Assisted Conception (and all the bits that go with it) volume 9

[Scrummybumb]

A new snug for us AC ladies

Hi everyone, I hope you don't mind me jumping in. I've been lurking on and off and thought I'd introduce myself - lovely to see some good news on here too!

I'm 35, OH is 31 [he has 2 kids already from previous marriage and SA normal] I had an ectopic bloody years ago which took out the tube, and hycosy a couple of months ago showed the ovary on that side was deid too, probably had the blood supply cut when they operated on the ruptured tube. I've been referred for IVF now and so far we've ascertained my AMH is crap [4.22] my FSH is crap [14], there are months I don't ovulate [according to last months day 21] but there are months I do [last July day 21 showed progesterone at 38].

We have next appointment with consultant on 13th June, I start acupuncture on 9th June, and I've kind of given up on conceiving naturally [but we are still regularly SWI/SFF] although I know it's still a possibility, I'm just over the obsessive-ness of TTC and trying to have a mental break before the rollercoaster ride of IVF begins...

Something that is bugging me is I'm wondering whether or not I should discuss it with anyone at work? I have quite a responsible sales management role and I don't want my manager to start to pass me over for things because he knows I'm actively trying to get pregnant - I'm fairly certain he lives in fear of me announcing it anyway as he does know I want children, I'm now 35, and we are perenially under-staffed as it is! However, I know I'm going to need some short notice leave days here and there once we get into the cycle so I think he has to know really, also am I right in thinking I will need to go for scans every day? - can I ask for any words of experience from you guys?

TIA, and nice to meet you all

Scarlett welcome I would say it makes life so much easier if you can tell them what's going on. I have managed to avoid it until yesterday as ET was due to happen today and as you don't know from one day to the next potentially doing sickies adds to the stress. I came clean with my boss yesterday and he has been great and supportive of any time I need off. Good luck on your journey this thread is a great source of support and has really helped me along the way.

Hello to everyone else. I got a call this morning to say that the 3 embjes are doing so well they want to take them to blasocyst and ET is now Wed instead of today. I am praying they make it to then but they have convinced me this gives better success as they can choose the best one? They are 7, 8 and 9 cell.

Hello Scarlett! If you have the sort of work relationship where you can tell them then I think it must help. I wasn't able to, but I have a lot of autonomy up to a point over my diary (and pretended I was on holiday the week of EC and ET but made up some of the hours working at home when i was able to) but even with that at times the work issues were more strassful than the IVF! I idn't have scans anything like every day - only 2 or 3 between starting buserelin and EC but I'm sure it depends on the clinic and your own circumstances.

Weller Great news on your embies!! Well done on going to blasto! I think it's a lucky month.

bugsy How fab to see a heart beat! I've got my scan on Friday so really hoping to see one of my own then... I'll be 6 weeks 4 days if the bean is still sticking.

Sarlat how are you doing?

Afternoon to everyone else!

Scarlet I agree sharing makes things way easier and moves some of the burden from ur shoulders. This is a tough work environment and could get dangerous on u to handle both issues alone there in secret.

Weller great news on embies!

Hello to all and hope doing fine!

I wish the three weeks come quick for u/s. Since I got my 2nd beta yesterday (2093 @ 13dp5dt) I feel happy and down at same time that there is no more tests till u/s... How do u reassure urself between things? Any home tests that reveal numbers of beta, progression in preg, or the like?

welcome Scarlet. I tend to agree with the others. I think if you are able to tell your boss, then do. I had just started a brand new job when I started the cycle that I've just finished and I was so nervous. But the thought of trying to sneak around and being stressed about getting to/from appointments was actually more stressful than not saying anything. In the end I puffed myself up and went and told her and she was fantastic. I couldn't have asked for more. I felt so relieved when I did, so if you can I'd say go for it. IVF is stressful enough without adding to it if possible.

weller fantastic news about going to blast. They wouldn't do it unless they were pretty sure your embies were going really well, so that is fantastic news.

badger wow that 6 week scan has come around quickly. I bet not quick enough! I bet you can't wait to see that HB. I'm sure all will go smoothly my dear.

maple and Keziah many thanks for the advice re my cold. Feeling heaps better today, so hoping I've beaten it.

gardinas I'm not sure what you can do to reassure yourself in between. I'm at the only very early stage and I don't think I'll feel reassured maybe till that 6 wee scan. I'm heading for a blood test tomorrow so I hope that'll feel better. Maybe just buy heaps of internet tests and and test when you like if it'll help. It's funny isn't it, you think once you get that BFP all the anxiousness and worry will stop don't you? And whilst of course you are soooo delighted, it's a whole new set of worries.

