TTC after MC#6 - the lucky one for all of us!

[Romeolovesjuliet]

New thread. Hoping for lots of lovely BFPs over the coming weeks

Any news this morning lilbirdie? fingers crossed for you.

Sorry to see you here wait and sorry to hear your story.

First and only time I will be happy to get a bfn! Got my first bfn since surgery this morning. Feel like I've rolled a 6 to start and now we can get on with ttc. Now to start on the opk's - looking forward to a day where I don't feel the need to poas. Hope this journey isn't too long...

Good news on first bfn tft, a fresh start x

birdie sorry about bfn...thats the problem with those strip hpts...as they are extra sensitive, the results should be disregarded after the 10 minute window, as we always have a very small amount of hcg on our systems anyway, so if you look at the result after a long time...it could show a detection of hcg that isnt a bfp, only the eventual detection of our normal levels. Sucks though as I think everyone has done that at some point...looking at it later in hope of a delayed bfp!
That's why they can only make pg test 'just so' sensitive...any more sensitive to hcg then we would all be getting bfp's everyday - even if 'not' pg!

Hope that makes sense xxx

Oh sorry lilbirdie, I cross posted with you. Sorry to hear it's a bfn.

Lilbirdie so sorry for BFN, enjoy the wine while you are away

Paws I know what you mean! I wouldn’t wish a mc on anyone – but it would make my life easier. We saw her and she isn’t showing yet so DP just keeps saying I’ll be huge and pregnant by the time she pops hers out and I won’t care….I hope he is right. Good luck with eod!

Tftpoo congrats on the BFN!!!

mummy thank you

tftpoo congrats on the bfn I had a suspected ectopic last year but I mc and didn't have surgery remember feeling so pleased to see a bfn it's a fresh start for you hope you get a bfp soon

paws thanks that really explains it! I'm making a little pact with myself now no more early testing or looking at results out of the correct time span

So ladies I'm going to try not to get to Down thinking the spotting I had was late ov maybe so I think I will invest in some opk as I've never used them and also I've just read a book called the secret which teaches you to think positively and it's really helped with ttc and dealing with the mc'a I've had

hi ladies, hope you are all ok? I've not been on here for a while as taking a break from ttc and mumsnet but just want to ask a question if you don't mind...did your cycle length change after mc? not the Wtf cycle as it's weird I know but the first proper cycle after that? Just have no idea when to expect af and it's quite annoying. I'm on cd27 today, I used to have short cycles 23-25 days before mc so just wondering if I'm now having longer cycles or if it will just take a while to settle. Just wish af would arrive now as having really bad pms, on the verge of tears all week and think it will be a relief when it actually shows up. No sign as yet though as I used to have spotting as well about 3-5 days before af but have none.

I'm happy to have a longer cycle, with no spotting as gives me a longer LP but it's more the unpredictability of this cycle that's getting to me. Can you tell me if/how your cycles changed after mc?

birdie so sorry hun you know them stick gave me a flase positive as well that's so strange mine was like that as clear as day even though ones before were negative I got all my hopes up as well :( defo deserve a few wines I'm off out Saturday night first to!e since Xmas. Little worried as my eldest whis 5 won't settle without me the only one she settled for is my mum but DH is having none of it and he wants both his DD's here I know she's going to be so distressed completely ruined it now :(. Think I'll give it until 9 then if she's still unsettled come home

,mamma lovely to see you again hun. I'm on CD 31 here in my wtf cycle no sign of AF yetr knowing my luck will be Saturday night. Sorry not very helpful but mine are also like clockwork. Other than AF worries how have you been?

paws mc is so sad for anyone and when we hear about it makes us nextra sad as we know what there going through. :(. Totally agree with them tests happened to me am few days ago got !y hopes upmso high just to be slapped back down to earth

tft yay your body is finally getting back to normal soon you will have you bfp positive again

Nothing new here still no sign of AF CD 31 in wft cycle scared of wearing my white jeans. Bfn' s now all the time love peeing on a stick me just wanna make sure before i go out drinking saturday night. Me and other half been arguing loads loads this week. First night out in months and I know my DD wont settle I can understand how he wants her and has got treats DVDs etc but I've never left her with him before cause were normally out together I can see my night out becoming a disaster

Hi keys, thanks yes I'm doing ok. Just feeling really hormonal and like you I'm out on friday night but can't consider an outfit as yet as no idea when af is going to show! My Wtf cycle was exactly a month since my d&c, exact same date the next month! So strange. Just would love to know when af is coming...its quite unnerving, I hate the unknown!

