Binge Eating Disorder Support 3

[FightingBed2014]

Welcome, this thread is for those that have disordered eating / Binge Eating Disorder (BED) and need support. We are all working towards a better relationship with food, together. Everyone is welcome to join in and share as much or as little as you like. Our focus is on learning to be happy with who we are right now and moving away from our negative self image, thoughts and eating patterns one step at a time.

Previous threads can be found here:

Thread 1 March 2014
Thread 2 October 2014

My blog following recovery from BED can be read here:Fighting BED

Many of us are following Dr Fairburn's Overcoming Binge Eating Second Edition book Here This is also used by a lot of Eating Disorder services in their treatment programmes.

Although we have no rules, we would ask that people either avoid talking about or be mindful when it is necessary that the following can be a trigger for those with an eating disorder; asking advice on how to start a new diet, talking about specific weight and clothes sizes. Please also remember that those supporting you need support too.

This thread was started by a BED sufferer and the majority of contributors are Eating disorder sufferers and not professionals. As with any online forum, it is best to supplement support on here with real life support and advice from professionals

Sounds like a great plan Bonnie! I think lots of us who have been on restrictive diets struggle to gauge what the 'right' amount of food is. I constantly have to remind myself to increase my portion sizes. At the moment I find eating intuitively difficult too, but if we keep at it for long enough our brains will eventually readjust!

And that is the best news about your counsellor, it sounds like you covered a lot of ground! At the same time, I'd also suggest that your BED recovery isn't necessarily reliant on you already having worked through those issues.

Also just wanted to share . I've been finding the Kerr's materials really helpful in eating better / more. It's all good but at about 18:40 he talks about how we need to eat much more in order to head off the binge urges.

Based on a period of tracking my food intake (on my counsellor's advice), I know that my weight remains stable and maybe declined at around 2,500 - 2,600 calories a day. At the peak of my crash-dieting days I was eating about half that. Admittedly I'm quite tall and maybe on the active side, but it's unlikely that you should be eating less than 2,000 calories.

Fridays are normally tricky for me, especially when I'm not in the office, so I'm going to concentrate on getting in filling meals and snacks today too. Have a good day all :)

Sorry, just wanted to say I'm not advocating that anyone start counting calories, but it's one route to re-setting your portion sizes if you're unsure of how much to eat. If I ever find myself slipping back into diet-y portions, then looking at my plate and thinking 'that's only 300 calories, that's not nearly enough to sustain me until my next snack' - for me that's a helpful way of putting the 'eat more at mealtimes' guideline into practice.

Bonnie

I would say it is a shame to be dictated to by the 3 meals, 2 0r 3 snacks a day - if that makes you feel rebellious. I understand what you mean, so it is tricky.

The main point is that adding high density, balanced nutrition throughout the day, at frequent intervals- such as roughly every three/ hours, will stop your primitive brain from thinking you are malnourished/starving and taking over and will help prevent low moods and cravings.

If you get caught out, away from home, and feel starving, getting some nuts and some water can help.

Adding may feel difficult, but it is adding self love, self care. You would begin to thrive.

You would not have to ever think about calories/weight loss with this.
Your body will find its own perfect balance bit by bit, over time, and you won't believe how well you'll feel. Your immune system will be wonderful too; and your energy levels.

The vitamins and minerals I suggested before can help too. (Not Vit D if you live somewhere very bright and are out a lot, but in the UK that is often not the case)

Hi Kind - thanks for this. And sorry if I've missed this but are you a health professional or ED therapist? You've given lots of great advice over the last couple of weeks, but I didn't get the impression that you were an ED sufferer - would be good to know where it's coming from...?

Hoping for a place to share. I have been here in the past.

I have very disordered eating. Currently, I'm having some other health issues and have been put on the mini pill. This has plummeted my mood and increased my appetite. I've managed to lose 3st last year, but I've now gained 1st of this back and still can't get a grip of it.

Have no idea where to begin to try and sort myself out. I feel incredibly defeated with everything atm.

IronMAggie
I am sorry, as I thought I had said something about myself that would answer that question you asked, but I looked through the thread and could not find it so maybe mentioned it somewhere else.

I suffered from an eating disorder , when I was young but luckily, by good luck, recovered relatively quickly. It began as anorexia/bulimia after a trauma. I also suffered some EA as a child although there was also love. Unfortunately, my family has had had a great deal of EDs through the generations..

I have a very close relationship with someone similarly affected to other posters here with severe BE disorder. (I cannot say more) but means I now have about 10 years immersed experience. I have personally had help with ED counsellors about the person in question, also from the head of NCFED & read numerous books and studies. I have also been in touch with a nutritionist.

I know from bitter experience that good advice is hard to come by though it is getting much better.

The person close to me finally saw two nutritionists as well as several counsellors for the emotional aspects.

My experience of nutritional aspects is derived from those nutritionists and counsellors as well as reading. It is also personal in that it relates to myself -and family members prone to ED/other problems, who need to maintain even blood sugar in order to keep even moods. How to deal with this is becoming generally better known these days.

I also have personal experience of how Mindfulness and EFT can help with problems, though have not posted about them here, as on this thread people already have enough to deal with.

I understand too everyone is an individual in their journey to overcome BE & would hesitate to mention anything too psychological.

However I feel enormous sympathy when I see someone posting, and I can guess that they may not have felt they could eat enough - and want to let them know, that strange as it may seem, eating could help towards them getting better.

