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Andes up - who needs a rock to lean on? Rock on over here!

966 replies

ThatVikRinA22 · 19/03/2013 15:27

in honour of ed and her mountain ranges.....Smile

welcome to thread 3 - this is a support thread for anyone needing a hand to hold while they get through depression or any other mental health problems - long term or temporary. All are welcome.

linky to old thread

OP posts:
ThatVikRinA22 · 19/04/2013 23:34

well.
i am going to be wittering on here for a few days until i get things sorted.

i have a counselling appt on tuesday.
and i am back to work mid week. no idea what is happening re meeting or if im being disciplined or if i need representation.

i so wish i had just kept quiet.
on the plus side i can have a pedicure. verrucas have gone.
im trying to find a silver lining....

will have another job hunt tomorrow.

OP posts:
EggwiniasRevenge · 20/04/2013 00:12

Witter away. That's what this thread is here for.

Got up at 4.20. Tried to nap this afternoon but couldn't as my bedroom was too light and I coukdnt be bothered to get up and turn light off.

Did quite a bit of crochet through the day.

When I got up I went to the library. Collected dcs from school.
Put a load of washing on.
Fish and chips for tea.
Had a bath.
Need to go and ghange washing over before I go to bed...and switch dw on.

Feeling demoralised. Difficult to focus. House is a tip. It wasn't before dcs came home. But is now.

Have told dcs I will take them to park tomorrow.
Have told them I will make meatballs for tea...which means I have to go to butchers in the morning.
Have told them we will make pineapple upside down pudding tomorrow (no idea what posessed me on that one...)
Need to go to farm for guinea pig food.
Need to make s 43cm sunflower with dd3 for her homework....

Ferling overwhelmed.

Hugs to all. Huge group hug.

ThatVikRinA22 · 20/04/2013 00:22

aw egg i do feel for you at the minute - its sods law that your friend heard the conversation at the worst time possible.

i once lost my rock of a pal, i think ive talked to you about it via pm. Its really hard. It is a loss.

give your friend a few days and send a card or letter explaining.

and then i would try very hard to put a bit of distance (emotional) between you - i know she was your support but she was also a source of angst and upset too.

do what you can on that list for tomorrow, when you can. just potter and enjoy what you do get done.
the park is a good idea.
i need to take my own advice and walk the dog tomorrow.....this is my last weekend off for a while.
im digging out the zopliclone as i wont sleep the day before im due back to work.

i didnt get out of bed until gone 2pm today Blush i feel a bit of a set back looming but i need to stay focused and just get through next week.

OP posts:
EggwiniasRevenge · 20/04/2013 09:41

Thanks vicar. I will look back through my pms

I know you are right. I've had a nice 3 days focussing on my own dcs. Going to the shops on my own. Not being told I can't have mushy peas from the chipshop. I guess it is only when you break free you see what a hold some people have over you. But I can't take away the fact that she was my rock. Despite her shortcomings she did an awful lot for me over the last 12m and I can't take that away. I am gutted she found out the way she did it would have been horrible. Tbf our friendship only really started to break down over the brownie incident I pm'd you about a month ago. At the end of the day though this is probably the only way I would have been able to distance myself. I get clawed back cos something happens and I feel guilty.

Enjoy your weekend off. I am awake but just want to close my eyes again. I'm going to grt dd3 in here for a snuggle then crack on with my list of jobs.

Thanks for listening. Back later. X

EggwiniasRevenge · 20/04/2013 09:43

Dd3 has just rejected me in favour of horrid henry :(

Unfortunatelyanxious · 20/04/2013 09:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheSilveryPussycat · 20/04/2013 13:04

Hi all, Level 1 here, out of bed and been productive, mainly posting on MN and thinking, rather than physical tho! Blush. House is still a tip, but this is because it is full of stuff like new mop and bucket, pillows, etc.
So at least my jobs are uncommon ones - nail mop head to shank, replace batteries in phone handsets. And it's a lovely day, the wind has dropped, and I really need to do something in the garden.

ThatVikRinA22 · 20/04/2013 14:32

afternoon everyone.

well. level 3 here with bonus points but only because i have to go shopping.
ive lost my motivation to get myself off riding though....im going to text riding instructor and just tell her i will be back after i have next week over with.

egg - i can completely relate to the relationship you had with your friend. The pal i lost many years ago was so similar - but she was so incredibly bossy, organised things for me without consultation, took over a lot, involved her mother, organised my meals, my days, my plans, particularly when my DD was a baby. It got where i felt incapable of doing anything without her, and yet, when the relationship went sour, i managed just fine. i cried. i mourned. i missed her terribly. But she flounced when i stuck to my guns over something. She just cut me dead and that was that. it took some getting over, but i did get over it. If this friendship is worth anything then it will get sorted, but realistically, from what you say, it sounded a bit unhealthy. rock or no rock. and dont underestimate what you did for her - lending money etc etc.

i tried to repair the friendship i lost, but i only tried once, and it was clear that it was over.