I was doing fab until pms kicked in but no af showing....hormones are raging now after feeling so happy and calm for the last few weeks! Sucks being a woman really!!!!! How are you keeping?

mamamma my cycles always take about 6 months to get back to normal they are usually longer for a while

keys aww that's a shame but I see what you mean there is no way you can relax if you know your little one is distressed and with all this ttc stuff I'm sure you could do with a bit of fun FX that you manage to stay out without having to go home

I am doing really well now thanks hun I went I was all over the place. Got an appointment next Wednesday to look into miscarriages etc so that will be emotional especially being outside the epu and anti natal i have to wait a little insensitive I think.
Is 5here a chance you could be pg hun? ,always worth takimg a test if AF aint shown up yet?

birdie oh I hope so I have a feeling she's going to be a nightmare shes already sobbing tonight because she don't want me to go. :( I a! Going to ask !y dad to pick me up at 10 just because I can't stomach the hangover either I suffer from depression thee next day when hungover spo I tend to not go out but these are new friends from DD's school and I really don't want to be discluded I must make the effort I'm such an unsociable person pmsl

evening all,

Sorry I've not been on here for a few days, work has been intense. A good distraction in some ways from the 2ww though!

Disney sorry to hear about your grandma, hope you are doing ok.

keys that is so awful about your friend and her baby - there are no words really. I cannot imagine the heartbreak, they are in my thoughts. Sorry that AF is being elusive. I hope you get your night out, try and enjoy it! I cant cope with drinking/hangovers anymore - must be getting old!

mamma welcome back. My cycles have definitely changed since MC but gotten shorter - I used to be around the 30-32 day mark. Since MC its been 27/28 days. I think its my LP that has shortened though.

lilbirdie sorry for the bfn

tft that's great that things are getting back to normal for you.

paws I don't blame you for how you felt about your neighbour. It just goes to show how common MC is though.

hope everyone else is doing ok.

7DPO here - symptom spotting like a crazy fool as usual. Have had backache for days, sore boobs and then some sharp right sided abdo pain this evening. Hmmmm. Temperature still up but rocky - my temps are so inaccurate due to crap sleeping and I'm sure I must mouth breathe! I really want to POAS but trying very hard to stop myself (as clearly stupidly early). Ugh, I hate the 2ww! I think I could forget about it if I didn't feel like crap with backache/cramps- I just feel really paranoid that it feels like AF is on its way, panic starts to set in. Bit pointless at this point though - what's done is done (or not done as the case may be!!)

drifting I know what you mean about symptom spotting and then knowing AF is on way and trying to work out dates and trying to work out when ovulated etc etc I can never shut off when i go to sleep got days and date's going on all around in my head. I test with the cheaps pg test everyday always bfn except one last Saturday which came out positive like birdies so I'm not greatly trusting them right now. Took a superdrug one yesterday complelety negative so I'm really am waiting for AF to hit now probably be next weekend as I ovulated Monday was late ovulation and where I had been DTD so much my body was just knackered so left DTD for a few days so unless the swimmers hung around there's no chance of me being pg this month. For the best this month as me and OH are really not getting on right now. :( wrong time to get a bfp.

Thanks ladies, so I will probably expect longer cycles for a while at least. I suppose that's not a bad thing it's just that I prefer to know when it's coming! Oh well nothing I can do. Keys no I'm not pg did a test just in case and we haven't really been actively ttc. I will just have to find some patience and make sure I'm prepared wherever I go for af to show up!!! Of course it will happen on my night out on fri though....such is life!!!!

