TTC after pregnancy loss: We're nervous, we're hopeful, we're checking all the charts and taking all the vits!

[BertieBotts]

Welcome back all and welcome new posters.

Went to MIL2B's today and just sobbed all over her. Needed to get out the house and talk to someone. Have cancelled going to a friend's tonight though - some other girls going who don't know about the MC and I don't want them to as one of them might let slip to her husband who knows loads of people I know, including my evil ex.

Thought I'd stopped bleeding but around twice a day there is some brown blood when I wipe. Just so so sick of this now and want to move forwards and try again but my stupid fat horrid body is stopping me.

I literally hate myself, my life and the world right now. Stop, I want to get off.

Turquoise think I'm going to go back to temping even though it's a massive faff (maybe vaginal temping will be less annoying? I hate holding the thing in my mouth and trying to keep still) because after 6 days of positive OPK last cycle I'm still not sure if/when I ovulated. I do like FF approach and I've paid for 3 months of it so might as well.

flat, that's so beautiful and honest. It's so meaningful when people are brave enough to open their hearts like you have.

I haven't been on here much, trying not to think about ttc this month but had a bfn this morning as I was getting excited about high temps! Af due Friday. Love to all.

Hello ladies, was recommended this thread.
I had a mc 6days ago at 12+5 after having my 12 week scan and having a mmc of Baby passing away at 9+5 :( not currently ttc. I'm pretty put off as i was in so much pain and in Spain so couldn't really go to a hosp as easy as uk.
Sorry for your losses everyone xxx
Sorry to see alot of familiar names :(
costal I'm so sorry i hadn't been on since i was told about my mmc so had no idea you was going through this too, did you find out at your scan? Xx

@BlueeSpottyTiger hello again, lovely. I forgot to ask whether you've been looking after yourself with water and foods with iron (the amount of times I've said this recently). Make sure you look after yourself even when you think you're a bit stronger.

I'm really sorry you're here too

Hi @BlueeSpottyTiger. So sorry you are joining us on this thread. How are you feeling now? Xx

Bluespottytiger I'm so so sorry. I remember you from the other thread of course. Think you got your bfp a couple of weeks before me. Have no useful words, just so sorry this has happened to you. Mine was lost at 5 weeks so I don't want to compare to what you're going though, I know for every day and week further along the pregnancy is, the loss must be that much harder to bear. Lots of lovely people here who understand xx

Why do you have to keep still Grumpy? I look at my phone while I temp usually as I need to enter the number into fertility friend anyway. Or I just do it while half asleep and continue to doze. I replaced my thermometer because the battery was dying and the old one took about 10 seconds whereas the new one takes 2-3 seconds and it does make a big difference, but I think the faster one is less accurate. I've noticed if it feels cold, I've got to suck it to warm it up for a bit first otherwise it reports a clearly wrong low temperature.

Flatwhite I got pelvic floor pain on and off after my miscarriages and I mentioned it to my doctor and she said yes, that's normal.

Welcome Bluespottytiger and sorry to hear about your miscarriage.

So sorry @BlueeSpottyTiger  I was in Spain when it happened as well (well I started spotting there) "luckily" I was able to find a local EPU who scanned me - I then got on the next flight home and the MC itself happened in uk but given my experience I think I'd rather have stayed in the Spanish hospital. They told me that if I'd been staying longer (I was due to leave next day anyway) they'd have done the ERPC for me and genetic testing as standard.

@BertieBotts my thermometer takes like 2 minutes to get a reading! I find it uncomfortable to hold it under my tongue for that long.

STILL getting BFP. It's faint, but it's there, and you don't have to squint loads to see it. So sick of this taking so long! Most people seem to get their BFN after two weeks. I had my ERPC 3 weeks ago tomorrow .

Flat my bfn took 4 weeks. Don't worry. It is what it is xx

Thanks @beanhunter. I'm just being impatient!

Read back a week flat - o was too. However now period has arrived I don't feel like that anymore.

