TTC May 2023 💝 Previous MC March 2023 (thread 4)

[Sez281]

I didn't realise the last thread was full ladies! Can't believe it took so little time but it's been a busy couple of months!

@Westy22
@Jadeypie
@xxcxdonxx
@SnookyPook
@Supertrooper101
@Hankthehonk
@HopeAndStrength
@DmcinT
@Paws4thought

If I've forgotten anybody I'm really sorry and please tag them...

For all of us who have recently got BFPs, all of those still trying and for all the lovely updates about new arrivals let's hope this lucky thread continues for us all 🙏🌈💝 xx

[Sez281]

Thanks all for all the messages about the scan. The worry is still there but definitely feel more hopeful 🙏

@xxcxdonxx that's a good idea, every second day definitely won't do any harm 👌

@Supertrooper101 oh I'm sure everything is fine, they'd have told you if something was wrong with heartbeat (actually it was private place that gave me those figures on Saturday so maybe the others don't focus on numbers at all at this stage 🤷‍♀️ When is your 12 week scan etc?

@Jadeypie Id say it's the break as opposed to the meds that are to thank for the calmness, it just goes to show how much our bodies need it x

@SnookyPook How are you doing? I'm guessing still in the no news is great news zone? X

@Westy22 definitely had and still have some back ache along with my cramps. I do think it's quite normal, so hard not to worry though xx

@Hankthehonk oh I forgot you'd had a section too. That's great that you're a bit more mobile now 👌 It's lovely coming into spring/summer on maternity leave too 😎

@Paws4thought hope you're doing ok xx

[Jadeypie]

Thread number four!!! We do like to talk haha! Thanks for the tag @Sez281 xx

[Supertrooper101]

@Sez281 just thinking yesterday is that thread gona fill up soon lol erm, usual appointment tomorrow and the other '12 wk' scan nxt week.. scary times lol Did you get the midwifes sorted?
I cant remember ppls updates now from the last thread...🤦‍♀️ ill catch up as this fills up tho lol

[DmcinT]

Girls I’m so sorry I’ve been totally MIA. The last month has been a blur, a lovely blur but a blur all the same 🫠🙌🏽🥰 I’ve gone to write this or catch up with messages here a few times and then been called to duty and never got a chance. I’ve a load of messages to catch up on everyone but thanks for keeping be in the loop❤️ I hope everyone is doing well, I’m always thinking on u all x

Our little girl Mollaí arrived on Valentine’s Day 🥹 and stole our hearts 💕 she been amazing and a full on worldwind into our life’s, she’s 3 weeks today🎀

[Paws4thought]

@Sez281 thanks for starting a new thread, completely forgot about your scan, glad it went well... not long til the 12 weeks one now. I'm OK, just waiting to get negative test so can start again.
@xxcxdonxx thanks for the link to opk strips, I'm using the easy@home at the moment but will try those when I run out as they're cheaper haha.
@Hankthehonk that 4 weeks has gone really quickly!!
@Westy22 that's great that digital has changed to 2-3, have you got a scan booked?
@Jadeypie glad you're feeling calm, and in a good head space 😀
@DmcinT congratulations on the arrival of your little girl, on valentines too, what a perfect gift!
@Supertrooper101 good luck at your appointment! 😀

[Westy22]

Good luck today @Supertrooper101 x

@Paws4thought no I haven't booked anything yet, going to wait till next week before I book something for 8 weeks. A whole different type of anxiety has hit and I'm feeling an immense doom that something isn't right so I'm just navigating my way through that now 😩 I hate how mc literally destroys the experience.

@DmcinT aww congratulations ❤️ valentines baby 😍

[xxcxdonxx]

Thanks @Sez281 , that last one filled up quickly! It’s all of that lovely news being shared 🥰

Congratulations @DmcinT on your lovely little valentines arrival 💕 Glad to hear that she is doing well.

