Assisted Conception (and all the bits that go with it) volume 9

[Scrummybumb]

A new snug for us AC ladies

josie and italian good luck with your tests. Thinking of you
sunnyg - i too took a bit extra on my first dose - nothing to worry about - over the two weeks it all evens out. Glad you're feeling better now. It sounded pretty nasty.
badger i hope you've got a more positive response from the clinic by now. I'd have probably screamed first and then cried out of shear anger
weller funny how our bodies just won't do what expected, when expected
lissy really nice to hear from you. I too can't believe Rosie is now 8 weeks. It sounds you are really enjoying your time with her which is nice to hear. Can't believe you went on to decorate after EC! you must be made of iron!!
minih hope you're doing ok there darling

Egg collection is tomorrow morning - that is if they are still there. Had another scare as yesterday my morning blood test showed that my body had started gearing up for ovulation. Had to go in and take a mega shot of Cetrotide to stop it from happening. As a result, had another scan in the afternoon and it was thought best I get triggered last night. Had a re-assurance scan today to check progress and that they were all still there - and will have another scan tomorrow morning ahead of the EC. I haven't got many follies on the go, but hopefully the few that I have hold good quality eggs.

I've done it! i've postponed my next FET cycle and am going to investigate immunes before progressing - am booked in with Dr Gorgy next week. I've already had thyroid and clotting tested at my current clinic - so far they look fine. I hope to God that i waste money on the immunes tests, find out there's bugger all wrong and i'll just go for the FET - but at least i'll be moving forward confidently.

sorry for the me me me post - had to get that off my chest.

Love to everyone
xx

Lissy glad all going well with Rosie. David gorgeous and having a 6 week growth spurt I think with all his feeding .. he is now nearly 10lb!

Scrummy all the best for Friday.

Italian - thinking of you.

Pocket - great you got an appointment so soon. Do you know how Dr Gorgy works? I have heard that if he says you need a prescription and you don't get it literally when you are with him then you get another admin charge (can't vouch for it, just what read others say) so worth getting tests, results and all prescriptions you need when you have set appointments with him rather than think you can phone later etc. I too hope it is a waste of money, but at least it buys you peace of mind Let us know how it goes. Oh might be worth showing him blood clotting and thrombophila results - as what he and other immune folk say isn't always the same as NHS consultants.

Scrum my good luck for tomorrow they will still be there go eggs go.
Italian and Josie here for the hand holding. Will be thinking of you but may not be able to get on here.
Pocket I for one think you have done the right thing and was going to post but you have done it. After sep m/c I was going to do level 1 didn't hope my results are ok otherwise I will feel awful.
Who has bought menevit online please give me the chemists names I am so skeptical

Josie good luck for tomorrow.

I'm just waiting to test.

Hugs to all.

Thanks Kezia and Bugsy. I do feel a sense of relief, am praying that tests show little or no treatment needed. Any tips on what to ask at my appointment next Tuesday are much appreciated. Kezia thanks for the heads up on prescriptions - anything else you know?

Scrummy lots of love for EC today. Hope all goes well and you get lots of good eggs!

Italian and Josie fx for test results.

Ps. Kezia wow David is growing. How lovely. I hope one day to be asking you for feeding tips

Scrummy best of luck for EC today. Hope they collect lots of good eggs and they fertilise well.

Pocket I think this way you will have peace of mind and know you've looked at every avenue. Worst case its a waste of money, but if it does reveal something at least you can look into remedying that before continuing.

Italian, Josie thinking of you.

Keziah I cannot believe David is six weeks already - time really is zipping by right now.

not much to report here - waiting for call from clinic to tell us if any of the remaining emby's can be frozen. Am feeling generally quite calm, but can't help getting little obsessive over every symptom, although rationale side of me knows everything I'm feeling now is treatment related, so irrelevant. It does help to be working, as forces me to think about other things and DH needs an operation next week on his knee so that should be a huge distraction ahead of testing date.

hugs to everyone xx

best of luck to you Scrummy for today's EC. It's all about quality luv! Hope it goes well ox

Thanks Kezia and Bugsy. Really feels like the right thing to do. Thanks Kezia for the tip re prescriptions - anything else I should know?

Fx for Italian and Josie for today. Big hug.

Good luck to Scrummy may you get a bounty of gorgeous eggs.

Hang in there Mini.

