Trying to conceive over 40

[October1979]

Here is a new thread for us girls

Thanks @October1979. Just booking my place in this thread xx

Thanks @October1979. How are you feeling?

@October1979I just read your post on the other thread. You will be ok. The hardest thing in these times is the ability to distract yourself. Once I’ve had the positive, I for some reason don’t test every day.... although I do plenty of underwear inspection!

Thanks@birdbybird I'm ok. I'm distracting myself writing an application for a course x

@October1979 thanks for starting a new thread, I didn’t realise you could runout of space 😂
Sorry it seems like another chemical. TTC over 40 is brutal! You’d think a positive test is job done, but the reality is it’s only the tip of the iceberg.
Are you going to continue to pursue the ivf route? At least they can select the healthy embryos that way and it wouldn’t be this constant egg roulette.

I’m going to do another clear blue weeks tomorrow as I have one left - I’m expecting it to still be 2-3 or have regressed to 1-2. Although I’ve still been doing the one step cheapies as I have so many and they have just stubbornly remained exactly the same for the last 5 days, not forward or backwards

Hello all. Sorry I introduced myself and then disappeared. My Dad has been extremely ill (was already in hospital following an embolism and then had a heart attack in hospital). Looked as if he were definitely dying for a couple of days but has stabilised a bit now. Anyway, I had to come up to be with my mother and try to sort things out. We were taking a break from ttc until the end of June anyway because we are moving house in July. I was really sad about having to stop ttc for a bit but quite glad we did now. Hope everyone is OK. Sorry to hear that you think the tests are fading @October1979 I have not done any really early tests since starting to try but I've had several months when I felt very pregnant for a few days and then it faded and my period came. I was very ill in pregnancy and with both my DC as well as a couple of early losses before DS1 I felt ill in just that way from a week or so before my period so I think it's likely I've been having false starts of this kind too.

@Honey2 I'm sure I remember reading somewhere (maybe in a review?) that those one step ones are a bit rubbish and never get properly dark, or not for absolutely ages.

@kalidasa yes I’ve read lots of poor reviews on the one steps too - I got them as I’m a poas addict and had spent too much on FRER and clear blue 🙈🙈

@October1979 thanks for starting a new thread. After I had my miscarriage last year, I moved my focus to starting a new career, signed onto a course and now I'm a couple of weeks from completing said course and getting ready to move onto the next step of my new career It doesn't make me want a baby any less but it certainly helps lessen the the blow each month when I see a BFN if I have something else to focus on. Good luck with your course! xx

Yes @sabtom it was a good distraction today and good to feel I was doing something productive. Light bleeding has started tonight. So that's it for me this time. @Honey2 good luck with the Clearblue weeks test. I'm rooting for you and sending you positive thoughts. As for me and ivf I'm not going to make any rash decisions. Just let the dust settle and re evaluate. But my track record of MMC and 3 chemicals possibly 4 in just over a year is definitely causing a mind shift x

Thanks for new thread! Marking my place!

@Honey2 ohhh that is a bit tougher then. Well I’m still crossing everything for you. Xxx

@Honey2 In case it wasn’t clear because you aren’t psychic (!) I mean that whole last chance part from your comment on the old thread. No idea why I’m expecting you to read my mind 🤦🏻‍♀️ I blame the sunshine! It’s confused my brain. 🤣

@October1979 I'm really sorry to hear you're update. I was really hoping that wouldn't be the case.

I'm glad your course is distracting you. I've found that helpful over the last year too- that and getting distracted with my day job. Sending love and hugs your way today xx

@Geriatric1234 haha I did actually get what you meant! Thanks. CB weeks was still 2-3 this morning, so I guess the writing is on the wall. (I’m 5+6 today) It’ll be a long wait till Friday!

@October1979 good plan about taking stock and thinking things through. I find one of the hardest things about TTC is that you have limited control over it (and if you haven’t guess already I’m a control freak) so having a ‘plan’ for what’s next is always important for me. Glad you gave your course to focus on - what’s it on? If that’s not too nosey!?

