Freak Out Room For Those Newly Updiffed After M/C Part VII

[Blackkat]

Just found out you are pregnant after a previous miscarriage and too nervous to move over the to pregnancy boards? Freaking out about spotting, cramping, symptoms (or lack there of) and nervously awaiting your first scan? Here is a lovely place for lot's of support, hand holding and problem sharing.

Courtesy of owlbooty here are the Ten Commandments of the Freak Out Room.

1. Thou shalt check thy knickers to the point of insanity until the baby actually arrives.
2. Thou shalt also check the loo roll post-wipeage (sorry, gross, I know)
3. Thou shalt bore thy physician and midwife to tears with the mentalling.
4. And thy husband/boyfriend/family/neighbour's cat.
5. Thou shalt obsess over the absence of symptoms.
6. And the presence of symptoms.
7. And the fluctuation of symptoms.
8. Thou shalt pee on a vast number of sticks and keep ClearBlue and First Response in business.
9. The day before any scan extreme mentalling is permitted without recourse to the Haddock.

10. Self-diagnosis with Dr Google is Forbidden.

The Haddock will be applied liberally to all transgressors.

See here for the previous thread

Bumpgrowing Quavers sound lush. I'm currently obsessing about Party Rings. I only want the yellow ones and I'm going to have to go to Saino's on the way back from work now.

Shush with all the sweet talk - the walk to the shop is tooooo far!

bigmacsauce - you're right - hadn't thought about the new level of mentalling.... I wonder what would happen if we pooled all the mentalling energy on this thread - reckon we could create a tsunami somewhere...!

Appointment went well, HB was fine and baby was kick boxing around so MW kept having to refind the HB. She said I would be feeling this one very soon given how active they are. They've also booked me in in two weeks for another listen and will do so again at 22 weeks. They rock.

Mentalling done for one day, thanks for good wishes ladies.

Hoping all stays calm for bigmacsauce and calms down for MistressP

lara hoping you are ok????

to everyone xx

I suppose I did deserve it!!

harassed booo to ms!!! Mine came and went too after 12 weeks. Eased alot around 16wks and it's more or less vanished. Hope you're feeling better tomorrow!

yrmotb I'm glad someone will be with you, even if it's after. Good luck sweet, what time is it? Thanks for the special hugs! I know I'm being soft, and so shoukd be grateful that I am updiffed again.

Well done faintpositive for arranging scan. You'll be roughly 8 weeks then so a good time to go. Fx for you.

Looks around for all these lovely sweeties and realises all you greedy lot have scoffed them all there isn't any. Contemplates whether to get pick and mix or popcorn at the cinema tonight?!!
lurking for blackkat hope all went well

X posts with blackkat yay for hb and active bean! Bean will be kicking you black and blue then soon?!! Lovely that you're booked in again fir another sneaky listen. Was this your 16wk apt? Did they take your bloods? I wasn't tested for iron or anything. Or weighed???

Yup 16 wks, got all my blood results, all fine, they check them again at 28 wks apparently. Wasn't weighed either? Though that was a relief!
Now mentalling about how much baby is moving about!! Ridiculous I know

blackkat so pleased appt went well.

bigmac glad things have settled, my db lives littlehampton.

hihp yay people live near me. should definately meet up sometime.
Anyone else??

right, I think I'm ready to join you lovely ladies if you'll have me.

I've been lurking for a while but I think it's time to take some of my pregnancy symptoms out of the common room thread in case it's a bit insensitive. I'm currently 11+2 (hello updiffed) and due to have my nuchal/dating scan in two weeks.

Waves to YRMOTB, blackkat, Collie and anyone I know already, and waves to people I don't know

Oh and I'm down sarf too not so far from Harrassed and Cep

Wow this thread has moved on so quickly today!

Mistress what's the latest? i hope the bleeding has totally stopped and you are feeling ok.

Collie just coming back to you on your bra question which you posted last night (about a hundred posts ago!) I would definitely get a new well fitting normal bra at this stage. The maternity ones with feeding flaps are not that beautiful usually and you will be in them for long enough after the birth as it is, so personally I wouldn't get one now. You cannot even imagine how much your boobs will change size, shape and texture when your milk comes in (think american footballs), so best to stick with normal bras for the mo I think, as you will have to get a whole new set of feeding bras post-birth. Wearing a badly fitting bra now is really bad news and your boobs will be working so hard in the coming months they need a bit of TLC with a lovely new pretty one I think! I would recommend going to a maternity clothes shop (which stocks underwear obviously) to get measured. I don't think that high street stores like M&S are great at measuring pregnant bodies, whereas the specialist shops really know what they're doing. If the bras in those shops are ridiculously pricey then you can always just get measured there and then order the bra online!! I have been having the same dilemmas and went to a great shop to get a new bra last week. It is underwired, but has so much material covering the wires that she said it would be fine for pregnancy. She also said also make sure that when you buy one, it does up on the tightest hooks - then you can loosen it as your ribcage expands (as all your organs are shifted upwards by the baby ha ha) and you will get more wear out of it!