I would send an explanation, or try to meet face to face, if it means you will get some peace from explaining what happened.

then the ball is in her court. and you try and get on with focusing on the kids, on doing what you need to do, on being strong enough to manage without friends who dont value a friendship enough to want to repair it, everyone talks behind peoples backs - its just human nature. Dont keep punishing yourself - try to sort it, but whatever happens might be for the best.

right. best go shopping.might even put some lippy on.... back later....

OP posts:
TheSilveryPussycat · 20/04/2013 14:39

I never do lippy, can I get points for brushing my hair? (I haven't btw, but am at Level 2/3 ie dressed in yesterday's clothes...)

HellesBelles396 · 20/04/2013 16:07

going for level 3 full bonuses tonight Smile

bassetfeet · 20/04/2013 17:46

Helles Grin.

ThatVikRinA22 · 20/04/2013 17:52

i am losing my marbles.

i went to pets at home to get cat litter and food - its the only place that does the litter i use....

and i came home with a rat. a rat that needed adopting from the adoption centre....she better stop biting me or she is going to be cat food! (not really)

OP posts:
EggwiniasRevenge · 20/04/2013 17:58

I know exactly what you mean...sounds like tge same woman....organising 'family' days out ...arranging time off school for my kids so they can go...telling me i cant have mushy peas in my own home as she doesnt like tge smell...inviting herself to meals (when I tried to pick a place I thought would exclude her)...arranging for ME to drive HER to HER friends without consultation. My argument was that it was 4mins of negativity. 4mins within a 6hr conversation about alsorts. I bet if you break it down she will have bitched about me for 4mins over a 6hr period. Like you say everyone bitches behind backs....

I do feel liberated. I have to see her on Monday. Not sure how that will go.

She's posting 'unkind' stuff on MY MUMS fb at the mo. And her daughter is posting unkind stuff (she defriended me so can't do anything directly).

It's just the pettiness of her behaviour. Yes I did wrong but atm I am sitting back and waiting for her to take the controlling first move. I'm not posting rubbish, albeit cloaked, rubbish all over facebook.

Sigh.

In positives...I've done a couple of loads of washing.
I'm even dressed to level 3....even thought about make up but have a mouth full of coldsores.
Took dcs to park.
Been to tesco.
Shopping is all away with help from dcs.
I'm now resting my extremely sore coccyx on my bed, trying not yo fall asleep.

EggwiniasRevenge · 20/04/2013 18:00

Can we name the rat????

Call it duvet?

Pwease....

And did you actually get tge cat litter???

ThatVikRinA22 · 20/04/2013 18:04

i got the cat litter. and food
then i sat in the car agonising over the bloody rat before i went back in and spent an obscene abount of money on a cage for her.
and she shows her gratitude by biting me....twice!

her name is apparently Pearl - but im not keen on pearl as a ratty name.
our other 2 were called kim and aggie.....

she is a beautiful silver grey colour.

OP posts:
bassetfeet · 20/04/2013 18:25

Any chance of a pic Vicar?

Lovely animals and wise creatures . My sister had one that more or less lived on her shoulder when at home . x

ThatVikRinA22 · 20/04/2013 18:40

i will link a pic later if i can get a good one....she is very sweet looking. a beautiful colour.... she just had a little cuddle but i popped her back in the cage and she has gone back into her box....

OP posts:
SnowyMouse · 20/04/2013 19:20

She sounds gorgeous vicar :)

bassetfeet · 20/04/2013 19:43

Oh bet you may wish you hadnt told us Vicar . Now we have distraction therapy re naming suggestions for your new arrival Smile.
So erm .we have Duvet from Ed and very apt it is .

I would like to put forward Olivia ,Rebecca ,Kate .......or Justine .
me brown nose ? Oh no Wink.

SilveryPussyCat is the right colour but maybe not the right vibe for a rat .

TheSilveryPussycat · 20/04/2013 19:49

I used to keep rats, BDC (before DCat and DC)

The first 3 I had may have come from the local uni Psychology Dept

EggwiniasRevenge · 20/04/2013 19:52

Bassett would be good....

I've got it! ROCKY!

bassetfeet · 20/04/2013 20:28

Ah Silvery they got away and had kindness . High Five you Wink.

ED feeling spooky shivers . My hamster was called Rocky bless him .
Brought him home on top of the bus with wee ones in tow ..in a cardboard box . Nigh on chewed my fingers off [me smiling and wincing ] and nodding to other passengers.
He escaped often and disconnected the phone wires twice . Somehow managed the stairs and woke us up snuggling into the duvet .
The little * lies asleep in my garden inside a light bulb box .
RIP Rocky . x

ThatVikRinA22 · 20/04/2013 20:31

right....here she is, despite the initial bitey experience we have now bonded Grin

she needs a name!

her given name at the pet shop is Pearl. Rocky good but a bit butch....she is very much a ladeeeeeee.!

OP posts:
bassetfeet · 20/04/2013 20:43

She is gorgeous Vicar

A topical name that comes to mind is Maggie . runs and hides Grin