Have officially joined the poking own boobs in public team. Can't help it. Poking all the time; 'do they feel sore', 'hmmm maybe, maybe not'!

Hi Scarlet I agree telling works helps if you are not going to take holiday for the weeks of ivf (and getting right weeks off can be tricky as sometimes it takes longer than expected, or there are delays). Scan wise it all depends which hospital you use - the london based private ones for eg scan you daily, NHS cycles from my experience less so. I got 8am scans on the NHS which helped with work - so it may be you just can arrange to start work later? I didn't tell work until after my consultation, after I knew my start date - as it can take months to start treatment and I didn't think it helped work by giving them more notice (it didn't but it helped me knowing no one else knew!)

Gardenia clear blue digital tests tell you your number of weeks pregnant up to a certain point, which I found helped - plus I had two early private scans, at 6 weeks and at 8 weeks (my clinic at 8 weeks, but I booked the 6 week one with a different company that just do scans!).

My little boy is currently screaming, in my dh's arms - after a complete refusal to sleep today and much of last night bless him. He will not give in to sleep for some reason right now!

Thanks Sunny and Kezi... I whave been trying teh $ store method for a few days and the sticks tend to get darker. That helped a little bit, I confess. I never tried the digital CB test, though, yet. I think I will head to store in 2 days when I feel th eworst of anticipation and worry to break th etime between till the scan. kezi, if I may ask, (feel free not to answer), r u in canada? I am. and I would love to know if there is such private scan places here. I might start checking online. Congrats on that cute baby of yours.

Weller well done on blasto. How many will you put back? I am just so excited for you! Fx for you for Weds x

Welcome Scarlet. Wether or not to tell work is a really tough one. Im a bit like Badger in that I can manage my diary. I've also taken hols for et and managed to get eve/weekend appointments. I've toyed with the idea of telling my (male) boss (who's also a friend) but I haven't so far and feel happier without anyone knowing. But it's such a personal decision. Good luck!

AFM af has been and gone. I'm having a scan weds and all being well I will start all the meds to build up my lining. Et still planned for 3 ish weeks

Weller great news on 3 blasts - hopefully one/more for the freezer too!

Gardenia - no am in the Uk. Here there are quite a few companies that just offer scans, mainly the 3d options but if they do that they also do "reassurance scans" for those before 12 weeks. If not private hospitals usually offer, at a price, private scans.. worth a check online - I didn't know this existed in the UK until I needed one! The clearblue digital say 2 weeks pregnant, 3 weeks pregnant and then 3weeks+ pregnant on them. I personally loved the cheap online sticks I got from amazon (25 for about £5 I think - I used them all!!!!) . However, I did find the weeks in pregnancy as difficult a wait as when ttc, until i got my bump.

Good luck pocket

kezi thank you so much for your informative replies. I will check online. Canada is sort of like communist country in medical stuff lol I hope i find resoanble source. Will still try the digital CB :)

If you are like me Gardenia take a photo of the CB digital results - as after a few days they "switch off" .... I used to put my mobile on, look at the photo, realise I was pregnant and carry on

Good tips Keziah about taking photos of your sticks. The non-digital ones also can fade a bit so good to get a photo at the time. Hope your bub gives in to some sleep soon!

weller it's ET tomorrow right? Best of luck my dear! Go embies go!

Visited gp today and you were guys were right, no blood test. But did 2 more test this morning (1 digital and 1 non-dig) and both were definitely positive! Do reassured me that these were extremely accurate and that there are far more false negatives than false positives. So now also just need to hold tight till first scan June 14. And I think I may be surfing Amazon for cheapies like you suggested Keziah I can't afford to buy them from boots to feed my POAS habit! I know it's very early days, but I feel much more reassured today. As you all know after so much disappointment, it's just so weird to actually let yourself believe you are pregnant!

hugs to all oxox

Someone posted a lovely poem a while back, which I've just found again. And given all the good news on here lately I thought it was worth a reminder.

When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but do not quit.

Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you can never tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit-
It's when things go wrong that you must not quit.

Btw apart from Sarlat on 2ww and Weller awaiting et am I the only one not preggers yet?

pocket no, I'm still here and not preggers!

sunnyg am so thrilled for you after your stressful treatment cycle - just goes to show you can't give up - even when the dr's want to!

I am still lurking but nothing interesting up report. AF is here but cant start cycling again till earliest next month because of holidays and work trips. Part of me is glad as im a little scared to try again and fail as that brings us closer to the end, but I know that's silly as you can't win unless you play! Am still not giving up hope of a natural bfp but as morphology at last test was zero % I think I probably need to let that one go.

Waves to everyone and sorry for not name checking - so much happens on this thread unless I'm on every day I find it hard to keep up!

Sorry Mini I'd gone back over the last few posts and missed you. Apologies. . Don't give up hope, this has been a lucky thread of late and fx Lady Luck is still hanging around for us stragglers

Weller good luck for you tomorrow my love. Will be thinking of you.

weller good luck for tomorrow.
Pocket you are nearly there
mini I know I am very early days but dh had 0% motility and really poor other counts ie number 0.5 mil.
josie and others checked with friend today who is 28+3 her AMH was 0.113 less than two months before conceiving

Enjoying hols but nervous and boob prodding

Weller Good luck for tomorrow. Hope all goes really well.

Pocket and Mini sending lots of luck your way - cheesy, to say, but I've got a good feeling about this year for all of us. :)

I'm off on hols tomorrow and won't have internet access so look forward to catching up with you all after 12th June. Will be keeping my fingers crossed for everyone and look forward to hearing lots more good news... xoxo

Thanks for messages of support for today. Didn't really sleep as too excited/nervous. Called lab yesterday for update on embies but they said they don't check them on day 4 so am praying they are still ok today.
Cyclogest giving me terrible wind hope it settles by midday when legs are in the air haha!

Hi everyone, just a quick update again, sorry I can't catch up properly yet, but I do want to say massive congrats to Sunny!!

Had my appt at the new clinic on Monday - they're willing to give short protocol a go and try a different, more potent medication to give me the best shot at responding. They also said if I don't get many follicles, they would consider going ahead as they're being encouraged to continue to EC even with fewer follicles, so it's all pretty good news. The only bad side to it is that there's a waiting list so we won't be going ahead until October. Which could be a lot worse I suppose, but still, I think I'll go mad waiting 4 months! It'll have been almost 2.5 years by that point. But hey ho, better than not trying at all. So for the next 4 months I will be forgetting about this all (yeah right), enjoy my garden and my horse, and then I'll have another cycle of IVF (and get pg with twins of course) all in time for the winter, when I won't be doing much fun stuff anyway. Maybe it's happened this way for a reason

Never give up ladies!! P.S. I want 'Hope' tattooed across my wrist, will motivate me when it seems all hope is lost

Hi to everyone, sorry not to name check, but my desk is beign moved back at work so eventually I can be back on more, though I might take a short break over these next 4 months, just to try and get it out of my head for a little while

Good luck today Weller

Josie Good to hear you've had some positive news. At least the break means you can enjoy the summer (and have a few wines in beer gardens... ) so there's definitely an upside!

Thanks for welcome everyone and for your advice re telling work.

I work from home so am able to do all the investigations under the radar, it?s more the full days I will need around EC/ET, whenever people ask for short term leave my boss instantly assumes they are going for an interview , it was really useful to hear all your opinions [fairly unanimous!]. My appt is on 13th June, and looking at the calendar this morning, what with holiday booked 27th July and how my cycles fall, I can't see us starting before September at the earliest so I think I will have a chat with my boss just before the actual cycle begins, and in the meantime try to kick back and enjoy the summer

weller good luck today! Re wind with legs in the air, when I went for my last lot of scans I realised too late I?d left my skanky comfy pumps on that make my feet smell funny I spent the whole scan apologising for the fact she had her head by my stinky bare feet, she told me she?d seen/smelt much worse in her job

scarlett thanks that made me laugh. I managed it with no accidents and they transferred a beautiful AA embryo so couldn't have hoped for better. Number 2 might make it another day to be frozen but I am happy with this one

Hurray Weller fab news! Good luck with the 2ww and don't poke your in public too much like me and some of the other ladies!!

Yay, good news! fx!