Quick question for you guys - am I mad for buying a fetal heartrate monitor (it hasn't arrived yet)? DH thinks I will stress out too much if I can't find anything, but I honestly am finding all this waiting really hard. Has anyone else got one???!!!

Hi ladybird. hmmm. Much the same. Very period-like aches all day, lower back ache, some brown, some red goo on wiping and on pad. I'll try my midwife again tomorrow and see what she says. I've had an easy day and have the same planned for tomorrow. I just hate this limbo. In my head I'm pretty sure a MC is on the way, but I still have a glimmer of hope that things could be ok. I think I'd just rather know, so I can get on with the grieving and planning for the future, but then that makes me feel guilty for writing off this baby too quickly. Argh. This mentalling could go on for days!

Hello!
Sorry been lurking like a right weirdo for days. First mw appt yesterday which for some reason sent me into a complete spin. Had a dream I went and she laughed at me and said 'you're not pregnant you weird lady, now f*ck off'. So then pooped myself that would actually happen.

Weirdly though, I went and she treated me like I was actually pg and would end up with a baby. I nearly cried! So just waiting for scan dates and hope that when they look there is a real baby in there rather than cobwebs and tumbleweed.

Hello to newbies, sorry to hear about bleeding. Hope all is ok now.

And hi to everyone else! I skim read the last 50 pages and am glad everything seems to be ticking along nicely bar the odd freak out/spotting terror.

I offer cake and alcohol free wine...

freezing welcome, so good to see you here...I'm about to pinch owl's superglue!!

cep will be thinking of you tomorrow

mistressp keep those feet up and hope M/W is more help tomorrow.

Right, if you are interested in northern meet up then please PM either me or Collie and we'll stop blethering on about it on the thread.

to all

all, just wanted to ask which fetal doppler you have and was it reasonably priced? I've just had a quick look on Amazon and can't make head or tail as I don't know what I'm supposed to be looking for. I know I'm jumping the gun a bit as I might not even get any further, but any advice appreciated!

willitbe Don't worry 2-3wks sounds about right for 5+3 gestation. Remember that every woman has a different level of hcg in their body so the test isn't very reliable.

blackkat good luck for the appointment - I am sure everything will be fine!

mistress hope everything works out for you, bleeding doesn't always mean the end, so take care of yourself.

bigmac I'm already feeling nudges at random times during the day, and you're right, it does open a door to a whole new world of mentalling. I poked my lower belly today to make him/her nudge me . But I was guilty of doing that when pregnant with DD too - and that pregnancy was completely stress free for me.

Good luck to cep and yrmotb* for tomorrow's scans!

Hi to everyone else!

yrmotb Good luck for today sweetie.

mama i found it weird they don't double check just take my word for it. congrats.

Morning ladies
I'm back in the UK safely (despite a freak out on boarding the plane - decided I was going to faint and for some unknown reason I shouldn't get on the plane, as I just has a bad feeling about it?!). Thank god for DH's anxiety mgt skills he really talked me off the ledge and the flight was pretty uneventful after I calmed down.

So, a belated but warm welcome to bigmac, mistressp, faintpos and freezing and anyone else that I've missed.

Great news about the good appt and HB yest blackkat. Good luck with the scan today yrmotb. Hello to collie, Lara cep and anyone else who has migrated or at least dipped their toes on the grads forum. I hope you'll stay lurking with us for a whilst too!

I was thinking about dachs whilst I was away and I've seen that she's posted on another thread here which is nice to know.

Has anyone heard from hairy? here's hoping all is well if she's lurking.

Thanks to you all for reading my rant about the SiL and bridesmaid. I think some of you are right that she knew the situation-I had that thought at the time and that really upset me that you would behave that way if you knew. My BIL and new SIL have made no secret of their desire to start a family so perhaps there is some jealousy there, although I'd still hope that they would be able to be pleased for us after what we've been through already! Anyway, enough of that.

So, my ever lasting anxiety doesn't seem to be letting up really, just seems to be spreading to other things. When we got home last night we were sat having some decaf tea and toast and feeling quite content, then I remembered that my combined test results should have arrived whilst we were away. I checked the mail and nothing, then I looked at the NT report and it said low risk results would be posted out within 7 days-my test was on the 9th June so they really should be here. I had a couple of missed calls from an unknown number whilst i was away so I spent the rest of the night stressing about that and how everything was going to be bad news. I'm still feeling uber nervous now thinking about it-gonna try and call the hosp at 9am to see if I can get any more info-eek, I'm starting to regret having the test now...