@Littlemiss40andfabulous looks like your our last hope this month! Hope you are feeling ok xx

I’m so sorry @October1979 this is happening again. I still however believe it can work out naturally for you. Chemical pregnancies are so common but it’s a good sign you can get pregnant. It feels like the fertility doctors have an agenda to me. Madness to suggest it won’t happen when test results were normal. Of course the path might be harder but still a chance. I guess it’s a case of what time frame you have in mind and whether you feel ready to move to IVF. Thinking of you today. X

@Honey2 I’m so sorry to hear you’re in limbo at the moment. It’s such a horrible position to be in. Hoping you get some clarity soon. X

Congratulations @Littlemiss40andfabulous Fingers crossed all ok. X

As for me, I’ve finally spoken to my GP after my second chemical pregnancy since Christmas. She was happy to refer me for fertility support. I’m not eligible for IVF but they can offer other investigations and treatments on the nhs. My cycles are usually 50 days plus so Clomid looks likely. Saying that, my DH and I have completely changed our diet. We’re eating mostly Mediterranean so lots of oily fish, nuts and seeds, full fat dairy. I ovulated on day 17 of my cycle last week so I’m actually in my two week wait. Normally I’d be waiting another 2-3 weeks just to ovulate. I can’t be sure but the diet seems to have done something. We’ve also had the odd cheat night with pizza etc. I’m a big believer in the 80/20 rule with diets to keep sane.

I’m not sure how long the referral will take but from what the GP said, fertility services are up and running and not affected by a backlog because of Covid. In the meantime we remain hopeful it will just happen. Xx

Hi everyone hope you are all doing well. Thanks for everyone's support. It has definitely helped.
@kalidasa so sorry your dad is not well. It's so stressful. Especially at this time.
@Honey2 fingers crossed for you. At least they are not going backwards. Let's hope that is a positive sign. I'm a depute head teacher, the new course is one you need to be a head teacher. Still not sure I want to be one, but at least I'll have the option.
@Littlemiss40andfabulous @Catconfusion thanks for your kind words xxx

@October1979 massive respect to all teachers - you guys have the patients of a saint!! I guess a head teacher role would be pretty stressful, but rewarding too. I work in Marketing, which pays well but isn’t very rewarding. I’ve often wondered about re training as a midwife, but I’m not sure the night shifts and pay cut would go down that well with the family 🤣

@October1979 I’m so sorry to hear about the bleeding. But you seem incredibly good at getting pregnant which suggests to me (Obvs I’m now a fertility doctor thanks to Google!) that it’s just a matter of time before you get a sticky bean. Xxx

@Honey2 as you know I’m not an early tester and when I got my BFP in December I tested after AF was 8 days late making me 5weeks and CB digital said 2-3 weeks (I just scrolled back through photos to check date and result!). And CB says it measures from conception, not missed period (pic attached) putting you at 5+ still legitimately in the 2-3 ish bracket. So I’m not sure you are out!! Xx

@Geriatric1234 thanks for that, i know I shouldn’t but (after seeing it on another thread) I actually broke open the CB tests to have a look at the strips - inside there are 3 lines and all 3 need to be dark to hit 3+ both 5+3 and 5+6 looks the same - no darker but no lighter. I have just got to wait abs see! But I think I prefer to consider I’m out and then maybe be surprised if there does happen to be a miracle 😊

This is what the inside looks like FYI...

Oops I labelled those pics wrong - it’s 5+3 it 5+1!

@Honey2 your 5+3 looks darker to me

@October1979 thanks - I totally labelled it wrong it’s actually 5+3 and 5+6, I can see what you mean the later one does look a bit darker on 2 of the lines. I think my hcg may still be creeping up but I’m pretty sure it’s way to slow to be viable. We’ll see. I’m trying to resist buying any more tests 🙈

@Honey2 I agree with @October1979 the 5+3 looks darker. Many women have stated they never got above 2-3weeks on clear blue tests and went onto have very healthy pregnancies. So I wouldn't rule out that your actually progressing nicely. I realise that probably doesn't help with worrying though xx