Howdy pardners, grab your corset and mosey on down to the BESHt Little Whorehouse for all Wannabe Differs (30's)

[LadyGoneGaga]

Why howdy pardners, tighten your corsets, put a feather in your hair, pull on your boots and garter (*nipple tassles optional but welcome) and mosey on down to the BESHt little whorehouse in all of Diffas. Where the finest 30?s TTCers will fulfil your every need. There?s firewater -?Hendricks-- on tap and we?ll WOOFL you until you can?t WOOFL no more. Yeehaaw.

Menu
Straight up ? the best rootin?, tootin? baby making sechs in 7 counties
Cougar style ? like Doggy but with claws, acceptable for updiffage
Rodeo ? to be followed by a quick dismount to avoid leakage
Sherrif style ? with spurs on
Backdoor ? Recreational but not recommended

Specials
Dildocam ? Half price this month only
Needlework/Foot massage ? for those who like it a little bit woo
Zinc shooters ? to keep the posse on the straight and narrow
Positive thinking ? by the glass
Eggwhite omelettes ? to keep your energy levels up
Gentlemen are kindly reminded to leave all prophylactics by the door and to kindly leave the cowboy juice in the receptacles provided as directed.

My slight concern this month is that should I get the bfp my due date would be about 2 minutes into August - which is when all the shit new junior doctors rock up and the mortality rate in hospitals spikes by 6% . Joy.

Also; G - absolutely yes. When I got divorced and was starting to date again I was horrified at the number of mid-thirties men who seemed to think they could still postpone having a family/sorting out their horrific debts/getting a pension/etc etc i.e. behaving like an adult. God I sound so middle-aged. Oh yes, that's right, I am middle-aged and so are they but they were still acting like teenagers. Pffft.

Well hope demon obviously took pity on me cos drioed this am- two days early (know it's not hugely early, but strange for me) Have friends coming round in half an hour- one 6 week old, two 6 months old, one pg. Joy. I actually think I hate the bitter/evil side of not winning more than the not winning sometimes-salty's wise words struck a chord with me the other day- wish I'd heard them about 6 years ago, def think I'm not same person I would've been if we'd not struggled so much. Good news is, though I fully intended to crack open the red when/if babyfail, I am going to the cinema tonight, so will resist, and therefore be super healthy etc for next month. And thin (ner)
hope all's wel with you- owl think palais traditionally needs to have easy access to alcohol, so we need some kind of delicious eatery with a licence> Perhaps beach hut restaurant, with view of sunset/surfers/life guards, whiloe we nosh? Will leave it with you, off to be surrounded by babies..... Fish slaps and nipple tweaks all round

droid
salty
well
while

please copy out ten times.

Hawaii Five-O?

Sorry about the droid Starryskies, I hate the dashing of hopes. And usually coincides with having to see some babies/preggo's. Have some lovely firewater, yum yum. We need to finish it off. Maybe take Cap'n Jack upstairs for abit. I saw him sneak in earlier looking bit disshevelled the dirty boy.

What're you going to see starry? Sorry about the droidage...

I don't mid where la palais floats to next but would like to announce that <a class="break-all" href="http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=image3.examiner.com/images/blog/EXID14380/images/Alexander_Skarsgard_True_Blood.jpg&imgrefurl=www.examiner.com/celebrity-fitness-and-health-in-national/alexander-skarsgard-i-am-not-a-hollywood-guy-video&usg=__pwWmeYe38V5Q6ifHnHmNJDlg0wI=&h=352&w=239&sz=30&hl=en&start=45&zoom=1&tbnid=S41RuC-898fDTM:&tbnh=136&tbnw=103&prev=/images%3Fq%3Deric%2Btrue%2Bblood%2Bspa%26hl%3Den%26biw%3D1276%26bih%3D604%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:10%2C879&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=665&vpy=176&dur=257&hovh=273&hovw=185&tx=104&ty=153&ei=9njaTNjzAsWXOov5pfwI&oei=4njaTNDZB9ug4QbkjLGOCQ&esq=3&page=3&ndsp=19&ved=1t:429,r:3,s:45&biw=1276&bih=604" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this will be in the showers wherever we go!

Hmmm, floating. Maybe we could float down De Nile? Nice and warm there. Stop looking at my asp.

owlie

Double yuck, Bitey. He's defo a BOBFOC.

Like the idea Owlie. The BESH go on a cruise down de Nile.

Hmm, maybe some sort of chocolate shop ala Chocolat? Then we could have lovely hot chocolates spiked with rum and topped with whipped cream. and tiffin and chocolate covered kirsch cherries etc. And loads fo flavoured liquors.

Sprout is going to be a Gemini, which means it with be 2 against one but at least we will all be air signs. Not sure how I am going to cope with 2 schizos in the family :o

What is a BOBFOC lady? Is it a "wouldn't touch him with yours" sort of thing?

hahaha I've not heard that in years! "Body Off Baywatch;Face Off Crimewatch".

I gave up wtih men my own age - all seemed to have "ishoos" - met a lovely 22 year old who wanted a family - says that most of his friends are very family-orientated having been dicked around by useless dads bedause of mass family break-ups in the 80s.

See, there you go again mentioning tiffin.

Last night I went home and ate several tablespoonfuls of leftover chocolate butter icing straight from the fridge. I have no self restraint when it comes to chocolate.

Hey, nofink wrong with a sensible, down to earth Taurean I'll have you know .

Oooh, just went really dizzy when stood up. Must be diffed right?

bitey wouldn't you rather have this in the shower?
I's recommend a voodoo doll on your desk that looks just like your co-worker and stick pins in it viciously as she walks by.

Boo I'm also in the shagshagshag phase. Have pant snot, will shag. Lot's of menkul to be done here shortly.

Truffles YANBU about the wedding - doesn't the universe rotate around the BESHies?

Ladygag Definitely. Most definitely.

The other fred I'm on just got 3 (count 'em) BFPs. :(

oooooh milenimum that's my kind of guy! Also like voodoo doll idea vvv much!

ladygonegiddy yes, fo' sho'.

I have really itchy boobs, not nips but whole boobular area. Diffed? Or change of detergent plus lacy bra?

This is <a class="break-all" href="http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=www.anorak.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/torture.jpg&imgrefurl=www.anorak.co.uk/200142/media/the-torture-of-wearing-a-man-bra-crawford-confesses.html&usg=__tNnMxJiKXXbt4Pgwca-GmejLO1Y=&h=413&w=425&sz=68&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=vmd9ZMsV7v3n6M:&tbnh=135&tbnw=139&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dman%2Bwearing%2Bbra%26hl%3Den%26biw%3D1276%26bih%3D604%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=122&vpy=98&dur=6235&hovh=221&hovw=228&tx=145&ty=91&ei=RKjaTPXsF4GI5Aby99SVCQ&oei=RKjaTPXsF4GI5Aby99SVCQ&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=22&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">me milano if you want a peek?

Has posting nudie pics over-stepped boundaries and killed fred?

Actually read the article behind picture and feel rather bad now

Not sure of qualifying for BESH thread due to existing offspring

Hello blue - tis not a disqualifying thing, we even accept people who don't drink gin. Can you believe it.

Bitey I can't believe you lingered on the horrific picture long enough to read the article. Sick, sick woman. ;p

Hello blue