Iron thank you so much for sharing that video it's brilliant and has clarified my thoughts around recovery. They showed the pyramid of recovery and I think where I'm going wrong is I'm trying to jump straight to step 3 (intuitive eating) rather than using the 3 meals/3 snacks as a lever up to the next steps.

I was a bit worried that I'd have to have an extremely structured day around food for the rest of my life which felt like obsessing about food still just in a different way. But now I can see it's just one step towards the end goal.

Kind will look into the vitamins that you suggested - willing to give anything a go! Agree about adding into my diet and in turn self care. For too long I've felt that I don't deserve to be happy or feel good and slowly starting to change that.

I had a thought today while driving. The only time in my life (since being a child) that I haven't had cycles of bingeing is my two pregnancies. I didn't binge at all during them and i always thought I was just eating well for the babies but looking back I was very structured in having set meals and substantial snacks and without realising was following fairburn's method. I put on only a little weight with both yet was eating much more and feeling really good about myself. Was an interesting thought!

Bonnie152
I put on only a little weight with both yet was eating much more and feeling really good about myself. Was an interesting thought!

I think you have hit the nail on the head there. What you did to help your babies happened to help you too.

Now, you deserve as much love and care as you gave your babies!

Here is a link on how to find a good therapist from the head of NCED in the UK.

It might be helpful.

eating-disorders.org.uk/information/how-to-find-a-good-eating-disorder-therapist/

Welcome back Kinky, how have things been since you were last with us?

Thanks very much that Kind, it's always good to have some context.

And do keep chatting away everyone - our dear Fighting reminded me that we were nearing the end of our 1,000 posts though, so we now have a shiny new thread to move on to - hopefully I've done that right!

Iron. Tough - fibromyalgia has made it really hard going and I've turned to food. It's getting worse atm, harder to control. I'm really ashamed at myself and feel really sick - literally. I just can't seem to get a grip. I know I have depression, I take ADs already, but think the hormones have made it all much worse. Don't really know what to do with myself, tbh.

Very sorry KInky I hope you can get some help.

Hi Kinky glad you feel able to join us and chat again. We all understand its not always easy.

kind as Maggie said thanks for all the great advice and support, you certainly seem to have a vast knowledge of ED and working towards recovery. Its never an easy area and I also feel for you too, having someone close to you with an ED must be incredibly tough. I was with a different EDS but found them to be a huge help and would recommend seeking their services too.

Bonnie I'd second what was said before, you absolutely deserve the same love and attention. It can take a time but it is entirely possible to shift our thought processes towards loving ourselves, small steps is the key.x

I realised highlighting small steps makes it look like another username, I meant it as emphasis 😄x

Kinky do you get much RL help.with the fibromyalgia? I know from experience of someone close to me just how hard life with the condition can be but also how little help there can be too.x

all .

Fighting none at all. I'm still teaching FT and that is really hard going. I find I'm good for nothing on an evening. The gyne issues I'm having are flaring it all up, then all I do is eat. I've put on 5lbs this week and not sure I'm going to be able to squeeze into my work trousers tomorrow.

Sounds like you have a lot to deal with kinky. Have you pestered the Dr for more help? Is it as simple as that?

On a practical note do you have something you could wear instead of trousers that might be snug? I just know too tight clothes make me feel bad all day.

Not great here. Very focused on size. :( Had a lovely day yest but in the even instead of enjoying my friend's party I was just v focused on what I looked like & what ppl must be thinking. Tried to be brave and had pictures taken but hate most of them.

Today am hungover, still thinking about that and what a difficult day it has been with DS. I could hear my DF when I spoke to him and that is not good.

Am tired & on which isn't helping I am sure.

Have driven around the corner on the pretext of buying bread but just sitting here crying. At least I am not eating I guess.

Interestingly my business coach has asked me to write down my thoughts during the day. Negative & positive and said I can include personal ones if I like. She wants to help me challenge my self-limiting beliefs.

Depressingly, they are mainly negative so far.

Need to try to get back to exercise this week. I think I could do with the endorpins!

Hope everyone else had a good weekend?

Kinky
I wonder of you've seen this link for fibromyalgia?
www.webmd.com/fibromyalgia/guide/fibromyalgia-the-diet-connection?page=3 It suggests keeping a record incase anything makes it worse for you.

Do you think you would be able to discuss your pill with your GP? Maybe your present one does not suit you?

You mentioned depression. Small meals regularly can help for this too.

Also here is an interesting article by Pubmed: Rapid recovery from depression using Magnesium. www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16542786
Here is a quote from it:

Case histories are presented showing rapid recovery (less than 7 days) from major depression using 125-300 mg of magnesium (as glycinate and taurinate) with each meal and at bedtime. Magnesium was found usually effective for treatment of depression in general use. Related and accompanying mental illnesses in these case histories including traumatic brain injury, headache, suicidal ideation, anxiety, irritability, insomnia, postpartum depression, cocaine, alcohol and tobacco abuse, hypersensitivity to calcium, short-term memory loss and IQ loss were also benefited

Vitamin D (see the Vit D council website) B Vitamins. Zinc. Omega 3 oils
It is possible to be in a state of a sort of malnutrition even if it does not look like it because of weight

Sorry MrsMargot that you had a difficult day yesterday and were sitting there crying. It sounds like you dealt with it in a nice calm way though, just going round the corner to sit peacefully.

I think everyone worrries about photos of themselves! Everyone else probably thought you looked very nice in yours.

You business coach sounds helpful.

Thanks everyone foe your kind messages

Ppl are chatting on the new thread - shall we move across:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/eating_disorders/2652882-Binge-Eating-Disorder-Support-4?