Love to everyone

X

Pocket if Dr Gorgy says you need a medication for x amount of time, I would get all the prescriptions you need in one go and ask specifically how you get more if he will not prescribe more than a set amount and how much it would cost you for him to prescribe again etc. I would ask for a print out of ALL results to keep - then if you want to use those test results again you don't have to pay for tests again! I would definitely get him to check any results NHS done as immune dr's have different views on levels... eg NHS said my thyroid ok, Immune dr said it was too high for conception.

Yes, can't believe that baby David is about 10lb today and 6.5 weeks!! Good he is growing, but feel sad how quickly it is going. Taking lots of photographs and got prints of his feet and hands this week (using watercolour paint - rather messy and he still has green nails, oops!)

I am going mad. Thought first post didn't work so I have doubled up.

Just had the call from the clinic and none of the five remaining embryos made it to freezing. I'm fine about that as I know that doesn't impact on our chances now. Does mean we'd have to start from scratch, but I'm not even going to start thinking about that until after this 2ww is over.

Mini sweeties. I'm sorry about the other embies. But you're so right to focus on what's already onboard. I know it's hard but try and relax and allow yourself to rest x

Menevit from Cincotta chemist: cincottachemist.com.au/search/menevit

It is Australia, but great service and total cost and postage was about £15 a month.. which was cheaper than getting all the separate vitamins and minerals that are in it from a UK chemist type place (plus could get DH to take one tablet a day, but not 6!!)

italian and josie thinking of you this morning

They collected 6 eggs yesterday, 5 of which were mature and all 5 have fertilised! Now we wait and see how they progress

sunnyg no way I could go to work today. I'm still very sore and very bloated. In fact, I was in a lot of pain last night so best prepare for a longer recovery.

Thanks to everyone for your kind wishes!

Scrummy from what I understand 5 out of 6 fertilising is fantastic news! Were you saying you were going to put 2 back in if possible? I know most clinics only want you to put 1 back in, there seems to be a lot of pressure on clinics to do so these days. Do you know if intact in the end the choice is yours? Thanks for the tip about EC. After the procedure this week I know there is no way I could have gone back to work after that. I could barely limp to the car. I'm just not sure how much time I can get off over the whole period. I know getting to the scan's won't be a problem and I was planning to take the day off for EC, but not sure if I can get the next day off as well if I want to have ET off. hmmmmm.............

Mini sorry to hear bout the rest of your embies. But I agree, don't think about that yet. Focus on the now and sending yourself plenty of good vibes about those guys (or girls!) already onboard.

pocket sounds like you've made a good plan about the immunes testing. Another thing I don't know much about but great tip from keziah about making sure you get print outs of every test done. And make sure you do it at the time. I've learnt the hard way with this whole 40 days waiting for my medical records when transferring clinics that if you don't do it then, it's so much harder after. And don't hand over one piece of paper to anyone who doesn't take a copy and check you get your original back! Sorry have turned a bit pedantic about this, but it cost me about 2 extra months which was ridiculous for just getting copies of my own records.

Also thinking of you both Josie and Italian this weekend.

Hugs to Italian and Josie xxx

Hugs and baby dust to Pocket, Josie, Maplecake, Scrummy, BadgerFace, Keziah, Lissy, Mojangles, Bugsylugs, Lexie, Weller, Mini, Sunnyg, BadgerFace, Lucy, Pumpkinjoy, vallinnapod and all. Healthy pregnancies, happy babies and families and chocolate boobs to all .

Hugs to Rowing, Londonlottie and Idreaminchocolate if you ever look in on us.

I?m afraid it is not good news for us. I did the test Thursday morning and it was negative. The clinic said to wait 2 days, continue with the drugs and then re-test, which I did.

I didn?t want to come on here with a half hearted response so I wanted to wait for the second test before posting.

The night before I did the first test I wrote this prayer/poem before I went to bed, when it talks about babies I am meaning ?projects?, not actual babies!

Are there other babies
That you would have me bare?
Are there other people
Could I learn to care?

What visions and vistas
What lights in the dark
What places to travel to

What seeds of hope can I carry, if this final seed is gone?

Please, Lord, give me
Fresh vision
So I may carry on

The good news is that unless I am totally fooling myself I actually feel a sense of peace. This was a terribly long journey for us and it is finally over. Had I got pregnant I am sure I would have been overjoyed and seen a real sense of purpose in the last six and half years and thousands of pounds of trying. For those who are trying still I know this is always a personal decision of when to stop, and I know that for me the time is now. Although I expect I will take follic acid for a while in case the treatment has stirred anything up in my body. But I am ready now to move on. My hubby and I have chatted and we would like to look into adoption and/or fostering. Our DD is very happy to have a sibling this way and has even asked about it. I was not in a place, 20 months ago when our first lot of donor IVF failed, to go into the adoption process. I was very needy and felt really quite crushed by the experiences I had had. Now I feel empowered. I have come through all this with my marriage and my sanity intact. It is not the baby I had hoped for but it is a new start. I now feel able to be of help to a child rather than just needing a child to help me! If that makes sense! I genuinely feel that with my DH, my adorable DD and God that our family is complete so if this process is not right for all of us then so be it.