Thinking of you for your appointment @Supertrooper101

Aw @Westy22 I'm sorry, the experience really is so different after a mc. Has anything happened that’s making you feel that way?

[Westy22]

Basically i totally do it to myself, i fall down rabbit holes reading about how back ache is bad etc🙈 @xxcxdonxx waking up today it wasn't so bad and I was kinda like "that's because it's over now" I'm going to spend the day in work dragging myself back out of this hole, torturing myself isn't going to change anything. I've still get sensitive boobs and I got a weird dull ache under my breastbone today...maybe a heart attack 🤣 🙈 I think I've done a week of positive and now I'm well into the absolute sheer fear of the current unknown. X

[SnookyPook]

@Sez281 thanks for the new thread! I spotted the other one was almost full and then forgot again! Yes, hopefully on the no news is good news. Tmi but actually dared to DTD with DH for the first time since the BFP last night! Bless him he's been so kind and patient but was definitely in need of some special attention 😂

@Supertrooper101 hope your appointment goes well 💕 I've never been told heart rate at any of my appointments until I specifically asked at the 16wk with the Doppler (158!!).

@Westy22 oh bless you hearing your thoughts brings back so much from Christmas time for me. You're right, it's unfair that previous loss robs us of that joy and excitement of early pregnancy. We've all been there with the hyper alert for bad signs etc. I had the backache one too... And still here.. so hopefully that is some comfort for you. One day at a time. 💕

@DmcinT congratulations on the safe arrival of your darling girl 🥰 How wonderful! And she's always guaranteed cards on Valentine's day 😂💗

[Jadeypie]

@DmcinT awww congratulations 🎊 I've been thinking of you! Glad little girls doing great! Hope your coping well with the madness of newborn stage haha. Xx

@Westy22 totally understandable as @SnookyPook says she was once in your shoes xmas and everyone else who's got there bfp. Make sure you take it easy in work xx

Af is on her was had some spotting today so looks like a 28 cycle this month for me xx

[xxcxdonxx]

That’s totally understandable @Westy22 , it’s almost easier to set yourself up to believe something won’t last rather than believe it may.
I know it doesn’t give you full reassurance but with my successful pregnancies and MCs, my symptoms were so varied between them and I couldn’t attribute particular symptoms to any outcome.
How far along are you now? Could you contact EPU for an early scan? You may not be able to see a heartbeat at that stage but might let you know things are progressing as expected.

[DmcinT]

Thanks so much girls🎀💕

@Westy22 oh I’m so happy for u and ur bfp 🥳🎉 what lovely news to see❤️ and believe me everything ur feeling is totally normal, I found it so hard to relax and believe it was good news the whole way through, as u say it’s so sad that MC takes that innocent happiness away. How far along are u now and how are u feeling, any symptoms yet?

@Paws4thought I’m so sorry to read what u have been through💔 how are u feeling about everything now? Will the hospital/gp do some testing for u?

@SnookyPook haha initially I’d thought any other day but VD but now I actually love it and as u say shell Always have something to celebrate and get cards 😅 how far along are u now and how’s the form?

@Jadeypie great to have that calm, all the relaxing hormones are bound to only be good thing ❤️🌈

i can’t seem to tag Hank? But just wanted to say hi over here, time is flying by, I hope u and LO are doing well?

[Supertrooper101]

@Jadeypie so a calm postive attitude and a 28day cycle, i would say things are definatley looking up for you! About time 🙂
@Westy22 ive been exactly the same the last two days. I cant help but think the worse and that its just a trick or sad game. I just cant shift my mood. Its getting worse the further akong i go. Madness!
Went ok today. Approx 12wks. Got discharged which am abit nervous about. Bleed keeps pissing around....changing each week. Hopefully get some sensible answers or solutions nxt week on the main appointment.
@SnookyPook any movements yet 🙂🙂🙂

[SnookyPook]

@DmcinT 17+3! Can't believe it! @Supertrooper101 I think I've felt some movements occasionally but nothing conclusive or regular yet. With my son I was 19wks before I was sure that's what it was so hopefully all good!

