Fuck you TTC

[painintheholeSIL]

Today should be day one of my period. No sign. We've been ttc dc2 since summer 2018. I don't have any tests in the house. I'm trying not to symptom spot, I haven't told anyone in real life that we're trying.
Our son is almost 4. I'm desperate to give him a sibling. I adore him. He's amazing.

But I am aching to have another baby. People keep asking when we're going to and we just laugh off the questions. They hurt. Every one of them hurts. I suppose I'm just looking for people who understand.

Every single thread I look at in relation to this ends up full of BFPs and I'm just not in the space where I can read those and not feel devastated.

So Fuck you to TTC.
Fuck you to months off slightly delayed periods
Fuck you to every fucker that asks me every time they see me if I have any news
Fuck you to the whole fucking lot of it.

Anyone care to add theirs?

@painintheholeSIL

I would see if you can get a doctors appointment. If you can barely walk that might be something to get checked out to give you some peace of mind and hopefully something to stop the pain.
Hugs to you xx

I hear you all.

Fuck you to being a midwife working in antenatal referrals. Every month seeing women with my LMP dates- except I’ve had one since.

Being able to work out an EDD in your head isn’t always a good thing. And I walk past the scan department every day thinking ‘will it ever be me?’

@Iwouldlikesomecake I’m a midwife too

Fuck you 7th day of flashing smiley when previous 4 cycles have been 2/3 days and then static!!

This is not fun.

Fuck you to period pain and migraine today. I am so sick of all this.

Fucking ovarian cyst or whatever the hell this fucking pain is.

Fuck you to all the random cramps and twinges I get now following a MC

Fuck you for a complete inability to feel happy for other peoples pregnancies

Fuck you to a completely new sense of time and measurement of everything in cycles

@Whiffle77 yep living cycle to cycle, fertile week to fertile week 🙄

Fuck your to AF arriving. Fuck you to the friend who I see weekly that talks about nothing but babies, babies, babies.

Fuck you to my ectopic last year - I'd have had a baby this month.

@wannabebump that’s shit when milestones happen.

Fuck you to my body/temperature chart that says I ovulated on Tuesday cd12 when i didn’t have a positive OPK till that night & all cd13, OH wasn’t home till cd14 & had strong ovulation signs then, wasn’t meant to ovulate till tomorrow, so fuck you for letting me think I was in with a chance this month then moving the goal posts, literally

Fuck you to yet another colleague being pregnant and me being unable to be excited.
Fuck you to being depressed around the due date of my second pregnancy (had a MC).
Fuck you to AF arrivinh yet again.
Fuck you to all the tons of baby and maternity clothes I am storing. Will I ever use them again? 😭😭

Fuck you to family pregnancies
Fuck you to each milestone, especially when you know you have so many more to come!
Fuck you anxiety

Fuck you to being off work poorly with flu and my manager saying on the phone ooo are you sure you're not pregnant. No I'm fucking not and how rude is it to say that?
Fuck you to being poorly when this week is my fertile week but I can't face DTD.
Fuck you to having to try for yet ANOTHER month.
Fuck you to whoever made a month such a fucking long time.

Fuck you to AF who is playing games since Thursday, no real AF since Thursday, just Brown Cm/spotting/only when wiping and BFN.

Either hurry the fuck up you witch or give me my BFP 😫😖

@wannabebump I am in the same situation 😭
Spotting since Sunday night, too early for AF, no real flow and BFN. Just come AF or don’t. The stupid waiting...

I'm with you all. On all the things. It's so fucking sad. AF is going rear her ugly head tomorrow despite taking the 'advice' and 'relaxing' this month. Bullshit.

@Hannahb26 mine is due on Thursday. I know what you mean. I feel so sad.

And fuck you to the "friend" who knows I'm struggling, who presented me with a sideways view of her 16 week bump last Friday. She's only been with the father for a few months and got pregnant first attempt.
She sat and showed me every single picture from her scans so far. Every single detail of the whole pregnancy so far. And she fucking knows. How well she feels and how amazing it all is.
While I died a little bit more inside.😢

Fuck you to the dilemma of realising I have no sanitary products during the TWW and not knowing whether to buy tampons of pregnancy tests at the chemist, and feeling like an idiot if I buy both.

@painintheholeSIL wow she sounds a bit toxic and frenemy... I mean yeah she can tell you and that, but she sounds like she's majorly rubbing it in and has no tact. I would drop her pronto x

Love this fuck you post! Thanks for starting it... So hear goes.
Fuck you to my cousin moaning about being pregnant with twins and being fat, you're so lucky and I would love to be cooking one baby let alone two! She also had 9 abortions before meeting her partner. I'm all for a woman's right to choose but abortions are not contraception.
Fuck you to my MIL who keeps asking her son, when it's her son who seems to be the one with issues and it's making him feel lousy (low sperm due to mumps) 😢)
Fuck you to one of my friends who told me I wouldn't know because I'm not a mum, when I make any comments on pregnancy, childbirth or child rearing. Kinda feeling like cutting her off rn, except she asked me to be MOH 🙄
Fuck you to my psychic who said I would be pregnant by now 🤔 Well that was a lie 🤥😂
Fuck you to my mom who says that I should concentrate on my career before having kids (I own two properties, my dh is very comfortable and I'm setting up my own business) but thanks ma!
Fuck you to everyone putting quotes up on Instagram 'I was incomplete before you came along' 'the best feeling in the world is being a mommy'
✌️&❤️

One more!
Fuck you to the little ovusense sperm tampon thing, I'm literally fishing the fucker out every morning. 🎣🙄
Fuck you very much ❤️

Hi thank you to the OP for setting up this thread it's just what I needed after crying my eyes out this morning over a BFN. Here goes my list
Fuck you to PCOS and being told by the Dr that I can't get gynecological support until I have lost "a substantial amount of weight"
Fuck you to the nausea and cramps I have been getting for a week but still no AF of positive - I wish that AF will just come now and be done
Fuck you to my husbands friend and her baby with daily pictures on Facebook (and thank god for being able to unfollow someone) and the lovely work colleague who is unexpectedly pregnant when I have been trying for 18 months
Fuck you to everyone telling me to not get my hopes up when its what I want so desperately
Fuck you to Mum and sister constantly talking about when will I have a baby
Fuck you to being 38 in 6 weeks
Fuck you to my husband telling me no one is putting pressure on me except myself - yeah he doesn't have a ticking clock going off and I love him but sex can sometimes be hard work and I just want a quickie
And the big Fuck to having to explain every time I don't get alchohol that no I am not pregnant I just don't want a drink today.

That was very theraputic

Fuck you to Af arriving in the middle of the night. On day 33/34
Fuck you Flo telling me I'm late for one day and it's a good time to take a pregnancy test.(while I'm logging said period)
Fuck you to going to bed last night thinking this might finally be the month.
Fuck you disappointment month after month after month.

Fyou to CD38, no AF, high BBT (37C) and what now looks like a chemical pregnancy. After losing a baby last year.

Just so done with this nonsense I actually don't know if I still even want a baby.

Fuck you signs of af and pregnancy being exactly the fucking same!!!!

@Lillybelle05 feeling the same. After 2.5 years trying and 1MC I am at the end of it - mentally drained. My life consists of OPKs, 2 WW, tracking period etc.
And everyone I know had their second and even third. Do I even want to have such a big age gap? I don’t know what to do anymore