tomorrow. This should energise me nicely!

Ed have had a look at pix but unless it's some kind of pokemon I am unable to guess what the creature with the long ears might be

Hi everyone,
good one Egg, hope you get on well with the birthday prep x
vicar hope you get/got on ok with counselling today and I will be thinking of you loads tomorrow.
Helles are you working today? Any chance of a nap?
UA great start to the day
Lucy lovely to hear from you again here, can sympathise re: the job hunting - hard to do under current circs! Any incentives you can use to help motivate you for a couple of hours? Mine tend to involve food which isn't so good but hey...

Stomach finally calming down today hurrah and made it to counselling - plenty more food for thought...

hope you're all enjoying some sun too x

Lucy finding motivation is hard, v hard, for me sometimes. You could assemble everything you need for doing a job search, as a start. Then if the mood takes you, you can seize the moment.

I've made some appointments (including hair, which is about 6 months over due).

I'm trying to at least read some OU info.

Hmm good tip SPC book and notepad to find here...
Hi snowy well done on the appts - I felt a sense of achievement after v long awaited trip to hairdressers!

Sending good productive wishes to all.

Been a pretty unmotivated day today - haven't even thought about jobs really. The pressure is sort of off as DP seems to be really enjoying his new job and they have given him a uniform so they must be serious about keeping him on for a length of time. He said this morning that he is still torn as we are getting clients asking about work but it wouldn't be enough to sustain and he wants to be able to be in a position to advertise so Im happy with that. But we COULD do with more money, will only just manage on his wage - don't get me wrong, just managing feels like the life of riley just now. But i do want something - i have to sort my CV out, am going to email volunteer beareaux see if they have anything for me - I wonder if i should tell them about my anxiety etc because i have had a few things that i have bowed out of because of it.

I have been running around for my mum today, she is poorly (again!) so i took her dog out - to the beach, im not complaining! Then I had to sort some banking and bills out for her. Go to the town, i was starving so i had chips on the beach - was bloody lovely - and of course all that meant i couldnt possibly at home looking for a job!! But at least i don't feel as if i have done nothing all day. I also managed to get DD some tops from the charity shop which is good, her clothes are looking really crap because she insists on keep growing but i don't want to ask DP for money - not because he wont give it to me, he will, but because the thought of spending money makes me feel physically sick. I don't mind if its charity shop buys that feels justified, although i have baulked at buying my own stuff - just can't do it.

I might have a mnet break, im not sure yet because i am spending a lot of time online, but then if im not here i'll find something else probably less healthy to do online and i dont want to go there.

Egg - i hope your DD has a lovely lovely birthday tomorrow and if you are really energised you could come and clean my kitchen for me as i haven't even done yesterday's washing up yet I did have a lovely cream tea though - I felt as sick as a pig afterwards, two huge scones and a cup of tea - bloody lovely.

Colouring in queen - hope you are ok

Vicar - Head up Girl - we are all rooting for you!

Anyone else

Yesterdays washing up? (I still have sundays on the side).

You've done loads lucyellen. Absolutely loads. I will talk through what I have been doing with my therapist which helped get me going. Unfortunately itay not be today as I have to complete a crochet hello kitty and wrap a stack of presents....

High five on the washing up

Am going to look at your crochet - i want to learn

Wow - those are amazing!!! i need to be able to do that - a friend of mine has been doing crochet, i can knit but can't crochet. My DD1 has made some amazing things by knitting and crochet, she has stopped now but she has made some stunning things - she made some of those mushroom things too, then gave them out to all the guys at paintball, they wear them in their helmets if they score - she calls them 1UPs after mario brothers. She doesn't get time to do it anymore though shes working lucky cow

How's it going for everyone? level 2 here.

Just googled Stich and it seems I wasn't all that far out

Lucy as the pressure is kind of off I would go for the volunteering - I got back to work twice through this route. Disclose for the volunteering, and then be very firm with yourself if, at some point in the future, you are due to volunteer but don't feel up to it. If that happens, ring and cancel. The CAB were v v v understanding that I had to do this on occasion when I was a volunteer.

Time to think about disclosure when you feel more able to work - you seem to have enough on your plate atm if you can get away without.

Now, the important question - does DP look hot in his uniform?

SPC re: uniform question. Brill crochet too. Creative stuff is good isn't it?
Lucy please answer SPC You've got loads done and I am v re: chips on the beach. Interesting you're thinking about volunteering - I am wondering about that later this year - feels a more feasible route back into work and still gives me time to paint and do school runs...
UA good for you. Time to put feet up (if they're not up already ;)
Hello to everyone else - can't quite remember everyone!

Enjoying a thoroughly sunny day here

apol if I've overdone it on the s - I blame the sun x