@Supertrooper101 12wks!! That's amazing! And hopefully the official 12wk scan next week will help it to sink in a bit. I'm so sorry that you're still feeling anxious about it all. Have you considered asking for a bit of support from perinatal MH team? I still have moments myself but it is definitely reassuring having a more visible bump now and also thinking there are the beginnings of movements. Just think, you've already got this far. You just have to keep going one day at a time as you have been doing and those weeks will keep moving on forwards. 💕 You're doing so well.

Not sure if it's pregnancy hormones, time of year, both etc but I've been crying about last year's loss today! It just hit me fresh all over again. If anyone wants a proper weep (sometimes cathartic eh?) I've only just come across Taylor Swift's 'Bigger than the whole sky' and my goodness if it isn't about miscarriage then I don't know what it's about. So beautifully poignant. I feel so lucky to be into the second trimester with this little one but the grief for the one I lost just got me hard today. And I was thinking if all had gone to plan I'd have been cuddling a 4 month old and already onto the next phase. And then I felt guilty because if that had worked out, I wouldn't be pregnant with this little one, who I'm sure, once they are here, I won't be able to imagine being without. Anyway... just rambling because I can. I know you guys get it 🙃

Love to you all xxx

[Sez281]

@Supertrooper101 Can't believe you're 12 weeks! Glad the scan went ok but I'm so emailed that you still feel in limbo, especially with the stupid bleed 😣 You've not had any spotting or anything with it have you?

I rang the consultants office this morning. I'm booked in to meet midwife to do chart etc in 2.5 weeks, I'll also get bloods and my consultant will scan me. I assume that's my "12 week scan" even though I'll only be around 11+5? 🤔

@DmcinT Aww congratulations🥰 I love the name! I'm Irish and have never seen it spelt that way, beautiful 💓

@Paws4thought im glad to hear that you're doing as ok (as you can be) I hope the tests go negative for you soon 🙏 x

@Westy22 im so sorry you're going through this anxiety. I know exactly how you feel and there's no logical way to control it. For me I found that getting my bloods done those couple of times felt like I was doing something proactive but realistically it could have gone either way and only made me more anxious. My sister reminded me yesterday that worrying will literally not change the outcome of anything. I need to ask myself how do I want to look back on this if all goes well, I don't want to regret not enjoying it (within reason) so I think I'm going to try to go forward with more of a positive outlook whilst still being very aware that stuff may go wrong but that's beyond our control x

Awww @SnookyPook I've heard of that song (haven't listened to it though) I think it's really good to allow yourself a little cry today. It's ok to be sad about what might and should have been 😢 xx

[Westy22]

Thank you guys ❤️ I've cried twice in work but feel alright now maybe theres something in the air @SnookyPook 🙈 I'm debating ringing my gp and arranging bloods so I can atleast get some clarity on what's happening either way @Sez281 I can't control anything but not knowing isn't helping me at all.

I should take some positivity from you guys really ❤️

[HopeAndStrength]

Thank you for the thread @Sez281 - I can't believe it is March already. So much has happened in the past year. Sending everyone lots of love ❤️

[Supertrooper101]

@Westy22 we may sound postive at times..... but there we were having bloods and scans lol so easy to say it...another level telling yourself to it tho. Do what works for you, what at ur drs like? If you think they will do bloods easy enough then i dont see the problem. Tell them your aniexty and they may well refer you for an early scan too. Its so hard after a mmc.. has your fella come round a little?
@Sez281 i think over here those scans are done between 11&14 wks so yours should be fine. Do you think that will be your dating one though, or just one extra as you have gone private? How do you feel about her doing it? Is it next week you have that nipt?
@SnookyPook thanks for that, you do have some kind words of wisdom....but do you ever follow your own advise??? Haha

[Westy22]

