TTC after pregnancy loss: We're nervous, we're hopeful, we're checking all the charts and taking all the vits!

[BertieBotts]

Welcome back all and welcome new posters.

I'm so sorry if you do get your period unicorns, hope you won't.

Thanks everyone for the pep talk. It's just that it's my BEST friend who's about to move continents and I know this has the potential to drive a wedge right between us if I don't get pregnant in the next 8 months. The way she said it was accidental hit me 😔

Driving myself crazy symptom spotting! Had cramps yesterday (implantation??) and today I'm sooooo tired!!! Pregnant?? Or more likely stomach ache from too much chocolate and tired from too much Tesco??!

Guess what we've just done?! Booked flights and hotel in New York for Feb half term! It has really lifted my spirits!

Hi all, will catch up on thread in a mo.

Hello to the newbies, sorry you find yourself here.

Sorry to anyone struggling with af's or shit aftercare (@Flatwhite31 ) but NY sounds amazing.

I finished my first af since ERPC on Tuesday & did my first OPK today, and I think I'll ovulate in the next few days (hopefully!).

I think I'm finally turning a corner after two consecutive mc's, and thinking positively again.
I'm still having the occasional bad day, but they're fewer now.

Glad you're feeling more positive @yellowfrontdoor. How long did you wait between ERPC and AF? X

@Flatwhite31 NINE LONG WEEKS!

My cycles have always been around the 40-50 day mark but it was a hard wait. I nearly drove myself mad with pregnancy tests etc, and took myself to the doctors with what turned out to be horrendous ovulation pain a few weeks ago. Wish I'd forced myself to dtd!
Last time I got pg straightaway with no period so to wait this long was hard, mentally it was really tough.

I could've written some of your posts Flat a few weeks ago, but honestly, I've found time to be the best healer.

@flat - NYC is amazing! If you've not been before I have some great recommendations (my cousin used to live there and she is v trendy, think gossip girl style!)

Sorry everyone is here and that some are feeling hopeless. There really should be more support after MC. I was just handed a leaflet riddled with spelling mistakes!!

Great to hear some people are starting to try to move forwards and try again.

@Flatwhite that sounds amazing

Well I'm here at 12dpo and just wishing AF appears because I seriously can't take any more fake squinty lines. I think next month I'm just going to get some ovulation strips, and a twin pack of FRERs and just wait it out. I am so done with these stupid strips. So. Done.

@UnicornsandRainbows1 how many dpo are you now? Have you tried a FRER? I wasted so many the last few cycles I understand wanting to wait.

@Flatwhite31 New York will be fab! Is it your first time? Nice to have something to look forward to.

Well cd6 here of cycle 5 post mc and I'm okay ish. Had a cry last night because I started thinking about Christmas without my baby (EDD was 10 December) and I'm frustrated/ worried that I haven't managed to get pregnant again yet. However I've started doing more yoga again and trying to eat healthier. I'm taking all my vitamins. Trying not to think something's wrong - I fell on cycle 3 last time.

I also treated myself to a mani pedi yesterday and (it's not for everyone and feel free to judge) I got my frown lines Botoxed on Friday! I have chickened out a few times before but last cycle I promised myself if I wasnt pregnant id do it. Takes 2 weeks to see results but I'm excited to not look like a grumpy old lady 👵🏼

Unicorn - what make are you using? Can you get a frer?

Flat - I agree, NY will be fabulous! Very jealous. We have family there so also can give recommendations. It will help you a lot too.

@TheGrumpySquirrel I'm 12dpo so maybe it's just early and I'm being an idiot. I figured a test is a test. How wrong I am.

@Ekphrasis One Step (10mui ones). Didn't have a problem with the cassette ones last time but the strips are out of this world on annoying me

I'm going to have to fork out for a FRER aren't I? -__-

I haven't been on much as been feeling really down and struggling to cope with the mc, and feeling pathetic as I was only 5.5 weeks, and its been 3 and a half months.

Getting frustrated with DP too as he's always too knackered for sex. Got an almost positive OPK yesterday and my pattern would be that the positive would be for today and I know there's no way he'll be up for it (especially as he has ED which is worse when he's tired so he just avoids the issues).

@voxnihili

and feeling pathetic as I was only 5.5 weeks, and its been 3 and a half months.

You also grew a 5.5 week baby and that's amazing. Don't feel pathetic for the length of time you had them for; every day you had them longer than the day before. And 3 and a half months is what, roughly 14 weeks or so? That's such a small amount of time to get over a horrible, horrible situation.

Be kind to yourself and take it easy

I only ask as I've found the one step 10 ones rubbish. They were picking up a faintest of lines at 10 dpo but only I could see it and I thought it was my imagination. The frer was much better, though still faint, was clearly a line. The one step actually have compared in darkness to a boots cheapie which is 25 miu. Sainsbury's are also very sensitive but can confuse as they look thin and are blue . I've noticed you have to look at them after 5 mins, any longer and it just looks like an evap. If there's a line, it's a line.

These were my day 11, frer and Sainsbury's (about £3.50) one step was inconclusive.

vox I felt more upset about my 4+5 mc than my much further along one. It was a miscarriage and you have every right to feel sad. I'm still not over it 4 mos on. It felt so cruel.

Is there any way you can get some support? Could you try phoning the mc association?

But really unicorn, you're right, early testing isn't always helpful.

@Ekphrasis That's pretty much it. I can (vaugely) see it but I'm not sure if it's a shadow or if it's because I'm just seeing what I want to see maybe. I'm just torturing myself because that seems super fun to do!

Well I have everything crossed for you!

Hey folks. Been missing a while as stated new job this week. Predictably period arrived on day 2 of new job after almost 5 weeks post erpc. Felt suprisngly ok about it.

However now we think about trying again and although I desperately want a baby I have zero interest in sex. I think the last time we dtd was when I conceived (or that cycle anyway). I've bought some ov sticks but never used them so need a crash course in those too please?!

Should have added - we are giving it until the new year and then we will be back for ivf again.

fingers crossed for you 🦄!

Grumpy - I want Botox too! How did you find a clinic that you trusted? Was it expensive? No judgement here!

Thank you @coastalchick @TheGrumpySquirrel and @Ekphrasis! Some recommendations would be fab. I've been before, but that was over 11 years ago, and I was too young (20) to properly appreciate it! My DH has never been. It has given us a bit of a boost after such a crap time.

TMI alert, but we have DTD twice since my ERPC. The first time was fine with no pain, although I cried afterwards! Today, however, has been a different story. We had to stop, as about 5-10 mins in I started getting bad pelvic pain. It's still sore now. Poor DH keeps worrying he has hurt me! What on earth could this be?!