30s TTC - Butterdish Smashing World Record Attempt

[PollyPoo]

Line up, line up for the world record attempt for most dropped butterdishes per fred.

The bar is here, along with squishy sofas, some fluffy beanbags, low lighting, and most important of all, free booze.

I have installed some naked waiters (Morgan from being human, together with Russell Howard) - they have trays of champagne cocktails that can never run out, so dig in laydeez and lets make this a fred to remember.

Yeah, that LPD shit is bad, man.

The missis has a 10 day LP. We don't know if its cos of progesterone or oestrogen, though. Doc didn't seem too bothered about it cos he said IVF should sort it, which was before he told us to go away and not come back.

I really hope you get something sorted and the B6 works for ya! Also hope the endo thing goes ok.

Is it a scan or do they have to have a poke around for that?

Think he'll have a poke around and then if he thinks it's nec, arrange a laparoscopy, the thought of which scares the living shit out of me (involves general anesthetic).

I can't have IVF, as I'm always whinging about, cos of other health reasons. We gotta win via Teh Secks, so LPD shite is doubly arrrgh.

Your fucking Dr is a piece of work. Did you never complain? Worra cunt

No IVF? Woah, man, that's a real pain in the arse!

In that case, I really, really hope it works out for you. Do the lot. Yoga, accupuncture, reflexology, crystals, reiki...

Mind you, you'll prolly be too knackered for the shagging if you do all that!

yeah, doc's a cunt. Its no wonder lezzers take dodgy risks with fella's sperm when docs give us that shite.

Now where did I put John Barrowman?
Ohhh Jooohhhhhnnnnn, where arrreeee yooooouuuu?

Just got in from work, bloody knackered, but Scorpy I was reading some stuff on t'interet recently about estrogen dominance - some dr called John Lee did loads of research into it. Might be worth a look? Glad the spermz is good.

I need some violence please. I am CD7, droid left 4 days ago - today I started spotting. WTF? So I did what any self-respecting BESH would do and POAS. And the answer was 'fuck off you mental, how can you even think you are up the duff?' Bah....

Just a bit of leftover droid, innit, Pol? I occasionally get that. Me 'n' you got droiding wombs that are just too legit to quit.

Will Google John Lee and check his shiz out. I have stopped drinking water out of plastic bottles, cos plastic has oestrogen in it. TYF says nuffink, just looks at me like

And can we get Barrowman back, ASAP? Everyone loves sitting on the face of Boe.

I'll get me coat

Hi Scorps,

I have a short luteal phase, but it seems that progesterone lengthens it...normally I ovulate cd17/18 and droid cd25/26.

When using progesterone (or having used it the month before) this has changed...eg last month OV around CD14 (if memory serves), and drios CD31!! Unheard of, for me...last month was the most extreme example, but what a difference!

Quite a few drs don't believe in LPDs though, so you are lucky to have someone who considers it an issue!

Might be worth looking into.

What is it with all the weirdly dressed children in the streets today??

Switty - another diff! Congrats!

Poo I had weird spotting throughout my last cycle, couldn't work out what it was but first lot was when I ovulated around day 8/9. Could it be that? Also, 1001 Carpet Cleaner is good for wee or sick soaked furniture!

Scorps - glad you got the results matey and sorry to hear they've thrown another issue out at you. I am sure you won't be the only woman to have this and that there is something that can be done somewhere. Keep the faith, hon

(sorry - will post properly later, just wanted to do quickie....as it were)

Morning BESHIes

Scorpalina good news re: Jizz, bad news re: LPD - but perhaps good that you can start working out what you can do? Have a snuggle in my oversize comedy tits. xx

muser good news on dropping levels

poo take a pinch and a grope

muse good news on the dropping levels. Keep up the good work!

scorps glad about the jizz, sorry about the LPD. On the plus side at least your starting to narrow things down to find the exact problem. Hopefully something can be done to sort it.

Well, the boyf & I had our appointment at IVF Clinic today. After we rowed & nearly split up driving in rush hour traffic & wandering aimlessly around the fucking hospital, it all went well.