Is anyone else completely irrational when it comes to freaking out? I mean some of the freak outs I've had before the scans make sense but now I feel that they can just happen quite randomly. The triggers seem to be anything that puts me back into the 'pain' of events before, and then everything feels virtually as raw as it was at the time and I cry really hard and just say things like 'our baby, our baby' as if I've been told we've lost it. I realise this confession has probably taken me into a whole new realm of mentalness and you may well all start avoiding me now!!!!

Oh doo. Have a hug. Ring the hospital. I'm sure all is fine and they are just administratively challenged.

I've been reading the thread that dachs has joined. In my current state maybe not a good idea, but somehow reading what those women gave been through, and how they are ready to try again gives me hope.

I'm spending another day at home. DS has been dropped off at nursery, papers purchased, and Lorraine on the box. She's looking very thin. I draw the line at Jeremy Kyle though. I tune in to Woman's Hour instead. Must be getting more discerning in my old age.

Things much the same here. Brown and red spotting and aches. Trying to rest and eat well. Do you think I should stop drinking tea? I've been thinking about the whole caffeine MC link. But tea is so good when you're in need of TLC. Oh, I sure am embracing this mentalling craic.

Hope the rest of you are ok today. I can't get the hang of name-checking yet; I can't seem to go back and I'll get everyone mixed up. Will get there in the end though.

Morning, morning Ladies - so glad to see I was missed . 'Tis nice to feel loved....

Well done for hanging in there mistressofp. You're so right, it's the frustration of not knowing what's going on with your body that is so hard to deal with. I would definitely call the midwife again today. Or maybe they have had a cancellation at the EPU? My logical brain says that a cup of tea or 2 is unlikely to make any difference at all, but my pregnancy obsessive brain says maybe get some decaf tea (PG tips is what I've got at the moment and it's ok) just so you don't give yourself anything else to worry about! I would pop to the shops for you if I could! Hope you have a restful day at home and at least they have got the roof on at Wimbledon so you can still watch it in the rain!! Enjoy those bronzed thighs..... :o

Thanks for the hug mistressp I called them and they said it was a very good result and it was on it's way. Sometimes I don't think I'm fit to raise a child the way I can work myself up into a tizz, seriously, I'm going to immerse myself in haddock for that little episode and stop boring you all with my hysteria.

Sorry to hear that you're spotting etc mistress, it's so worrying isn't it. I had a bit at 9, 10 and 11 weeks and all seems fine now, although mine tended to be after gentle exercise so I cut that out to try to avoid anymore stress. Sorry for not being up to speed but how far are you now and are you able to get scanned in the near future? Wishing you a restful day with no more aches and spotting x

Forgot to say hi/welcome to ladybird too - forgive my jet lagged brian!

Lara i thought your Hols must be coming up, have fun with the packing. I found the heat a bit much but I got one of those water spray things for my handbag for any over heating scenarios when I couldn't get to air conditioned comfort! I had no joy with the upgrades but you're further on and therefore more deserving of luxurious treatment, so fingers crossed for you!

Right, off to do the washing and reprimand myself for unnecessary panicking

Oh and re the tea, I'm sure it's fine mistress but I just tend to limit myself to one a day and then do decaf. This is mainly cos caffeine has a longer half life when you're pregnant, meaning that it stays in your system longer than it normally would. For me, this can make me a bit ore anxious than usual, as you all know, I don't need any more assistance in being anxious! If you haven't got decaf in, you could do what someone else suggested a while ago and brew the tea, then chuck that cup away and make another one with the same bag. Apparently that gets rid of most of the caffeine.

Scooby Welcome Home!!! So nice to have you back, and the hospital will just be being slow. My blood results hadn't arrived for my 16 week appointment bcs the post is so slow. They were on the computer though. All will be well ((hugs))

Lara so pleased to hear from you, you and Collie have inspired me to take DH to Mamas and Papas, though I doubt we will be buying anything.

Cep and YRMOTB good luck for today, thinking of you xx

Waves to Mistress Ladybird Freezing milkys and everyone else xx

Anyone brave enough to update the list?

Great news about the test results dooscooby! Am so pleased that you found out so quickly to avoid extra days of stressing.... Thanks for the tea info too!

Am quite concerned about the heat but the lovely WIW PMed me some recommendations. I shall be spending most of the week in the kiddie pool I think (which has a fab sun canopy).

I don't think I'll get any special treatment either although Qatar did ask me to bring a letter and mention it at check-in so that they can log it on the system (might have already said this earlier). I am looking quite pg now (but it might be due to constipation!)

Ooh - got the dentists later. My gums are now horribly swollen.

xposts Scoobs so pleased that the results were fine.
Now get yourself out on the zen terrace

Good to hear that scooby.

Good luck today CEP

Thanks for all the wishes, I'm at tea time today.