Well I spoke to the receptionist who was kind but said I need to register with midwife 😩 who will then be able to look at getting me some support to deal with anxiety and maybe bloods however she said If I don't feel like I get anywhere with them to ring back and they will book me in with gp to arrange bloods. She tried to congratulate me and i was like "please dont im not at that point" 🙈 I feel calmer this evening but I do feel like my breast pain has subsided with just some sensitivity left. I guess only time will tell, felt really uncomfortable before but think I was full of gas 🙈 @Supertrooper101

I guess I can't control it, I need to mentally prepare myself for the worst and try and hope for the best. OH knows I've had a very bad anxious day as I messaged him but I've come home and he's literally not mentioned it 🙈 want to strangle him 🤣

Hope your feeling more positive to reach 12 weeks 💗 it's a massive milestone!!.

[Supertrooper101]

@Westy22 your midwife can arrange the councilling omce your booked in, but they wont do hcg levels. They do stuff like iron sti's full blood count. Ring your gp back and say what the previous one said and get some booked in. They offered, i would take it lol i dont know why they dont state that trapped gas and constipation is THE main sympton lol it is soooo uncomfatable lol is this how ur oh normally is on other situations too? I know how you feel, i felt alone in all of this too. Probably why ive seeked extra appointments etc just to keep me sane and talk to someone lol

[Sez281]

@Westy22 I sometimes feel sorry for our OH's.. they're damned if they do say something and damned if they don't🙈. I know it must be very hard living with me at the moment! 😂 I agree with @Supertrooper101 though, get booked it so she can arrange it. It won't jinx anything, but might make you feel a bit more in control 🤞

@Supertrooper101 I've the Nipt bloods & scan on the 19th where I'll be 10+5 and the booking appointment (and I assume dating scan) the week after. So 11 days till my next scan which feels like a lifetime but will try keep busy 🤷‍♀️ Have you told any of your family or friends yet? That might help make it a bit more real and also will be nice to have more support?

[SnookyPook]

@Supertrooper101

@Westy22 we may sound postive at times..... but there we were having bloods and scans lol so easy to say it...another level telling yourself to it tho. Do what works for you, what at ur drs like? If you think they will do bloods easy enough then i dont see the problem. Tell them your aniexty and they may well refer you for an early scan too. Its so hard after a mmc.. has your fella come round a little?
@Sez281 i think over here those scans are done between 11&14 wks so yours should be fine. Do you think that will be your dating one though, or just one extra as you have gone private? How do you feel about her doing it? Is it next week you have that nipt?
@SnookyPook thanks for that, you do have some kind words of wisdom....but do you ever follow your own advise??? Haha

Haha I definitely try to but with varying degrees of success!!

[DmcinT]

Thanks everyone, it’s so amazing to see so many of us on this journey together, supporting each other, we are all in it together almost a year now which is hard to believe. I’m sure like me, most of u have the anniversary of ‘that scan’ coming up this month, I’m dreading the date and then the date of our D&C 10 days later. Sometimes I feel so guilty for feeling so happy that Mollaí is here when it means my other babies aren’t , I’m trying to rationalise those feelings and get through this next month to be honest.

@Sez281 i can’t remember if I seen ur bfp now but huge congrats 🥳 there’s been so much activity on here over the last month, it’s amazing🥰 Molly was my granny’s name and I’m a teacher & had a student a few years ago who’s parents had spelt it that way (we’re in the Gaeltacht so most names have an Irish spelling/twist to them) once I seen that spelling I loved it, a nice wee twist on an older name.

[Westy22]

Docs have refused bloods and said go to hospital if I think somethings wrong, really dissapointed and I gave her that feedback. Said they have nothing for a month 😑 may just wait a week now and then pay for reassurance scan. Xx

[SnookyPook]

@Westy22 that's really rubbish. I can't see why they would refuse that. Sorry you're not getting great treatment so far. It really p*sses me off that it's always such a lottery what kind of treatment women get in these situations. X