Thank you for your advice ladies. Please stay strong, it's such a rollercoaster. I will be back to check on you all soon. Good luck! X

Can I join please? Sorry for your losses. You seem like a lovely bunch and it would be great to have a place where I can be honest (Paws, I understand that feeling totally).
I had a MMC at the end of March, totally healthy scan with heartbeat at 10 weeks, then at the 12 week scan the baby had hardly grown and its heartbeat had stopped. It must have died a couple of days after my previous scan.
I only ever had fairly mild symptoms but they disappeared at around 11 weeks, however lots of people say this is normal as you get to the 12 week mark so I wasn't really worried. MC came a a huge shock.
I wanted to ttc straight away but I continued bleeding and when I finally went back to my doctor she found I had an ovarian cyst. After almost three months of waiting for that to bugger off I have now got the all clear.
Currently waiting for my period and then I will be ttc like a maniac to make up for this lost time.

Hello monkey. Sorry for your loss. You're right, everyone here is lovely. They have been so patient with me over the last week or so with all my random questions about ttc.

Today's worryies/questions are about the luteal phase and supplements. I have been reading (dangerous I know) about short LP and trouble conceiving. I ov on day 19 and have a 28-29 day cycle so a 9-10 day LP. I know that isn't too short and I have conceived twice before (one mc) but now I'm worried about it. I've also heard about taking a low dose aspirin and vitamin b to aid conception/reduce chance of mc. I'm so desperate to conceive and not mc again that I'm willing to try anything. Wondering if I should make an appt with the GP to discuss all of this but I am worried they will just brush me off and tell me to stop wasting their time. Does anyone know anything about short LP and taking suplements? Do you ladies take anything to aid conception? Thank you so much for your help and sorry for all the questions.

Welcome monkey so sorry for your loss-that must have been devastating. Be as honest as you like here about how you are feeling. It's a safe place. I hope your stay is short!

tft I have a short LP of 10days too. I think it has shortened since the MC as my cycles are much shorter nowadays. We weren't actively trying when I got pg though so I wasn't temping or anything. Anyway, this month I suddenly panicked about it and decided to start B6. I read lots of stories online of people with short Lps taking b6 and getting their bfps the first month of taking. I bought B6 on its own and added that to my pregnacare (took 50mg b6 and the pregnacare has 10mg in it). After starting I did more research and discovered there anecdotally similar no.s of women who found B6 to mess up their cycle and delay ovulation. I panicked again and stopped it midcycle. Now in this cycle, my ovulation has been delayed from cd17 to cd23-I have no idea if the b6 is to blame as I have been really stressed for non-TTC reasons so it could well be that. I would also add that actually you should take a B complex as apparently too much b6 can affect your b12 levels and a deficiency of b12 can result in a MC. I have no idea if that would occur at the levels I was taking. So it's a minefield....I decided not to mess with things (anymore) in the end but it's a hard decision.

The only other thing I would add is I came across a published article called something like 'the irrelevance of the luteal phase'. The premise of which being that actually plenty of women conceive with a short LP and there is no evidence for any treatment that changes the LP and improves fertility so actually there is no point in considering it.....it sort of reassured me a bit?! there are also a few older threads on mumsnet about it-I think there might be links someone kindly put on an earlier thread post for me

I always take copious amounts of vitamins due to a pre existing medical condition but at present have swapped my normal A-Z for Pregnacare conception. They have a 3 for 2 offer on at Boots but if not the Healthspan website conception ones are much cheaper !

Thanks drifting and adventure. I think I probably need to stop worrying about everything and relax a bit more. I don't think I'll take any extra vitamins although I will have a look at the pregnacare conception ones as I guess they are specifically tailored to what I need right now. A more balanced diet (one that isn't based on biscuits) will probably help too...

Welcome waiting and lilbirdie- really sorry you are here. It's great though that you are able to start trying again. Best of luck.

Sorry about your gran Disney and your friend keys.

Happy birthday dobby!

My af is due today (CD32) and nothing. It is the first time since mc that I have reached my pre-mc cycle length of 31 days. I'm trying not to get carried away and just take my mind of things. Waiting to tomorrow to poas. Arghhh

CD 1.... At least this might mean my cycle is back to normal length. DH away the whole of my next fertile window so that's me out for two months...

red I'm really sorry about AF-that is rubbish. it is a positive that your cycle is getting back to normal.

