TTC after pregnancy loss 32 - the penguin huddle

[ReeReeR]

New thread 🐧🐧🐧

I have accidentally created a thread 33 as well but will delete that!

Thanks for the tag. @VenusStarr thank you. It's definitely is not a nice experience, but I try to stay positive by thinking at least I know we can get pregnant, so hopefully it will happen again. I had quite a bit of pain on one side yesterday, some cramping and back ache, so not too sure what is going on at the moment. My first mc bleed day was 21st of August, so it could be my ovulation. Fingers crossed for everyone x

Thanks for the welcome @Mumlili8 that's great that you got your static smiley and hopefully you've done enough to have a great swimmer waiting for a perfect egg 🤞I'm so sorry to read about your losses, you are an amazing, strong woman and I can't tell you how much I hope you get your rainbow 🌈 will you take aspirin or progesterone from ovulation?

@Alarica I will be doing asprin from bfp and progesterone pessaries, but progesterone cream from when FF tells me I definitely ovulated. Sometimes I get a really strong lh surge but don't ovulate and my body goes for it again a few days later but if I do progesterone to early it will stop the second lh surge in its tracks and throws me into an anovulation cycle which throws my cycle out by almost a week. So I wait until atleast 3dpo to start cream. Do you chart or opk?

@Mumlili8 I've been using clearblue digitals forever. I haven't temped in the past- didn't think I'd be any good at it 😂 but I got an early birthday present of an Ava bracelet and started using it on Monday so hopefully that will help too 🤞
I'm thinking about starting back on the baby aspirin. It was recommended to me by a fertility specialist but she said to take it all the time, maybe due to my age though. Do you know why they said only after BFP?
That's interesting about the progesterone. I think I'll have mine tested again if I get a clearer picture of ovulation from the temping. I think "day 21" can be different for everyone. What do you think?

@Alarica I think the aspirin thing for me is because I don't have any clotting issues according to my test results. Rmc doctor said she doesn't believe it will make any difference for me but if I feel I want to try it then she sees no harm. I have my progesterone tested day 19 because I have a 25 - 26 day cycle. I've been reviewing my charts for the last 6 months and it seems that I don't ovulate until 2 days after a positive opk, so I usually get a positive on cd10 but don't get a temp rise till cd13 so my luteal phase is only 12 days so I try to get my progesterone as high as I can as soon as I can now. I really want one of those ava bracelets or the other one that you wear vaginally but I can't seem to convince DH that it's a good investment. Let me know how you get on with it x

Thanks for sharing @Mumlili8 that's all really interesting.
If it helps convince your DH, Ava has a really good resale value so if you don't feel it's useful after a while they are easy to get rid off. I couldn't get one on eBay- sold out!! Someone on an Ava thread was selling a brand new one but unfortunately I had already ordered mine.

Ava Fertility Bracelet (feedback, reviews?) www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/3146704-ava-fertility-bracelet-feedback-reviews

Does anyone know when ovulation and first period is after mc? I started with bleeding and didn't get red for about 1.5 weeks. I didn't lose the sac for 2.5 weeks after the bleeding started. Im just wondering when to expect everything to get back to normal again.

I did a pregnancy test yesterday and it's still showing a strong positive line.

@Mumlili8 thank you for tagging me. I might be in the wrong thread now since we are not TTC but started donor egg process. But would like to stay here for a while if you don't mind.

