Coronavirus Briefing Bingo

[MockersxxxxxxxSocialDistancing]

Hancock has said "We have been very clear" twice. If he says it again, I'm going to shout "House!"

Also looking out for 'Guided by the science' and 'The PM is working hard...'

Any more?

Still not managing 100k tests. "A little hitch in the lab."

Checking in because I'm watching the chase

Today is a weird one because we all know about the announcement on Sunday, but its also the day when we are supposed to either start to come out or be extended.

Why will they not acknowledge that the NHS coped because a lot of people who should have been in hospital were not, or were not taken early enough, our high death toll being the inevitable result?

Have you renewed the regulations or not?

Simple Question. Raab dodged it.

Raab has been very clear.

The govt's policy is "to take the right decisions."

How long did it take them to hammer that one out?

Raab's sweating a bit, bet he'll be glad when this one is over!

Why do we have to wait til Sunday for the new rules?

No coherent explanation.

Dr Jennie looks exhausted today.

*Why do we have to wait til Sunday for the new rules?

No coherent explanation*

I'm assuming this was a question on the briefing. Why can't they just be honest and say cos its a bank holiday? We're not stupid we know this anyway.

Wonder if he's re-iterating the whole it will be very small so we dont all bugger off out over the weekend. Then again he could actually be telling the truth

Slogan of the week 'Think about R in the context of the prevalence'.

Bold fail there

Beth Rigby (Sky) asked about the timing of the announcement. The point is people have been prepped by the demented headlines in today's Tory rags to expect an end of lockdown in advance of a bank holiday.

Expect crowded parks and beaches.

'Think about R in the context of the prevalence'.

-Parklife!

I did a finals paper on Data Analysis and I'm loving the ONS boffin

Raab: 'Brilliant.' Twat.

Is no one going to mention the immensely hypocritical and shouty Beth Rigby?

No? Why not?

She has just shouted, seemingly quite exasperated, that giving the British public news of a road map out of lockdown just before a bank holiday weekend is outrageous and dangerous.

Grab your [TARDIS] Beth. Easter weekend... You were then shouting that it was irresponsible NOT to give the British public some idea of how we would come out of lockdown.

Which is it? Or do we not notice inconsistent, changing messages when it is not a Tory minister?

Where's Whitty? He's not been on all week.
He brightens the briefings for me.
Oh well time for 🍷...

"blah blah success of social distancing and maintaining in the next few weeks blah blah"

Ha ha

Sorry Mockers, I see we cross posted re Dear Beth!

Run Raabit Run couldn't get away quick enough.

Very good of him to reel off London, Edinburgh, Cardiff, Belfast. I expect he's been hard at work studying the Great Big Atlas for Foreign Secretaries.

If they government take anything from that it’s that they shouldn’t invite Laura Kussenburg or Beth Rigby back ever again. Total idiots who can’t seem to listen to what’s already been said

I had blanked Laura. She was a tad beside herself too.

I wonder were Rob is? It made me laugh last week when Hancock called him Rob and immediately reverted to Robert. I know a press photographer who has worked with him and calling him Rob, when you are a mere colleague, is utterly verboten.

Where's Whitty? He's not been on all week.
He brightens the briefings for me.
Oh well time for 🍷...

Yep. Today was a let down in that respect.

Oh Goody, Coronavirus Briefing, some escape from the Clappers' street party outside. Who knew that VE Day 1945 was a cheesy 80s disco?

Useless Eustice today, with 646 new dead bodies.

The Boffins are clearly pissed off with having to keep showing the Five Test Peldge Card and pass over it as quickly as possible,

Next Slide....