Cd31 here-my cycles have been 27-28 days since the MC. luckily I temped this cycle so I know I ov'd really late otherwise I would be going even more crazy. However I have had some serious back pain and cramps today so feel fairly sure AF is on its way. Tomorrow will be cd10 which is normal for me to get AF. I am just so pissed off that it looks like I will be out again. I can't believe that my body is failing me month after month. I just don't think I can do this much longer. Also because I ovulated so late it has completely messed up my fertile period for next cycle-it would have fallen perfectly during our holiday and now falls over the weekend of our journey home when we are going to be exhausted and don't land until midnight (with 2 small kids) so quite clearly there will be no dtd then. I feel like the universe is constantly trying to tell me that I don't deserve to have anymore kids and that clearly I must be a terrible mother as it doesn't trust me to have anymore. I'm getting to the point of listening now. I also know that if I ov late again next month then I definitely won't be pregnant again by my due date of the lost baby. How has this happened? How have I got to this situation? I am just so fed up. Sorry to go on and on but I don't have anyone to talk to and I am so sad. I don't even want to talk to DH about how I am feeling as I can't even put it into words

Sorry to go on with the questions but Google gets me nowhere and people on here understand the weirdness of the post-mc cycle. I got a bfn two days ago which was 10 days after erpc. I thought that was good because it meant hcg levels were back down to normal but I'm still spotting. I had no bleeding at all for the first three days post erpc then I've had brown mucus on a panty liner and when I wipe for the last 8 days. Not sure it's even enough to call spotting. Does that mean that there's no point ttc yet as the mc isn't completely finished? I'm finding all the waiting the worst thing about the whole process. I keep resolving to be patient but then all sorts of things start going through my head - every day there's something new to worry about!

So sorry to hear you're feeling so sad drifting. Took me ages to write that post so it looks like I totally ignored you. I feel for you so much, it took a long time to conceive the DTs and I remember how painful it was month after month. Ttc for a long time after mc must be even harder. All I can say is that it doesn't in any way reflect on you as a mother, you are doing an amazing job. Hope you start to feel better and can enjoy your holiday.

drifting so sorry you are feeling so down. It is so easy in this situation to line up all of negative things you think are going to happen over the next few months and then obsess about them as if they are all happening right this minute and make yourself feel even worse. However, each day and month has to be taken one by one. I don't say this to come across as preachy (as I do exactly what you are doing myself) but rather from the perspective of someone who understands what you are going through but has a bit of distance form your particular situation. First of all, there is no way in the world that you are a bad mother, or that your mc and subsequent ttc is any message at all about it. It's just piss poor luck. Some people conceive easily after mc. Others (me included) do not. That's it- there's no more to it than that. It'll just take a bit longer. You also don't yet know exactly when you will ovulate next month, and it might be that dtd on the days either side of your travel will be all that you need. Not being pg again by your EDD of the baby you lost is a really tough one- it would be so emotional. But you are not there yet- you might ovulate perfectly on time next month. And if you do end up there, then you will get through it like you've got through what sounds like a difficult few months all around for you. You will be absolutely fine, and you will continue being the great mum you already are to your two little ones.

tft I'm afraid I think that is just life in the tortuous wtf cycle. I totally understand your real impatience. I think unfortunately it is a cycle where you just have to ride out the weird stuff, including random spotting. Your body just has a lot of work to do to get itself back on track. It'll get there.

Thank you red and tft- your words have really helped me. It does help to talk to people who understand. My DH is amazing in so many ways but he doesn't get why I feel so sad about the whole thing, or that pretty much every waking moment is consumed by thoughts about the whole TTC business. I feel a bit less despondent today-10dpo and my temperature has not yet gone down. So I guess it's good that potentially my LP might be slightly longer this month. Still terrible backache and on off cramps-constantly feel like AF is about to start and so on extreme knicker watch. Did a test today and bfn....I know it's early but then there are so many people on mn who got a bfp at 10dpo. So feeling like most likely explanation is that that AF is on the way. I just want to know either way, I hate this waiting. Also hate everything being protracted and delaying future months.

tft sorry about the spotting. I'm not really sure what's going on but I would say you are ok to TTC now in view of the bfn. Brown is likely to be old blood so it may just be the final bits of lining coming out? Hope it settles down soon for you