@Flatwhite31 I read in an NHS leaflet that it can take anywhere from 9 days to 6 weeks to get a BFN after an ERPC. However the nurse told me when I was discharged to take a test after 3 weeks and call them if it was still positive so they could arrange another scan to check that there was no tissue left behind. but if it is getting more and more feint then it sounds like everything is ok but just being on the longer side of things. Maybe give them a call if it goes on for another week?

Welcome tiger - so sorry for what you're going through 💙

Grumpy - my thermometer takes about ten seconds and it was very cheap from eBay I think

flat lovely words a few pages back, well done for putting it all out there. And my bfn came back three weeks after my medical management. But it's a massive pain waiting for it...

Turquoise I am also spending stupid money on ubiquitous...am hoping I can throw money at the problem and buy myself a bfp.

Blue I'm sorry your on here. Mmc really is so very cruel indeed. The mixture of feelings after and being let down by your body is so hard

2 minutes!! That's annoying. So yeah either do it when you're still dozing I suppose or buy a new one

I'm experiencing this strangely ravenous hunger at all times but sitting on my hands and not testing because I'm only 10dpo and I only have one test left but I'm tempted to try at the weekend... I've been doing lots of positive thinking/thoughts become things stuff like going and looking through BFP galleries, reading my old pregnancy book up to week 3, etc, just in case surrounding myself in that stuff might help but who knows.

You're better than me Bertie! I always end up giving in to doing a test!

Ok I think that was an exaggeration it maybe is up to a minute, keeping still makes it settle faster.

Bertie well done on the self control. I hate seeing BFNs but cannot stop myself from testing early. I'm determined not to waste any more FRER and just use IC this cycle until I see a line.

Got everything crossed for you Bertie 🤞

Does anyone mind if I join? Although I'm not really sure if I belong here as i conceived from what I thought was a successful ivf cycle.
I had a scan at 6+3 and then another one a week later. There was just an empty sac, no baby or heartbeat.
I opted for medical management which was a week ago today. My bleeding has virtually stopped now and I stupidly did a pregnancy test this morning as it felt like my ovaries were starting to work again but I still got a very strong bfp. After reading your posts I realise now that hcg levels can take several weeks to come down so my body was obviously playing tricks on me.
Does anyone know if hcg levels still come down even if the bleeding has stopped? I have to do another pregnancy test in 2 weeks and contact the hospital if still showing a positive test so they can do further tests for possible retained tissue.
It just seems a very long drawn out process and I know I have to be patient but it's so hard.
Sorry for the long post.

zigzag you are most welcome here, although I'm sorry of course that you are. This thread is for people ttc after loss, and it doesn't matter what that is and after however you got pregnant. There are so many of us in different Personal situations but we are all in the same boat that the loss of a baby at any stage is just gut wrenching.
I had medical management at 10 weeks and it took almost 3 weeks for a negative test to show. My bleeding had stopped but I was still getting bfp. Think it can take a while for hormones to settle. Are you thinking you'll want to try again straight away? Will you have another round of ivf?

Hi everyone. Thanks for all the info re BFP after ERPC. Much appreciated.

I came home in tears today. Got a child in my class in care whose birth parents don't give a shit. I was so close to tears for this poor child whose parents have damaged him and selfishly for me and DH, who so wanted and loved this baby, yet it was torn away from us while these horrible people treat their child so badly. It's just awful. What a world we live in at times .

@zigzag I am almost 2 weeks post tablets and only just showing a BFN - it is different for everyone and hopefully you'll get yours soon.

@flatwhite31 - I totally hear you. There are SO many people who don't give a shit about their kids yet can pop them out like smarties. It is just not fair. I think, sadly, when we were kids we were brought up in a bit of a Disney like way - to believe that life is fair and that if we are good people, then we will be ok. Sadly life isn't like that and good people suffer a lot of the time.

Went back to work today and coped ok. Until just after 5 when someone handed me a card which had "It's a girl!" written on it for someone in our department who's partner has just had a baby girl on Sunday. I lost it and fled into the toilets crying. This person obviously didn't know and was mortified when I told them but it just sucks.

@Zigzag99 so sorry for your loss. I'm still getting a BFP (faint, but still obvious IYSWIM) nearly 3 weeks after ERPC. I had a mmc at 12 weeks though, so my hormone levels were probably quite high.