Consultant explained options, then sai my HSG results good (ie no blockage) & boyf's JIAP results good. Woooah there, I say. We were previously told it was on the low side. She said the lower side of perfectly average, but totally within whatever levels it has to be. Obviously glad to hear that but very at months of thinking it was a problem. They the surprise of the day they mentioned a scan, which can see ovaries in more detail than HSG. OK says I. The boyf & I are shown into a room, & there in all its glory was dildocam! Why oh why when they mentioned a scan didn't I see that one coming? So, they sat the boyf behind a screen while me, student nurse, student consultant & main consultant all have a look-see up my tunnel of love. Twas a strange moment when student consultant & main consultant both held dildocam. I almost felt like I was interuppting a beautiful moment. Anyway, once again all looks good (actual words of consultant).

So............(I'm nearly done) They've put us on waiting list for IUI(6 months) & IVF (12 - 18 months) as plans B & C. I current;y have 6 months supply of Clomid in my bag, which I need to start taking on droid day 2. Am currently on day 6. Arsebiscuits.

So, that's me. SWI as usual, just next month I'll be Super-Fertile (said with arm out-stretched in Superman pose).

Anyhoo, back at work so better catch up. Obviously I had to email RL friend & BESHes first - I got me priorities right!

I really should preview posts before sending - spelling & grammar rubbish. Big apologies.

Well done Lorry, all systems go for you!

Laurie has magic pills!! Will you share them around with your lovely barren friends pleeeease? That's great news though, here's hoping that it all happens very quickly for you now.

Hooray for magic pills!

Laurie I'm delighted for you about the good results from the dildocam ordeal and other checks. Great that it's all looking good. Hope that the super-fertility will do the trick! You know your description made me think I may in fact have had dildocam a while back. I sort of zone out when I have these horrible check-ups, so the details are fuzzy, but there was a screen, with an image of my insides and it must have come from somewhere .

Sorry for the crap and unhelpful medical feedback for you Scorps - my mind is literally boggling at the thought of possible repeat CPs/MCs. Must have been a shocking thought for you too. I am doing my best to deal with /steel myself for that possibility this month and I simply can't imagine experiencing it several times. I hope that the natural stuff you are taking is doing the trick and I think acupuncture could really be worth a try. Haven't tried it myself, but have heard it recommended so many times.

I am still menkuling away in my corner. Maybe we could actually install a padded corner here, somewhere near the pit, where people can gibber quietly and put straws in their hair? I'll inaugurate it. Test line this morning was just a bit fainter than yesterday (same brand) so now I am afraid levels are falling.

Arrgghh. If only you could just know one way or the other. I am on gusset-watch anyway. I'll keep you posted.

Anyway, I'm off work tmw and have two good friends coming for the weekend.I will say nowt of course, but hopefully, they'll get me through to Monday anyway, when I should have a clearer idea.

PS: I am sure my hand-wringing and navel-gazing is annoying. Thanks for putting up with me.[brokenly grateful emoticon]

It is a worrying time Switty but a line is a line! Maybe less of a line because of the time of day you pissed on it? Do you have a history of MC? Is that why you're so concerned? You are going to get yourself in debt with the amount of POAS you are doing! You are pregnant woman, and you're going to have to accept it pretty soon!!

Come here my pretties, come & sample my magic pills.........

psst, ladies. There's a fred in AIBU about someone calling another lady, ahem, barren. They are all saying what a bitch, what a horrible word etc etc.

I saw that one too LauriePop (say it with a Chinese accent...mildly racist, but fun!!)

I'm sure they would understand if they read our thread

There's a difference between us calling ourselves barren and some uninvited friend using the word. I'd be pissed off if some newly sprogged woman called me barren.

Yo, barren muthafuckers!

How's it gahn?

Sorry to drop in unannounced, but I literally just pissed myself in work reading this thread.

My colleagues are concerned. Am now trying to fake a coughing fit to cover it up.

ello goodluck are you a BESH? Or just a stalker seeking bad-taste entertainment?