Binge eaters accountability thread

[LucyLatimer]

A thread to check in and say how we are feeling with no judgment. Taking one day at a time.

He doesn't really mean it, but I suppose to him it's stating the obvious. I don't know. It just brings up the feelings of a diet will solve all my problems. It won't. I know. 🤷‍♀️ Urgh. I hate it so much.

I wish I could be normal. I'm so wrapped up in my looks. Why are they so important to me???

thefroglover sorry to hear* *you're not feeling so great this morning. Maybe don't eat too much if you are uncomfortable but don't deliberately starve yourself for the rest of the day. You'll just be in the same place later or tomorrow. Give your belly a little break then have dinner, something light even perhaps. Don't punish yourself even more.

mistyrock i always* *think that although I have to take responsibility and then act on it, I try not to berate myself for not being 'normal'. We are fed (ha!) a story from a young age that a certain kind of body is the only one to aspire to. And then we are bombarded with images online and in magazines of the body beautiful. Then we are bombarded with how to diet to look like that. And then, on top of that we are bombarded with adverts for crap food everywhere we look. No wonder we are fucked up.

So, although I have decided to take control of this and I do take responsibility for everything that I put in my mouth, i have decided to get angry at that societal pressure and say "fuck you!".

As long as I feel good in my body then what it looks like is secondary. I know I feel better if I eat well and move well. Looking slimmer and healthier is secondary to that. My work is very body focused and I choose (on a good day - I'm talking to myself here too) to focus on what it can do rather than what it looks like. And it's pretty damn clever what it can do.

Yes you are right, I suppose growing up during the time when heroin chic was the look and skinnier was always better, it's hard to move forward from that. I wish I could say my body was amazing but it failed to grow a baby to full term and mow I've got crohns and high blood pressure so it's not actually that fantastic. 😬 I had a slice of birthday cake and I enjoyed it. Time to move forward.

Oh misty, I had a prem baby too, your body is totally amazing xx

Thanks Cheese. It's a tough one isn't it.

No bingeing here today as have got a tummy bug. Well at least that is one thing I suppose.

My DH made this comment about the book 'just eat it' after having a look at it. He said so, are you just going to keep eating until you are like the woman in "What's eating Gilbert Grape" (very obese lady who has to sleep downstairs and eventually dies after climbing up the stairs) I just said, no, I'm not.

It's hard when they say things like that isn't it? Not helpful. His family do all have some body / food issues and he fasts most days just eating one meal in the evenings.

Do you know? That's interesting. I say that about myself sometimes too.
"If i don't stop you'll have to wheel me out like the mum iut of What's Eating Gilbert Grape".

It just dawned on me that I wouldn't accept that off anyone else, and I would never dream of saying it to anyone else. So why am I accepting talking to myself that badly?

I was thinking maybe it would help if we all thought of something we are good at. Or something we like about our bodies or ourselves. Let's talk to ourselves the way we talk to others, with compassion and kindness.

I've hidden my book for that very reason. No one who isn't going through it understands. I used to hide my diet stuff too though as the pressure to loss weight felt too great.

My tummy has got through several operations for small bowel obstruction (life saving) It now looks like a hot cross bun with all the scarring, but I wouldn't be here if it hadn't healed. I guess that is a positive thing.

I was going to hide the book too but thought, stuff it. he didn't get it though so maybe would have been better. (however think he could learn from it)

It is a positive thing but it can be hard to embrace. I don't like the way my tummy sticks out when I have extra weight, due to a cesarean, don't get wrong they did a wonderful job and it only goes shelfy with weight gain. Without ity son wouldn't be here.

Not been a good day so far for me. I had an Iceland shop delivered at 11am and so far I’ve eaten 4 crisps and nearly a whole pack of Maryland biscuits. I feel sick and my teeth are hurting. I’m not even really enjoying it, just eating for the sake of it🤦‍♀️

You wouldn’t believe it as I’ve been out of the house for a few hours to take my 9 week son to his physio appointment. When doing a food shop I try to avoid buying junk food because I know I can’t help myself but then I feel bad for when guests come round and I have no snacks to offer them.