I'm 43
DD is 2 and conceived with IUI in 2016
3 miscarriages between May 2018-July 2019. 2 of them were from fertility treatments, IUIs and IVFs, and last MC was natural conception, first time ever but sadly it ended at almost 7 weeks. 2nd early scan showed an enlarged yolk sac and 2 days later, I miscarried. I asked my doc about it and she said enlarged yolk sac generally are bad news, typically to do with xhromosal abnormalities

Anyway, Went to EPU on Wednesday for the last time to repeat HCG and it dropped down to 14. I was discharged and no hysteroscopy needed.
In the meantime, our donor is going through her stims and egg collection is now confirmed for Monday! I'm beyond nervous and excited! We haven't been told how many she has and will only be told on collection day. Believe it's a standard procedure for DE process. We're flying home this weekend, seeing my doc on Monday morning to repeat HCG, scan and outline a plan for FET in October! I can't begin to tell you how I feel! A mixture of everything! One minute I was dealing with the miscarriage and next we're almost ready for transfer. 1 embryo will be then biopsied and PGT-a tested and the rest put on ice. I'm just hoping there will be a few 5 day blastocysts!

Oh wow @Russkispy that really is very exciting!! Keeping everything crossed for lots of lovely blastocysts 🤞
I think it can vary from person to person @nicola18737 I went from three and a half weeks of bleeding that just about stopped before a whopper of an AF started. I can't be sure about OV as hpt was still faintly positive until the week before AF.

That’s nice @nicola18737 - something to look forward to!

Good luck with your scan @Pop1234 I can understand it’s a nervous time for you but fingers crossed this is your 🌈

CD1 for me!

Hope everyone else is ok

Consultant appointment today, feeling so sick at the thought of going back into that hospital where I had that EMCS and so scared by not actually getting any answers either.

@nicola18737 I think it really varies from woman to woman, especially at how it was managed too. For me, following a ERPC, my ovulation was delayed by a week so my cycle was only a week longer. But I know for some women they don't ovulate that first cycle.

@Russkispy I think it makes sense for you to stay here if this is where you want to talk about it all! Keeping my fingers crossed that this all goes well!

Yes FX for them to stay about @Mumlili8 !

@ReeReeR hoping this is an easy AF for you.

Thank you for the tag. I hope this quick update brings hope rather than upsets anyone. I'm now 7+5 and have had 2 early scans which looked good. Pregnancy after 3 losses is hard but I'm grateful every day to be experiencing it.

@Russkispy Exciting that things are moving forward quickly with your donor egg cycle!

I hope everyone is doing well and gets their BFPs before long.

@TinyPaws congratulations! No that doesn't upset me, it makes me happy. What upsets me is seeing bad news.

Thanks folks for the replies re ovulation after mc. I've been to docs today and she has prescribed me high dose folic acid. She said she thinks that my period will be 4 weeks from when I physically passed the sac, as that is when the HCG starts dropping dramatically.

I think I am going to buy an Ava bracelet in the meantime. Conception is all I can think about so at least it'll give me something to look at everyday. It's a shame it cant test for hcg as well. It's horrible doing pregnancy tests and it's being positive, but that being bad news.

Yeah I do totally appreciate that @nicola18737 - i remember being the same when testing. Weirdly though I was still getting positives when I ovulated post MC. So not sure if a total drop in HCG is needed to ovulate

Thank you for creating a new thread

Hope everyone is okay

Almost a month since I had a D&C for my miscarriage (occurred 26th July ) and no period as yet

But I'm temping

However - I'm starting to wonder if I should just give my mind and my body a break

Also - I'm not sure if I'm 100% happy with my marriage at the moment

We had a lovely summer , kids have gone back to school , I'm back at work and we've just reverted to this couple that don't really speak

Not sure what's going on

So I'll be watching the group , but you may not hear much from me until I figured out life 😕

Onwards and upwards

Autumn is here , the afternoons will get darker now - gotta keep my chin up otherwise I'll consume myself with depression

@TwittleBee I hope that the appointment with the consultant gives you some answers and goes as well as it can do. DH and I had to attend a similar appointment and the only thing that I remember really trying to hold on to from that meeting was that we did not need to think of all of the questions at the meeting. It is still the hospital's responsibility to answer any question that you have at a later date, no matter when you think of it. We also tried to ask as many open questions as we could. I felt that being in the hospital with people saying 'please do ask us any questions' wasn't actually that helpful as we are not medical professionals, we can't understand the technical terms and so we might not be able to formulate the right questions. It is still also a hospital responsibility to give you all of the relevant information in language that makes sense to you, and that process doesn't all have to take place in the meeting either. I am sending you lots of thoughts of strength for the meeting.

