Why does covid hate the East of England? Wrong answers only please.

[TaxTheRatFarms]

Now before I start, I’m VERY VERY GLAD that we have incredibly low numbers of coronavirus cases here in the East of England, and long may it last.

But why oh why does coronavirus not flourish here? For the purposes of avoiding doom, I’m accepting wrong answers only.

1. Whichever gene gives you webbed feet (necessary in the soggy fens) also protects against covid. (I’m a previous owner of webbed toes and remain covid free )

2. No airborne viruses can survive here as it’s so bloody windy all the time.

Any other (probably inaccurate) reasons?

Coronavirus doesn’t appreciate Alan Partridge

We don’t like outsiders and Covid knows this, so hasn’t bothered trying

Chris Whitty just put the blame on young people

Not enough young in the east?

I've only driven through the fens once and I found it quite eerie. Maybe coronavirus is scared?

Incest boosts immunity?

@Rebelwithallthecause

Coronavirus doesn’t appreciate Alan Partridge

This statue was for protection then?? Suddenly it all makes sense! Alan Statue

It prefers an intelligent host, not those 'normal for Norfolk'

raffle too true. The 2 metre apart rule dramatically increased how close people got to each other. Pre-covid, people maintained a strict distance of 97 yards.

I am in a part of the East of England which has rapidly increasing cases. 37 per 100,000. This has doubled in the past week.

Outsiders wouldn’t know that, and would be swiftly booted back over the border all the way to London Village.

@BunsyGirl

I am in a part of the East of England which has rapidly increasing cases. 37 per 100,000. This has doubled in the past week.

Let me know the general area and I’ll arrange for you all to be fenced in

Seriously though that sucks. I hope the numbers come down for you very soon. It’s very weird indeed to see the places where it is spiking and to see areas where it should take off (Cambridge?) and then doesn’t.

It's the wind coming over from the Urals. Too dry and icy for covid to flourish

@TaxTheRatFarms It’s a part of Essex but is very rural. Strangely, the areas immediately next to us which are much more densely populated have half the number of cases.

Wicked Witch of the West sends it over, doesn't she.

It's too impatient to travel on all the single rack roads from 'the north' where it likes to hang out.

Because all the landed gentry and government members are busy shooting small animals over there and the covid roolz don’t apply to them remember?

There's no motorway.

It’s so bracing here!

It’s on its way but stuck behind a tractor

Perhaps sugar beet and carrots have a deterrent effect

It only likes proper chips and northern gravy.

Because an East wind never brings any good.

“There's an east wind coming all the same, such a wind as never blew on England yet. It will be cold and bitter, Watson, and a good many of us may wither before its blast. But it's God's own wind none the less and a cleaner, better stronger land will lie in the sunshine when the storm has cleared.”

Connan Doyle

Vikings do it harder?

It came, got stuck in the Histon Road roadworks nightmare and hotfooted it back down the M11 to London

It’s all the carrots and turnips we eat.