Tomorrow I’ll be leaving both of my kids to go Thorpe Park so that’ll mean a lot of walking and practically no time to binge eat. I’ve been doing so well though so I’m quite annoyed with myself. Oh well, what can you do ey

Something I like about myself, hm I have very pert breasts! (Very hard to breastfeed a prem baby so I never did). I have nice legs and good teeth.

Today I’ve eaten:
2 slices toast with peanut butter
scrambled eggs on a piece of toast with smoked salmon
a packet of mini cheddars
a fruit scone with jam and cream
olives and two crackers
spagghetti bolognaise with some spiralised courgette (but also some normal spaghetti mixed in) and two pieces of dark chocolate.

written down I can see it’s actually quite a lot isn’t it? Although I never actually think I eat tons and tons this is actually overeating isn’t it?
For me I really need to force myself to come to terms with the fact that I’m an overeater, looking at this list it’s pretty disgusting 😞

Try not to dwell on it. It's not the end of the world. Maybe buy biscuits you don't l like for guests? I've never really liked ginger nuts so I don't think I'd be tempted too much by them. Funny, my teeth hurt too after a big binge!

Mine are too big to be pert! 😂 I had to express for my son as he was too tiny for formula.
I have nice slim long legs and my bottom is okay.

@Pookymalooky (wow I've learnt to add a name!) I don't think you've eaten loads at all. Maybe I'm just a gannet!

Mine are big too!!

I had meatballs tonight and pasta. I haven't had pasta for years! I normally have courgetti. Because I can't have carbs, even though I binge on white bread! So many messed up rules! Really enjoyed it, with loads of cheese.
Had my consultation with hypnotist today. Fingers crossed I've got high hopes.

Thank you Misty, this is actually a good idea!

Ginger biscuits taste like vom to me so I definitely wouldn’t be tempted to touch it. And yes, my teeth hurt so badly. Especially the top ones right at the back. Just another reason to try to not each so much

@pedropony76 its my bottom right (wisdom growing on an angle) and my top right. Isn't it strange. I only put 2 and 2 together after the last bout of toothache.

@cheeseisthebest I'm extremely jealous that yours are both big and pert! Mine have never been anything but saggy! 😬 Hence my excitement at the push up bikini's!

Add on another scone (without the jam and cream) with my evening cup of tea!
I guess it’s all relative isn’t it? My loads might be someone else’s normal or healthy? But my being good might be someone else’s naughty?
But I think I know that other people who are slim and in control of their eating don’t eat quite as much (or the same types of food) as I do. I just cannot get my head to click in to stop choosing the wrong foods and to stop eating when I’m no longer hungry!

I'm off to bed and I'm feeling a lot more positive than I did when I woke up. I've been looking at a few dresses on line. Maybe I'll get them. Maybe I won't buy they look flattering and the reviews are good. I've eaten a few bits outside of my normal meals but I've not gone into a robotic binge, I've not prowled the kitchen for junk food.

Great to hear what some of you like about yourself. A bit of positivity doesn't do any harm. Even if it feels hard to do.

I like my legs and my eyes and my dark colouring.

I had my son's birthday yesterday. We had a great time in the woods with a bbq and a fire. I tried to not over buy lots of crap but I was aware of it being there and I ate a lot of sweet stuff.

My husband had more stuff off the bbq than me but he didn't even look at the marshmallows or the ice cream or the cake. Whereas I couldn't think of anything else knowing they were there.

I can really second the idea of buying the biscuits you don't like. I am vegetarian and dairy free and gluten free and I only had crisps (accidentally) yesterday that I couldn't eat. So i didn't eat them. There is a lot left in the cupboard but I wouldn't be tempted to eat them .

I do think there is a difference between eating unhealthily and a lot in a day to binging.

Yesterday wasn't the healthiest and i would certainly be slimmer if I could take or leave the sweet stuff but it wasn't a binge. I think if I can get a handle on the binging it would be a good start. Then maybe I can work on the sweet tooth slowly.

I am deliberately not posting what I eat in a binge or in a day as I think everyone's acceptable levels will be different. I look at some of the things some people are posting as too much and think that's nothing. But some others might find mine the same. Or it might be much more. I think it's a mindset rather than comparing amounts. (Just to be clear, i mean for me. I'm happy for others to post what they have eaten and discuss it, if it helps).