I am very grateful to all of you for sharing this journey with me, for you kind and wonderful comments and your helpful information, and your prayers.

I am sorry if at times I am long-winded, full of advice or if I have ever sounded sanctimonious! I can honestly say if I were not a follower of Christ that I would not be able to be this peaceful about the whole process. I know that many terrible things happen in the world and our treatment failing is not one of them. I can move on from this and I will. It is possible that we will adopt and the child we will adopt is already in this world, that is quite an exciting thought! My body has been through a fair bit with treatment, drugs, my tummy is like a pin cushion, clinic and even hospital visits and being overweight (I started a new weigh loss course run by the local PCT called OWLS) and so I will be getting my body fit for the challenges of the rest of my life now rather than for baby carrying.

Anyway, enough whittling on from me. I am posting this on the two threads I am on and I will pop back for news of your various successes. I am only sorry I will not get to meet you all in real life.

I might be hanging out on the adoption threads from now on, and also on the Philosophy/religion/spirituality threads. So do come and find me for a chat if you want to.

If anyone wants to stay in touch remember you can by the old email - it is my name on here and my imaginary age (39) at yahoo dot co dot uk

You are a fabulous bunch.

Thank you.

God Bless you all.

Oh Italian I am so sorry that it didn't work out for you.

Although I have not had to go down the IVF route to have my child as you did I am sure you agree we have been blessed to conceive and carry a baby and be where we are now. Adoption or Fostering is a big step and it is reassuring to see that you are now at that stage where the TTC process has drawn to a close and you can see a bright future ahead.

Your poor husband will now just have to put up with the normal female hissy fits instead of drug induced ones

Hoping Josie is ok - radio silence not a good sign :(

Having a flutter on National so here is hoping my horse at least finishes!!!!!

Hugs all x

Dear Italian. I am so so sorry. I was praying that this had worked for you. You are such a good soul, you deserve much happiness. You have been such a huge support to me on my journey - from the very first time you found me on another thread and invited me here. Thank you. Lots of love and light to you, DH and DD. x

italian i am so, so sorry to hear your news. I would like to thank you for sharing your journey with us and for being there for us with your kind and wise words when we needed support. You truly have a gift with words and for sensing on what is the right thing to say. And a gift for writing beautiful poems.
I am glad that you have found peace with your future plans and i sincerely believe that if anybody can bring harmony and happiness to an adopted/foster child - you can.
I wish you and your family all the happiness that life can bring. God bless you all

italian so sorry

Hi Lexie, Pocket1, Scrummy and wellerbabe, thank you for your lovely, kind words, thoughts and prayers.

Josie my darling, thinking of you.

Mini so sorry to hear about your five little ones, but try and concentrate now on your two on board. Hugs.

Pocket did you want to ask about immune testing? Keziah probably knows more than me but I'm happy to answer any questions.

Badger what happened, did you ask about plan B?

Sunnyg how's it going.

Scrummy 5 out of 6 is great, I think. Well done.

I am aware looking at my mego-long post that there might be others who have had bad news and feel very frustrated etc. I know that in the past I have felt much worse than I do now, so I just wanted to say that I know we are all different and I would not want my long-winded post to put anyone off coming on here and VENTING at how unfair this whole process is. It IS totally unfair how easy some get pregnant and others do not. I know that. I guess what I'm saying is that lots of people will have lots of opinions and one is that we wasted tons of time and money but I wasn't able to do it any other way and it has made me feel ready to move on, so in one sense I don't think I could have done it any other way! But others might be hurting and so those responses are totally understandable too. As I say we are all different. I'm just so hoping that my other cycle buddies and thread buddies will have a better time of this. Huge hugs to you all.

PS I am enjoying a lovely glass of wine and had a great time with DH this morning now the no sex/no drinking/lots of injecting in the tummy sessions are over!

Italian - am so sorry. Want to post properly but no words now - so please pop back to read!! Hug your dd and I pray that you will find a beautiful baby that needs you in the coming months and years x