@ReeReeR yes my cycles have been really irregular - shortest was 22 days and longest was 34. The 34-day cycle was straight after the 22 day cycle so of course I got my hopes up when my period was late. I hope that this AF is ok for you.

@Rumi1 yes I agree about sometimes your body and mind need a break. I also find temping quite stressful. I think it is because you have to do it first thing in the morning, and so it is always the first thing that you think of in the morning. That kind of sets the tone for the day and sometimes I would rather not have TTC being the first thing that I think about.

I am coming up to my TWW and am already thinking of how I will cheer myself up when AF arrives. I am thinking that I will book myself a haircut, and possibly a reflexology massage. Does anyone else have any ways of cheering themselves up in these kind of times?

Hi @nicola18737 I started using my new Ava on Monday and really like it already. I don't think I could manage manual temping. Apparently it takes 3 months to get to know you properly.
If you want £20 off please use my discount

avawomen.ref-r.com/c/i/12607/36529438

click on the link above and then type in AVABFF18 at checkout.
Best of luck x

@Rumi1 oh I'm sorry to hear things aren't going great with your husband. Do you think that maybe you need time for just yourselves to remember what made you fall in love in the first place?

@Alarica thank you but I've already ordered. I'm really excited. How long did yours take to come?

@nicola18737 I ordered on Tuesday and it arrived on Friday, unfortunately nobody was home to sign for it so they delivered again on Monday. Looking forward to sharing the experience

Thanks @TwittleBee

Pleased things are going well for you @TinyPaws

@Rumi1 I can relate on the marriage front as I don’t feel DH and I are one at the moment. Example: he called me at lunchtime to ask how I am as I was upset last night. That was nice but he told me about his plans to see his friend tonight, be out early tomorrow as he has things to do and then be out early on a Sunday too. So thanks for calling me to tell me I’m on my own this weekend. He thought he was being considerate but it might have occurred to him I didn’t want to be alone... I don’t feel like TTC in a way but then we have days like this and might be fine this week. Who knows

@JuniperAndRose Your cycles are not so bad. They are still probably within normal range but 22 days is short. Mine seem to be averaging about 29-30 days so hopefully they settle soon.

Just went back to my favourite gym glass since before my pregnancy and was faced with a couple of bumps which almost ruined it for me!

I think I’m tired

Do Ava bracelets just track temp?

Hi @JuniperAndRose sorry AF was messing with your head, it's so hard not to get your hopes up. In terms of cheering yourself up, I found reiki really good- so relaxing and calming and time just for me and my wellbeing. Unfortunately my reiki therapist is on a break for the foreseeable future so I'm looking for an alternative 🤞

Hi @ReeReeR that must have been really tough at the gym. I've read about your losses and it amazes me how well you seem to be coping. I hope you get some together time with your DH soon, you deserve a lot of love.
The Ava tracks a number of things and has some magical algorithms for predicting OV!! Apparently it takes 3 months to get to know your body but after that you don't need OPKs anymore. I got it for the temping but I find the other stats interesting to follow too.

Thanks @Alarica I imagine it would be good for temping. I couldn’t get the hang of temping at all as I kept forgetting to do it first thing or forgot the temp.

Also the instructor at the end of the class said she hadn’t seen me for a while so I told her I’d been off on mat leave etc so she promptly congratulated me but then I told her I’d lost the baby (no other detail) but she was like it’s ok, I’ve had miscarriages, just keep coming... I’m sure she was trying to help / didn’t know what to say

I’ve just done two gym classes though so I’m probably tired and grumpy so I think good and bed for me! Body combat was great though 😬

Hope everyone has relaxing weekends