Howdy pardners, grab your corset and mosey on down to the BESHt Little Whorehouse for all Wannabe Differs (30's)

[LadyGoneGaga]

Why howdy pardners, tighten your corsets, put a feather in your hair, pull on your boots and garter (*nipple tassles optional but welcome) and mosey on down to the BESHt little whorehouse in all of Diffas. Where the finest 30?s TTCers will fulfil your every need. There?s firewater -?Hendricks-- on tap and we?ll WOOFL you until you can?t WOOFL no more. Yeehaaw.

Menu
Straight up ? the best rootin?, tootin? baby making sechs in 7 counties
Cougar style ? like Doggy but with claws, acceptable for updiffage
Rodeo ? to be followed by a quick dismount to avoid leakage
Sherrif style ? with spurs on
Backdoor ? Recreational but not recommended

Specials
Dildocam ? Half price this month only
Needlework/Foot massage ? for those who like it a little bit woo
Zinc shooters ? to keep the posse on the straight and narrow
Positive thinking ? by the glass
Eggwhite omelettes ? to keep your energy levels up
Gentlemen are kindly reminded to leave all prophylactics by the door and to kindly leave the cowboy juice in the receptacles provided as directed.

Hello hags,
biteme I luffs him [happy] thanking you longtime- come here and let me show my appreciation

So sorry foxygordans Am v that in my haste last night I did confuse you with another gin, I hope I didn't offend. You be well and truly knee deep in the menkul I believe. Dare I ask if anyone has kicked you in the kidney area? Glad you had good quality hol- we did same, re: wine and all bad foods and shizz- was definitely worth it, and I'm sure positive relaxant effects directly combat any negative alcohol ones.

Er Foxygin have you POAS yet? If not you are built of very stern stuff indeed. Sounds like you had a lovely hollibob and don't go ruining the relaxation with stressing about a few drinks.

Starrystarrynight Shittincrap to roof leak, hope it hasn't caused too much damage.

I'm sorry for not catchin up proper like with everyone else - you may get the whip out and start cracking it away all over my arse if you like. No, please do, I haz missed the erotiviolence

No problem Moleina. Yes it is official, the menkul has momentarily got the better of me. Probably assisted by the fact that work has been exceptionally shite lately so am tired and emotionable.

But at least my roof is hole-free - you poor Mole! Am sending virtual hugs and an extremely funky virtual umbrella.

(Think this thread is in danger of turning into Wind in the Willows - Mole, Owl, Fox. Sure I've seen a Badger on here somewhere)

Only an ArseBadger, ginferret

Yes, cinco is right. Whyfor the no POAS?

Oh dear, we are all truly evil. Ignore us, ginfairy

No Cinco, have not POAS yet. DH is away and I'm not allowed to know more than a few second before he does. Anyway I'm only 4 days over.

I know - I'll get the whip out on you to relieve my frustration! Take that you bad girl!

gosh gin I am impressed by your ability not to cheat on that! You must have some serious resolve but fingers firmly crossed for you.

Sorry to hear about all the droidage going on today :( BB that sounds doubly crap for you with the wedding and the babies.

Cinco pliz to bare those lilly white buttocks for purposes of caning

Oi Truffers! Wait your turn! I hasn't finished yet.

No, don't stop! Pliz to both whip at same time

Is 4 days not that long for you then foshofoxy, if it was me then 4 hours late and the piss stick is whipped out. I'm never even 4 hours late mind.

"only 4 days over" Think you are a legend foxy...foxy...lady (says she who tested on DAY droid was due)

babsvag and lyraloo sorry to hear droid has arrived to bleed on the parade again :( specially to early droid, wtf is with that?

Is bloody freezing here too and horribly rainy, ended up being half hour late for work due to horrendous driving conditions, I was not amused. No time to have a hole in the roof moley can't you fashion some sort of temporary bung from used pee sticks or something?

In footwear news I am so chuffed that I got the bargain of all bargains today. I was complementing one of my workmates on her boots yesterday and turns out she got them from work. I asked if they still did them and she said she didn't think so but she had got an extra pair from the sample sale just in case and would I like them. For the grand total of £1.50. I am so lucky! They are leather zip up knee boots with a lighter tan band round the top a bit like hunting riding boots. Luscious!!

I now can't move after scoffing far to much delish veggie pearl barley stew made by the lovely Mr T. I'm now off dairy and wheat and so happy to hear stories of bread and cheese, not! This is v bad considering I'm a baker and can no longer taste test my cakes :( I see a new line of dairy and wheat free cakes making an appearance

Shit sorry I missed crap droidage happenings. I am very rude. BB think we may be near enough twinz now due to my own making a fucking painful appearance on Sat. Hence renewed optimism in my voice....same every month.....

4 days is ages for me CT, am usually scarily punctual.

Truff! Gerroff me kidneys! I needs them for processing the vast quantities of tea I drink everyday. You can punch my liver tho, that's nice and tough from years of abuse training.

oops sorry should be more gentle. I think a line in dairy/wheat free cakes would go down a treat. So many people know seem to be intolerant at the mo.

Better idea Leafy - why don't we all volunteer as cake-testers? It would be a huge sacrifice obviously, but we would struggle through it to keep the Cincotart bakery in business.

In other news, I just answered a total of 3 questions correctly on University Challenge. A personal record!

Hey up hags (reet proper Derby expression there!)

Cinco stew sounds fab. Would kill me to not eat cheese. I luff it.

G&T your patience astounds / amazes me. I am in awe

Moley - badtimes re rain leakage. I had similar in my old house. Got stressed. Water everywhere. Tears. Cavalry arrived (my Dad) looked at roof. Told me gutter wasn't close enough to wall. Moved it. Water stopped. I felt v silly.

I have bought grapefruit juice. When Mr Sol comes home I will jump him. I don't care that he has been working 12 hour days for past week.....

3? I think that might actually be a record internationally for normally brained people-I get exctied enough if I vaguely understand the question, never mind answer it! kudos to the brainfox! So are there any symptoms that those of us who are going to offer to menkal for you need to know about? And when is DH back? I'm not sure it's fair for us you to have to wait if it's a really long time...why don't you let us decide?

am still wating to findd out what wol does with her shoe pictures...

Fanks Sunny. I didn't really think 4 days of pretending not to have noticed that it's been 4 days was anything to be proud of. But as y'all seem to think so I will feel a bit smug [smug emoticon for emphasis]

see how excited- can't even spell it.

Waiting. oh ffs.

Ey up me ducks ;)

Ginnygingin You're always punctual you say, hmmmmmmm, when does Mr Fox return?

Rocky Your new boots sound lovely, and such an amazing bargain. Very that you can get gorgeous samples from your work. Anymore in a size 6 chuck em this way will you, I'd like some ankle boots I think to go with pencil/knee length type skirts. Tiny heel required though as I'm useless with anything over 2 inches

Solwithlime Good luck with the jumping.

I have just used a face mask for the first time in years - I have the chin of a spotty 13 year old, apparently hormonal and very common in women in their thirties (so says Dr Google). I'm getting very peeved as never ever suffered with spots before but for the last year it's getting progressively worse Skin feels lovely and smooth now - well apart from where the spots are.

Stop. It's Lucastime.

Well Starlet, the only symptom thus far is sore bosoms, which I get every month anyway. DH is back tomorrow, so might possibly POAS then. Will of course keep you as informed as poss without actually taking laptop into bathroom with me.

Re: footwear, am keen to see the Rocket's new boots. You can't get wellies for £1.50, never mind FMBs.

Cincotart 'reet duck?! Have you tried any Temple Spa products? They are luffly for spotty chins nice link to luffy things